{"id":165592,"date":"2024-06-14T10:48:26","date_gmt":"2024-06-14T10:48:26","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/herway.net\/?p=165592"},"modified":"2024-06-14T10:48:26","modified_gmt":"2024-06-14T10:48:26","slug":"amigos-despues-de-la-ruptura","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/amigos-despues-de-la-ruptura\/","title":{"rendered":"\u00bfCu\u00e1ndo deber\u00edais seguir siendo amigos despu\u00e9s de la ruptura (pero sin beneficios)?"},"content":{"rendered":"

Era mi amante, mi mejor amigo, mi hogar y el mundo entero para m\u00ed. Luego se mud\u00f3 a California por trabajo y la relaci\u00f3n a distancia nos pas\u00f3 factura, as\u00ed que rompimos.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Al principio, estaba completamente destrozado, como si un enorme trozo de tejido fuera arrancado violentamente de mi cuerpo.<\/strong> Apenas pod\u00eda andar. Tem\u00eda romperme en pedazos y quedarme esparcido en medio de la calle.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00c9l fue el primero en pasar p\u00e1gina, encontr\u00f3 novia al cabo de unos meses y luego me mand\u00f3 un mensaje:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2013 \u201cCan we stay friends?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow can we be friends after all?\u201d<\/em><\/h2>\n\n\n
\n
\"mujer<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n

If you\u2019ve broken up recently, you probably feel the same, torn between a plausible idea of keeping him in your life and the urge to forget about the past and move on.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Despu\u00e9s de separaros, el primer reto es acostumbrarse a no verle ni o\u00edrle todos los d\u00edas. Someone who had a very important role in your life suddenly isn\u2019t there anymore,<\/strong> y le echas de menos como un loco.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s like an addiction and you need to detoxify yourself from it, or a chemical attraction that needs to fade to allow you to get rid of the habit. There is an enorme agujero en tu vida que necesita ser llenado con un nuevo significado.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Me siento desesperado, quieres conservar la sensaci\u00f3n de seguridad emocional<\/strong> que tu relaci\u00f3n te ha estado dando, y crees que la amistad es una forma estupenda de hacerlo.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But why can’t we be friends after the breakup?<\/em> you’ll probably ask. Well, to tell you the truth, you can, but not right after the separation. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Primero necesitas un desfase temporal. After a dark night of the soul, you\u2019ll need to reclaim yourself<\/strong>, put together your broken pieces, meet new people, and find new joys. When you fill the emptiness you\u2019ll feel better and then it might be the right time to give it a try.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A veces la amistad podr\u00eda ser una forma de encontrar un cierre, pero debes tener cuidado. Los dos ten\u00e9is que estar en la misma p\u00e1gina y quieren mantener relaciones amistosas sin ning\u00fan tipo de carga emocional.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Also, make sure you\u2019re not trying to stay friends hoping you\u2019ll get him back. No secret agenda please, when it\u2019s over it\u2019s over.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Si intentas ser su amiga justo despu\u00e9s de romper, sin dejar que tus sentimientos se enfr\u00eden, you may fool yourself into thinking that it\u2019s not over yet.<\/strong> You\u2019ll live in a false hope and that will prevent you from moving on and giving a chance to someone new.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

La amistad tras la ruptura me ayud\u00f3 a amortizar el dolor<\/h2>\n\n\n
\n
\"primer<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n

Mi ex me explic\u00f3 la idea:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2013 \u201cI still can\u2019t see you only as a friend but I hope you can stay in my life in some way. If you want that too! I care to know you\u2019re well. We might never see each other again but we can keep in touch even when we have different lives.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

I couldn\u2019t decide if I wanted to stay in touch. I was afraid it would be even more painful to recover and impossible to forget him. On the other hand, I couldn\u2019t let us become strangers. Necesitaba saber c\u00f3mo estaba.<\/strong> Me importaba su vida.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

As\u00ed que seguimos envi\u00e1ndonos mensajes de vez en cuando, pero con el tiempo nos distanciamos m\u00e1s.<\/strong> Lo super\u00e9, conoc\u00ed a alguien nuevo y volv\u00ed a enamorarme.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Aunque seguir siendo amiga de mi ex me ayud\u00f3 a amortizar el dolor<\/strong> and allowed us to reinvent our relationship in a new platonic way, I don\u2019t believe it\u2019s always a good choice.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When is friendship a good idea and when isn\u2019t?<\/h2>\n\n\n
\n
\"pareja<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n

Por lo tanto, puede ser una buena idea seguir siendo amigo de tu ex cuando lo decid\u00e1is sincera y mutuamente, y cuando haya pasado el tiempo suficiente. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

You\u2019ll also need to be honest with yourself. Why do you really want to keep him in your life as a friend? Are you emotionally capable of handling his new role?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Porque esta amistad ser\u00e1 muy diferente de la que ten\u00edais como pareja. <\/strong>You\u2019ll tell yourself you just want to know how he’s doing, but some news might upset you. When he told me he had a girlfriend I was devastated and had a hard time accepting it. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

When you\u2019re fully recovered and if he\u2019s open to it, try nurturing friendship. Don\u2019t start a friendship before you\u2019re done putting back all the pieces of your broken heart.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Aseg\u00farate de establecer l\u00edmites y trazar las l\u00edneas que no se deben cruzar. Just friends. Without \u201cthe benefits.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00bfY si te hubiera hecho mucho da\u00f1o? \u00bfPor qu\u00e9 querr\u00edas ser amiga de alguien que te ha tratado mal? Don\u2019t stay friends with a toxic man who abused you in some way. <\/strong>Adem\u00e1s, si fue infiel y desleal. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Seguir siendo amigos cuando todav\u00eda sientes algo por \u00e9l tambi\u00e9n es una mala idea. Don\u2019t hope a friendship will help you get him back. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don\u2019t try to assure him you\u2019re well off without him. Pasa p\u00e1gina y empieza un nuevo cap\u00edtulo en tu vida. <\/strong>\u00c9l puede estar ah\u00ed para apoyarte como debe hacer un verdadero amigo, pero t\u00fa debes centrarte en las oportunidades de una relaci\u00f3n futura. <\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

He was my lover, my best friend, my home, and the whole world to me. Then he moved to California for work and the long-distance relationship took a toll on us so we broke up. At first, I was completely shattered, as if a huge piece of tissue was violently removed from my body. I…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":13,"featured_media":165595,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29628],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-165592","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-dealing-with-breakup"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29628,"label":"dealing with breakup"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/06\/When-Should-You-Stay-Friends-After-The-Breakup-But-Without-Benefits-1024x678.jpg",1024,678,true],"author_info":{"display_name":"April Callaghan","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/author\/april\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29628,"name":"dealing with breakup","slug":"dealing-with-breakup","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29628,"taxonomy":"category","description":"Breakups are painful but worry not; you don't need to go through all of it alone. If you need advice on when and how to break up, you'll find it all here.\r\n","parent":29627,"count":263,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29628,"category_count":263,"category_description":"Breakups are painful but worry not; you don't need to go through all of it alone. If you need advice on when and how to break up, you'll find it all here.\r\n","cat_name":"dealing with breakup","category_nicename":"dealing-with-breakup","category_parent":29627}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/165592","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/13"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=165592"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/165592\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":165599,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/165592\/revisions\/165599"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/165595"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=165592"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=165592"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=165592"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}