Uno dei pi\u00f9 grandi malintesi quando si parla di persone con disabilit\u00e0 \u00e8 che non proviamo sentimenti o emozioni, o che non capiamo il vero significato dell'amore o che non vogliamo un'altra persona importante, quando in verit\u00e0 abbiamo gli stessi desideri di tutti gli altri.<\/p>\n
Da quando ho memoria, sono sempre stato il romantico senza speranza<\/a> fin dalla pi\u00f9 tenera et\u00e0. Fin dall'et\u00e0 di 14 anni, mi sono sempre immaginata di sposarmi nelle Smoky Mountains del Tennessee, in una piccola baita con tutti i miei amici e la mia famiglia, mentre camminavo lungo la navata verso mio marito nel mio deambulatore LiteGait viola.<\/p>\n When it comes to being single with a disability, it could be challenging because you have all these wants and desires when it comes to finding a partner. Some people in society see a disability such as Cerebral Palsy as a negative thing and not something unique. When I was single four years ago, I was talking to a young man who had an issue with me having Cerebral Palsy. He said, \u201cTylia, you are a beautiful girl, but you are in a wheelchair. It would be different if you were not in a wheelchair, but since you are, I would much rather be friends than anything else.\u201d<\/p>\n Per un po' questo mi ha infastidito, perch\u00e9 era tutto ci\u00f2 che cercavo e avevamo gli stessi interessi, ma la mia disabilit\u00e0 era un ostacolo per lui, quindi non avevo intenzione di perdere tempo con lui.<\/p>\n Quando si tratta del fatto che sono single, devi accettare la mia paralisi cerebrale. Se ci stiamo parlando e potenzialmente avremo una relazione, devi accettarmi per quello che sono e amarmi per quello che ho dentro e non per quello che ho fuori. La paralisi cerebrale \u00e8 ci\u00f2 che mi rende bella e non sparir\u00e0 mai, quindi potresti anche accettarla e, in caso contrario, \u00e8 stato bello conoscerti e ti ringrazio per l'esperienza. Essendo single con una disabilit\u00e0, penso che prima di pensare di andare alla ricerca dell'amore, dovresti gi\u00e0 essere innamorata di te stessa. Abbracciate il vostro corpo<\/a> for the beautiful person that you are as a woman and say, \u2018I am me and I love myself\u2019.<\/p>\n The most important thing when it comes to finding love with a disability is to be open and honest about it\u2014 do not hide it. For example, four years ago, before meeting my current boyfriend, I created dating profiles on OkCupid and MeetMe.<\/p>\n Metterei una foto di profilo di me stesso seduto su una sedia a rotelle dove si nota, perch\u00e9 sono orgoglioso della mia condizione e della vita che ho avuto a causa della mia situazione. Le esperienze di vita che posso condividere con le persone sono straordinarie.<\/p>\n Il motivo per cui dico di essere onesti riguardo alla vostra disabilit\u00e0 quando andate sui siti di incontri \u00e8 che volete mostrare al vostro potenziale partner che siete orgogliosi di ci\u00f2 che siete e della persona che siete diventati grazie alla vostra condizione.<\/p>\n The next thing I want to say about being a single woman with a condition such as Cerebral Palsy is that you should not just settle for anything that comes your way; take your time to enjoy single life as a woman with a disability and don’t rush into a relationship right away.<\/p>\n Take your time to explore the world for what it is. As a woman with a disability, I know it can be challenging to be single, especially when you see your friends in relationships and happy with their partners but you have to remember to be patient and to not settle for any man or woman who comes into your life because they may not be the right one or the one you are looking for after all. I have been in several situations where I started talking to a young man just because I hated the fact I was single, when I should not have\u2014I should have let time and destiny take their course. When it comes to finding your perfect match, time is key to everything that happens in life.<\/p>\n Also, when you are single, you should take the time to discover who you are as a person and what you need in a partner versus what you want\u2014for example, I am the type of girl who needs a partner who is ambitious, compassionate, and understanding, a world traveler who brings me inspiration and motivation and who has a great family support system.<\/p>\n What attracted me the most to my boyfriend, when we first started talking online four years ago, was the fact that he was full of motivation and he was ambitious. Despite our similar struggles, he was such a bright person, inside and out, and he was such a positive person, which is something that is very important when it comes to talking to a potential partner with a disability. If that person is not confident and doesn’t have the same views as you do then maybe it is best that you stop talking to them or stop pursuing a relationship with them because eventually they will drag you down with them. You may start to have the same mindset as them and you will never grow together. The way I look at it is if you are talking to somebody and you are single, and you are getting to know them, if you do not see them as being a potential partner who can help you grow in life then you should put them in the friendzone. When it comes to being single with a disability and looking for a partner, you have to set boundaries on what you want, and you have to make it clear to your potential partner that you will not accept certain behaviors and habits and you need to have boundaries. I feel like when it comes to being single and you begin to put yourself out there, it is essential that you set limits for yourself because then that gives you an idea of what you are looking for as the strong independent woman that you are. Even with a disability, whether it be Cerebral Palsy, autism spina bifida, or muscular dystrophy, you have to set boundaries and you have to be clear on what you want, or else you will be confused in the long run.<\/p>\n Stabilire dei limiti per se stessi pu\u00f2 permettere di vedere ci\u00f2 che si vuole in un partner rispetto a ci\u00f2 che non si desidera vedere in un'altra persona importante. La prima cosa che faccio di solito quando inizio a parlare con un giovane \u00e8 fare un elenco di pro e contro. Si pu\u00f2 fare una cernita le buone qualit\u00e0 della persona<\/a> che potenzialmente si sta per avere una relazione accanto alle cose negative e se ci sono troppe cose negative, allora si pu\u00f2 mettere in zona amicizia.<\/p>\n