{"id":16838,"date":"2020-08-23T09:48:19","date_gmt":"2020-08-23T09:48:19","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/herway.net\/?p=16838"},"modified":"2021-08-11T10:33:21","modified_gmt":"2021-08-11T10:33:21","slug":"ho-finalmente-accettato-che-non-eri-nientaltro-che-una-dura-lezione","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/ho-finalmente-accettato-che-non-eri-nientaltro-che-una-dura-lezione\/","title":{"rendered":"Ho finalmente accettato il fatto che non eri altro che una dura lezione"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Le lezioni pi\u00f9 difficili della vita iniziano in modo pacifico, senza alcun segno di pericolo. Per questo non ti ho mai riconosciuto come una persona tossica.<\/p>\n<p>Eri la cosa pi\u00f9 vicina alla perfezione quando ci siamo conosciuti. Hai spostato montagne e camminato sull'acqua solo per rendermi felice.<\/p>\n<p>Sembrava che foste troppo belli per essere veri e, a quanto pare, lo eravate.<\/p>\n<p><strong>That perfect beginning was just a tool you used to keep me under your command. You were nothing more than an emotional manipulator that I couldn\u2019t recognize until it was too late.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I guess that\u2019s why <a href=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/life\/10-tipi-di-manipolazione-emotiva\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">manipolazione emotiva<\/a> is so powerful and destructive, as you don\u2019t know you are a victim.<\/p>\n<p>You think of it as something normal because you can\u2019t believe that someone would be capable of using your love against you.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Ora che mi guardo indietro, posso vedere chiaramente lo schema.<\/strong> Ti sei aggrappato a ogni parola che ho detto.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-112399\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/young-sad-woman-sitting-on-the-floor.jpg\" alt=\"giovane donna triste seduta sul pavimento\" width=\"1600\" height=\"1068\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/young-sad-woman-sitting-on-the-floor.jpg 1600w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/young-sad-woman-sitting-on-the-floor-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/young-sad-woman-sitting-on-the-floor-1024x684.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/young-sad-woman-sitting-on-the-floor-768x513.jpg 768w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/young-sad-woman-sitting-on-the-floor-1536x1025.jpg 1536w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/young-sad-woman-sitting-on-the-floor-150x100.jpg 150w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/young-sad-woman-sitting-on-the-floor-720x481.jpg 720w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/young-sad-woman-sitting-on-the-floor-1280x854.jpg 1280w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1600px) 100vw, 1600px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Tu ascoltavi attentamente e io mi sentivo cos\u00ec fortunata ad avere qualcuno che si preoccupava cos\u00ec tanto da interessarsi a ogni aspetto della mia vita. Non avevo idea che le parole fossero la tua arma preferita.<\/p>\n<p>Sapevi come distorcere ogni mia parola in modo che ti andasse bene.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Lei avrebbe usato delle parole per provocare in me quel senso di colpa.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Every time I wanted some time for myself, when I wanted to hang out with my friends or go somewhere without you, you wouldn\u2019t say a word or you would act like that was OK with you and every time I had to pay my dues when I would come home because all I got from you was ignorance and the silent treatment.<\/p>\n<p>Qualche settimana dopo, quando litigavamo, mi sbattevi in faccia tutto questo, dicendomi che eri sempre l'ultima e che tutti gli altri erano pi\u00f9 importanti di me.<\/p>\n<p><strong>A poco a poco ho preso le distanze dai miei amici senza nemmeno rendermene conto.<\/strong> Volevi tutta la mia attenzione.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-112401\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/sad-couple-sitting-on-bed.jpg\" alt=\"coppia triste seduta sul letto\" width=\"1600\" height=\"1068\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/sad-couple-sitting-on-bed.jpg 1600w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/sad-couple-sitting-on-bed-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/sad-couple-sitting-on-bed-1024x684.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/sad-couple-sitting-on-bed-768x513.jpg 768w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/sad-couple-sitting-on-bed-1536x1025.jpg 1536w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/sad-couple-sitting-on-bed-150x100.jpg 150w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/sad-couple-sitting-on-bed-720x481.jpg 720w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/sad-couple-sitting-on-bed-1280x854.jpg 1280w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1600px) 100vw, 1600px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>You couldn\u2019t stand that I could have fun without you. However, when it came to you, the rules were different.<\/p>\n<p>Si poteva uscire quando si voleva, dove si voleva.<\/p>\n<p>Tornavi a casa tardi con l'odore dell'alcol e anche se avessi voluto dire qualcosa sarebbe stato inutile perch\u00e9 mi avresti zittito immediatamente.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Sapeva esattamente cosa dire e quando dirlo per farmi sentire come se fossi io il colpevole.<\/strong> Non solo una volta, ma in ogni situazione in cui ci siamo trovati.<\/p>\n<p>Sei stato cos\u00ec bravo a <a href=\"https:\/\/www.lifehack.org\/287448\/14-signs-someone-always-playing-the-victim\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">fare la vittima<\/a> che anche quando facevi qualcosa di imperdonabile finivo per dispiacermi per te.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Mi sono sentita in gabbia. Mi hai intrappolato con le tue manipolazioni.<\/strong> I felt like I couldn\u2019t go anywhere or do anything right without upsetting you.<\/p>\n<p>You always made me feel like I wasn\u2019t enough. Like I was beneath you. You preyed on my insecurities.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-112402\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/unhappy-woman-lying-in-bed-next-to-her-boyfriend.jpg\" alt=\"donna infelice sdraiata a letto accanto al fidanzato\" width=\"1600\" height=\"1068\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/unhappy-woman-lying-in-bed-next-to-her-boyfriend.jpg 1600w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/unhappy-woman-lying-in-bed-next-to-her-boyfriend-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/unhappy-woman-lying-in-bed-next-to-her-boyfriend-1024x684.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/unhappy-woman-lying-in-bed-next-to-her-boyfriend-768x513.jpg 768w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/unhappy-woman-lying-in-bed-next-to-her-boyfriend-1536x1025.jpg 1536w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/unhappy-woman-lying-in-bed-next-to-her-boyfriend-150x100.jpg 150w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/unhappy-woman-lying-in-bed-next-to-her-boyfriend-720x481.jpg 720w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/unhappy-woman-lying-in-bed-next-to-her-boyfriend-1280x854.jpg 1280w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1600px) 100vw, 1600px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>You wrapped insults into jokes. You would always share your \u2018wisdom\u2019 with me and give me advice on everything concerning my life.<\/p>\n<p>You always acted like you knew better and everything you said or did was \u2018for my own good\u2019.<\/p>\n<p>Mi abbattevi, mi facevi sentire inutile e poi tornavi alla tua modalit\u00e0 dolce, amorevole e protettiva, solo per farmi sentire fortunata di averti nella mia vita.<\/p>\n<p><strong>But you weren\u2019t a blessing, you were more like a curse. <\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>Quella da cui non ho visto scampo finch\u00e9 non sei uscito dalla mia vita per passare alla tua prossima vittima.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Queste sono state le tue parole, che sono state anche colpa mia per motivi che non sono stati spiegati.<\/p>\n<p><strong>I can\u2019t say I was relieved when you were no longer a part of my life.<\/strong> Ero distrutta e devastata. Pensavo di aver perso l'amore della mia vita.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-112405\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/depressed-woman-sitting-on-the-floor.jpg\" alt=\"donna depressa seduta sul pavimento\" width=\"1600\" height=\"1068\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/depressed-woman-sitting-on-the-floor.jpg 1600w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/depressed-woman-sitting-on-the-floor-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/depressed-woman-sitting-on-the-floor-1024x684.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/depressed-woman-sitting-on-the-floor-768x513.jpg 768w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/depressed-woman-sitting-on-the-floor-1536x1025.jpg 1536w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/depressed-woman-sitting-on-the-floor-150x100.jpg 150w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/depressed-woman-sitting-on-the-floor-720x481.jpg 720w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/depressed-woman-sitting-on-the-floor-1280x854.jpg 1280w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1600px) 100vw, 1600px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>I missed you. For the first month or so I couldn\u2019t stop my tears from falling.<\/p>\n<p>Le lacrime si sono gradualmente fermate; non so esattamente in quale momento, ma c'\u00e8 stato un momento in cui le lacrime hanno cancellato la mia vista e ho potuto vederti chiaramente.<\/p>\n<p>Ho capito che razza di stronzo manipolatore eri in realt\u00e0.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Per la prima volta dopo tanto tempo mi sono sentita libera, mi sono sentita cos\u00ec bene. Mi sembrava di poter respirare di nuovo.<\/strong> It was easy to do that when you weren\u2019t messing with my mind anymore.<\/p>\n<p>Mi ha fatto sentire cos\u00ec bene e mi ha dato la forza extra di cui avevo bisogno per riconquistare tutto ci\u00f2 che tu avevi preso per me.<\/p>\n<p><em>Mi ci \u00e8 voluto molto tempo per scoprire che <a href=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/life\/7-best-ways-improve-confidence-find-self-love\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">fiducia e amore per se stessi<\/a> che mi hai tolto. Ho finalmente capito che sono abbastanza e che non dovrei mai permettere a nessuno di trattarmi come se fossi meno. <\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>My mind and my soul are now at peace because I am happy with who I am. I won\u2019t allow anyone to cage me again.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-112406\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/calm-woman-relaxing-outdoor.jpg\" alt=\"donna calma e rilassante all&#039;aperto\" width=\"1600\" height=\"1068\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/calm-woman-relaxing-outdoor.jpg 1600w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/calm-woman-relaxing-outdoor-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/calm-woman-relaxing-outdoor-1024x684.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/calm-woman-relaxing-outdoor-768x513.jpg 768w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/calm-woman-relaxing-outdoor-1536x1025.jpg 1536w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/calm-woman-relaxing-outdoor-150x100.jpg 150w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/calm-woman-relaxing-outdoor-720x481.jpg 720w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/calm-woman-relaxing-outdoor-1280x854.jpg 1280w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1600px) 100vw, 1600px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Sembra ridicolo dirlo ora, ma allora pensavo che non ti avrei mai dimenticato. Pensavo che il danno che avevi causato fosse permanente e che il dolore che provavo fosse incurabile.<\/p>\n<p>Quello che non ho capito \u00e8 che, anche se le cicatrici erano ancora l\u00ec, ero molto pi\u00f9 forte di quanto credessi.<\/p>\n<p>I was so mad at you for a long, long time. I couldn\u2019t process that someone who had my heart could hurt me so badly.<\/p>\n<p>Ma non sono pi\u00f9 arrabbiata. Ho finalmente accettato che era inevitabile. Ti ho perdonato.<\/p>\n<p>Mi sono perdonato per essere rimasto cos\u00ec a lungo e dopo tutto questo tempo non penso quasi mai a te. <strong>Non hai pi\u00f9 alcun potere su di me o sulla mia vita.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I\u2019ve finally accepted that things had to go that way so I could learn how to be truly happy. So I could learn what love should never look like.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Non eri l'amore della mia vita, eri la lezione pi\u00f9 difficile della mia vita. Quella che non avevo altra scelta che imparare.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-112397\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/Ive-Finally-Accepted-That-You-Were-Nothing-More-Than-A-Tough-Lesson-pinterest.jpg\" alt=\"Ho finalmente accettato il fatto che non eri altro che una dura lezione\" width=\"1000\" height=\"1500\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/Ive-Finally-Accepted-That-You-Were-Nothing-More-Than-A-Tough-Lesson-pinterest.jpg 1000w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/Ive-Finally-Accepted-That-You-Were-Nothing-More-Than-A-Tough-Lesson-pinterest-200x300.jpg 200w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/Ive-Finally-Accepted-That-You-Were-Nothing-More-Than-A-Tough-Lesson-pinterest-683x1024.jpg 683w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/Ive-Finally-Accepted-That-You-Were-Nothing-More-Than-A-Tough-Lesson-pinterest-768x1152.jpg 768w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/Ive-Finally-Accepted-That-You-Were-Nothing-More-Than-A-Tough-Lesson-pinterest-150x225.jpg 150w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The hardest lessons in life begin peacefully, without any sign of danger. That\u2019s why I never recognized you as someone toxic. You were the closest thing to perfection when we first met. You moved mountains and walked on water just to make me happy. It felt like you were too good to be true and&#8230;<\/p>","protected":false},"author":40,"featured_media":112409,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29619],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-16838","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-stories-love"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29619,"label":"stories"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/Ive-Finally-Accepted-That-You-Were-Nothing-More-Than-A-Tough-Lesson-1024x684.jpg",1024,684,true],"author_info":{"display_name":"Tara Brown","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/author\/tara-brown\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29619,"name":"stories","slug":"stories-love","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29619,"taxonomy":"category","description":"To all the souls struggling with complicated love experiences: These heartfelt stories about love, heartbreak, and moving on will be your voice of wisdom.","parent":38,"count":424,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29619,"category_count":424,"category_description":"To all the souls struggling with complicated love experiences: These heartfelt stories about love, heartbreak, and moving on will be your voice of wisdom.","cat_name":"stories","category_nicename":"stories-love","category_parent":38}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16838","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/40"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=16838"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16838\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/112409"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=16838"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=16838"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=16838"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}