{"id":10484,"date":"2017-12-18T08:11:05","date_gmt":"2017-12-18T08:11:05","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/herway.net\/?p=10484"},"modified":"2021-08-12T12:38:08","modified_gmt":"2021-08-12T12:38:08","slug":"finalmente-capire-che-lamore-non-deve-distruggere","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/finalmente-capire-che-lamore-non-deve-distruggere\/","title":{"rendered":"Finalmente ho capito che l'amore non deve distruggerti"},"content":{"rendered":"

I never saw myself as an expert in love or someone who\u2019s fit to give others advice when it comes to love, but thanks to the hell I\u2019ve been through and the hell I\u2019ve put myself through, I think I might be able to help someone by telling my story and actually help myself if I start listening to my mind as well from time to time instead of pursuing my heart. <\/span><\/p>\n

I\u2019ve made a few wrong turns in my life and I\u2019ve loved a few wrong guys here and there as well. I don\u2019t want to beat myself up because who hasn\u2019t? I believe you\u2019ve done the same as me, too. You\u2019ve also fallen for someone head over heels just to see he isn\u2019t good for you. And instead of stopping yourself, you ended up falling even harder because you just couldn\u2019t make your heart listen. <\/span><\/p>\n

I never consulted with my brain before I made a decision. I was always running after my heart. I guess that\u2019s why I got my heart broken so many times. I kept convincing myself with each new story that things will be different, but the odds never ended up being in my favor and at the end of each \u2018love\u2019 story of mine, I ended up being the one that got her heart broken. <\/span><\/p>\n

I bet you too went through the same hell as me. I\u2019m even sure you\u2019re the one that allowed herself to fall for someone\u2014even though you knew he\u2019s bad for you. You knew he\u2019s bad, but you couldn\u2019t stop yourself. You fell even harder than you normally would have and you ended up loving a guy who\u2019s everything but good for you. <\/span><\/p>\n

There is something wrong with us that makes us want even more those who\u2019re toxic to us. It\u2019s like there is this voice in our head telling us: \u201cFall for him, it\u2019s going to be fun\u201d. And as much adventurous as it gets to fall for the persona sbagliata<\/a>, finisce sempre per avere gravi conseguenze. <\/b><\/p>\n

We even dare to call it love, but it\u2019s never love. If the guy is wrong and the feeling is off and you\u2019re more often down than you\u2019re high on love, then it is not love. Don\u2019t allow yourself to get addicted to the pain of a toxic relationship. Don\u2019t allow yourself to put all your effort into a relationship that doesn\u2019t have a future and don\u2019t give the best of yourself to someone who won\u2019t know what to do with it. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cNo pain, no gain\u201d is a slogan used in gyms, not a slogan that will help you in love. Love isn\u2019t supposed to hurt that much, you know. <\/b><\/p>\n

It\u2019 okay to fight for the love that makes sense, but if nothing about him makes sense, why would you give him the power to break you? Why would you go through all the pain in one relationship just to see something that was more than obvious in the beginning\u2014it just wasn\u2019t meant to work out.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"Ragazza<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I know you\u2019ve convinced yourself that what the two of you have is love and it\u2019s probably because you see it that way. I know you see only good in others and I know you probably won\u2019t change. But I don\u2019t think he feels as same as you do. I don\u2019t think he\u2019s in it for better or for worse. <\/b><\/p>\n

Credo che ami solo la sensazione di essere amato. Le vostre attenzioni gli vanno a genio e adora la spinta dell'ego che riceve da voi, ma tesoro, that’s not love.<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n

This isn\u2019t love. Love isn\u2019t supposed to break you piece by piece until there is nothing more left of you. Love isn\u2019t supposed to make you cry at night or wonder during the day where is he and if he\u2019s giving all that you deserve to someone else. <\/span><\/p>\n

Love isn\u2019t supposed to make you doubt yourself. Love isn\u2019t supposed to make you feel like you\u2019re not good enough or like you\u2019re replaceable. Love isn\u2019t supposed to demolish your self-worth. Love isn\u2019t supposed to bring you down and love shouldn\u2019t leave your heart bleeding. Love isn\u2019t supposed to be about only him and love shouldn\u2019t make you feel like you don\u2019t matter. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cLove isn\u2019t this adrenaline rush of emotions. Love isn’t tearing someone apart. Love isn\u2019t pain. Love isn\u2019t confusion. Love doesn\u2019t leave you wondering. Love isn\u2019t trying so hard to keep someone\u2019s attention. Love is simple. Love is supposed to build you up and not knock you down. Love is supposed to fill you and not leave you empty as you sacrifice parts of yourself to appease them.\u201d – Kirsten Corley<\/span><\/p>\n

Trust me, I\u2019ve been in your shoes, but you haven\u2019t been in mine. I was also blindly in love and I did everything I could to make it work. But sometimes you miss those toxic signs in the beginning and even if you don\u2019t, you find yourself falling for someone who\u2019s never gonna fall for you as much. And when things come to an end, and they always do if love isn\u2019t right, you end up being completely broken or destroyed.<\/span><\/p>\n

I know you think you love him and that he loves you. But that isn\u2019t il vero amore.<\/a> Because if it was, it would be tearing you down piece by piece. It wouldn\u2019t leave you confused or wondering. You wouldn\u2019t be trying to catch his attention or try too hard. And I know you have a hard time hearing this because you\u2019re probably not ready to hear this yet and these words will come to your mind only when you\u2019re ready to hear them. But I see it clearly, and I know how things are going to end up because I\u2019ve been there.<\/span><\/p>\n

You\u2019re changing more and more each day. And as each day passes, you look less like you and more like he wants you to. And in a few days, weeks or months, you\u2019ll look yourself in the mirror and you\u2019ll see a stranger staring back at you. And I don\u2019t want that to happen to you. So don\u2019t let it. Don\u2019t lose yourself for something that isn\u2019t love. <\/b><\/p>\n

Love is so much more than this and love isn’t supposed to destroy you. If you’re ready to give the best of you to love, make sure you’re giving it to the right guy. Only then will it be worthwhile. <\/span><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I never saw myself as an expert in love or someone who\u2019s fit to give others advice when it comes to love, but thanks to the hell I\u2019ve been through and the hell I\u2019ve put myself through, I think I might be able to help someone by telling my story and actually help myself if…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":53,"featured_media":10486,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29614],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-10484","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-love-talks"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29614,"label":"love talks"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/ilya-yakover-369885.jpg",800,533,false],"author_info":{"display_name":"Ariel Quinn","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/author\/ariel\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29614,"name":"love talks","slug":"love-talks","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29614,"taxonomy":"category","description":"What is love? How does it affect us? How to know someone loves you or show someone you love them? What types of love are there? Learn all that and much more.","parent":38,"count":426,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29614,"category_count":426,"category_description":"What is love? How does it affect us? How to know someone loves you or show someone you love them? What types of love are there? Learn all that and much more.","cat_name":"love talks","category_nicename":"love-talks","category_parent":38}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10484","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/53"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=10484"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10484\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/10486"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=10484"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=10484"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=10484"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}