{"id":18828,"date":"2020-09-17T07:18:42","date_gmt":"2020-09-17T07:18:42","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/herway.net\/?p=18828"},"modified":"2022-01-09T22:31:31","modified_gmt":"2022-01-09T22:31:31","slug":"la-vida-despues-de-amar-a-un-psicopata-emocional","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/la-vida-despues-de-amar-a-un-psicopata-emocional\/","title":{"rendered":"La vida despu\u00e9s de amar a un psic\u00f3pata emocional"},"content":{"rendered":"

This is where my story begins. I won’t skip right to the end because nothing happened overnight.<\/p>\n

Todo esto ocurri\u00f3 hace un par de a\u00f1os. Y en ese momento, lo que pens\u00e9 que iba a ser una hermosa historia de amor se convirti\u00f3 en un horror.<\/p>\n

A few years ago, my soon to be ex-husband\u2014who turned out to be a complete emotional psycho and an infinite, heartless bastard\u2014saw me with my group of friends at the annual firm thing..<\/p>\n

Afirm\u00f3 que se enamor\u00f3 perdidamente de m\u00ed, as\u00ed que decidi\u00f3 hacer algo al respecto.<\/p>\n

Now that I look back to that moment, I didn\u2019t do anything and I asked for nothing. He came to me, he courted me and may I say, he knew what he was doing.<\/p>\n

Era tan perfecto caballero<\/a>, handsome and eloquent\u2014every woman\u2019s dream. But I didn\u2019t ask for it.<\/p>\n

I often imagine what would have happened if I hadn\u2019t come to the dinner, if I had been sick. Then I would never have met him and my life would have gone down a completely different track.<\/p>\n

\"mujer<\/p>\n

But, I did meet him and what\u2019s even worse, I fell in love with him.<\/p>\n

Me engatus\u00f3 y meti\u00f3 su culo psic\u00f3tico en mi vida lenta e imperceptiblemente. Abus\u00f3 de m\u00ed y me llev\u00f3 a mi punto de ruptura sin que me diera cuenta.<\/strong><\/p>\n

I thought I was going insane. I double-checked every fucking decision I made\u2014that\u2019s if I was even able to make it. All of that because of his devious self.<\/strong><\/p>\n

These people have a special skill. They are so smooth and sophisticated that you won\u2019t even know you are being abused\u2014at least not until it\u2019s all over and you have to find a way to deal with your brokenness, and heal your mind and your soul from so much evil.<\/p>\n

That\u2019s what happened to me. Only when I left, after 7 years of marriage I realized that I was being emotionally abused.<\/p>\n

I was being used and bullied. In my marriage, I was the unpopular new kid in the school and he was the pretentious and beautiful but abusive jock who turned each new kid\u2019s next day into a living nightmare.<\/p>\n

Antes de conocerle, ten\u00eda mucha confianza en m\u00ed misma. Sab\u00eda que ten\u00eda buen aspecto y que era inteligente. Sab\u00eda que pod\u00eda tener cualquier cosa en mi vida si trabajaba lo suficiente para conseguirlo.<\/p>\n

\"mujer<\/p>\n

Los sue\u00f1os no eran s\u00f3lo sue\u00f1os para m\u00ed. Sab\u00eda c\u00f3mo convertirlos en realidad.<\/p>\n

I wasn\u2019t scared of anything. I knew how to ask for something I wanted badly and I knew how to stick up for myself when I needed to.<\/p>\n

Era una mariposa social. Ten\u00eda muchos amigos y disfrutaba mucho saliendo con ellos, contando chistes e historias.<\/p>\n

Realmente era una persona completa. Era feliz conmigo misma. Eso fue hasta que todo empez\u00f3 a desvanecerse lentamente.<\/strong><\/p>\n

During our marriage, I started changing. I wasn\u2019t feeling beautiful anymore and I definitely didn\u2019t have the confidence to take on the world anymore.<\/p>\n

Mis sue\u00f1os se convirtieron en pesadillas a las que quer\u00eda poner fin.<\/p>\n

I began to lock myself in the house because I was scared that if I left, something might happen to me, something that I wouldn\u2019t be able to control. I started to be afraid of life.<\/p>\n

\"mujer<\/p>\n

Ignoraba a mis amigos porque \u00e9l me lav\u00f3 el cerebro haci\u00e9ndome creer que nadie m\u00e1s que \u00e9l importaba. Me convenci\u00f3 de que era la \u00fanica persona en mi vida en la que pod\u00eda confiar.<\/p>\n

La verdad era muy diferente a eso. Era la \u00fanica persona en mi vida de la que deber\u00eda haberme cuidado.<\/p>\n

Me hizo creer que yo era responsable de todo.<\/strong> Como ya he dicho, psic\u00f3patas emocionales<\/a> aren\u2019t always mean. They can sweet talk you and convince you of things and they will never get bored.<\/p>\n

One minute, you\u2019re fighting and the other next, he\u2019s hugging you and telling you that it\u2019s okay, it\u2019s not your fault you\u2019re emotional, you can\u2019t help yourself.<\/p>\n

De hecho, te convencen de que fuiste t\u00fa el responsable de la pelea y tienen la amabilidad de pasarlo por alto y perdonarte.<\/p>\n

Me dio luz de gas.<\/strong> Me hizo creer que cosas que brillaban como el d\u00eda no eran ciertas, que me lo estaba imaginando todo.<\/p>\n

Un d\u00eda le\u00ed unos mensajes en su tel\u00e9fono que se hab\u00eda olvidado de borrar y me di cuenta de que me estaba enga\u00f1ando. Y cuando decid\u00ed confrontarlo al respecto, cambi\u00f3 las tornas.<\/p>\n

\"joven<\/p>\n

He started yelling at me, telling me that I was insane, that I\u2019m imagining things. This fight went on for a few days. He was convincing me aggressively that I\u2019m wrong, that he didn\u2019t do anything and I read that he did.<\/p>\n

Lo le\u00ed con mis propios ojos. Pronto empec\u00e9 a dudar de m\u00ed mismo. Sent\u00ed que tal vez, de alguna manera lo hab\u00eda malinterpretado todo.<\/p>\n

Maybe it wasn\u2019t his fault after all. You see? It was his plan all along. He didn\u2019t have an excuse for his behavior because I caught him lying, so he created a situation in which he could manipulate me into thinking that I am the crazy one.<\/p>\n

Me culpaba de todo.<\/strong> Cada vez que ten\u00eda un problema, encontraba la forma de culparme por ello.<\/p>\n

If he had troubles at work, he would blame me for them because I\u2019m stressing him out at home.<\/p>\n

Si le pon\u00edan una multa por exceso de velocidad, la culpa era m\u00eda una vez m\u00e1s porque le cabreaba, as\u00ed que conduc\u00eda r\u00e1pido para desahogarse.<\/p>\n

Me destruy\u00f3.<\/strong> Los psic\u00f3patas emocionales son personas d\u00e9biles que no tienen nada mejor que hacer en su vida que controlarte<\/a>.<\/p>\n

\"hombre<\/p>\n

Se alimentan del control. Les da poder y la sensaci\u00f3n de que son importantes.<\/p>\n

Me alimentaba con pensamientos t\u00f3xicos para impedirme ver lo hermosa, inteligente y fuerte que soy, y as\u00ed poder controlarme m\u00e1s f\u00e1cilmente. Me encontr\u00e9 creyendo esa mierda.<\/p>\n

Realmente pensaba que no era nadie sin \u00e9l, as\u00ed que me aferr\u00e9 a \u00e9l a\u00fan m\u00e1s porque pensaba que era lo mejor que pod\u00eda tener.<\/p>\n

I thought I was broken and no one would love me for me, so I better appreciate him for \u2018putting up\u2019 with me. He had the power to make me believe anything he wanted.<\/p>\n

Me sac\u00f3 a latigazos.<\/strong> He isolated me from the rest of the world. He convinced me that I didn\u2019t need my friends because I have him.<\/p>\n

Y lo que realmente estaba en juego era que ten\u00eda tanto miedo de que mis amigos y la gente que de verdad se preocupa por m\u00ed me hicieran entrar en raz\u00f3n y me abrieran los ojos para ver lo imb\u00e9cil que era.<\/p>\n

He was afraid they will convince me to do what\u2019s the best for myself and leave him. He had invested so much time making me \u2018perfect\u2019 according to his standards to let my friends ruin all of that.<\/p>\n

\"hombre<\/p>\n

As\u00ed que te preguntar\u00e1s por qu\u00e9 aguant\u00e9 toda esa mierda durante tanto tiempo. Ojal\u00e1 pudiera darte una respuesta directa. Ojal\u00e1 supiera la raz\u00f3n. Pero, hay una cosa que puedo decirte.<\/p>\n

Estaba enamorado; estaba cegado por el amor.<\/p>\n

I was manipulated so hard that I failed to see what was really going on around me. Combine manipulation and love and here you go – a perfect recipe for a toxic disaster.<\/p>\n

Hubo momentos en los que abr\u00ed los ojos por un momento y vi la realidad tal y como era, pero una parte de m\u00ed la ignoraba con la esperanza de que desapareciera y otra quer\u00eda luchar por \u00e9l y ayudarle a cambiar.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Pero no hay cura para gente como \u00e9l.<\/strong><\/p>\n

There is no magic wand that will take away the evil mind and turn it into loving and compassionate one. I learned that the hard way. Don\u2019t make the same mistake I did!<\/strong><\/p>\n

Las secuelas de salir con un psic\u00f3pata emocional<\/a> es algo con lo que tienes que lidiar. S\u00ed, era m\u00e1s f\u00e1cil rendirse. Podr\u00eda haberme encerrado en mi habitaci\u00f3n y quedarme all\u00ed hasta pudrirme.<\/p>\n

S\u00ed, podr\u00eda haberme destruido a m\u00ed mismo con el alcohol y las drogas. S\u00ed, podr\u00eda haberme involucrado en conductas tortuosas, pero \u00bfa d\u00f3nde me llevar\u00eda todo eso?<\/p>\n

\"mujer<\/p>\n

\u00bfQu\u00e9 obtendr\u00eda, salvo una versi\u00f3n a\u00fan m\u00e1s pat\u00e9tica de m\u00ed mismo?<\/p>\n

En lugar de eso, decid\u00ed seguir adelante.<\/strong> Decid\u00ed para aprender la lecci\u00f3n<\/a>...tomar su intento de destruir mi vida por completo y volverlo a mi favor.<\/p>\n

I grew and I swore to myself that I won\u2019t hate myself and never let someone hurt and use me in that way ever again.<\/p>\n

En lugar de resentimiento y odio, siento orgullo.<\/strong> I\u2019m very proud of myself. Yes, I fell into his trap. I bought every one of his lies.<\/p>\n

Me ceg\u00f3 su falso \u00e9xito, pero consegu\u00ed ser yo misma en el momento en que m\u00e1s necesitaba serlo.<\/p>\n

I proved to myself that no matter how low I sink in my life, no matter if I hit the rock bottom, I can rise again and go back to the place I fell from\u2014and even higher.<\/p>\n

Me di cuenta de que era jodidamente fuerte.<\/strong> Sobreviv\u00ed a una vida con un psic\u00f3pata emocional y me levant\u00e9.<\/p>\n

\"mujer<\/p>\n

I learned from my mistakes without anyone\u2019s help. I was on the edge, but I grabbed the last branch and I fought not to fall down.<\/p>\n

If it weren\u2019t for him, I would never have seen how much shit I could take in my life. I would never have seen my true worth and I would never have appreciated myself as I do now.<\/p>\n

I was strong and independent before, but that\u2019s nothing in comparison with what I am today. And if it weren\u2019t for emotional abuse, for the brainwashing and gaslighting, I would have stayed the same.<\/p>\n

As\u00ed crec\u00ed mejor, m\u00e1s fuerte y m\u00e1s inteligente.<\/p>\n

Sigui\u00f3 siendo la misma pobre y d\u00e9bil alma psic\u00f3tica, en busca de un cuerpo al que aferrarse y chupar hasta secarse. Depender\u00e1 de los dem\u00e1s el resto de su vida.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m good all by myself. I don\u2019t need a man to define me. I fought in the greatest battle of my life and I won.<\/p>\n

\u00bf\u00c9l? Sigui\u00f3 siendo el mismo bastardo escurridizo de siempre.<\/p>\n

\"La<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

This is where my story begins. I won’t skip right to the end because nothing happened overnight. All of this went down a couple of years ago. And at that time, what I thought is going to be a beautiful love story turned into a horror. A few years ago, my soon to be ex-husband\u2014who…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":23,"featured_media":112925,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29631],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-18828","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-getting-over-him"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29631,"label":"getting over him"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/Life-After-Loving-An-Emotional-Psychopath-1024x684.jpg",1024,684,true],"author_info":{"display_name":"Leah Lee","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/author\/leah\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29631,"name":"getting over him","slug":"getting-over-him","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29631,"taxonomy":"category","description":"Getting over someone you still care about is one of the biggest challenges, but nothing is impossible when you know you're not alone, so check out our brilliant advice.","parent":29627,"count":124,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29631,"category_count":124,"category_description":"Getting over someone you still care about is one of the biggest challenges, but nothing is impossible when you know you're not alone, so check out our brilliant advice.","cat_name":"getting over him","category_nicename":"getting-over-him","category_parent":29627}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18828","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/23"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=18828"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18828\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/112925"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=18828"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=18828"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=18828"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}