![\"una](\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/a-woman-and-a-man-with-a-relationship-problem.jpg\")
<\/p>\n\"La expectativa es la ra\u00edz de todas las penas\". W. Shakespeare <\/i><\/p>\n
Si tuvi\u00e9ramos que enumerar las causas del fin de las relaciones, empezar\u00edamos por el enga\u00f1o, la manipulaci\u00f3n, la deshonestidad y, en el peor de los casos, el abuso.<\/p>\n
Todo eso es cierto. Todas ellas son, en cierto modo, las razones m\u00e1s crueles y dolorosas para poner fin a una relaci\u00f3n. La silenciosa, la que nunca pensar\u00edamos que pudiera ser la \u00fanica portadora de finales, son las expectativas no cumplidas.<\/p>\n
They don’t come suddenly. They build themselves up over the course of time. One after the other and every time our significant other fails to meet our expectations, it adds to our disappointments in him. It accumulates frustration that is bound to burst at any given moment.<\/p>\n
When that happens, it’s already too late.<\/p>\n
Think about it. If we are being honest with ourselves, we all have certain predictions and beliefs of how our partner will behave in a relationship. That expectation is unrealistic because we don’t communicate it to them.<\/p>\n
I didn’t come to this conclusion just like that. If it was just my common thinking, I would put lack of communication, money issues, and constant fights as the top three reasons, because I observe my environment and the people around me who are getting out of long-term relationships and even getting divorced list those three main reasons.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Pero cuando tuve la oportunidad de hablar en profundidad sobre el tema con ellos, me di cuenta de que todos tienen un factor com\u00fan<\/b>\u2014<\/b>expectativas insatisfechas. Me di cuenta de que un falta de comunicaci\u00f3n<\/a> combinado con expectativas no cumplidas es lo que mata la mayor\u00eda de las relaciones. <\/b><\/p>\n Una de mis amigas casadas me hablaba de sus problemas matrimoniales. Me contaba que ten\u00eda una imagen completamente diferente en su cabeza de c\u00f3mo deber\u00eda ser todo. Se hab\u00eda inventado un reino armonioso en el que no hab\u00eda problemas.<\/p>\n She expected certain things from her husband. She wanted him to help her around the house, she wanted him to help her more with their children, she wanted for him to make lunch on his days off so she didn\u2019t always have to and there were millions of other small things like that that she wanted.<\/p>\n Knowing her well, as we have been friends for half of our lives, I just asked if she ever asked him for help. And I knew that the answer was, \u201cNo\u201d before she even told me. <\/i><\/p>\n She said she thought that he should know these things without any need for her to remind him. She just went on and on, with, \u201cThey are obvious,\u201d \u201cThat is some basic stuff everyone should know, \u201cHe should know that,\u201d \u201cHe is not stupid,\u201d and, \u201cHe knows I need help.\u201d<\/p>\n La escuch\u00e9. Entonces le record\u00e9 nuestra pelea de hace mucho, mucho tiempo. Se enfad\u00f3 conmigo porque pensaba que yo deber\u00eda haber hecho algunas cosas con respecto a ella de otra manera y guard\u00f3 silencio al respecto hasta que fue demasiado tarde y para entonces ya est\u00e1bamos discutiendo a lo grande.<\/p>\n I clearly remember saying, \u201cI can’t read your mind, speak up.\u201d That’s where it all calmed down.<\/p>\n Lo que mi amigo y la mayor\u00eda de nosotros olvidamos comprender es que nadie puede leernos la mente, que si queremos algo de alguien, debemos pedirlo.<\/b><\/p>\n Todos tenemos percepciones diferentes de c\u00f3mo deben ser las cosas, especialmente entre hombres y mujeres. Entienden las cosas de manera diferente. Ven las cosas de manera diferente. Somos individuos completamente distintos.<\/b><\/p>\n When you don’t speak up, you sweep your problems under the rug. You fail to communicate and you just keep on expecting and getting disappointed because things don\u2019t meet your expectations. It’s like an never-ending circle which leads to heartache and frustration.<\/p>\n Al no comunicar lo que queremos que haga nuestra pareja, creamos un gran problema de la nada sin darnos cuenta. Ese problema se hace m\u00e1s y m\u00e1s grande con el tiempo y arrastra consigo todo tipo de otros problemas y cuestiones.<\/p>\n A lot of people, like my friend, and even me, to be honest, just learned this through other people’s examples and fail to realize that unmet expectations can be so devastating.<\/p>\n It’s not fair to expect for your partner to behave the way you want him to, just as it’s not fair for him to assume you will live up to his expectations.<\/p>\n Another funny story about great expectations involves my other friend. She is about to get married and she is attending some premarital seminars with her fianc\u00e9e.<\/p>\n En uno de los seminarios, un coach les pidi\u00f3 que hicieran una lista de todas las cosas que esperan de su pareja una vez casados.<\/p>\n![\"una](\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/a-loving-couple-drinks-coffee-and-talks-seriously.jpg\")
<\/p>\n![\"la](\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/the-woman-writes-something-and-the-man-laughs.jpg\")
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![\"el](\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/a-portrait-of-a-beautiful-thinking-woman.jpg\")
<\/p>\n![\"un](\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/a-man-and-a-woman-sit-at-the-bar-drinking-coffee-and-talking-seriously.jpg\")
<\/p>\n![\"una](\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/a-loving-couple-sitting-on-the-floor-of-the-room-and-talking.jpg\")
<\/p>\n![\"Las](\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/08\/Unmet-Expectations-Are-The-Most-Common-Cause-Of-Broken-Relationships-Pinterest.jpg\")
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