{"id":14633,"date":"2018-02-16T08:02:15","date_gmt":"2018-02-16T08:02:15","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/herway.net\/?p=14633"},"modified":"2021-08-12T11:38:14","modified_gmt":"2021-08-12T11:38:14","slug":"rendere-la-realta-migliore-dei-sogni","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/rendere-la-realta-migliore-dei-sogni\/","title":{"rendered":"Rendete la realt\u00e0 migliore dei vostri sogni"},"content":{"rendered":"

Love is when you don’t want to sleep, because reality is better than a dream. \u2013 Unknown<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

When we\u2019re younger, we develop a fantastical mindset that we will one day grow up, have a home of our own with a white picket fence, a successful career \u2013 usually something in the medical or entertainment fields \u2013 a loving partner, and children. These ideals are established at an early age by our caregivers, the environment we grow up in, or, at the very least, the media.<\/p>\n

By the time we enter into that idealized stage of our life, however, it often comes with some sobering realities. Even if we\u2019ve taken years of acting classes or graduated with a nursing degree, it\u2019s much more difficult to garner success than we expected. We may have a home, but chances are it does not have that proverbial picket fence of our dreams. Davvero, quanti lo fanno?<\/em><\/p>\n

Potremmo aver vissuto una serie di relazioni fallite, essere stati una spalla su cui piangere per i nostri amici mentre attraversavano le loro e aver capito che i principi azzurri sono pi\u00f9 difficili da trovare di quanto ci aspettassimo. Potremmo non capire what \u2018love\u2019 even means<\/a>.<\/p>\n

There are numerous reasons why we set these expectations for ourselves, only to feel sorely mistaken later in life. Let\u2019s take a look at a few.<\/p>\n

Genitori narcisisti.<\/strong><\/em> Sometimes the environment in which we were raised was less than ideal. We could have been at the mercy of narcissistic parents, or those who had similar personality disorders. This typically means we were at their constant beck and call. Everything we did was essentially so our caregivers could live vicariously through us. And, despite all of our efforts, we never felt good enough. This is because we were constantly told we weren\u2019t behind closed doors. We were mentally and emotionally abused, probably physically, too. It\u2019s very difficult to break the chains of childhood narcissistic abuse, and often, victims mirror these traits in adulthood, hoping to obtain the perfection they consistently strived for without success.<\/p>\n

Sfuggire a una realt\u00e0 dolorosa.<\/strong><\/em> Ci sono anche quelli che hanno sperimentato altre forme di disfunzione infantile. Quando i genitori sono tossicodipendenti, sopravvissuti agli abusi<\/a> who, almost systematically, repeat the cycle, or are battling extreme anxiety or depression, this creates an unstable, feared reality for children. In the aftermath of maturing amid chaos, we may find ourselves equally fearful, anxious, or depressed. Therefore, we attempt to create a fantastical reality in adulthood that\u2019ll help to suppress our memories.<\/p>\n

Sfuggire alle circostanze sociali.<\/strong> <\/em>Children who grow up in poverty tend to escape this reality mentally through idealization of what life will be like when they finally \u2018get out\u2019. By believing that we will one day break the cycle, and doing everything possible to do so, we are hoping to prove we are more than the hand we\u2019ve been dealt. However, this can come with a dark side, and that is a continued thirst for wealth and upper-class luxuries. Lust and greed can come with some nasty consequences. Remember the saying, \u2018Only the greedy get caught\u2019?<\/strong> Sometimes, individuals who get caught up in the \u2018money game\u2019 employ some seedy methods to obtain their fame and fortune, such as developing gambling, sex, or substance addictions.<\/p>\n

Rivalit\u00e0 tra fratelli.<\/strong> <\/em>In some situations, there was a brother or sister who we became determined to \u2018beat\u2019 early on and we continue to do so regardless of the stage of life we are in. This could be a self-imposed internal competition or one that is actually verbalized to the target. Regardless, it typically stems from jealousy and insufficient self-esteem. Creating rivalries with anyone else is derived from self-discontentment which need to be addressed. Per realizzare la vera felicit\u00e0<\/a>dobbiamo avere un sano livello di fiducia in noi stessi.<\/strong> Normally, competition of this nature leaves a void and no matter how much we achieve, we can never be satisfied. Consider the principle of self-actualization in Maslow\u2019s Hierarchy of Needs. This is at the top of the pyramid because only when we reach a stage in which we are self-actualized, do we feel complete contentment and we have, theoretically, met our fullest potential. We cannot feel this internal satisfaction by living in constant competition with others.<\/p>\n

Fissazione per la fama.<\/strong> <\/em>Quite commonly, children become fixated, for a number of different reasons, on the lifestyles depicted in the books they read, or the television shows and movies they watch. The storylines become goals that are sought later in life. What is missing from these earliest influences, however, is any pain or suffering the protagonists endure. Essentially, they are completely dehumanized and we only see the sunny side. This, of course, is purposeful. Children shouldn\u2019t have to worry about the same things as adults. But, non possiamo aspettarci di essere disumanizzati anche quando maturiamo e viviamo in una favola.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Because children are so impressionable, and the earliest years of our lives are so influential, it can be difficult to break away from the idealistic norms we feel we \u2018deserve\u2019. However, we must find peace in the reality that we may not achieve every ideal we believe we will before we\u2019re able to know any better. The truth is, we don\u2019t have to<\/strong><\/em>. La vita \u00e8 imperfetta, dopo tutto, e c'\u00e8 bellezza in questa imperfezione. Il costante bisogno di scalare le vette o il desiderio di superare gli altri ci lascer\u00e0 solo insoddisfatti. \u00c8 vero che dobbiamo amare noi stessi prima di poter amare gli altri. Imparare ad amare se stessi<\/strong> <\/em>e tutto il resto andr\u00e0 al suo posto.<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Love is when you don’t want to sleep, because reality is better than a dream. \u2013 Unknown When we\u2019re younger, we develop a fantastical mindset that we will one day grow up, have a home of our own with a white picket fence, a successful career \u2013 usually something in the medical or entertainment fields…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":20,"featured_media":14637,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29636],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-14633","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-self-help"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29636,"label":"self help"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/02\/mohamed-nohassi-438188.jpg",800,564,false],"author_info":{"display_name":"Christine Keller","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/author\/christine\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29636,"name":"self help","slug":"self-help","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29636,"taxonomy":"category","description":"Whenever you feel lost or hurt in love and life, these self-help tips will help you overcome challenges and make you feel better instantly.","parent":22911,"count":314,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29636,"category_count":314,"category_description":"Whenever you feel lost or hurt in love and life, these self-help tips will help you overcome challenges and make you feel better instantly.","cat_name":"self help","category_nicename":"self-help","category_parent":22911}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14633","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/20"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=14633"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14633\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/14637"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=14633"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=14633"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=14633"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}