{"id":146773,"date":"2022-03-08T12:41:09","date_gmt":"2022-03-08T12:41:09","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/herway.net\/?p=146773"},"modified":"2022-06-20T23:57:33","modified_gmt":"2022-06-20T23:57:33","slug":"le-persone-ti-usano","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/le-persone-ti-usano\/","title":{"rendered":"Le persone ti usano? 10 modi per capirlo e 5 modi per fermarlo"},"content":{"rendered":"

It’s not only romantic relationships that can bring you to the point where you’ve had enough. Relazioni tossiche<\/a> pu\u00f2 esistere tra amici, colleghi di lavoro o familiari.<\/p>\n

If they act like it goes without saying that you’ll do whatever they want, there’s a great chance that they might be using you.<\/p>\n

When people use you, it can lead to you feeling like you’re trapped in a relationship that’s making you unhappy, but you continue it for one reason or another.<\/strong><\/p>\n

We’ll see how to tell if someone is using you, why people use you, and what to do if it happens to you.<\/p>\n

Perch\u00e9 le persone si rivolgono a voi?<\/h2>\n

Le persone egoiste vi usano per soddisfare i propri bisogni.<\/p>\n

In un relazione sana<\/b><\/a> \u2013 built on a foundation of respect, empathy, and communication \u2013 both people incontrarsi<\/em> each other’s needs.<\/strong> L'uguaglianza e la gentilezza informano ogni aspetto di questa relazione.<\/p>\n

People who use others for their own gain while disregarding your feelings think they’re entitled to everything they take from you without giving anything back.<\/p>\n

Some of them do it on purpose, and some don’t even realize that how they use people is wrong.<\/strong><\/p>\n

In ogni caso, ci sono alcuni tratti e comportamenti che spesso si possono osservare nelle persone che si approfittano degli altri.<\/p>\n

\u2022 SELFISHNESS<\/h3>\n

Alcune persone sono semplicemente egoiste e ingrate. Cercano qualsiasi occasione per ottenere qualcosa in cambio di nulla.<\/strong><\/p>\n

La prima volta che si offre un persona egoista<\/a> anything, they immediately decide it’s their right from then on. They start to demand it and take for granted that you will provide it.<\/p>\n

Per loro la gentilezza \u00e8 sempre un invito a usare la persona che la offre.<\/strong> They never stop to think about what it’s like for the other person.<\/p>\n

Ad esempio, un familiare che d\u00e0 per scontato di dover stare da voi ogni volta che si trova in citt\u00e0 per lavoro.<\/p>\n

Non si fermano mai a chiedere o a considerare che potrebbero arrecarvi disturbo.<\/strong><\/p>\n

No matter whether you really can’t do them a favor or are just trying to stare lontano dalle persone egoiste<\/a>Se gli dici di no una volta, si arrabbiano perch\u00e9 gli rovini i piani.<\/p>\n

\"Attenzione<\/p>\n

\u2022 INSECURITY<\/h3>\n

L'insicurezza \u00e8 una sensazione di inferiorit\u00e0 o inadeguatezza, una mancanza di fiducia in se stessi e un senso di isolamento. La maggior parte delle persone a volte si sente cos\u00ec in una certa misura.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Le persone estremamente insicure si sentono ostili, pessimiste e bisognose.<\/p>\n

Possono finire per indirizzare i loro sentimenti nelle loro relazioni e trasformarsi in persone manipolatrici<\/b><\/a> che usano la loro insicurezza come scusa per infierire sugli altri.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Prendiamo ad esempio un amico che vi fa sentire male con voi stessi ogni volta che lo vedete. La vostra giornata stava andando bene e all'improvviso sentite ansia e dubbi su voi stessi.<\/p>\n

If you’re usually not insecure but only around this person, they might be projecting their insecurities onto you to make themselves feel better.<\/p>\n

Questi sono falsi amici<\/b><\/a> che frequentano te solo per renderti infelice come lo \u00e8 la loro vita.<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u2022 POWERLESSNESS<\/h3>\n

Quando alcune persone mancano di controllo in alcune aree della loro vita, diventano prepotenti in altre.<\/p>\n

Infuriated by their powerlessness, such people look for an outlet where they can get it, and it’s usually on someone who shows them kindness.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Un esempio \u00e8 rappresentato da un marito egoista<\/a> who has problems at work and can’t do anything about it. This frustrates him, and he takes it out on his family.<\/p>\n

Quando torna a casa, \u00e8 esigente, negligente e manipolatore con la moglie. L'insoddisfazione per le circostanze in cui si trova e l'incapacit\u00e0 di fare qualcosa al riguardo lo trasformano in un abusatore emotivo<\/a>.<\/p>\n

\u2022 NARCISSISM<\/h3>\n

Alla base del narcisismo c'\u00e8 una bassa autostima. I narcisisti coprono questi sentimenti con un estremo senso di diritto e di superiorit\u00e0.<\/strong><\/p>\n

They believe they deserve certain things and that it’s other people’s obligation to obey them. Per suscitare ammirazione, si vantano dei loro risultati e li esagerano.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Per esempio, un collega che si prende il merito di un progetto in cui \u00e8 stato coinvolto solo marginalmente, pur essendo assolutamente convinto della propria storia.<\/p>\n

Narcissists have no friends. They live in a fantasy world where they\u2019re the best at everything, and others don\u2019t matter.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Il collega in questione potrebbe essere convinto che il suo contributo sia stato fondamentale e infuriarsi se qualcuno suggerisce il contrario.<\/p>\n

Come si fa a sapere quando qualcuno ti sta usando? 10 segni<\/h2>\n

If someone is using you, there’s a high probability that you’re already aware of it. Persone tossiche<\/b><\/a> aren’t your true friends, and eventually, this comes to light.<\/strong><\/p>\n

All'inizio una persona del genere pu\u00f2 sembrare una persona gentile, ma col tempo ci si rende conto che c'\u00e8 qualcosa che non va.<\/p>\n

Potrebbero comportarsi come il vostro migliore amico un momento e mostrare comportamento passivo-aggressivo<\/b><\/a> il prossimo.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Uscire con questa persona diventa un lavoro faticoso e vi mette ansia.<\/p>\n

Is this person using you? Here’s how to tell when people use you.<\/p>\n

\"Conoscere<\/p>\n

1. It’s all about them<\/h3>\n

When you begin to notice that your relationship is focused only on them, you’ll know for sure that someone is using you.<\/p>\n

Tutto ruota intorno ai loro desideri, interessi e umori.<\/strong> You’re always accommodating only one person, and they’re never around when you need them.<\/p>\n

Ad un certo punto, ci si rende conto che loro vedono se stessi come il personaggio principale e voi come la loro spalla.<\/strong>. You’re always doing what they want to do and going where they want to go.<\/p>\n

Queste persone pensano che gli altri siano del tutto privi di importanza e che, fondamentalmente, chiunque vada bene purch\u00e9 li serva.<\/p>\n

2. They don’t listen<\/h3>\n

Your role in the relationship is to listen to their tales of their own brilliance and rants about anyone who doesn’t act in accordance with their expectations.<\/p>\n

You’re there as an audience. Such a person won’t listen to you but expect you to listen to them.<\/strong><\/p>\n

They don’t really know anything about you because on the rare chance you get the opportunity to talk about yourself, they don’t pay attention.<\/p>\n

The only interest in your life they ever show is feigned when they’re trying to placate you if they imagine you might start to rebel.<\/strong><\/p>\n

3. They’re in charge of the relationship<\/h3>\n

You’ll know you’re dealing with a persona tossica<\/a> se non si pu\u00f2 mai fare nulla alle proprie condizioni.<\/p>\n

You only hang out when it’s convenient for them.<\/strong> They don’t have the time, or they’re doing something more important.<\/p>\n

Usually, they only contact you when their other friends are busy, or if it’s a romantic partner, they only call when they want to hook up.<\/p>\n

You find out that they exclude you from things, and they feel entitled to join in whatever you’re doing.<\/p>\n

Questo tipo di comportamento di controllo non trova posto in una buona relazione.<\/strong><\/p>\n

4. Vogliono sempre qualcosa<\/h3>\n

A friend of yours disappears during a hard time when you need them most. No texts, no phone calls. When you run into each other, not even a “How are you?” as a matter of courtesy.<\/p>\n

Potreste sentirvi feriti fino a quando la distanza non vi far\u00e0 guardare indietro e capire che durante tutto il vostro amicizia apparente<\/b><\/a>Questa persona ti stava usando.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Si rivolgono a loro solo quando hanno bisogno di qualcosa, che sia denaro, compagnia o attenzione.<\/p>\n

They never spend time with you without expecting something, so when you can\u2019t do anything for them, they\u2019re gone.<\/strong><\/p>\n

E se osate negare loro ci\u00f2 che vogliono o chiedere qualcosa in cambio, reagiscono con rabbia e indignazione.<\/p>\n

\"<\/p>\n

5. Si paga sempre<\/h3>\n

Questa \u00e8 una cosa ovvia. A person who’s using you probably never reaches for their wallet when it’s time to pay.<\/strong><\/p>\n

It might happen little by little. At first, they only pay their own share, and then they forget their wallet a lot, then it becomes expected that it’s on you.<\/p>\n

Chiedono un prestito e, per dimostrare di essere buoni amici, promettono di restituire i soldi.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Non lo fanno mai, ovviamente.<\/p>\n

6. They don’t appreciate you<\/h3>\n

Nelle relazioni paritarie, entrambe le persone considerano l'altro un valore, not because of things they can get out of each other, but because they’re both people and deserve respect.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Se li aiutate o fate loro un favore, l'altra persona vi mostrer\u00e0 gratitudine e cercher\u00e0 un modo per rendere felici anche voi.<\/p>\n

Le persone che ti usano non mostrano mai alcun apprezzamento.<\/strong> They don\u2019t do anything thoughtful, don\u2019t offer any support when you need it, and don’t make any effort when it comes to you.<\/p>\n

Si comportano come se qualsiasi cosa facciate per loro fosse dovuta e pretendono solo di pi\u00f9 senza vergognarsi.<\/strong><\/p>\n

7. They’re manipulative<\/h3>\n

Chi cerca di sfruttarvi per trarne profitto \u00e8 disposto a manipolarvi in vari modi.<\/p>\n

For instance, they’ll do something small and then make it seem like they did you a huge favor and make you feel like you’re indebted to them.<\/strong><\/p>\n

They’ll act nice when they need something but won’t think twice before betraying your trust if it suits them.<\/p>\n

Una persona manipolatrice cercher\u00e0 i vostri punti vulnerabili cercando di minare il vostro <\/b>autostima<\/b><\/a> per rendervi pi\u00f9 facili da controllare.<\/strong><\/p>\n

8. They’re all talk<\/h3>\n

I vostri sentimenti, il vostro comfort e well-being aren’t important<\/a> a chi usa gli altri, solo per il proprio tornaconto.<\/p>\n

They lack empathy and don’t think of other people’s needs, so they’ll never actually contribute to your relationship in any way.<\/strong><\/p>\n

They’ll make plans with you and forget them instantly or say they’ll do something, but it never happens. If you ask for something, they’ll say ok but ignore your wishes.<\/p>\n

They’re going to do as little as possible for you, only what’s absolutely necessary to get what they want.<\/strong><\/p>\n

At some point, you’ll realize they’re liars and stop taking them seriously. After breaking their promises so many times, it’s obvious that you can’t trust them.<\/p>\n

\"A<\/p>\n

9. They don\u2019t respect your boundaries<\/h3>\n

If someone is using you, you’ll notice that they have no regard for your boundaries. They don’t care about what you want or don’t want, and your self-respect is irrelevant to them.<\/strong><\/p>\n

When they want something that you consider unacceptable, they’ll ignore you. They don’t take no for an answer, and they’ll manipulate you so you can\u2019t say no.<\/p>\n

Such people won’t hesitate to senso di colpa<\/b><\/a> ti costringono a fare ci\u00f2 che vogliono.<\/strong> If you show resistance, they’ll gaslight you until you start doubting yourself and wondering if they’re right after all.<\/p>\n

If you say something about their behavior, a toxic person will get defensive and turn it back on you, making you feel like you’re the problem.<\/strong><\/p>\n

10. You feel they’re using you<\/h3>\n

Il segno pi\u00f9 evidente che qualcuno vi sta usando sono i vostri sentimenti.<\/p>\n

Quando le persone ti usano, inizi a provare risentimento nei loro confronti.<\/strong> Potrebbero presentare la vostra relazione come normale, ma fidatevi del vostro istinto.<\/p>\n

Sentirsi a disagio e a disagio con qualcuno di solito accade per un motivo. When our intuition tells us something, it usually means we’ve come to a conclusion without consciously thinking about it.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Se qualcuno si approfitta della vostra gentilezza, finge di preoccuparsi <\/a> for you, and ignores your feelings, eventually, you’ll start to dislike them.<\/p>\n

A questo punto, potreste iniziare a chiedervi dove andare a parare.<\/p>\n

Cosa fare se qualcuno vi sta usando? 5 modi per porre fine alla situazione<\/h2>\n

When you’ve ne ha abbastanza di una relazione tossica<\/a>, you shouldn’t let the person who used you turn you away from kindness but inspire you to ask for respect.<\/p>\n

Kindness isn’t a flaw. Most people react to it with happiness and spread that kindness to others.<\/strong><\/p>\n

There are some people, relationships, and experiences that might make it seem like compassion is for suckers, but don’t let them discourage you from being kind.<\/p>\n

Come affrontare le persone che vi usano<\/strong><\/p>\n

The scope of the problem might be different if you’re dealing with a moglie egoista<\/a> o una persona cattiva a caso che vi ha fatto soffrire, ma in genere i passaggi sono gli stessi.<\/p>\n

1. Realize you’re more than what you can do for someone<\/h3>\n

You’re good enough as you are. Just because you can do something doesn’t mean that you have to!<\/p>\n

A person’s worth isn’t measured in what they can do for anyone else.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Il vostro tempo, la vostra attenzione, le vostre risorse o il vostro amore devono essere dati liberamente e non per senso del dovere. It’s your choice what you accept and what you reject.<\/strong><\/p>\n

It’s incredibly important for your self-worth to realize that you don’t owe anyone anything.<\/p>\n

2. Creare e far rispettare i confini<\/h3>\n

It’s often the kindest people who get taken advantage of, but it doesn’t mean that being kind automatically makes you a pushover or a target.<\/p>\n

Imparate a dire di no.<\/strong><\/p>\n

First of all, you need to know your boundaries: what are the things you need and want, and what won’t you accept?<\/p>\n

Si pu\u00f2 comunque essere generosi e disponibili, pur chiedendo alle persone di rispettare i propri limiti.<\/strong> Siate cortesi, ma mantenete le vostre posizioni.<\/p>\n

\"<\/p>\n

3. Aspettarsi relazioni paritarie<\/h3>\n

Se pensate che la persona che vi sta usando possa diventare un vero amico ad un certo punto, probabilmente volete sistemare e non chiudere la relazione.<\/p>\n

Potete iniziare affrontando i vostri problemi. Richiamare la persona, ricordarle che il rispetto \u00e8 un <\/b>strada a doppio senso<\/b><\/a> e chiedere le scuse e un cambiamento di comportamento.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Some people who use others aren’t really malicious about it, and there might be hope for change.<\/p>\n

Concentrate comunque la vostra attenzione sulle loro azioni piuttosto che sulle loro parole.<\/strong><\/p>\n

4. Chiedere ci\u00f2 di cui si ha bisogno<\/h3>\n

Chiedere ci\u00f2 di cui si ha bisogno \u00e8 autocura emotiva<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Everyone has needs to be met, but until we make them known, other people won’t know what they are.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Nella maggior parte dei casi, le persone in una relazione sana saranno felici di fornire le cose di cui l'altra persona ha bisogno.<\/p>\n

For instance, your need for personal space, the need to talk to another person when you’re having a hard time, or asking someone to respect your opinion.<\/p>\n

Se volete ottenere ci\u00f2 che vi serve, parlate a voce alta.<\/strong><\/p>\n

5. Allontanarsi<\/h3>\n

There might come a point when you realize that there’s no helping it and that you’ll only be miserable if you continue the relationship.<\/p>\n

You’re done with the other person, and it’s time to tagliarli<\/a> per il bene della vostra salute mentale.<\/p>\n

It’s never wrong to remove yourself from a situation or a relationship that makes you unhappy.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Trust your instincts. You can tell if the other person has your best interests at heart or if they’re only there to take advantage.<\/p>\n

If they don’t feel bad using you, you shouldn’t feel bad allontanarsi<\/b><\/a>.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Quando le persone ti usano Citazioni<\/em><\/h2>\n

1. \u201cThe opposite of love is not hate; it is use. Use is the abuse of love; in fact, it betrays love. When we use another person, we place their needs below our own, but worse yet, we place their value and dignity below ours.\u201c<\/em> \u2015 Leah Darrow<\/p>\n

2. \u201cWhat most people need to learn in life is how to love people and use things instead of using people and loving things.\u201c<\/em> \u2014 Zelda Fitzgerald<\/p>\n

3. \u201cTrust is built when someone is vulnerable and not taken advantage of.\u201c<\/em> \u2014 Bob Vanourek<\/strong><\/p>\n

4. \u201cSpend your time with those who love you unconditionally, not with those who only love you under certain conditions.\u201c<\/em> \u2015 Suzy Kassem<\/p>\n

5. \u201cPeople know who they can walk over and who they can\u2019t. If someone is walking all over you it\u2019s because they know you\u2019ll put up with it.\u201c<\/em> \u2014 Sonya Parker<\/p>\n

6. \u201cI\u2019ve grown tired of being used; And I\u2019m sick and tired of being accused; Now I\u2019m walking away from you; And I\u2019m not coming back.\u201c<\/em> \u2014 James Morrison<\/strong><\/p>\n

7. \u201cIf you don\u2019t get the better of yourself, someone else will.\u201c \u2014 Evan Esar<\/p>\n

8. \u201cImmature love says: I love you because I need you. Mature love says: I need you because I love you.\u201c<\/em> \u2014 Erich Fromm<\/strong><\/p>\n

9. \u201cThere is no such thing as a people who are all wicked or even all good. Everyone chooses. But even they, even they looked at people and saw only tools. No one is a cup for another to drink from.\u201c<\/em> \u2015 Catherynne M. Valente<\/p>\n

10. \u201cThe more you are at everyone else\u2019s disposal, the more you will feel like garbage.\u201c<\/em> \u2014 Christine E. Szymanski<\/p>\n

Vedi anche: Perch\u00e9 sono tutti cos\u00ec cattivi con me? Non sei tu. (O forse s\u00ec?)<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n

In breve<\/h2>\n

Quando le persone ti usano, pu\u00f2 essere fastidioso nel migliore dei casi e dannoso dal punto di vista emotivo nel peggiore.<\/p>\n

Nelle persone che si approfittano degli altri, spesso si nota un certo modello di comportamento: egoismo, mancanza di apprezzamento e tendenza a manipolare.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Per proteggere se stessi ed essere comunque in grado di offrire gentilezza agli altri, si pu\u00f2 proteggere se stessi mantenendo saldi i propri confini personali.<\/p>\n

Quando chiedete costantemente di essere rispettati, le persone inizieranno a dare pi\u00f9 valore a ci\u00f2 che date loro e coloro che vogliono usarvi avranno difficolt\u00e0 a farlo.<\/strong><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It’s not only romantic relationships that can bring you to the point where you’ve had enough. Toxic relationships can exist between friends, co-workers, or family members. If they act like it goes without saying that you’ll do whatever they want, there’s a great chance that they might be using you. When people use you, it…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":20,"featured_media":146801,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29625],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-146773","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-toxic-relationship"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29625,"label":"toxic relationship"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/03\/Do-People-Use-You-10-Ways-To-Tell-And-5-Ways-To-Stop-It-1024x684.jpg",1024,684,true],"author_info":{"display_name":"Christine Keller","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/author\/christine\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29625,"name":"toxic relationship","slug":"toxic-relationship","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29625,"taxonomy":"category","description":"Are you in a toxic relationship without even knowing it? What should you do if you find yourself in one? Here's all you need to know!","parent":29620,"count":228,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29625,"category_count":228,"category_description":"Are you in a toxic relationship without even knowing it? What should you do if you find yourself in one? Here's all you need to know!","cat_name":"toxic relationship","category_nicename":"toxic-relationship","category_parent":29620}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/146773","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/20"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=146773"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/146773\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/146801"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=146773"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=146773"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=146773"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}