{"id":39949,"date":"2019-07-08T10:38:26","date_gmt":"2019-07-08T10:38:26","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/herway.net\/?p=39949"},"modified":"2021-08-12T06:50:22","modified_gmt":"2021-08-12T06:50:22","slug":"por-que-soy-siempre-una-copia-de-seguridad-y-nunca-una-novia","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/por-que-soy-siempre-una-copia-de-seguridad-y-nunca-una-novia\/","title":{"rendered":"\u00bfPor qu\u00e9 siempre soy un apoyo y nunca una novia?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>In my 28 years and a lot of dating, I have never had a serious relationship. Somehow I always ended up being something in between\u2014not a one-night-stand, not a short fling, but definitely not a labeled girlfriend.<\/p>\n<p>I believe I would be a great catch because I have always been faithful, I am a hard-working person, people say I am funny and smart, and I am relatively pretty (if that is really important), but all of my \u201cboyfriends\u201d replaced me with their \u201cvanilla\u201d girlfriends whom they labeled immediately and gave them everything I always wanted.<\/p>\n<p><b><i>En realidad, me habr\u00eda conformado incluso con menos de lo que les daban a sus eventuales novias, pero ni siquiera intentaron darme nada.<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p>Being something undefined is the worst thing because you don\u2019t have the right to object to him about anything since you are not a real girlfriend of his. When people ask you if you have anyone, you don\u2019t know how to reply to that, and the worst part is that you always live in fear.<\/p>\n<p>Es el miedo a perder a esa persona y no poder mostrar tus emociones despu\u00e9s porque todo el mundo, incluso tus mejores amigos, te lo dir\u00e1n: <em>\u201cWell, he was never your boyfriend, so technically he did not cheat on you; he had an absolute right to do that.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Your friends\u2014especially the ones who were never in that situation and who always had long-term relationships, labeled from the beginning\u2014will never understand that this hurts sometimes even more because you are left with the eternal questioning: \u201cIf we had been together properly, things might have been different now. He might have realized how great I was, and he might have even proposed to me already.\u201d<\/p>\n<p><b>Another thing that always kept me seriously questioning myself was: \u201cWhat did this new girl do exactly to make him commit?\u201d<\/b><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-39985 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/scott-warman-PggUV23z1fc-unsplash-1.jpg\" alt=\"\u00bfPor qu\u00e9 siempre soy un apoyo y nunca una novia?\" width=\"800\" height=\"533\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/scott-warman-PggUV23z1fc-unsplash-1.jpg 800w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/scott-warman-PggUV23z1fc-unsplash-1-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/scott-warman-PggUV23z1fc-unsplash-1-768x512.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat were her techniques? She is not that much prettier, and I have heard that she is not that much smarter or funnier than me, according to his friends who actually liked me.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Oh, la constante comparaci\u00f3n que me volv\u00eda loca. No paraba de pensar y darle vueltas a cada movimiento que hac\u00eda y a cada palabra que dec\u00eda. Tambi\u00e9n la acechaba a ella y a \u00e9l, y de hecho hasta fing\u00eda que yo era ella y que \u00e9l me tratar\u00eda como la trataba a ella.<\/p>\n<p>The day I decided it needed to stop was actually a really long time after that\u2014a year and a half to be exact.<\/p>\n<p>Me di cuenta de que probablemente lo \u00fanico que hac\u00eda era ponerse a s\u00ed misma en primer lugar y no pensar demasiado en todo. Yo ten\u00eda este patr\u00f3n; todav\u00eda lo tengo. Cada vez que conozco a alguien, sigo pregunt\u00e1ndome: <em>\u201cWhen is he going to leave me for another one who is smarter and maybe even sneakier in her plans than me?\u201d<\/em><br \/><b>Y casi sent\u00ed que esos hombres podr\u00edan haber olido mi miedo y, por lo tanto, haberme dejado. <\/b><\/p>\n<p>I don\u2019t care anymore if someone is going to leave and not commit to me anymore. I am done with it. I am turning myself over to my inner self. I want to become successful, and I no longer want to overthink and plan everything when it comes to men.<\/p>\n<p>I am not pleasing anyone anymore, and I am not settling for breadcrumbs anymore. I would rather be alone and sleep tight because those \u201crelationships\u201d before always left great fear in me.<\/p>\n<p>Nunca he dormido bien. Y si alguien me vuelve a decir que tengo que hacer un plan, ir un paso por delante, y que los hombres son realmente f\u00e1ciles de entender, que toda mujer puede tener al hombre que quiera si planea las cosas con cuidado, pues les cierro la boca.<\/p>\n<p>I don\u2019t want to be tactical about anything. I want to be a complete person with myself, and if someone shows up along the road, I want things straight and clear and honest from the beginning.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-39983 size-large\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/scott-683x1024.jpg\" alt=\"\u00bfPor qu\u00e9 siempre soy un apoyo y nunca una novia?\" width=\"683\" height=\"1024\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/scott-683x1024.jpg 683w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/scott-200x300.jpg 200w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/scott.jpg 735w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 683px) 100vw, 683px\" \/><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"author":42,"featured_media":39984,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29646],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-39949","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-understanding-men"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29646,"label":"understanding men"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/scott-warman-PggUV23z1fc-unsplash.jpg",800,533,false],"author_info":{"display_name":"Selma June","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/author\/selmajune\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29646,"name":"understanding men","slug":"understanding-men","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29646,"taxonomy":"category","description":"Wondering about what's going on inside his head? Or do you need explanations for his actions? Learn to understand men, and your life will become easier.","parent":29643,"count":570,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29646,"category_count":570,"category_description":"Wondering about what's going on inside his head? Or do you need explanations for his actions? Learn to understand men, and your life will become easier.","cat_name":"understanding men","category_nicename":"understanding-men","category_parent":29643}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/39949","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/42"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=39949"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/39949\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/39984"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=39949"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=39949"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=39949"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}