{"id":18982,"date":"2018-05-21T12:23:03","date_gmt":"2018-05-21T12:23:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/herway.net\/?p=18982"},"modified":"2021-08-12T08:26:56","modified_gmt":"2021-08-12T08:26:56","slug":"e-vuoto-allinterno-per-questo-non-e-in-grado-di-amare","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/e-vuoto-allinterno-per-questo-non-e-in-grado-di-amare\/","title":{"rendered":"\u00c8 vuoto dentro, ecco perch\u00e9 non \u00e8 in grado di amare"},"content":{"rendered":"

L'apparenza pu\u00f2 ingannare<\/span>\u2014<\/span>he taught me that, all too well. I never imagined who he really was underneath that perfect exterior he so skillfully created. I could never have guessed that he couldn’t love me because he had nothing left to give, he was completely empty on the inside.<\/span><\/p>\n

I couldn’t resist him. There was something that drew me to him, something that just seemed familiar. It made me feel safe. His behavior, his sweet talk, and his smooth ways made my walls tumble down. I trusted him. I fell in love with him in a split second, without fear or doubt, without thinking too much. I just followed my feelings, completely unaware of what lay ahead. <\/span><\/p>\n

Non avrei mai immaginato che qualcuno potesse essere cos\u00ec freddo e calcolatore. Ma ora so che non aveva intenzione di restare. Aveva pianificato tutto, ne sono certa. Ho la sensazione che l'avesse gi\u00e0 fatto un milione di volte, quindi conosceva bene il suo piano di gioco. Si stava proteggendo dall'amore e nel frattempo mi avrebbe ferita. <\/span><\/p>\n

Sapeva cosa dire e quando dirlo.<\/b> Sapeva come darmi quel tanto che bastava. Quel tanto che basta di se stesso e delle sue emozioni che io avrei trattenuto e desiderato di pi\u00f9 e mai abbastanza per sentirlo completamente mio. <\/span><\/p>\n

Sapeva essere cos\u00ec vicino e cos\u00ec distante allo stesso tempo. <\/b>He made a plan and he executed it. He lured me in by making our beginning so incredibly beautiful. And when he saw that my feelings were growing, that I was already attached, that\u2019s when the other part of the plan started. <\/span><\/p>\n

Tutto \u00e8 cambiato gradualmente. <\/b>He started changing the little things in our relationship. For example, texts became less frequent. He would text me, I would text back and then I wouldn\u2019t hear from him for hours. He had a lot of similar texting games, and as easy as it had been to talk to and text with him in the beginning, now it had become frustrating and difficult. <\/span><\/p>\n

Non aveva quasi mai tempo per me. Tutto era pi\u00f9 importante e io venivo sempre per ultima. Quando finalmente trovava il tempo per me, mi teneva cos\u00ec vicina e si mostrava cos\u00ec affettuoso che mi innamoravo ancora di pi\u00f9 di lui. Era quasi come se stesse facendo ammenda per tutto il tempo di cui mi aveva privato. <\/span><\/p>\n

E non appena usciva dalla porta, tutto ricominciava da capo. Sarebbe diventato di nuovo distante. <\/b>Poi mi serviva briciole della sua attenzione e del suo affetto solo per avere qualcosa a cui aggrapparmi. Mi attirava a s\u00e9 quando vedeva che le cose stavano diventando troppo difficili da gestire, poi esagerava quando mi allontanavo. Lo fece pi\u00f9 e pi\u00f9 volte, finch\u00e9 non se ne and\u00f2 senza nemmeno salutarmi. <\/span><\/p>\n

That lack of goodbye hurt more than anything because I couldn’t see all that was flawed in our relationship. <\/b>Tutti i problemi che avevamo non sembravano mai irrisolvibili. Ho continuato ad aspettare, dandogli tutto il tempo, lo spazio e la comprensione che voleva. La sua partenza \u00e8 stata del tutto inaspettata. Ho dato la colpa a me stessa. <\/span><\/p>\n

I couldn’t see how much damage he had left because I kept sugar-coating everything.<\/b> Continuavo ad aggrapparmi a questa immagine perfetta di lui che non aveva alcun legame con la realt\u00e0. Continuavo ad aspettare che tornasse. Ma non lo fece mai. Deve essere passato alla sua prossima conquista. Far\u00e0 quello che fa sempre<\/span>\u2014<\/span>far\u00e0 innamorare qualcuno di lui senza avere l'intenzione di ricambiarlo. <\/span><\/p>\n

Only after he was no longer a part of my life, after I\u2019d had a chance to think and unwillingly overanalyze every aspect of our relationship, did everything start to make sense. <\/span>Mi ha parlato di lei, della sua ex, di colei che lo ha distrutto.<\/b> Era cos\u00ec distrutto che non \u00e8 mai riuscito ad aggiustare se stesso. Lo ha solo lasciato insensibile e vuoto.  <\/span><\/p>\n

That\u2019s why he put those titanium walls up, got his game on and put an indestructible shield in front of him to protect him from potential hurt. It saved him the hurt but it never allowed him to be happy or to love again either.  <\/span><\/p>\n

Per lui era pi\u00f9 facile ferirmi e passare alla ragazza successiva che aprirsi davvero con me e lasciarmi entrare. <\/b>He felt safe and in control knowing that I cared more and that I couldn\u2019t hurt him. I guess he decided it was time to go when he started caring more for me too. I am not saying this to justify what he did to me. I was also broken and I didn\u2019t go around destroying other people. <\/span><\/p>\n

Alla fine, mi dispiace solo per lui. \u00c8 diventato cos\u00ec bravo a schivare il dolore che ha schivato anche l'amore.<\/b> Deve essere triste essere lui. Sa che qualcosa finir\u00e0 prima ancora di cominciare. Pianifica una via di fuga ogni volta che inizia una relazione. Sta scappando dai suoi sentimenti per nascondere il fatto che \u00e8 ancora cos\u00ec incredibilmente distrutto.  <\/span><\/p>\n

He never healed and now he is walking around with this numbness and emptiness inside of him that doesn\u2019t allow him to truly feel anything again. He doesn\u2019t allow anybody in because the stakes are too high, the pain is too great. <\/span>But there is still one thing I don’t get<\/i><\/b>\u2014<\/i><\/b>\u201cHow could he hurt me, knowing exactly how it would make me feel?\u201d <\/i><\/b><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Looks can be deceiving\u2014he taught me that, all too well. I never imagined who he really was underneath that perfect exterior he so skillfully created. I could never have guessed that he couldn’t love me because he had nothing left to give, he was completely empty on the inside. I couldn’t resist him. There was…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":42,"featured_media":18983,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29646],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-18982","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-understanding-men"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29646,"label":"understanding men"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/black-and-white-emotion-looking-59196.jpg",800,558,false],"author_info":{"display_name":"Selma June","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/author\/selmajune\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29646,"name":"understanding men","slug":"understanding-men","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29646,"taxonomy":"category","description":"Wondering about what's going on inside his head? Or do you need explanations for his actions? Learn to understand men, and your life will become easier.","parent":29643,"count":570,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29646,"category_count":570,"category_description":"Wondering about what's going on inside his head? Or do you need explanations for his actions? Learn to understand men, and your life will become easier.","cat_name":"understanding men","category_nicename":"understanding-men","category_parent":29643}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18982","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/42"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=18982"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18982\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/18983"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=18982"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=18982"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=18982"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}