{"id":156396,"date":"2022-07-26T13:10:46","date_gmt":"2022-07-26T13:10:46","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/herway.net\/?p=156396"},"modified":"2023-04-04T09:11:04","modified_gmt":"2023-04-04T09:11:04","slug":"querer-algo-que-no-se-puede-tener","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/querer-algo-que-no-se-puede-tener\/","title":{"rendered":"13 razones psicol\u00f3gicas para desear algo que no se puede tener"},"content":{"rendered":"

Ropa o zapatos demasiado caros.<\/em> Una mujer o un hombre que no est\u00e1 disponible o que est\u00e1 ocupado. Sue\u00f1os demasiado complejos para hacerse realidad.<\/em> Wanting something you can\u2019t have at the moment can be really frustrating.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Tendemos a pasarnos d\u00edas, semanas y meses pensando en una cosa o una persona que queremos en nuestra vida. A veces, nos obsesionamos tanto que descuidamos todas las dem\u00e1s cosas que est\u00e1n sucediendo en este momento.<\/p>\n

Why do we do that? Why do we want what we can\u2019t have?<\/strong><\/p>\n

Hay explicaciones psicol\u00f3gicas para este fen\u00f3meno que son realmente alucinantes. Once you understand the background of your intense desire for things you can\u2019t have, your life will instantly change.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Below you\u2019ll find all the psychological reasons behind wanting something you can\u2019t have and what you can do about it.<\/p>\n

13 Psychological Explanations Of Wanting Something You Can\u2019t Have<\/h2>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Do you think that having that one thing or being with that one person would change your life for the better and make you ultimately happy? Here\u2019s exactly what\u2019s going on in our minds when we want something we can\u2019t have:<\/p>\n

1. La emoci\u00f3n de la persecuci\u00f3n y el chute de dopamina<\/h3>\n

Every time someone you like pays attention to you or texts you, the levels of the hormone dopamine (\u201cthe happy hormone\u201d) immediately increase. You feel excited and on cloud nine.<\/p>\n

Ahora bien, \u00bfsab\u00edas que puedes volverte adicto a este chute de dopamina?<\/strong> It\u2019s like being on drugs.<\/p>\n

Every time you come in contact with the object of your desire (read: your drug), you get a shot of dopamine \u2013 a shot of happiness. As\u00ed que, b\u00e1sicamente, acabas persiguiendo el disparo que supone perseguir a alguien que te gusta.<\/strong><\/p>\n

La emoci\u00f3n de la persecuci\u00f3n tiene el poder de hacerte susceptible a pan rallado<\/a> (cuando alguien te presta la atenci\u00f3n justa, lo que te hace desear m\u00e1s).<\/p>\n

2. Aumento del ego<\/h3>\n

Sometimes, you want what you can\u2019t have because your ego is at play. Now imagine seeing a luxury perfume, car, attractive woman or man.<\/p>\n

En esa situaci\u00f3n, tu ego puede obligarte a comprar esa cosa o a perseguir a esa mujer u hombre porque necesitas alcanzar esa sensaci\u00f3n de satisfacci\u00f3n.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Poder llevar ese perfume, conducir ese coche o estar con esa mujer o ese hombre te subir\u00eda el ego.<\/p>\n

En otras palabras, te sentir\u00edas poderoso, feliz y realizado. That\u2019s exactly what forces you to want and chase something you can\u2019t have.<\/strong><\/p>\n

CONSEJO PROFESIONAL:<\/strong>\u00a0Si tienes esa necesidad incontrolable de sentirte siempre como un ganador, entonces ya sabes que tienes un problema de ego.<\/a><\/p>\n

3. El efecto de escasez<\/h3>\n

The scarcity effect is also one of the culprits for wanting something you can\u2019t have. It works on the following principle: Nos interesan m\u00e1s las cosas raras (escasas) porque, en nuestra mente, tienen m\u00e1s valor.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Here\u2019s one brilliant explanation of the efecto escasez por Psychology Today<\/a>: \u201cScarcity functions like an obstacle to goal pursuit, which intensifies the value of the goal.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Recuerdo cuando ten\u00edamos un huerto con cientos de manzanos. Cuando recog\u00edamos toda la fruta, ten\u00edamos una habitaci\u00f3n entera llena de manzanas. Adivinad.<\/p>\n

I didn\u2019t eat a single one as long as there were so many of them. Despu\u00e9s de venderlas y com\u00e9rnoslas casi todas, de repente me interes\u00e9 por consumir las manzanas.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Hablando del efecto escasez en su m\u00e1xima expresi\u00f3n.<\/p>\n

4. Lucha contra la baja autoestima<\/h3>\n

La baja autoestima puede influir en todos los aspectos de tu vida (especialmente en tu vida amorosa). Puede da\u00f1ar tu salud mental y hacerte sentir frustrado, ansioso e incluso deprimido.<\/p>\n

Mujeres o hombres con poca confianza en s\u00ed mismos<\/a> a menudo piensan que poseer algo valioso y raro les har\u00e1 sentirse mejor consigo mismos.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Est\u00e1n convencidos de que poseer esa \u00fanica cosa o estar con esa \u00fanica persona es la pieza que falta en el puzzle para encontrar su valor.<\/p>\n

As long as they\u2019re pursuing the object of their affection, they feel like there is hope, and their well-being is at stake.<\/p>\n

5. La atracci\u00f3n de lo desconocido<\/h3>\n

Unpredictability, forbidden fruit, unknown scenarios… All these things can influence you to chase something you can\u2019t have.<\/p>\n

Pasas mucho tiempo pensando en c\u00f3mo te sentir\u00edas una vez que hayas comprado el objeto o conquistado a la persona que te gusta.<\/strong> Wanting what you can\u2019t have has never been more frustrating and yet, at the same time, alluring.<\/p>\n

El atractivo de lo desconocido te hace pensar que la hierba es m\u00e1s verde<\/a> en el otro lado.<\/strong><\/p>\n

You\u2019re convinced that all the other people who own what you want are happier and more content in life than you. That\u2019s why you become so focused on pursuing that feeling.<\/p>\n

6. B\u00fasqueda de la autoestima<\/h3>\n

\"mujer<\/p>\n

Feeling like you\u2019re not good enough<\/a> can put you in a state of constant pursuit of self-worth. You want something you can\u2019t have because you want to feel worthy of it.<\/p>\n

El siguiente escenario ocurre en tu cabeza: \u201cIf I manage to earn enough money to buy that one luxury thing or if I manage to win that attractive man or woman, my self-worth will increase.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

Crees que su valor se convertir\u00e1 en el tuyo. Tener el objeto de tu deseo te har\u00e1 sentir digno, poderoso y seguro de ti mismo.<\/p>\n

7. Idealizar el objeto de deseo<\/h3>\n

Cuando idealizas al objeto de tu deseo, b\u00e1sicamente piensas que es perfecto y mucho mejor de lo que es en realidad. En tu cabeza, son EXACTAMENTE lo que necesitas en la vida para sentirte completo.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Mente muy sana<\/a> explains idealization in the following way: \u201cLa idealizaci\u00f3n es un proceso psicol\u00f3gico o mental que consiste en atribuir cualidades excesivamente positivas a otra persona o cosa.<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n

Basically, you want something you can\u2019t have because you\u2019ve idealized that thing or person<\/strong>. You\u2019ve convinced yourself that their value is higher than it really is. That\u2019s exactly what makes you chase after it or them.<\/p>\n

8. La alegr\u00eda de cumplir una fantas\u00eda<\/h3>\n

This is also known as projection. It\u2019s when you spend a considerable amount of time fantasizing about owning that thing or spending time with a certain person.<\/p>\n

Tu mente ha ido tan lejos cuando se trata de crear esas peque\u00f1as im\u00e1genes en tu cabeza de ti bes\u00e1ndoles, cogi\u00e9ndoles de la mano, abraz\u00e1ndoles, viajando con ellos<\/strong> (if we\u2019re talking about a person).<\/p>\n

\u201cI want what I can\u2019t have because I want my fantasy to be fulfilled.\u201d<\/p>\n

9. Cuanto m\u00e1s inalcanzables son, m\u00e1s te interesas por ellos.<\/h3>\n

Sadly, we often categorize those who are unreachable as highly valuable. Here\u2019s my real-life personal example of this:<\/p>\n

Persegu\u00eda a un tipo que no estaba disponible emocionalmente y, por lo tanto, era inalcanzable.<\/strong> The less he texted me, the more invested I became and determined to “make him reachable.\u201d<\/p>\n

Mientras lo hac\u00eda, ignoraba a todos los chicos buenos que en realidad eran m\u00e1s valiosos que \u00e9l. Lecci\u00f3n aprendida, segu\u00ed adelante.<\/p>\n

Lo que quiero que recuerdes es que el valor percibido del objeto de tu deseo est\u00e1 todo en tu cabeza.<\/strong> Tambi\u00e9n puede ser valiosos consejos sobre relaciones<\/a> tambi\u00e9n.<\/p>\n

10. B\u00fasqueda de validaci\u00f3n<\/h3>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Why do you want what you can\u2019t have? Because b\u00fasqueda de validaci\u00f3n<\/a> te obliga a perseguir cosas y personas que te hagan sentir validado.<\/p>\n

Here\u2019s a simple example of this: A smart, beautiful, attractive woman or man is playing hard to get with you. Lo consideras un signo de gran valor y est\u00e1s totalmente decidido a perseguirlos.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Al cabo de un tiempo, tienes una primera cita, una segunda, y as\u00ed sucesivamente. Poco a poco, empiezas a conquistarlos y te sientes mejor que nunca. \u00bfPor qu\u00e9?<\/p>\n

Porque al aceptar tener una cita contigo, te hicieron sentir validada.<\/strong> Te hac\u00edan sentir mejor contigo mismo porque te aceptaban.<\/p>\n

Now let\u2019s go back to the beginning of this story. You want something you can\u2019t have because having it or being with them will make you feel validated.<\/p>\n

11. Mayor concentraci\u00f3n<\/h3>\n

When someone tells you that you can\u2019t have something, do you instantly want it even more? Of course, you do. El ser humano est\u00e1 programado para desear cosas que son escasas o, en cierto modo, prohibidas.<\/strong><\/p>\n

That\u2019s where heightened focus comes into the story. This basically means that you\u2019ll spend more time thinking of something or someone you can\u2019t have than about anything else.<\/p>\n

The more you think about it, the more you\u2019ll become \u201cobsessed\u201d with it<\/strong>. Perhaps you have no idea why you even want that thing or person. You just want it because you can\u2019t have it.<\/p>\n

I know it sounds ridiculous, but it\u2019s totally true.<\/strong> The same thing applies to reverse psychology. If you want to make someone do something, just tell them they can\u2019t or shouldn\u2019t do it.<\/p>\n

12. Sentirse amenazado<\/h3>\n

Due to all the fantasizing about the object of your desire, you enter a state of feeling threatened about losing it. Wait, but how can you lose something or someone you don\u2019t even have?<\/p>\n

Bueno, en tu mente, existen. Est\u00e1n contigo 24 horas al d\u00eda, 7 d\u00edas a la semana, porque pasas mucho tiempo pensando en ella o en ellos.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Te recuerdas a menudo que otra persona pudo comprar esa cosa antes que t\u00fa, o que otra persona pudo seducir a ese chico o chica antes que t\u00fa.<\/p>\n

The more threatened you feel, the more you want what you can\u2019t have.<\/strong> It\u2019s really impressive how our brain can play tricks on us.<\/p>\n

13. La b\u00fasqueda de la felicidad<\/h3>\n

One of the reasons you always want what you can\u2019t have is that you\u2019re pursuing happiness. You\u2019ve convinced yourself that the source of your happiness is connected with the thing or person you\u2019re interested in.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Olvidas que la felicidad es una elecci\u00f3n<\/a>. Once you stop pursuing things or people you can\u2019t have, you\u2019ll find happiness. Pursuing something you can\u2019t have can\u2019t guarantee that you\u2019ll be happy once you achieve it.<\/p>\n

After that, you\u2019ll find another thing or another person that you would want to pursue again.<\/strong> The only person who can make you happy is YOU. So, stop looking for happiness in things or people you can\u2019t have.<\/p>\n

What Do You Do When You Want Something You Can’t Have?<\/h2>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Do you go out of your way to own that thing or attract that person? Do you lose yourself only to pursue something you can\u2019t have? Here\u2019s what you should do when you find yourself wanting something you can\u2019t have:<\/p>\n

\u2022 Question the emotions that drive you<\/h3>\n

Why do you want something or someone you can\u2019t have? Do you think they would boost your self-esteem and make you feel more content in life? Do you wish to fulfill a fantasy?<\/em><\/p>\n

Question the emotions that drive you. Don\u2019t just fall into the trap of wanting and desiring something you can\u2019t have.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Desiring things you don\u2019t need in life means wasting your time. Unrequited love leads to inevitable heartbreak.<\/p>\n

Aqu\u00ed puedes elegir.<\/p>\n

Puedes decidir no perseguir tus deseos si te afectan negativamente.<\/strong> Por supuesto, lo que sientes es real<\/a>, but don\u2019t let it become an everyday obsession. You deserve better than that.<\/p>\n

\u2022 Remove society\u2019s pressure and unrealistic expectations<\/h3>\n

Nuestros familiares, amigos o la sociedad nos presionan a menudo para que creamos que tenemos que comportarnos de determinadas maneras. When we add unrealistic expectations to this, we\u2019ve got a recipe for ultimate unhappiness.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Sin expectativas = sin decepciones.<\/a> Elimine la presi\u00f3n de la sociedad y c\u00e9ntrese en lo que USTED<\/strong> realmente necesita y quiere en la vida.<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t buy things just because others are advertising them. Don\u2019t feel pressured to date others because society and those closest to you are frightening you into thinking that you\u2019ll be single forever.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Piensa en lo que quieres en la vida y sigue tu instinto. Apaga todas las presiones y expectativas de los dem\u00e1s.<\/p>\n

\u2022 Practice gratitude<\/h3>\n

The reason we want things and people we can\u2019t have is that we often think we lack something in our lives.<\/p>\n

Practicar la gratitud te ayudar\u00e1 a darte cuenta de que ya tienes muchas cosas por las que estar agradecido.<\/p>\n

Once you realize how blessed you truly are, you\u2019ll be less inclined to want something you can\u2019t have.<\/strong> You\u2019ll focus on cherishing the people and things you already have in your life.<\/p>\n

Cuando empec\u00e9 practicar la gratitud<\/a>, for the first time in my life, I was surrounded by this veil of positive energy. The more I practiced it, the more complete I felt. I bet you\u2019ll feel the same way!<\/p>\n

\u2022 Keep a diary<\/h3>\n

Writing down your thoughts daily is a brilliant way to keep track of your mindset. Write down how you feel, what you\u2019re grateful for, and whatever comes to mind.<\/p>\n

By doing this, you\u2019ll be more in control of your actions. You will not let your mind wander and<\/strong> fantasize about things you can\u2019t have.<\/strong><\/p>\n

You\u2019ll be more \u201cin the moment,\u201d which is essential if you want to get rid of that burden of wanting something you can\u2019t have.<\/p>\n

\u2022 Limit your time spent on social media<\/h3>\n

I\u2019m convinced that every single person on earth needs a desintoxicaci\u00f3n de las redes sociales<\/a> once in a while. Limiting the time spent on social media will limit the time you\u2019re exposed to things you might want but can\u2019t have.<\/p>\n

Here\u2019s one of my most recent examples:<\/strong> When I started following one online clothing store, I felt bombarded with all those beautiful summer dresses, skirts, cool T-shirts… Every time they posted something new, I immediately thought, \u201cI need that thing!\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

Deep down in my heart, I knew that I couldn\u2019t buy all those things, and that\u2019s why I wanted them even more. \u00bfSabes lo que hice?<\/strong> I unfollowed the store, and now I\u2019m living happily and peacefully.<\/p>\n

I hope my story inspired you to limit your time spent on social media or at least to unfollow the sites that make you want something you can\u2019t have.<\/p>\n

\u2022 Cultivate self-love<\/h3>\n

When you want something you can\u2019t have, this is often connected with a lack of self-love. In a nutshell, you\u2019re looking for things and people who will make you feel better and happier.<\/p>\n

Esto nunca ocurre. La \u00fanica forma segura de alcanzar la felicidad es a trav\u00e9s de aumentar el amor propio<\/a>Pasar tiempo con sus seres queridos y trabajar en s\u00ed mismo.<\/strong><\/p>\n

En lugar de buscar cosas o personas que te completen, compl\u00e9tate a ti mismo.<\/p>\n

Instead Of Wanting Something You Can\u2019t Have, Focus On What\u2019s Good For You.<\/h2>\n

Wanting something you can\u2019t have can be overcome if you\u2019re really determined and willing. The easiest way to fight these tiring feelings of desiring things and people you can\u2019t have is by focusing on what\u2019s good for you.<\/p>\n

\u00bfQu\u00e9 cosas y qui\u00e9nes son las personas que a\u00f1aden valor real a tu vida?<\/strong><\/p>\n

Don\u2019t just want something because you can\u2019t have it. Want something because it\u2019s good for you.<\/em><\/p>\n

That\u2019s the secret to true happiness and ser libre<\/a> de tus propios deseos.<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n

\"13<\/figure>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Clothes or shoes that are too expensive. A woman or a man who is unavailable or taken. Dreams that are too complex to become a reality. Wanting something you can\u2019t have at the moment can be really frustrating. We tend to spend days, weeks, and months thinking about a thing or a person we want…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":20,"featured_media":156400,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29636],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-156396","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-self-help"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29636,"label":"self help"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/07\/13-Psychological-Reasons-Behind-Wanting-Something-You-Cant-Have-1024x683.jpg",1024,683,true],"author_info":{"display_name":"Christine Keller","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/author\/christine\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29636,"name":"self help","slug":"self-help","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29636,"taxonomy":"category","description":"Whenever you feel lost or hurt in love and life, these self-help tips will help you overcome challenges and make you feel better instantly.","parent":22911,"count":316,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29636,"category_count":316,"category_description":"Whenever you feel lost or hurt in love and life, these self-help tips will help you overcome challenges and make you feel better instantly.","cat_name":"self help","category_nicename":"self-help","category_parent":22911}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/156396","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/20"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=156396"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/156396\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/156400"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=156396"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=156396"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=156396"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}