{"id":157485,"date":"2022-09-01T05:09:55","date_gmt":"2022-09-01T05:09:55","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/herway.net\/?p=157485"},"modified":"2022-12-01T11:43:40","modified_gmt":"2022-12-01T11:43:40","slug":"ghosting-despues-de-la-primera-cita-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/ghosting-despues-de-la-primera-cita-2\/","title":{"rendered":"Ghosting despu\u00e9s de la primera cita: Por qu\u00e9 ocurre y c\u00f3mo afrontarlo"},"content":{"rendered":"

Que te fantasmeen es terrible. Te quedas con un mont\u00f3n de signos de interrogaci\u00f3n sobre la cabeza y sin respuestas a la vista.<\/strong><\/p>\n

But you know what\u2019s even worse? Ghosting after first date!<\/strong><\/p>\n

Te pareci\u00f3 una primera cita estupenda y estabas deseando volver a verles. Y estabas convencido de que ellos pensaban lo mismo.<\/p>\n

However, after sending them a couple of texts, all you got was silence. Was it really that bad? And why didn\u2019t they tell you they didn\u2019t like you?<\/p>\n

\u00bfPor qu\u00e9 la gente deja fantasmas a otras personas? Y \u00bfcu\u00e1l es la mejor manera de manejar el ghosting?<\/p>\n

Siga leyendo para descubrirlo.<\/p>\n

Ghosting despu\u00e9s de la primera cita: 12 razones por las que ocurre<\/h2>\n

\"mujer<\/p>\n

I wasn\u2019t present on your date, so I can\u2019t give you a clear answer to why you got ghosted. But what I can offer are 12 common reasons why ghosting happens.<\/p>\n

1. Son infieles<\/h3>\n

The first possible reason why ghosting after first date happens is that you\u2019re the otra mujer<\/a> o el otro hombre. Por supuesto, no tienes ni idea de que tu cita ya est\u00e1 casada o comprometida. Han intentado enga\u00f1arte y te han dicho que est\u00e1n solteros y dispuestos a mezclarse.<\/p>\n

However, the truth is that they tried to cheat on their primary partner with you. Of course, they didn\u2019t want to be honest about their relationship status until they were sure you\u2019d fallen for them.<\/p>\n

Lo intentaron, pero fracasaron. \u00bfPor qu\u00e9 desaparecieron?<\/strong><\/p>\n

Well, maybe they got caught and are dealing with this huge drama back at home. In that case, you\u2019re the last thing on their mind.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Or they just realized you wouldn\u2019t be the best affair partner in the world. They came to the conclusion that you wouldn\u2019t provide them with the secrecy they need or just that you wouldn\u2019t agree to be the third person.<\/p>\n

2. They didn\u2019t like your looks<\/h3>\n

This is a hard pill to swallow, but maybe they ghosted you because they didn\u2019t like your appearance. This usually happens when you meet someone for the first time in person after a lot of online dating.<\/p>\n

If you two matched on a dating app or just talked on social media\u2014 it is possible that they didn\u2019t like what they saw when you two went out on a date.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Don\u2019t get me wrong\u2014 I\u2019m not saying that you don\u2019t look similar on social media and in real life. But the truth is that we\u2019re all more attractive on our dating app profiles.<\/p>\n

No, this doesn\u2019t necessarily mean that you\u2019re unattractive. You\u2019re just not their type, or they think that you two wouldn\u2019t make it a good couple physically. Don\u2019t take it personally, and don\u2019t let something like this ruin your self-esteem.<\/p>\n

3. They weren\u2019t into your personality<\/h3>\n

Or maybe they simply didn\u2019t like your personality? It doesn\u2019t mean you displayed any bad behavior, and you might think that you two had a great first date.<\/p>\n

However, the other person clearly doesn\u2019t see you two as compatible. It certainly doesn\u2019t mean that you don\u2019t have some amazing traits and qualities.<\/strong><\/p>\n

E incluso si realmente era un buena cita<\/a>...algo de tu personaje los desanim\u00f3.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Yes, I know what you must be thinking. It would be hell easier if they could tell you what’s wrong, so you don\u2019t repeat your mistakes.<\/p>\n

But that\u2019s exactly why people ghost\u2014 so they don\u2019t have to explain themselves.<\/p>\n

4. Les intimidas<\/h3>\n

Suele ser uno de los principales razones por las que los hombres fantasmean a las mujeres<\/a> despu\u00e9s de una buena primera cita: se acobardan. Os conocisteis y todo iba genial hasta que al d\u00eda siguiente se despert\u00f3 y se dio cuenta de que t\u00fa ten\u00edas m\u00e1s \u00e9xito que \u00e9l.<\/p>\n

Or maybe you are more attractive, make more money or just have a better place in the social hierarchy. Either way, this guy came to the conclusion that you\u2019re out of his league. He is \u00a1intimidado por ti!<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n

He can\u2019t handle it and being next to you is destroying his self-esteem. But naturally, he won\u2019t tell you that you\u2019re too much for him\u2014 or to put things this way, that he\u2019s too little for you.<\/p>\n

Instead, you\u2019ll just get radio silence. No phone calls, no text messages, nothing.<\/p>\n

De este modo, tiene la oportunidad de sentirse mejor consigo mismo y restaurar su destruido ego.<\/p>\n

5. Volvieron con su ex<\/h3>\n

Here\u2019s another common reason for ghosting after first date: the other person is in a long-term relationship. Actually, let\u2019s put things right: t\u00e9cnicamente hab\u00edan roto (o se estaban tomando un descanso) cuando tuvisteis una cita.<\/strong><\/p>\n

The person who ghosted you was single at the time of your date. But they were emotionally unavailable\u2014 that\u2019s for sure.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Quiz\u00e1 buscaban vengarse de su ex. O te vieron como una oportunidad perfecta para una relaci\u00f3n de rebote.<\/p>\n

De cualquier manera, el punto es que funcion\u00f3. Volvieron con su ex y se olvidaron de tu existencia.<\/p>\n

Mala suerte, lo s\u00e9. Pero oye, \u00a1suerte que pas\u00f3 enseguida!<\/p>\n

6. S\u00f3lo quer\u00edan echar un polvo<\/h3>\n

So, you two met on Tinder, Hinge, or some other dating app. Or they approached you in person\u2014 it doesn\u2019t really matter.<\/p>\n

The point is the same: they had only one thing in mind\u2014 they planned on llevarte a la cama.<\/a> Of course, they didn\u2019t have the decency or the courage to propose casual sex upfront.<\/strong><\/p>\n

So, they probably sent you a bunch of romantic text messages and lied that they wanted something serious. Sadly, you didn\u2019t notice the red flags, and you fell right into their trap.<\/p>\n

But when you finally went out on a date, they noticed that you two clearly don\u2019t want the same things. You\u2019re not into anything casual, and you\u2019re looking for real love.<\/p>\n

Desde su punto de vista, en este caso, fantasmear a alguien parece mejor que decirle tus verdaderas intenciones.<\/p>\n

7. You\u2019ve been catfished<\/h3>\n

When you think of catfishing, I know what comes to your mind. You think of a fake Tinder, Hinge, or social media account. We all know the drill: they take someone else\u2019s photos and information and trick you into going out with them or just texting them.<\/p>\n

But you two already had your first date. You\u2019ve met this person who ghosted you, and they really do look the same as in their photos.<\/p>\n

No obstante, pueden seguir haci\u00e9ndote catfishing. Is it possible that they\u2019ve given you false information about themselves?<\/strong><\/p>\n

Maybe you\u2019ve gotten their real name, and that\u2019s about it. They lied about their age, job, and everything else.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Now, they\u2019ve realized that they\u2019re playing with fire. They could get caught easily, and that\u2019s why they chose to disappear.<\/p>\n

8. They don\u2019t want to hurt your feelings<\/h3>\n

\"dos<\/p>\n

Ghosting someone is awful, toxic, and disrespectful\u2014 nobody can question that. And even though I\u2019m not here to defend your ghoster, let\u2019s try looking at things from their perspective.<\/p>\n

They didn\u2019t do the right thing, and I\u2019m not trying to argue against that. But that doesn\u2019t automatically make them an insensible jerk.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Maybe they didn\u2019t tell you the real reasons why they don\u2019t like it because they didn\u2019t want to hurt your feelings. I know that this is not the way to do it, but it\u2019s the way they chose.<\/strong><\/p>\n

At the end of the day, it\u2019s easier for you to be angry at them and to see them as an asshole who didn\u2019t have the decency to send you a Volver al texto<\/a> than to hear them tell you they don\u2019t like you.<\/p>\n

Once again, no dating coach will tell you that their logic resonates with common sense. But it is what goes through a lot of people\u2019s minds when they decide to ghost someone.<\/p>\n

9. Conocieron a otra persona<\/h3>\n

A lot of people engage in the act of ghosting after first date simply because they meet someone new before the second date with you. In this case, they won\u2019t ghost you right away.<\/p>\n

Instead, you\u2019ll be getting phone calls and a text back every once in a while, like everything is in perfect order. But all of a sudden, you\u2019ll notice they start making excuses when you ask them when you\u2019ll meet up for the next date.<\/p>\n

Isn\u2019t it obvious that they\u2019ve lost interest in the meantime? And the only reason that could happen is that someone who captured their attention entered their life.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Please, don\u2019t compare yourself to this new person. Don\u2019t go through their social media, looking for clues about someone new. It\u2019s their choice, and you should respect it.<\/p>\n

10. You\u2019ve given them the ick<\/h3>\n

Ya sabes lo que significa tener asco, \u00bfverdad? Ocurre incluso en las relaciones duraderas, cuando amas a tu pareja hasta la luna.<\/p>\n

Y, de repente, hacen algo que te asquea por completo. No es l\u00f3gico y, en la mayor\u00eda de los casos, no tiene ning\u00fan sentido. <\/strong>Sin embargo, esa cosa que dicen o hacen te da la el mayor rechazo jam\u00e1s visto<\/a>y no hay mucho que puedas hacer al respecto.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Well, I\u2019m sorry to break it to you, but you\u2019re the one who\u2019s given the other person the ick. You did something you\u2019re not even aware of, and that killed all the attraction this person felt for you.<\/p>\n

Why didn\u2019t they say anything? Well, deep down, they know they\u2019re being irrational.<\/p>\n

I mean, you can\u2019t say to someone you don\u2019t want to see them anymore because of the way they ate their spaghetti. Well, technically, you can, but you\u2019ll look like a lunatic. So, they choose radio silence instead.<\/p>\n

11. They don\u2019t care about your feelings<\/h3>\n

We\u2019ve already talked about ghosters who ghost you because they don\u2019t want to break your heart. Well, those are the good ones.<\/p>\n

On the other hand, there are those who don\u2019t give a damn about your emotions. And that\u2019s one of the reasons for ghosting after first date.<\/strong><\/p>\n

They don\u2019t care about the way their disappearance made you feel. They don\u2019t care whether you\u2019ll wonder what to do when you don\u2019t get a text back<\/a>, what went wrong; if you\u2019ll blame yourself, and how this will affect your self-esteem, insecurities, or love life in the future.<\/p>\n

They just see this as the easier way out of this uncomfortable situation they\u2019ve gotten themselves into.<\/p>\n

12. Tienen mucho que hacer<\/h3>\n

Finally, one of the reasons for someone ghosting after first date might not have anything to do with you or with your romantic connection at all. In fact, maybe you didn\u2019t get ghosted in the first place.<\/p>\n

Well, technically, they did disappear. So, let me rephrase this: maybe they didn\u2019t have the intention of ghosting you in the first place.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s just that your date has a lot going on in their life. Maybe they\u2019re going through a family emergency or having a work crisis. Maybe their loved one passed away, or they ended up in hospital.<\/strong><\/p>\n

I know what you must think right now: no matter what happened, there is no way they didn\u2019t have enough time to send a text back. And you would be absolutely right\u2014 if you two were in a long-term relationship.<\/p>\n

However, you have to remember one thing: you went out on one great first date only. So the last thing they want is to bother you with their personal issues. Besides, truth be told, I don\u2019t think you\u2019re even crossing their mind right now.<\/p>\n

V\u00e9ase tambi\u00e9n: \u00bfTe mand\u00f3 un mensaje despu\u00e9s de la primera cita, pero no desde entonces? Esto es lo que pasa<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n

Ghosting despu\u00e9s de la primera cita: c\u00f3mo manejarlo<\/h2>\n

\"mujer<\/p>\n

Aqu\u00ed tiene una gu\u00eda detallada paso a paso sobre c\u00f3mo lidiar con el ghosting:<\/a><\/p>\n

1. Don\u2019t blame yourself<\/h3>\n

Lo peor que puedes hacer es culparte por el acto de ghosting despu\u00e9s de la primera cita.<\/p>\n

\u00bfHe sido lo bastante bueno? \u00bfHice algo para ahuyentarlos?<\/p>\n

Could I have done something to prevent this from happening? Should I have dressed differently? Was it my perfume that they didn\u2019t like?<\/p>\n

\u00bfEra mi forma de re\u00edr? \u00bfLa forma en que hablaba?<\/p>\n

What if I didn\u2019t send that text? Would things have turned out differently? Or maybe I should have texted them more?<\/p>\n

These are all the questions going through your head when dealing with a ghoster. But guess what: it\u2019s all pointless.<\/p>\n

Tienen sus razones para actuar as\u00ed, y probablemente no podr\u00edas haber hecho nada para evitarlo. Adem\u00e1s, lo hecho, hecho est\u00e1. <\/strong>You can\u2019t go back in time, can you now?<\/strong><\/p>\n

2. Accept that you won\u2019t get closure<\/h3>\n

The truth is that you\u2019ll never find the real reasons why you got ghosted. You can only guess and accept one of the reasons listed above, but you\u2019ll never get real confirmation from the other person.<\/p>\n

And whether you like it or not, you\u2019ll never obtener el cierre<\/a> you\u2019re craving. You\u2019ll never find out what happened, and you just have to live with it.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Stop looking for closure. I know that you want it, but you ain\u2019t getting it. and that\u2019s the reality you must accept.<\/p>\n

3. Don\u2019t text or call them<\/h3>\n

So this should be common sense, but I\u2019ll emphasize it anyway. En ning\u00fan caso est\u00e1 prohibido que te pongas en contacto con tu cita de esta u otra manera.<\/strong><\/p>\n

This includes text messages, phone calls, social media DMs, and everything else. If you do any of this, you\u2019ll only appear desperate. Yes, you feel desperate. I know that, but your date doesn\u2019t have to<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t get me wrong\u2014 I\u2019m not saying that you\u2019re not allowed to contact them right away. It\u2019s okay if you send them one text a few days after your date.<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t accuse them of anything, and don\u2019t think of begging them for a reply. Just act casual and careless.<\/p>\n

Ask them if everything is okay and tell them that you were wondering what they\u2019ve been up to. You can also mention a second date in this text.<\/p>\n

However, if you don\u2019t get a reply at that point, everything is clear. Any message after that would smell like desperation.<\/p>\n

4. Corta con esta persona<\/h3>\n

Nevertheless, not texting and calling your ghoster won\u2019t be enough. It would be best if you could cut them off your life for good.<\/p>\n

I know what you must be thinking right now. If you unfollow them on social media, they\u2019ll get the impression that you\u2019re offended.<\/p>\n

Well, you are. And with full right to be! You don\u2019t tolerate disrespect, and you\u2019re not scared to make it very clear.<\/p>\n

Por lo tanto, el siguiente paso es bloquear su n\u00famero, eliminar su amistad en todas las redes sociales y evitar todo contacto con ellos.<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00bfPor qu\u00e9 es necesario? Lo \u00faltimo que quieres es que esa persona tenga acceso a ti en el futuro.<\/p>\n

Tienes que saber una cosa: \u00a1los fantasmas siempre intentan volver!<\/a><\/p>\n

Who knows? Maybe they\u2019ll remember you the next time they are lonely, or they break up with their long-term partner. They\u2019ll enviarte un mensaje<\/a> o llamarte por tel\u00e9fono cuando menos te lo esperas.<\/p>\n

Sabes c\u00f3mo haz que se arrepientan de haberte fantasmeado<\/a>? Don\u2019t give them a chance to reach out to you whenever they want. And don\u2019t put yourself in the temptation to text them back.<\/p>\n

Besides, they\u2019re immature and disrespectful. And that is not the type of person you want near you.<\/p>\n

5. Centrarse en uno mismo<\/h3>\n

En lugar de pensar demasiado en toda esta situaci\u00f3n, la mejor manera de curarse es c\u00e9ntrate en ti mismo<\/a>. Lo que pas\u00f3 es pasado, y debes centrarte en el presente y en el futuro.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Don\u2019t worry, this won\u2019t become a pattern. It certainly doesn\u2019t mean that you\u2019ll get ghosted the next time you go out on a date with someone.<\/p>\n

Pero puedes verlo como una oportunidad para progresar. Convi\u00e9rtete en material de novio\/novia, y la mejor manera de hacerlo es qui\u00e9rete a ti mismo<\/a> m\u00e1s que nunca.<\/p>\n

\u00bfCu\u00e1nto tiempo pasa antes de que cuente como ghosting?<\/h2>\n

\"hombre<\/p>\n

En primer lugar, tienes que estar seguro de que el acto de ghosting despu\u00e9s de la primera cita ha tenido lugar. Cu\u00e1nto tiempo ha pasado desde la \u00faltima vez que se pusieron en contacto?<\/p>\n

It doesn\u2019t count as ghosting if they didn\u2019t return your phone call the very next day.<\/strong> Yes, it\u2019s rude, and they\u2019re probably playing hot and cold mind games. However, it is not ghosting.<\/p>\n

Por otro lado, if you haven\u2019t heard from them in more than three days\u2014 you\u2019ve been ghosted.<\/strong> Siempre que haya intentado ponerse en contacto pero no haya obtenido respuesta.<\/p>\n

Yes, you can give them the benefit of the doubt and wait a whole week, but at that point, the reality is that they\u2019re a ghoster.<\/p>\n

\u00bfDebo enviar primero un mensaje de texto despu\u00e9s de que me env\u00eden un mensaje fantasma?<\/h2>\n

Todos los entrenadores de citas te dir\u00e1n lo mismo: don\u2019t text first after being ghosted. Their silent treatment is respuesta suficiente<\/a>.<\/strong><\/p>\n

You\u2019ve sent a couple of texts after your date. You\u2019ve even invited them to meet up again. And you got no reply.<\/p>\n

I know you want to express your anger and pain. You want to insult them, call them names, or you\u2019ve come up with a witty respuesta fantasma<\/a> que podr\u00eda inspirarles a devolverte el mensaje.<\/p>\n

But what would be the point of it? This person clearly doesn\u2019t want to continue your romance (which hasn\u2019t even started in the first place), and you should accept their decision with dignity.<\/p>\n

What about the fact that they never had the dignity to tell you that in person? Well, that\u2019s their problem.<\/p>\n

Para terminar:<\/h2>\n

Now you know one crucial thing: ghosting after first date happens, but it\u2019s not the end of the world\u2014 that is, unless you decide to see it that way.<\/p>\n

S\u00e9 que ves esto como la peor experiencia posible que has tenido. Quiero decir, \u00bfa qui\u00e9n le gusta que le fantasmeen?<\/strong><\/p>\n

But instead of seeing it as a curse, try seeing it as a blessing in disguise. You\u2019ve managed to get rid of someone who was never worthy of your time, energy, or effort.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Y todo lo que tuviste que desperdiciar fue una cita. \u00bfC\u00f3mo te sentir\u00edas si desapareci\u00f3 de tu vida despu\u00e9s de a\u00f1os<\/a> \u00bfpasados juntos? Eso tambi\u00e9n pasa. Y duele mucho m\u00e1s.<\/p>\n

Most importantly, I advise you to see this as a lesson. Yes, there are some bad people out there. People who don\u2019t give a damn about the hearts they break along the way.<\/p>\n

People who don\u2019t have the decency to say goodbye or to tell you the real reason why they\u2019re leaving. But you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you get to your Prince or Princess.<\/p>\n

Now you know what it is that you don\u2019t want. Moreover, you know who you never want to become.<\/p>\n

\"Ghosting<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Getting ghosted feels terrible. You\u2019re left with a bunch of question marks above your head and without any answers in sight. But you know what\u2019s even worse? Ghosting after first date! You thought it was a great first date, and you were looking forward to seeing them again. And you were convinced they felt the…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":25,"featured_media":157516,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29622],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-157485","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-relationship-advice"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29622,"label":"relationship advice"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/09\/Ghosting-After-First-Date-Why-It-Happens-And-How-To-Handle-It-1024x683.jpg",1024,683,true],"author_info":{"display_name":"Amy Nicholson","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/author\/amy\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29622,"name":"relationship advice","slug":"relationship-advice","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29622,"taxonomy":"category","description":"Making all aspects of your relationship work is one of the biggest challenges. Here, you can find advice for most of the issues you might encounter. ","parent":29620,"count":544,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29622,"category_count":544,"category_description":"Making all aspects of your relationship work is one of the biggest challenges. Here, you can find advice for most of the issues you might encounter. ","cat_name":"relationship advice","category_nicename":"relationship-advice","category_parent":29620}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/157485","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/25"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=157485"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/157485\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/157516"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=157485"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=157485"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=157485"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}