{"id":165274,"date":"2024-06-05T09:08:48","date_gmt":"2024-06-05T09:08:48","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/herway.net\/?p=165274"},"modified":"2024-07-08T09:14:25","modified_gmt":"2024-07-08T09:14:25","slug":"le-aspettative-irrealistiche-rovinano-le-relazioni","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/le-aspettative-irrealistiche-rovinano-le-relazioni\/","title":{"rendered":"Questi miti relazionali sono il motivo per cui vi aspettate l'impossibile"},"content":{"rendered":"

Se avete guardato troppe commedie romantiche, le vostre aspettative in fatto di relazioni potrebbero essere surreale<\/em>. But I\u2019m just a romantic person<\/em> \u2013 you\u2019ll say in your defense. I\u2019m not saying you should stop enjoying your favorite movie genre, but be aware \u2013 La vita non \u00e8 fatta di cioccolatini e fiori.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Un paio di volte ero cos\u00ec disperato perch\u00e9 my boyfriend\u2019s personality or looks didn\u2019t match my desired qualities checklist.<\/strong> Some of them were too short, some were not interested in my tirades about astrology, others were not holding my hands the way I liked\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A dire la verit\u00e0 la mia lista era lunga, nessuno era cos\u00ec perfetto.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Credetemi, il Le aspettative elevate vi renderanno cos\u00ec frustrati da diventare tossici.<\/strong> Not that you\u2019ll want to, of course, it\u2019s just the way it goes. So make sure you don\u2019t forget you\u2019re dating a human, not a movie character. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

1. \u201cHe\u2019s a man so HE must make a first move\u201d<\/em><\/h2>\n\n\n\n
\"uomo<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

We\u2019re not living in the Middle Ages gurl! It doesn\u2019t matter who makes the first move as long you find things in common<\/strong> e continuare a chattare o a mandare messaggi. Pari diritti, ricordate? Avete il diritto di fare la prima mossa in quanto donne moderne e agguerrite!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A couple of times I made the first move and I\u2019m glad I did, otherwise I would miss out on some great guys.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

2. \u201cThat could never happen to me\u201d<\/em><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Mai dire mai, la vita \u00e8 piena di sorprese, e siate pronti ad affrontare diversi ostacoli sul vostro cammino. Se credete you\u2019d never let him see you crying even when you feel so broken inside, it can happen.<\/strong> That\u2019s normal, that\u2019s life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I said I could never be with someone who doesn\u2019t like dogs and guess what happened?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

3. \u201cI will make him jealous so he\u2019ll crave for me\u201d<\/em><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Oh, don\u2019t play the nasty games!<\/strong> He might be traumatized by pathological jealousy in the previous relationship so much that he\u2019ll avoid showing even the slightest clue of the jealousy. Besides, he might see through your intentions and that\u2019ll just push him away.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Credetemi, l'ho imparato a mie spese.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

4. \u201cChemistry must be very strong otherwise it\u2019s not a real thing\u201d<\/em><\/h2>\n\n\n\n
\"Uomo<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s just a good starting point, but your relationship can\u2019t be based simply on chemistry. If you don\u2019t share the same views and can\u2019t openly talk to each other<\/strong>, girl, you\u2019re not in a proper relationship. It might be just a hook-up.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I mistook chemistry for love several times and it didn\u2019t work out well. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

5. \u201cHe must take care of me\u201d<\/em><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Prendersi cura di te? You\u2019re not a pet, woman! <\/strong>You can take care and provide for yourself, this is the 21st century. You need a partner, someone to share your life with. Don\u2019t rely on his income!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I prefer to be independent and self-sufficient. That way, if we ever break up, at least I\u2019m safe from being financially broken.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

6. \u201cHe must be tall, handsome, and successful\u201d<\/em><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Oh, quindi cerchi Mr. Perfect? Sei sicura che la sua altezza, il suo aspetto e il suo successo possano renderti felice?<\/strong> Potrebbe avere un aspetto splendido e una carriera impressionante, ma allo stesso tempo essere un completo idiota all'interno.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019ve dated Mr. Perfect and believe me, under the surface he wasn\u2019t that perfect at all.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

7. \u201cIt\u2019s just one of his flaws, no one is perfect\u201d<\/em><\/h2>\n\n\n\n
\"uomo<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Fate attenzione se notate i segni della patologia nel suo comportamento. Questo vale anche per le dipendenze. I difetti sono una cosa, i problemi seri sono completamente diversi. <\/strong>So try not to be too \u201copen-minded\u201d and tolerant.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Una volta cercavo di giustificare il fatto che avesse bevuto troppo quella sera, ipotizzando che avesse avuto una brutta giornata al lavoro. Mi ci \u00e8 voluto un po' per capire che aveva un problema di alcolismo.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

8. \u201cI will change him\u201d<\/em><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

He\u2019s a grown man and no, you can\u2019t change him. You can talk about some of his actions and make him realize how they affect you, so he will or won\u2019t adjust them. If you can\u2019t live with his habits or awkward traits, move on<\/strong>, he\u2019s not for you. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ricordo quando pensavo di riuscire a far smettere il mio ragazzo di mangiare cibo spazzatura, oh ragazzi, ero ingenua. Aspettava che mi addormentassi e si preparava un panino succulento.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don\u2019t waste your time. You\u2019ll thank me later.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

9. \u201cI will not let him change me\u201d<\/em><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Of course not, and you shouldn\u2019t. Rimanete fedeli a chi eravate prima di conoscerlo. <\/strong>However, small adjustments are necessary, you\u2019ll expect the same from him.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I stopped partying every weekend because I wanted to spend time with my man. Surely, I didn\u2019t give up on time with my besties, it was just not as often as before. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

10. \u201cHalf a loaf is better than none\u201d<\/em><\/h2>\n\n\n\n
\"donna<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Don\u2019t settle for mediocre options just to avoid being single. Stare con qualcuno fino alla prossima occasione migliore non \u00e8 bello.<\/strong> (or mature). You can hurt someone who might be genuinely interested in you, and you won\u2019t feel good either.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Every time I tried to go on a date with someone I didn\u2019t really like, I would end up in anguish.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

11. \u201cIf this doesn\u2019t work, I\u2019ll find a new boyfriend\u201d<\/em><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

People are not shoes. So it\u2019s not like \u201cThese won\u2019t fit so I\u2019ll get myself a new ones.\u201d<\/em> C'\u00e8 un motivo per cui hai scelto di uscire con lui. He might have a unique personality or a very good sense of humor, he\u2019s nice to your friends<\/strong>, ecc.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I was delusional when I thought I\u2019d easily replace him with the next man behind the corner. Another man was just\u2026 very different.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

12. \u201cHe treats me badly but helps me with the money\u201d<\/em><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Questo significa che sei diventata un po' dipendente da lui e che chiuderai un occhio. Innanzitutto, cercate di vedere il quadro generale, Staccatevi da tutti i suoi favori e verificate se si sta comportando in modo malsano.<\/strong> <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Is he prone to abusive behavior? If your answer is yes, I have only one piece of advice: run girl, and don\u2019t look back.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

13. \u201cI hate rugby\u201d<\/em><\/h2>\n\n\n\n
\"uomo<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Avete il diritto di odiare il rugby, ma provate anche a immaginare come vi sentireste se lui sputasse: \u201cNatal chart is just a bunch of nonsense\u201d<\/em>. You would feel insulted, wouldn\u2019t you? So my dear, Assicuratevi di mostrare comprensione per il suo grande amore per il rugby. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

I watched the game with my SO a few times, and I kind of liked it. Try it, maybe you’ll change your mind too. At least, be supportive of his interests. You expect the same from him, right?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

14. \u201cThe past stays in the past\u201d<\/em><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Not necessarily. If you have some unresolved issues with your ex-boyfriend or still have feelings for him, that will influence your present relationship. You may look for substitution and it usually doesn’t work well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Cercate di lasciarvi alle spalle il passato e di concentrarvi sul presente con lui.<\/strong>. The man I\u2019m currently seeing is different from anyone I\u2019ve dated before, and I really enjoy getting to know him. I don\u2019t compare him to my exes. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don\u2019t allow shadows of the past to blur your view, use your \u201cpresent eyes\u201d to look at him.<\/strong> Trust me it\u2019s the best thing to do.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

15. \u201cI\u2019ll be a spoiled princess and he will do what I want\u201d<\/em><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Alcuni uomini lo faranno, forse. Altri scapperanno via da te. Chi vuole uscire con una bambina viziata? <\/strong>Lo faresti?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So be an adult and don\u2019t play childish games. Learn to communicate your needs and try to explain your views well. It always surprises me how a simple open talk can be so effective.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

16. \u201cThings will get better if we have a baby\u201d<\/em><\/h2>\n\n\n\n
\"uomo<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

No, no, no! Cercare di sistemare la vostra relazione rimanendo incinta di lui \u00e8 una pessima idea. <\/strong>Not to say it’s a bit selfish.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Quel bambino merita di nascere in una famiglia sana e non di essere uno strumento che vi aiuti a riparare i difetti della vostra relazione.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Essendo cresciuto in un ambiente caloroso e solidale, Consiglio sempre ai miei amici di fare molta attenzione a chi scelgono per creare una famiglia.<\/strong> Don\u2019t rush, wait for the right person!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

17. \u201cWe never argue, our relationship is perfect\u201d<\/em><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

La mancanza di disaccordo non \u00e8 normale e di solito nasconde problemi pi\u00f9 profondi che potrebbero non essere evidenti. Forse uno dei due ha semplicemente paura dei conflitti e tende ad evitarli<\/strong>. It doesn\u2019t mean you two are the perfect match, you\u2019re maybe just acting like everything is fine.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

My sister got married way too fast, after dating John for only two months. They were that kind of \u201cwe don\u2019t argue\u201d couple and it ended up with a very ugly divorce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I can’t imagine myself in a relationship without the occasional fights. I looove that makeup allure.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

18. \u201cMen and women can\u2019t be friends! There\u2019s always a hidden agenda\u201d<\/em><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Again I\u2019ll remind you we live in the 21st century and questa convinzione \u00e8 semplicemente superata, per non dire altro.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

I had male friends in school and college, and I have work buddies. If he thinks they secretly desire me, he just might be a toxic person. That\u2019s what Mark, my ex, used to think. See why he\u2019s my ex?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

19. \u201cHe needs to devote all his time to me\u201d<\/em><\/h2>\n\n\n\n
\"coppia<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Get real, you\u2019re not the Siamese twins. His zone of interest goes way beyond you. He has friends, hobbies, and a family. Se il mio ragazzo preferisce passare tutto il suo tempo libero con me, mi preoccuperei.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Le persone che non hanno amici o che hanno un cattivo rapporto con la famiglia non sono un buon materiale da frequentare.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

20. \u201cHe has to be there for me every time I need him\u201d<\/em><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Immagino che lo immaginiate come se fischiaste e lui corresse. Vuoi un uomo o un cane?<\/strong> Questo tipo di aspettativa \u00e8 un grande repellente per gli uomini.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Si pu\u00f2 amare veramente qualcuno che non ha dignit\u00e0 e rispetto di s\u00e9?<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019ll appreciate it if he’s there to wipe away my tears when my dog dies, but if he\u2019s busy, it\u2019s fine. I have friends too. It\u2019s the same the other way around \u2013 we can\u2019t be there for each other 24\/7, and that\u2019s fine.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Did you recognize yourself in any of these relationship myths? If you did, it\u2019s time to reconsider your views and ground yourself. Healthy relationships are based on respect, support, and open talk. If you want your relationship to succeed, no manipulative games, pretty please!<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

If you watched way too many rom-coms, your relationship expectations might be surreal. But I\u2019m just a romantic person \u2013 you\u2019ll say in your defense. I\u2019m not saying you should stop enjoying your favorite movie genre, but be aware \u2013 life is not chocolates and flowers. A couple of times I was so desperate because…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":25,"featured_media":165283,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29622],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-165274","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-relationship-advice"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29622,"label":"relationship advice"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/06\/These-Relationship-Myths-Are-The-Reason-Why-You-Expect-The-Impossible-1024x576.jpg",1024,576,true],"author_info":{"display_name":"Amy Nicholson","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/author\/amy\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29622,"name":"relationship advice","slug":"relationship-advice","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29622,"taxonomy":"category","description":"Making all aspects of your relationship work is one of the biggest challenges. Here, you can find advice for most of the issues you might encounter. ","parent":29620,"count":544,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29622,"category_count":544,"category_description":"Making all aspects of your relationship work is one of the biggest challenges. Here, you can find advice for most of the issues you might encounter. ","cat_name":"relationship advice","category_nicename":"relationship-advice","category_parent":29620}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/165274","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/25"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=165274"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/165274\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":165284,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/165274\/revisions\/165284"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/165283"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=165274"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=165274"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=165274"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}