{"id":85441,"date":"2020-07-09T08:51:51","date_gmt":"2020-07-09T08:51:51","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/herway.net\/?p=85441"},"modified":"2022-01-24T18:42:40","modified_gmt":"2022-01-24T18:42:40","slug":"como-dejar-de-buscar-la-validacion-de-los-demas","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/como-dejar-de-buscar-la-validacion-de-los-demas\/","title":{"rendered":"C\u00f3mo dejar de buscar la validaci\u00f3n de los dem\u00e1s para empezar a prosperar"},"content":{"rendered":"

Buscar la validaci\u00f3n de los dem\u00e1s es uno de los mayores enemigos de todo ser humano. <\/span>ser humano<\/span> porque la necesidad de la <\/span>aprobaci\u00f3n de los dem\u00e1s<\/span> mata la libertad y bloquea tu <\/span>verdadero yo<\/span>. <\/span><\/p>\n

Esto es lo que ocurre dentro de la mente de una persona propensa a <\/span>b\u00fasqueda de validaci\u00f3n<\/span>:<\/span><\/p>\n

“If I wear that one outfit, my date will think that I’m too casual and not trying hard enough. If I don’t compliment her\/his hairstyle, they’ll get mad at me (even though I think their previous hairstyle was better). <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

If I don’t look awesome in this photo, I won’t get many likes on <\/span><\/i>redes sociales<\/span><\/i><\/a>. If I do this or that, they will criticize me and think that I’m insane. But if I manage to meet their needs and behave in a certain manner, they will like me.”<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Se calcula que la poblaci\u00f3n mundial ha alcanzado los 7.800 millones de personas. Ahora imagine qu\u00e9 tipo de escenarios se producir\u00edan en cada <\/span>ser humano<\/span>‘s head if every single one of us was seeking approval from other people.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00bfTe imaginas cu\u00e1ntos mon\u00f3logos imaginativos puede contar un <\/span>b\u00fasqueda de validaci\u00f3n<\/span> persona tiene en un <\/span>diariamente<\/span>? O el amplio abanico de cosas y todos los posibles detalles en los que tienen que centrarse para buscar <\/span>validaci\u00f3n externa<\/span>?<\/span><\/p>\n

Buscar constantemente la aprobaci\u00f3n de los dem\u00e1s es un proceso agotador y, lo peor de todo, es un proceso que te impide prosperar y alcanzar todo tu potencial.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00bfPor qu\u00e9 buscamos la aprobaci\u00f3n y la validaci\u00f3n de otras personas?<\/strong><\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

As\u00ed que una de las preguntas m\u00e1s importantes es: <\/span>\u00bfPor qu\u00e9 tenemos esa tendencia a buscar la validaci\u00f3n de los dem\u00e1s, a preocuparnos por lo que piensan? <\/b><\/p>\n

Every single one of us has come into the world alone. From our mother’s womb, we entered the world’s womb with a mission to find our purpose and become the best version of ourself. <\/span><\/p>\n

Cada uno de nosotros es \u00fanico <\/span><\/i>ser humano<\/span><\/i> con nuestras propias peculiaridades y defectos.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Cada uno de nosotros tiene sus propias preferencias, aficiones, trabajo y su propio camino, as\u00ed que \u00bfpor qu\u00e9 necesitamos que los dem\u00e1s aprueben nuestras acciones y validen nuestra forma de pensar?<\/span><\/p>\n

Dos de las principales razones por las que algunos de nosotros buscamos la validaci\u00f3n de los dem\u00e1s se deben a <\/span>baja autoestima<\/span> y <\/span>autoestima<\/span>.<\/span><\/p>\n

Buscamos validaci\u00f3n<\/span> from other people when we’re fighting with <\/span>autoaceptaci\u00f3n<\/span> porque los necesitamos para sentirnos dignos y para <\/span>impulsar nuestra <\/span>confianza en s\u00ed mismo<\/span><\/a>.<\/span><\/p>\n

Sustituimos nuestros <\/span>autoaprobaci\u00f3n<\/span> con <\/span>others’ approval<\/span> y esta pr\u00e1ctica influye mucho en c\u00f3mo funcionamos en nuestro <\/span>vida cotidiana<\/span>.<\/span><\/p>\n

Tenemos miedo de decepcionar a los dem\u00e1s y nos convertimos en <\/span>complacer a la gente<\/span> que han perdido su <\/span>valor propio<\/span> y <\/span>amor propio<\/span>.<\/span><\/p>\n

A veces nuestra tendencia a buscar la aprobaci\u00f3n es un comportamiento aprendido o innato y otras veces es algo que se desarrolla con el tiempo:<\/span><\/p>\n

1. Un comportamiento aprendido<\/h2>\n

\"dos<\/p>\n

Every child sees their parents as role models. The truth is, children learn by observing their parents\u2019 behaviors and they tend to mimic their words and actions. <\/span><\/p>\n

Si uno o ambos progenitores buscan constantemente el reconocimiento y la aprobaci\u00f3n de otras personas, su hijo pensar\u00e1 que eso es algo que ellos tambi\u00e9n deber\u00edan hacer.<\/span><\/p>\n

For example, a mother has bought a T-shirt or a dress and she doesn’t want to wear it until she talks to her friends in order to get their approval. <\/span><\/p>\n

Perhaps this is a banal example but I’m sure there are plenty of females and males who do this on a regular basis.<\/span><\/p>\n

They need other people’s validation because they are not sure about their own style and tastes in things. And there lies the real danger for mental health! <\/span><\/p>\n

Por ello, estas personas nunca o casi nunca desarrollan sus propias opiniones sobre las distintas cosas de la vida (desde el trabajo y las aficiones hasta las camisetas), porque les preocupa sobre todo lo que la sociedad les dir\u00e1 sobre sus palabras y acciones.<\/span><\/p>\n

2. Un comportamiento innato<\/h2>\n

\"mujer<\/p>\n

A veces, buscar la aprobaci\u00f3n de los dem\u00e1s no tiene nada que ver con un comportamiento aprendido, sino que est\u00e1 profundamente arraigado en nuestro ADN. Si generaciones de personas antes que t\u00fa tuvieron <\/span>b\u00fasqueda de validaci\u00f3n<\/span> problemas, lo m\u00e1s probable es que usted desarrolle los mismos problemas. <\/span><\/p>\n

En cierto modo, heredamos h\u00e1bitos de nuestros antepasados y a veces esos h\u00e1bitos son t\u00f3xicos, mientras que otras veces son h\u00e1bitos de calidad como <\/span>vivir un estilo de vida hol\u00edstico<\/span><\/a> (comer sano, ir al gimnasio, etc.) y similares. <\/span><\/p>\n

Un comportamiento innato es m\u00e1s dif\u00edcil de cambiar o influenciar, pero a\u00fan as\u00ed se pueden reducir significativamente los niveles de <\/span>b\u00fasqueda de validaci\u00f3n<\/span> con pr\u00e1cticas que se explicar\u00e1n a continuaci\u00f3n. <\/span><\/p>\n

3. La necesidad de autovalidaci\u00f3n<\/h2>\n

\"dos<\/p>\n

\u00bfC\u00f3mo te sientes cuando dices o haces algo que los dem\u00e1s tambi\u00e9n aprueban? Te sientes genial, \u00bfverdad?<\/span><\/p>\n

You get the feeling that you’re doing it right because other people agree with you and they support your opinions or actions.<\/span><\/p>\n

A positive response from other people often becomes addictive and that’s why we tend to seek more and more approval in the future, just to feel good about ourself and others. <\/span><\/p>\n

Imagina que has hecho algo incre\u00edble que ha sido aprobado por alguien que realmente te gusta (como una celebridad o un influencer). Estar\u00edas en las nubes, \u00bfverdad? <\/span><\/p>\n

While appreciating other people’s opinions is desirable, overly worrying about it and constantly seeking their approval and validation is toxic (regardless of whether they are a celebrity or a regular <\/span>ser humano<\/span>). <\/span><\/p>\n

V\u00e9ase tambi\u00e9n: <\/span>18 maneras sencillas de convertirte en una prioridad como te mereces<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n

How Is The Need For Approval Affecting Your \u2018Performance\u2019?<\/em><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

1. Procrastinaci\u00f3n<\/b><\/h2>\n

\"mujer<\/p>\n

If you’re overly worried about other people’s approval, you might start procrastinating (avoid doing things just because you’re too anxious about the possible outcomes). <\/span><\/p>\n

You want them to like and support everything you do even though you’re aware of the fact that this is impossible.<\/span><\/p>\n

That’s why you choose to do nothing instead or postpone things because by hibernating, you’re avoiding potential disappointments, judgy behaviors and similar. <\/span><\/p>\n

Procrastination can be a really dangerous thing because you might decline new opportunities and all other things out of fear that you’ll fail at them and not succeed in meeting other people’s expectations. <\/span><\/p>\n

2. Hacer demasiado<\/h2>\n

\"mujer<\/p>\n

Lo contrario de la procrastinaci\u00f3n es hacer demasiado todo el tiempo.<\/span><\/p>\n

It’s when you’re determined to do everything right, to take every new opportunity and to literally be perfect in every aspect of your life, from your appearance to work. You might be a <\/span>triunfador<\/span> pero esto tiene un precio.<\/span><\/p>\n

So, you end up in an endless cycle where you’re constantly <\/span>en busca de la perfecci\u00f3n<\/span><\/a> s\u00f3lo porque quieres evitar que los dem\u00e1s te critiquen o decepcionarles de un modo u otro. <\/span><\/p>\n

Al ser demasiado duro consigo mismo, introduce pensamientos ansiosos, preocupaciones constantes e inquietud en su rutina diaria.<\/span><\/p>\n

You’re constantly focused on pleasing everyone around you, overworking yourself to the point of exhaustion and you never say no to other people regardless of whether their requests are demanding or things that you don’t really want to do. <\/span><\/p>\n

3. No estar en contacto con uno mismo<\/h2>\n

\"mujer<\/p>\n

Overly worrying about other people’s approval and validation blocks your own opinions. By only being focused on meeting other people’s standards and their needs, you’re neglecting your own wishes and desires. <\/span><\/p>\n

You start to lose touch with yourself because you don’t know what it is that you really want in life, what makes you fulfilled and happy so you basically live mechanically. <\/span><\/p>\n

You get stuck in a boring, regular job just because this is approved by society and because you haven’t developed your own thinking.<\/span><\/p>\n

Your personality is shaped by other people’s thoughts and beliefs instead of your own. You start feeling lost and as if you’re a stranger to yourself. <\/span><\/p>\n

No estar en contacto con uno mismo bloquea el camino hacia la verdadera felicidad y para alcanzar todo tu potencial, que es un <\/span>cosa mala<\/span>.<\/span><\/p>\n

C\u00f3mo dejar de buscar la validaci\u00f3n de otras personas<\/em><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

1. Aumenta tu amor propio y tu autoaceptaci\u00f3n<\/h2>\n

\"mujer<\/p>\n

Si quiere dejar <\/span>ir de la necesidad<\/span> para buscar la aprobaci\u00f3n de los dem\u00e1s, tienes que empezar a centrarte en ti mismo.<\/span><\/p>\n

Necesita dejar de buscar el amor y la aceptaci\u00f3n de <\/a><\/span>fuentes externas<\/span> porque esa pr\u00e1ctica es t\u00f3xica (sobre todo a largo plazo). <\/span><\/p>\n

En lugar de eso, tienes que centrarte en la fuente interna que hay dentro de ti. Empieza a trabajar en la construcci\u00f3n de tu <\/span>autoaceptaci\u00f3n<\/span> e impulsar su <\/span>amor propio<\/span> because that’s the only way to getting in touch with your <\/span>verdadero yo<\/span>.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u200b<\/span>Dejar ir<\/span> of the need of approval from other people means opening doors that were there in front of you this whole time but you just weren’t aware of them.<\/span><\/p>\n

Once you enter these doors, you will realize that you don’t need other people’s approval in order to feel worthy. <\/span><\/p>\n

Una de las mejores formas de entrar en contacto contigo mismo y darte cuenta de lo que vales es llevar un diario con regularidad. <\/span><\/p>\n

Make a list of the things you like about yourself, write down your recent choices and achievements or some valuable lessons you’ve learned or just write about how you feel about certain things and situations. <\/span><\/p>\n

B\u00e1sicamente, escribe sobre lo que se te ocurra, porque as\u00ed empezar\u00e1s a entenderte mejor a ti mismo, que es la clave para entrar en contacto con tu <\/span>verdadero yo<\/span>.<\/span><\/p>\n

V\u00e9ase tambi\u00e9n: <\/span>Esto es lo que significa realmente quererse a uno mismo<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n

2. Stop seeking other people’s approval for your choices<\/h2>\n

\"mujer<\/p>\n

“I don’t want to watch this movie because I don’t want to be judged by my friends or family because they don’t approve of it.<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

I don’t want to wear these trousers in public because they might look weird to some people even though I like them a lot. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Even though I’m not interested in watching football, I’ll still do it just because I want to make my partner happy. I don’t want to go for a walk at this hour because people will think I’m crazy.”<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Read and re-read the above sentences if needed to realize the toxicity of those statements. Also, don’t get me wrong about the last one. <\/span><\/p>\n

There’s nothing wrong with making other people happy but constantly doing something you don’t enjoy for the sake of earning praise from others is not healthy. As always, compromising is the best bet.<\/span><\/p>\n

Debe comprender que es posible que no comparta la misma <\/span>puntos de vista<\/span> with other people and that’s more than okay. <\/span><\/p>\n

As a matter of fact, it’s necessary because diversity is what makes us different and unique. So, stop being a <\/span>marioneta<\/span> who dances to other people’s tunes by doing everything THEY want.<\/span><\/p>\n

It’s time to ask yourself: <\/span>\u00bfQu\u00e9 es lo que T\u00da quieres?<\/b> <\/span><\/p>\n

Do you want to watch that movie, wear those \u2018weird\u2019 trousers, watch a movie instead of football or go for a walk at 3AM? If the answer is yes, then that is what you really want and you should pursue it! <\/span><\/p>\n

Turn off other people’s thoughts in your head and turn on your own. Once you <\/span>dejar de buscar aprobaci\u00f3n<\/span> and start creating your own rules and making your own choices, you’ll realize the beauty of your own being.<\/span><\/p>\n

3. Eval\u00fae sus tareas y acciones<\/h2>\n

\"mujer<\/p>\n

Para evitar buscar la aprobaci\u00f3n de los dem\u00e1s, debes evaluar tus tareas y acciones. <\/span><\/p>\n

Whenever you’re about to do something, ask yourself whether you are doing it because you believe it’s the right thing to do or if you’re doing it for the sake of seeking other people’s approval. <\/span><\/p>\n

Make a list of the things that you suspect you’re doing only to seek validation and make sure to avoid doing those things in the future. The most important thing is to become aware of your own words and actions.<\/span><\/p>\n

Once you target that you’re doing something just because you want to please others and get their approval, it will be easier for you to stop doing it. <\/span><\/p>\n

La mayor\u00eda de las veces, las personas ni siquiera son conscientes de que est\u00e1n haciendo algo s\u00f3lo por los dem\u00e1s, as\u00ed que una vez que seas consciente de ello, la mitad de tu trabajo estar\u00e1 hecho. <\/span><\/p>\n

Lo que ocurre cuando dejas de buscar la validaci\u00f3n de los dem\u00e1s<\/h2>\n

\"mujer<\/p>\n

En una palabra (vale, dos palabras): la felicidad sucede. Una vez que dejas de buscar validaci\u00f3n y reconocimiento, empiezas a validarte y apreciarte a ti mismo. <\/span><\/p>\n

You trust your gut, you start doing things that fulfill you and you feel FREE. You no longer avoid doing things that make you happy just because someone else doesn’t approve of them. <\/span><\/p>\n

Descubres qui\u00e9n eres realmente y qu\u00e9 te importa de verdad en la vida y te comprometes con esas cosas.<\/span><\/p>\n

Tus pasiones, tus sue\u00f1os y deseos alcanzan su punto \u00e1lgido y por fin te sientes participante activo en tu vida en lugar de pasivo.<\/span><\/p>\n

Te sientes con confianza para ampliar tus horizontes, probar cosas nuevas, salir de tu zona de confort, asumir m\u00e1s riesgos y enfrentarte a tus miedos. <\/i><\/b><\/p>\n

Su autodescubrimiento y <\/span>amor propio<\/span> te ayudar\u00e1 a convertirte en la mejor versi\u00f3n de ti mismo porque por fin sabr\u00e1s lo que realmente quieres en tu vida, lo que te ilusiona y lo que te hace ser t\u00fa. <\/span><\/p>\n

Empiezas a apreciar todas tus rarezas y defectos y <\/span>abraza tus imperfecciones<\/span><\/a> because you know that’s what makes you truly special.<\/span><\/p>\n

You learn to respect other people’s opinions instead of worrying about them because you finally have your own.<\/span><\/p>\n

Una vez que dejas de buscar la validaci\u00f3n de otras personas, abres las puertas a grandes oportunidades, retos, emoci\u00f3n y libertad.<\/span><\/p>\n

Por fin te das cuenta de que lo \u00fanico que te imped\u00eda alcanzar la verdadera felicidad eras t\u00fa y no los dem\u00e1s.<\/span><\/p>\n

V\u00e9ase tambi\u00e9n: <\/span>7 cosas incre\u00edbles que ocurren cuando deja de importarte una mierda lo que piensen los dem\u00e1s<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n

\"C\u00f3mo<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Seeking validation from others is one of the biggest enemies of every human being because the need for the approval of others kills freedom and blocks your true self.  This is what is happening inside the mind of a person who is prone to validation seeking: “If I wear that one outfit, my date will…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":20,"featured_media":85446,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29636],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-85441","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-self-help"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29636,"label":"self help"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/06\/How-To-Stop-Seeking-Validation-From-Others-To-Start-Flourishing.jpg",800,534,false],"author_info":{"display_name":"Christine Keller","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/author\/christine\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29636,"name":"self help","slug":"self-help","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29636,"taxonomy":"category","description":"Whenever you feel lost or hurt in love and life, these self-help tips will help you overcome challenges and make you feel better instantly.","parent":22911,"count":314,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29636,"category_count":314,"category_description":"Whenever you feel lost or hurt in love and life, these self-help tips will help you overcome challenges and make you feel better instantly.","cat_name":"self help","category_nicename":"self-help","category_parent":22911}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/85441","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/20"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=85441"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/85441\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/85446"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=85441"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=85441"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/es\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=85441"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}