{"id":165123,"date":"2024-06-04T12:38:57","date_gmt":"2024-06-04T12:38:57","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/herway.net\/?p=165123"},"modified":"2024-06-04T12:38:58","modified_gmt":"2024-06-04T12:38:58","slug":"perche-i-matrimoni-finiscono","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/perche-i-matrimoni-finiscono\/","title":{"rendered":"Una donna espone la condizione maschile che pu\u00f2 sabotare il matrimonio e nessun umorismo pu\u00f2 risolverla"},"content":{"rendered":"

That day I got furious because he had forgotten to stop by Target AGAIN, and get the ingredients for my cake. It was for our son\u2019s birthday and I planned to make a cake the day before. I gridavano e lo chiamavano per nome e notavano che il suo viso era tutto raggrinzito.<\/strong> but he didn\u2019t say anything.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

After a few weeks, his colleague\u2019s wife told me they had a very upsetting situation at work. He was stressed out and disappointed but wouldn’t say a word about it<\/strong>. Se solo mi avesse detto cosa \u00e8 successo. Avrei capito e l'avrei sostenuto.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s a well-known fact: men are incapable of speaking about their emotions. A male vocabulary doesn\u2019t contain words that describe their inner impressions<\/strong> e sentimenti.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gurl, pay attention \u2013 lack of verbal exchange creates a crack in your relationship!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Le relazioni sono una perpetua danza fisica, verbale ed emotiva (bisogna essere in due per ballare il tango!)<\/strong> O almeno, cos\u00ec dovrebbe essere. Quando c'\u00e8 uno squilibrio nello scambio, la relazione pu\u00f2 diventare malsana, dove Una parte soffre in silenzio e l'altra fa la dura.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Una donna, Katie Hanlon, mi ha aperto gli occhi. In un filmato su TikTok, mette in evidenza alcuni fattori probabilmente non ovvi che possono causare l'interruzione di una relazione. Si riferisce a ricerca<\/a> circa “normative male alexithymia”<\/em>, and explains it\u2019s a termine psicologico per <\/strong>“not being able to name or talk about your emotions.”<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

In short, men do have feelings but they’re unable to name them and verbally express them. As if they are emotionally illiterate, I would add. Katie is quite convinced that men\u2019s<\/strong> restrizioni nell'articolare le emozioni <\/strong>sono il motivo per cui a volte le relazioni galleggiano in un mare agitato.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n

\u201cMen feel the emotion and they just don\u2019t know how to talk about it, or how to garner empathy from each other about said emotion.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

Sottolinea inoltre che il problema non scomparir\u00e0 con il tempo e che le coppie non dovrebbero ignorare o sottovalutare il pericolo che si cela dietro di esso. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Also, men who are prone to holding in emotions tend to pass on this habit to their spouses too. That\u2019s why alcune donne scelgono di sopportare la tempesta <\/strong>and hide the emotional grief as they can\u2019t expect any understanding or dialogue with their partners.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n

\u201cAll the couple\u2019s humor in the world does not take away from the fact that you’re just not interested in us.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

This sounds like she believes men are actually not really interested in women and that\u2019s the reason why they rather make jokes instead of having serious talk about what bothers them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Vi sembra familiare? So che quando cerco di parlare con il mio maritino di come si sente, lui inizia a scherzare o cambia argomento. Non si sentir\u00e0 a suo agio nel parlare di emozioni<\/strong>n\u00e9 mi dice se lo ferisco (accidentalmente) con una scelta di parole sbagliata.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He won\u2019t communicate the emotion and I\u2019m unfortunately not a mind reader. That creates a una crepa che diventa sempre pi\u00f9 grande ogni volta che la tiene tutta per s\u00e9<\/strong>. Con il tempo diventiamo pi\u00f9 distanti e la nostra relazione ne risente.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What he won’t admit is this: distrugge la sua autostima maschile. <\/strong>We know well, that it\u2019s all rooted in the patriarchy and traditional masculinity. While at the same time:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n

\u201cI know for a fact there are wives all over the world who regularly cry themselves to sleep over their marriages\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

My husband thinks he needs to withhold his feelings and be tough, and it\u2019s forbidden to show any \u201cfemale-like\u201d traits such as sensitivity or crying, etc. Autocensurarsi o nascondere qualsiasi debolezza impedisce agli uomini di instaurare relazioni significative.<\/strong> e soffoca qualsiasi scambio emotivo all'interno.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Katie ritiene che se gli uomini non sono desiderosi di parlare dei loro bisogni emotivi, allora couples can\u2019t start resolving some other common issues<\/strong> such as unequal involvement in child care or housework, and mental workload (project manager of all family activities!) that\u2019s usually more of a woman\u2019s burden in marriage.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A public opinion on TikTok strongly agrees with Katie\u2019s assumptions, and one of the commenters, a woman, named Anu, shared her story: <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n

\u201cI left a 25 year marriage because of this. I cried on the regular and was always sick. It\u2019s been 6 years and I\u2019ve never been better.\u201d<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

Un utente chi \u00e8andrewblack<\/em> ha sottolineato il problema delle norme sociali che spingono gli uomini a comportarsi cos\u00ec:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n

“Not only are these things not taught\/modeled to men, but they are also actively repressed by our society. Each man is completely on his own in this struggle.” <\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

Another person, jpickle3, made a comment about how men usually don\u2019t start talking about emotions first, but they do react to woman\u2019s emotions:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n

“When they do talk about emotions it’s when you talk about yours first and they’re upset and express how bad that makes them feel about themselves.”<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

In the end, I will say that men really need to become friends with their emotions and understand their masculinity will not be compromised by showing vulnerability. You are humans, for God\u2019s sake!<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

That day I got furious because he had forgotten to stop by Target AGAIN, and get the ingredients for my cake. It was for our son\u2019s birthday and I planned to make a cake the day before. I shouted and called him names, and noticed his face was all shriveled but he didn\u2019t say anything….<\/p>","protected":false},"author":40,"featured_media":165124,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29814],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-165123","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-stories"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29814,"label":"Stories"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/06\/Woman-Exposes-Male-Condition-That-May-Sabotage-Marriage-And-No-Humor-Can-Fix-It-1024x576.jpg",1024,576,true],"author_info":{"display_name":"Tara Brown","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/author\/tara-brown\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29814,"name":"Stories","slug":"stories","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29814,"taxonomy":"category","description":"","parent":29651,"count":242,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29814,"category_count":242,"category_description":"","cat_name":"Stories","category_nicename":"stories","category_parent":29651}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/165123","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/40"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=165123"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/165123\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":165125,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/165123\/revisions\/165125"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/165124"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=165123"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=165123"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=165123"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}