{"id":33171,"date":"2020-09-19T11:55:42","date_gmt":"2020-09-19T11:55:42","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/herway.net\/?p=33171"},"modified":"2022-03-01T23:17:25","modified_gmt":"2022-03-01T23:17:25","slug":"deje-de-ser-demasiado-amable-porque-estaba-cansada-de-que-me-dieran-por-sentada","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/deje-de-ser-demasiado-amable-porque-estaba-cansada-de-que-me-dieran-por-sentada\/","title":{"rendered":"Dej\u00e9 de ser \"demasiado amable\" porque estaba harta de que me dieran por supuesta"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>All\u00ed estaba yo de nuevo, pagando un alto precio por mi amabilidad, ahog\u00e1ndome en l\u00e1grimas porque me hab\u00eda apu\u00f1alado por la espalda alguien en quien confiaba plenamente, alguien a quien hab\u00eda dado lo mejor de m\u00ed.<\/p>\n<p>The only thing that separated this particular moment from all the similar ones in the past is that this was the last drop that spilled the cup, this was the moment when I\u2019d finally <a href=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/life\/when-enough-is-enough-she-will-leave-without-a-doubt-in-her-mind\/\">tuvo suficiente<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>I didn\u2019t decide to change completely and become a heartless bitch.<\/p>\n<p>I still wanted to be one of the nice girls but I knew it was high time to erase the word \u2018too\u2019 that came before \u2018nice\u2019.<\/p>\n<p>Ver\u00e1s, yo era uno de esos a los que se admiraba y se compadec\u00eda al mismo tiempo.<\/p>\n<p>My friends would say, \u201cShe is too nice, too good, too amazing and that\u2019s exactly what makes her the absolute worst for herself.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Lamentablemente, ten\u00edan raz\u00f3n.<\/p>\n<p>Yo era mi propio enemigo y <a href=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/deja-de-8-cosas-solo-eres-agradable\/\">ser demasiado amable con la gente<\/a> fue la causa de mi autodestrucci\u00f3n. Me hizo fracasar tanto en las relaciones amorosas como en las amistades.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-122582\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/Portrait-of-young-beautiful-woman-outdoors-on-green-summer-nature-background.jpg\" alt=\"Retrato de mujer joven y hermosa al aire libre sobre fondo verde naturaleza de verano\" width=\"1600\" height=\"1068\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/Portrait-of-young-beautiful-woman-outdoors-on-green-summer-nature-background.jpg 1600w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/Portrait-of-young-beautiful-woman-outdoors-on-green-summer-nature-background-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/Portrait-of-young-beautiful-woman-outdoors-on-green-summer-nature-background-1024x684.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/Portrait-of-young-beautiful-woman-outdoors-on-green-summer-nature-background-768x513.jpg 768w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/Portrait-of-young-beautiful-woman-outdoors-on-green-summer-nature-background-1536x1025.jpg 1536w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/Portrait-of-young-beautiful-woman-outdoors-on-green-summer-nature-background-150x100.jpg 150w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/Portrait-of-young-beautiful-woman-outdoors-on-green-summer-nature-background-720x481.jpg 720w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/Portrait-of-young-beautiful-woman-outdoors-on-green-summer-nature-background-1280x854.jpg 1280w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1600px) 100vw, 1600px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Mis relaciones fracasaron porque daba demasiado y demasiado pronto. Me desviv\u00eda por hacer feliz a la otra persona.<\/p>\n<p>Fui demasiado comprensivo y complaciente.<\/p>\n<p>Por ejemplo, yo le enviaba un mensaje a mi ex en cuanto se encend\u00eda mi tel\u00e9fono, aunque \u00e9l me ignorara por completo durante la mayor parte del d\u00eda.<\/p>\n<p>Le dejar\u00eda volver a mi cama aunque se ausentara sin permiso.<\/p>\n<p><em><strong>Him being there, him serving me crumbs, was enough for me back then. For the life of me, I don\u2019t know how it could ever be enough and how I didn\u2019t realize sooner that he was only taking advantage of my feelings.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n<p>I wasn\u2019t even aware of what I was doing for the better part of the time. I would do things without even thinking about them.<\/p>\n<p>Yo siempre me esforzaba m\u00e1s, daba m\u00e1s y trabajaba m\u00e1s duro, as\u00ed que, al final, \u00e9l y todos y cada uno de mis ex lo daban por hecho.<\/p>\n<p>Algunos de mis amigos, o mejor dicho <a href=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/life\/por-favor-deja-de-regalar-tu-energia-a-la-gente-equivocada\/\">ex-amigos<\/a>, weren\u2019t far behind.<\/p>\n<p>Yo era el ejemplo de libro de texto de un acomodaticio y un pusil\u00e1nime y se aprovecharon de ello.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-122583\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/Face-of-young-beautiful-woman-in-summer-sun.jpg\" alt=\"Rostro de mujer joven y bella bajo el sol de verano\" width=\"1600\" height=\"1068\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/Face-of-young-beautiful-woman-in-summer-sun.jpg 1600w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/Face-of-young-beautiful-woman-in-summer-sun-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/Face-of-young-beautiful-woman-in-summer-sun-1024x684.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/Face-of-young-beautiful-woman-in-summer-sun-768x513.jpg 768w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/Face-of-young-beautiful-woman-in-summer-sun-1536x1025.jpg 1536w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/Face-of-young-beautiful-woman-in-summer-sun-150x100.jpg 150w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/Face-of-young-beautiful-woman-in-summer-sun-720x481.jpg 720w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/Face-of-young-beautiful-woman-in-summer-sun-1280x854.jpg 1280w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1600px) 100vw, 1600px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>They knew they could count on me and rely on me no matter what. That it didn\u2019t matter whether it was day or night, I was there for them.<\/p>\n<p><em><strong>Pero sorpresa sorpresa, cada vez que necesitaba que hicieran lo mismo, nunca estaban all\u00ed.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n<p>Cada vez que necesitaba un hombro sobre el que llorar, no encontraba ninguno, mientras que el m\u00edo a\u00fan estaba h\u00famedo de la \u00faltima vez que lo necesitaron.<\/p>\n<p>Yo estaba all\u00ed para levantarlos y hacerlos sentir mejor consigo mismos y cuando yo estaba deprimido s\u00f3lo me ayudaban a seguir deprimido.<\/p>\n<p>Necesitaba endurecerme y cambiar mi forma de ser cuanto antes. Necesitaba despedirme de algunas personas de mi vida.<\/p>\n<p>I needed to say goodbye to being \u2018too nice\u2019. I needed to learn how to be nice to myself for a change.<\/p>\n<p>Todo el amor, la comprensi\u00f3n, la dulzura y la bondad que tan desinteresadamente hab\u00eda dado a los dem\u00e1s, empec\u00e9 a d\u00e1rmelos a m\u00ed misma.<\/p>\n<p>Toda esa fuerza y determinaci\u00f3n que hab\u00eda mostrado a la hora de luchar por ellos, la redirig\u00ed hacia m\u00ed.<\/p>\n<p>And it\u2019s no surprise that my life changed for the better.<\/p>\n<p><em><strong>Lo que aprend\u00ed es que la gente te trata como t\u00fa les ense\u00f1as a tratarte. Si permites que te traten mal y te pisoteen, seguro que lo har\u00e1n.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-122585\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/young-beautiful-lady-in-a-birch-forest.jpg\" alt=\"joven bella dama en un bosque de abedules\" width=\"1600\" height=\"1068\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/young-beautiful-lady-in-a-birch-forest.jpg 1600w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/young-beautiful-lady-in-a-birch-forest-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/young-beautiful-lady-in-a-birch-forest-1024x684.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/young-beautiful-lady-in-a-birch-forest-768x513.jpg 768w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/young-beautiful-lady-in-a-birch-forest-1536x1025.jpg 1536w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/young-beautiful-lady-in-a-birch-forest-150x100.jpg 150w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/young-beautiful-lady-in-a-birch-forest-720x481.jpg 720w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/young-beautiful-lady-in-a-birch-forest-1280x854.jpg 1280w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1600px) 100vw, 1600px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>So, I stopped making efforts for those who weren&#8217;t making any for me.<\/p>\n<p>I stopped texting and calling those that weren\u2019t making any real effort to be in my life.<\/p>\n<p>I started investing equally instead. I learned to match people\u2019s efforts.<\/p>\n<p>De reciprocidad se trata; merezco todo el tiempo, el afecto y la atenci\u00f3n que sigo dando a los dem\u00e1s.<\/p>\n<p>Necesito a alguien que me devuelva todas esas cosas sin esfuerzo. Alguien que me encuentre a mitad de camino.<\/p>\n<p>I stopped saying \u2018yes\u2019 to get-togethers, ideas, and plans I didn\u2019t want a be a part of.<\/p>\n<p>I started saying \u2018no\u2019 more often and I realized that it is a very powerful world. It doesn\u2019t need any additional explanations.<\/p>\n<p>My time is precious and valuable and I choose how I spend it. I don\u2019t want to waste it anymore. I will do nice things for other people but not at my own expense.<\/p>\n<p>I stopped apologizing for other people\u2019s mistakes.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-122586\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/a-girl-with-big-blue-eyes.jpg\" alt=\"una chica con grandes ojos azules\" width=\"1600\" height=\"1068\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/a-girl-with-big-blue-eyes.jpg 1600w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/a-girl-with-big-blue-eyes-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/a-girl-with-big-blue-eyes-1024x684.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/a-girl-with-big-blue-eyes-768x513.jpg 768w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/a-girl-with-big-blue-eyes-1536x1025.jpg 1536w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/a-girl-with-big-blue-eyes-150x100.jpg 150w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/a-girl-with-big-blue-eyes-720x481.jpg 720w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/a-girl-with-big-blue-eyes-1280x854.jpg 1280w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1600px) 100vw, 1600px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>I can\u2019t be the only one to blame, not everything is my fault and I am not responsible for the moods of other people.<\/p>\n<p>Now, I only take accountability for my own actions. I don\u2019t burden myself with other people\u2019s feelings as much as I used to and I started caring for my own feelings for a change.<\/p>\n<p>I stopped being \u2018too nice\u2019 because I had been left without a choice, I was tired of feeling unseen and taken for granted and it was the best decision I ever made.<\/p>\n<p>Mi vida ahora s\u00f3lo incluye a las personas que est\u00e1n dispuestas a devolver tanto como reciben, personas que me quieren por m\u00ed y no por lo que yo pueda hacer por ellas.<\/p>\n<p>People who appreciate and respect me because I won\u2019t allow anybody to mess me around.<\/p>\n<p>Sigo siendo una buena persona, pero dej\u00e9 de exagerar con ser amable y empec\u00e9 a ver mi propio valor.<\/p>\n<p>Ahora soy una versi\u00f3n nueva y mejorada de la buena mujer que sol\u00eda ser.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-122587\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/I-Stopped-Being-\u2018Too-Nice-Because-I-Was-Tired-Of-Being-Taken-For-Granted-pinterest.jpg\" alt=\"Dej\u00e9 de ser &quot;demasiado amable&quot; porque estaba harta de que me dieran por supuesta\" width=\"683\" height=\"1024\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/I-Stopped-Being-\u2018Too-Nice-Because-I-Was-Tired-Of-Being-Taken-For-Granted-pinterest.jpg 683w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/I-Stopped-Being-\u2018Too-Nice-Because-I-Was-Tired-Of-Being-Taken-For-Granted-pinterest-200x300.jpg 200w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/I-Stopped-Being-\u2018Too-Nice-Because-I-Was-Tired-Of-Being-Taken-For-Granted-pinterest-150x225.jpg 150w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 683px) 100vw, 683px\" \/><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>There I was again, paying a high price for my niceness, drowning in tears because I had been backstabbed by someone I completely trusted, by someone I had given my best to. The only thing that separated this particular moment from all the similar ones in the past is that this was the last drop&#8230;<\/p>","protected":false},"author":40,"featured_media":122580,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29619],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-33171","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-stories-love"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29619,"label":"stories"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/I-Stopped-Being-\u2018Too-Nice-Because-I-Was-Tired-Of-Being-Taken-For-Granted-1024x684.jpg",1024,684,true],"author_info":{"display_name":"Tara Brown","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/author\/tara-brown\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29619,"name":"stories","slug":"stories-love","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29619,"taxonomy":"category","description":"To all the souls struggling with complicated love experiences: These heartfelt stories about love, heartbreak, and moving on will be your voice of wisdom.","parent":38,"count":424,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29619,"category_count":424,"category_description":"To all the souls struggling with complicated love experiences: These heartfelt stories about love, heartbreak, and moving on will be your voice of wisdom.","cat_name":"stories","category_nicename":"stories-love","category_parent":38}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33171","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/40"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=33171"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33171\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/122580"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=33171"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=33171"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=33171"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}