{"id":51215,"date":"2020-10-14T13:19:35","date_gmt":"2020-10-14T13:19:35","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/herway.net\/?p=51215"},"modified":"2021-08-11T11:18:14","modified_gmt":"2021-08-11T11:18:14","slug":"il-mio-ragazzo-mi-ha-lasciata-cosa-devo-fare","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/il-mio-ragazzo-mi-ha-lasciata-cosa-devo-fare\/","title":{"rendered":"Il mio ragazzo mi ha lasciato: Cosa fare dopo?"},"content":{"rendered":"

“My <\/i> il fidanzato si \u00e8 lasciato <\/i> with me. What do I do, say, and how do I deal with this?” <\/i><\/p>\n

Se il tuo ragazzo ti ha appena lasciata, voglio che tu sappia che capisco la complessit\u00e0 delle emozioni che provi in questo momento.<\/p>\n

I understand your pain and this uncontrollable urge to tell him everything what’s on your mind.<\/p>\n

Capisco il vostro desiderio di urlare, gridare e piangere fino a quando non vi faranno male gli occhi.<\/p>\n

I understand how you feel because I’ve been there, and that’s why I’m sending you my virtual hug (I know when I was feeling this way, even a virtual hug would mean the world to me).<\/p>\n

All you’re able to do is rewind all those happy and less happier moments you had together\u2014your first kiss, first touch, first lovemaking, your first fight, and especially, all the things that happened at the end of the relationship . <\/p>\n

Quando si attraversa una rottura (soprattutto dopo una relazione a lungo termine <\/a> ), all you’re able to do is press the rewind button and start searching for all potential red flags (that you somehow missed while in the relationship) and let this feeling of confusion flood every pore.<\/p>\n

And how wouldn’t you? After all, at one point, he meant the world to you, and now, all of a sudden, this world has become just a distant memory. <\/i><\/b><\/p>\n

\"laYou still love him and hate him at the same time, and you can’t decide which of the two feelings you should give permission to prevail.<\/p>\n

Un momento si ha la sensazione che la situazione sia assolutamente senza speranza e che il mondo sia appena finito davanti ai propri occhi, e un altro momento si ha la sensazione che ci sia ancora qualcosa nell'aria, qualcosa di non detto, qualcosa di vero che deve essere riportato in vita.<\/p>\n

You feel like there is still a way to make things work, and being intoxicated by this feeling, you subconsciously decide that you will try to fix things by reaching out to him to tell him that he’s making a big mistake and that you’re meant to be together. <\/p>\n

Ma poi, quando si pensa a tutti i possibili scenari e risultati una volta detto questo, ci si blocca immediatamente e si rinuncia al solo pensiero di farlo. <\/p>\n

Mandargli un messaggio \u00e8 fuori discussione. Seguirlo sui social media non far\u00e0 altro che prolungare il vostro strazio. Raggiungere i suoi amici intimi o i vostri amici comuni vi far\u00e0 apparire infelici.<\/p>\n

Ci si rende conto di non avere scelta, di non avere alternative e di non avere idea di come affrontare tutto questo.<\/p>\n

And that’s how you got here. By typing ” Il mio <\/i> il fidanzato si \u00e8 lasciato <\/i> con me <\/i> ” in Google, you subconsciously decided to look for help, which is the first step in dealing with this situation like a boss! <\/p>\n

And I want you to know how glad I am that you did it (because as I’m writing this, my determination and sheer will to help you and make your heartbreak as painless as possible is really strong within me).<\/p>\n

Quindi, cosa fare dopo?<\/h2>\n

\"zenLa prima cosa da fare \u00e8 accettare il fatto che ti abbia lasciato, invece di vederlo come qualcosa di assolutamente distruttivo.<\/p>\n

So che pu\u00f2 sembrarvi strano, ma prima lo accetterete, prima inizierete a vedere le cose con maggiore chiarezza.<\/p>\n

E capire le cose significa innanzitutto saperle affrontare.<\/p>\n

Lasciate passare abbastanza tempo per pacificare le vostre emozioni e aiutarvi ad accettare la situazione (almeno con una met\u00e0 del vostro cuore spezzato).<\/p>\n

Dopodich\u00e9, si pu\u00f2 pensare a due possibili soluzioni: andare avanti per sempre o riprenderlo. <\/b><\/p>\n

I gave you these two possible solutions for a reason because not everyone’s breakup situation is the same.<\/p>\n

Some breakups happen because two people simply weren’t meant to be together. Some breakups happen to teach you a valuable lesson, so you can make things right again. But, one thing is sure.<\/p>\n

His decision to break up with you didn’t happen overnight!<\/h2>\n

\"laI would be mean and unreasonable if I said that he’s the only one to blame. In every relationship, both partners have equal responsibility for the breakup, regardless who proposed going separate ways first. <\/p>\n

There are some things that you’ve said and done when you shouldn’t have, and there are some things that he’s said and done when he shouldn’t have. (And that’s perfectly okay, unless it’s about cheating).<\/p>\n

Queste cose sono grandi o piccole, o del tutto irrilevanti al momento.<\/p>\n

But in the end, it’s those things that have influenced further growth or stagnation of your relationship. It’s all those little and big things that have led you to this crepacuore <\/a> .<\/p>\n

So, his decision to break up with you didn’t happen overnight, but it was there, hovering over your heads for a long time now, and you had a hard time acknowledging it and accepting it.<\/p>\n

You didn’t pay much attention to all those red flags that were right in front of your nose, to all those situations that were destroying your relationship bit by bit.<\/p>\n

You wanted to believe that it will pass, or you decided to continue living with it, believing that it’s not a <\/i><\/b>grande affare<\/i><\/b>. E poi, quando \u00e8 successo, siete rimasti scioccati. <\/i><\/b><\/p>\n

Even though you knew that it would eventually happen, you were still shocked because you simply didn’t expect it. (And who would?)<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"unaEven if he had told you in advance that he might break up with you someday for some reason, you wouldn’t have believed it, and you would definitely not have come prepared for it.<\/p>\n

When the person you’re still in love with tells you that it’s over, there’s nothing you can do but lock yourself in your imaginary safe haven and observe from there, from a safe distance from the real world.<\/p>\n

But, that’s exactly what you shouldn’t do! It’s time you deal with things like the big girl that you are, and I will make sure to help you with everything you need! <\/b><\/p>\n

So, the first part or the first thing we’ll do is go through some possible and most common reasons for why he broke up with you so that you have a clear insight of everything.<\/p>\n

It’s important that you first understand why he broke up with you , and then we will move to the second part where we will go through things that will help you move on or get him back if he’s the right one for you! <\/p>\n

With mutual effort, we will make the best of the situation, and all I want from you is to take a deep breath and promise me that you’ll read everything till the end. Okay?<\/p>\n

Okay, let’s get started!<\/p>\n

PARTE PRIMA: 9 POSSIBILI MOTIVI PER CUI TI HA LASCIATO<\/h2>\n

\"laWhen we’re going through a heartbreak , it’s hard to focus on all the possible reasons for why our partner broke up with us in the first place .<\/p>\n

All those draining emotions that you’re going through are blocking your clear thinking and observing the situation you’re in.<\/p>\n

And for that reason, here’s the list of possible and most common reasons for why he broke up with you which will help you understand things better and help you focus on the root of your problem so that you can heal sooner and act accordingly:<\/p>\n

His “feelings” have changed<\/h2>\n

\"unIf someone had given me a dime for every time I\u2019ve heard that famous sentence: “It’s not you, it\u2019s me”<\/b> sarei gi\u00e0 pi\u00f9 ricco di Oprah.<\/p>\n

Joking aside, but this is exactly what’s going on in the majority of cases when a partner’s feelings all of a sudden change.<\/p>\n

La domanda principale \u00e8 perch\u00e9 i sentimenti cambiano nel corso di un <\/b>periodo di tempo<\/b>? Cosa fa perdere loro la scintilla e la forza iniziale fin dall'inizio della relazione?<\/b><\/p>\n

Il motivo numero uno per cui questo accade \u00e8 cadere in una routine, sentirsi troppo a proprio agio l'uno con l'altro, il che fa s\u00ec che entrambi smettiate di sforzarvi come facevate prima.<\/p>\n

Ricordate quando vi siete incontrati per la prima volta e passavate un sacco di tempo davanti allo specchio cercando di trovare la combinazione perfetta per impressionarlo? <\/p>\n

E probabilmente lui stava facendo lo stesso a casa sua prima di incontrarti. Eravate cos\u00ec ansiosi di fare colpo l'uno sull'altra e volevate che tutto fosse il pi\u00f9 perfetto possibile.<\/p>\n

E poi, dopo un po' di tempo in una relazione, si raggiunge un punto di totale casualit\u00e0 e si smette semplicemente di cercare di impressionare l'altro.<\/p>\n

When you reach that point, your feelings start changing because you feel that you’re no longer with the same person. You feel as if you’re with someone whom you’ve known for your entire life.<\/p>\n

Ci si annoia a ripetere sempre le stesse cose, come guardare lo stesso programma televisivo o mangiare nello stesso ristorante. Ci si blocca in una routine senza nemmeno rendersene conto. <\/p>\n

So, if he told you that famous sentence: \u201cIt’s not you, it’s me\u201d, then you know this is exactly what’s going on.<\/p>\n

L'unica domanda \u00e8 se siete ancora disposti a riportare la vecchia scintilla nella vostra relazione e a riprovarci.<\/p>\n

You aren’t compatible (anymore)<\/h2>\n

\"unEssendo esseri umani che vogliono tutto e lo vogliono subito (come detto da Regina <\/i> in una loro canzone), quando ci piace qualcuno, il nostro affetto per lui pu\u00f2 arrivare al punto di affrettare le cose e buttarsi troppo velocemente in una relazione. <\/p>\n

Quando idolatriamo qualcuno, lo vediamo come un essere umano perfetto.<\/p>\n

We instantly forget about all past relationships , and all we want is to jump into a new one and be with the person we’re so crazy about.<\/p>\n

Just because we like them so much, we’re convinced that we’re compatible and that they’re the one for us. Or we jump into a relationship for all the wrong reasons. <\/p>\n

Forse la sua ex fidanzata lo ha lasciato un paio di mesi fa e quella con te era solo una relazione di ripiego.<\/p>\n

Deep down in his heart, he knew that the end will come, but he didn’t know exactly when. <\/p>\n

Quando si entra in una relazione troppo velocemente o per il motivo sbagliato, la sua fine \u00e8 semplicemente inevitabile.<\/p>\n

But, this doesn’t mean that the relationship is totally doomed. If there is love and if there is still effort, things can still change. <\/p>\n

Ricorda:<\/b> Where there is a will, there is a way! (I recently bought a hoodie with that inscription, and I swear to God, I’ll keep wearing it till the rest of my life to keep reminding myself that anything is possible if you’re determined and if you want it with your heart and not only your mind.)<\/p>\n

Vedi anche: Essere innamorati del proprio partner non vi rende compatibili <\/a><\/p>\n

Eventi stressanti al di fuori della relazione<\/h2>\n

\"unEvery single problem in a relationship belongs either to a category called \u2018internal conflicts\u2019 or one named \u2018external conflicts\u2019.<\/p>\n

I conflitti interni riguardano le cose che accadono nella relazione, quelle per cui si litiga di pi\u00f9 e quelle che distruggono sottilmente l'equilibrio di una relazione.<\/p>\n

Ma se ci fossero dei conflitti interni, ne sareste sicuramente consapevoli.<\/p>\n

External conflicts are stressful events outside the relationship, and many people forget or they’re not familiar with the fact that these stressful events can greatly impact your relationship as well. <\/b><\/p>\n

For example, if your ex has always been working too much without ever asking for a couple of days off (even when he’s feeling sick), if he’s just found a new job that he doesn’t really like that much, if his previous relationship is constantly haunting him (read: if his ex girlfriend is onto him), if he has problems in his family, with his pet, with his friends and similar, he will bring all that negativity and stress into your relationship as well.<\/p>\n

Di conseguenza, non sar\u00e0 interessato a trascorrere una notte romantica con voi o a fare qualcosa con voi.<\/p>\n

Si nota la mancanza di contatto, di baci e di tutte le cose che si facevano prima.<\/p>\n

He no longer showers you with affection because he’s too occupied with other things going on his life and in his head.<\/p>\n

And as a result, you start feeling like you’re not good enough, like he’s not giving you enough attention and avoiding you on purpose.<\/p>\n

La vostra relazione diventa priva di vita e di anima, ed \u00e8 allora che lui decide di lasciarvi e di dirvi che le cose tra voi due non funzionano pi\u00f9.<\/p>\n

(Inoltre, questa situazione potrebbe essere anche viceversa).<\/p>\n

Un accumulo di parole non dette e di disaccordi <\/h2>\n

\"l'uomoIf you’ve been in a constant disagreement with your ex-boyfriend before he broke up with you and especially if you end things up with a fight, then you know there is some serious amount of accumulated unsaid words, and all the things that were bothering you both on a subconscious level.<\/p>\n

Ogni relazione \u00e8 unica, ma sapete cosa hanno in comune tutte le relazioni? I conflitti. In ogni relazione ci sono momenti in cui si ha voglia di urlare, gridare e letteralmente uccidersi a vicenda per qualche motivo.<\/p>\n

E ci sono momenti in cui tutto sar\u00e0 in perfetto ordine.<\/p>\n

E ogni volta che pensate di dire o discutere qualcosa con il vostro partner o viceversa e decidete di non farlo, create un divario sempre pi\u00f9 grande tra di voi.<\/p>\n

Tutte le parole non dette iniziano ad accumularsi e alla fine, in qualche modo, devono scoppiare.<\/p>\n

The same thing goes for disagreements. It’s perfectly normal that two people don’t agree on everything, but that doesn’t mean you can’t compromise. <\/p>\n

If you’re both determined to only push your own agenda instead of listening to the other side and trying to find some mutual things that you actually agree on, your relationship becomes filled with toxicity due to unresolved matters. Your relationship ends before he even decided to end it in the first place .<\/p>\n

Si \u00e8 spaventato perch\u00e9 la relazione si sta muovendo troppo velocemente<\/h2>\n

\"unWhen a guy ends a relationship before it even starts officially, women often think that it’s because they are afraid to commit.<\/p>\n

They classify the guy as the ultimate commitment-phobe because there’s simply no other logical explanation for what he’s just done.<\/p>\n

Ma, credetemi, c'\u00e8. Nel 99,9 % dei casi, quando un ragazzo decide di <\/b>fine delle cose<\/b> early on, it’s because he got scared of the fact that the relationship was moving too quickly. <\/b><\/p>\n

Maybe he got scared of your decision to sleep with him on the first date, of you wanting him to introduce you to his family and best friends the next day , demanding that he keeps sending you text messages even when he’s busy, or neglecting your own life only to hang out with your significant other .<\/p>\n

Forse ha sentito la pressione da parte vostra perch\u00e9 continuavate a spingerlo ad accogliervi nella sua vita con la forza invece di seguire il percorso naturale.<\/p>\n

And, because of that, maybe he realized that this new life with you is not something he actually wants or enjoys, and that’s why he decided to replace the title of you being a new girlfriend with one of being an ex girlfriend. <\/p>\n

Pensate alla prima volta che vi siete incontrati e a come si sono sviluppate le cose da quel momento in poi. Pensate all'ultima volta che avete parlato con lui.<\/p>\n

Vi ha mai dato un indizio del fatto che si sentiva come se la relazione si stesse muovendo troppo velocemente? Se s\u00ec, allora sapete che \u00e8 esattamente quello che \u00e8 successo per tutto questo tempo.<\/p>\n

Imbroglio<\/h2>\n

\"unThere’s no excuse for cheating. If you cheated on your now ex-boyfriend , then you already know the reason why he broke up with you . <\/p>\n

But, there is also a possibility that he cheated on you, but didn’t tell you. And his guilty conscience haunted him for so long that he needed to do something about it.<\/p>\n

He couldn’t live with the fact that he’s been with another woman, that he lied to you behind your back, and maybe that’s why he was the one to initiate a breakup.<\/p>\n

Ora, <\/b>come fare per sapere che ti ha tradito<\/b><\/a>? <\/b><\/p>\n

The most common signs of a partner’s infidelity are excuses like Tesoro, io <\/i> didn\u2019t <\/i> renderlo <\/i> ieri sera <\/i> , <\/i> la scorsa settimana <\/i> , o <\/i> il mese scorso <\/i> perch\u00e9 avevo bisogno di rimanere pi\u00f9 a lungo al lavoro; <\/i> passare del tempo su app di incontri (di nascosto); o avere una relazione a distanza (\u00e8 successo a una mia amica e al suo ex fidanzato, che si sono traditi nel primo anno della loro relazione). <\/p>\n

In case he really cheated on you, there’s no need to even try to get your ex back or give him a second chance .<\/p>\n

The right decision would be doing the following: the No contact rule , blocking him on Whatsapp and other social networks, and letting go of him for good regardless of whether you’ve been in a 2 year relationship or a 10 year relationship . <\/p>\n

Fare di lui la vostra unica priorit\u00e0<\/h2>\n

\"l'uomoWhen you’re deeply in love with someone, it’s so easy to start focusing only on them and start prioritizing them to the extent of neglecting everyone around you, your hobbies, and things you used to enjoy before. But, relationships can’t function that way.<\/p>\n

When this happens, there’s a huge imbalance in a relationship where one partner is constantly going out of their way to do everything for the other.<\/p>\n

L'altro, di conseguenza, inizia a sentirsi in trappola e presto decide di rompere lo schema proponendo una rottura.<\/p>\n

If the majority of the time you focused only on his needs, his problems and everything that was going on in his life by neglecting yours completely, then you know you’ve made him your only priority which was not healthy, neither for you nor your relationship.<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n

A lungo andare, questo pu\u00f2 danneggiare seriamente anche la vostra autostima, fino a farvi perdere la vostra identit\u00e0.<\/p>\n

So, if you suspect this was the case, it’s important that you first work on finding yourself again and then, if you still want, suggest that you try being together again.<\/p>\n

Si dice che per amare un altro essere umano bisogna prima imparare ad amare se stessi.<\/p>\n

You need to keep maintaining your connections outside your romantic relationship and keep on enjoying things you used to because that’s who you really are, and that’s whom he fell in love with.<\/p>\n

He thinks there’s something better outside the relationship<\/h2>\n

\"unQuesto \u00e8 anche noto come La sindrome dell'erba pi\u00f9 verde <\/i> . It’s when you think that there’s always something better than what you already have. It’s when you think that you would be happier with someone else than with the person you’re with at the moment.<\/p>\n

And maybe that’s what your ex thought as well. Maybe the reason why he broke up with you is because he constantly thought that there’s something better outside your relationship.<\/p>\n

This happens a lot, and in most cases, it happens to men who are not that experienced. They have this constant anxiety that they’re missing something out there.<\/p>\n

But, this is not a valid excuse for sure. There’s no way you can tame a man or be with a man who is constantly on the lookout for something better, greater.<\/p>\n

You don’t want to turn into an overly controlling woman whose main priority is stalking her boyfriend. <\/p>\n

You want to unfriend him on all social networks, keep living your best life, and let him aimlessly continue searching for “perfection”.<\/p>\n

And I can assure you that he’ll never find what he’s looking for because he himself has no idea what he really wants. <\/p>\n

Even if he was with a Victoria Secrets model in a relationship, he would still think that there’s something better.<\/p>\n

It’s a serious issue, and it takes a lot of time to deal with this syndrome. It takes a lot of practice and time for one to learn to appreciate what they already have.<\/p>\n

Vedi anche: 10 segni della sindrome dell'erba pi\u00f9 verde e come superarla <\/a><\/p>\n

Relazione a distanza<\/h2>\n

\"l'uomoO forse il motivo per cui il vostro ragazzo vi ha lasciate \u00e8 che eravate in una situazione di relazione a distanza <\/a> per qualche tempo.<\/p>\n

Questo significa pi\u00f9 messaggi e meno comunicazione di qualit\u00e0 di persona, pi\u00f9 tempo trascorso sui social media, che sono i principali responsabili di tutti i potenziali scoppi di gelosia, e tutto ci\u00f2 significa l'indebolimento dei vostri legami emotivi e fisici. <\/p>\n

In base alla mia esperienza personale e a quella delle persone a me vicine, posso dire con certezza che non sono molte le persone che riescono a superare le sfide delle relazioni a distanza.<\/p>\n

Per lo pi\u00f9, si conclude con il desiderio di avere una relazione normale con qualcuno che si possa vedere pi\u00f9 spesso e che si possa sentire accanto a s\u00e9. <\/p>\n

That’s why, most of the time, a long-distance relationship results in infidelity.<\/p>\n

And this has nothing to do with how strong your love is. It’s mostly a question of your character and personality.<\/p>\n

For example, if you’re an extrovert, you will naturally be inclined to go out more often and to search for other connections which may result in completely forgetting what you already have and focusing on what you can have at the place where you are at the moment. <\/p>\n

But, there’s no need to worry because this doesn’t have to be true in your case.<\/p>\n

Forse la vostra relazione a distanza si \u00e8 esaurita naturalmente e l'unica cosa da fare \u00e8 separare le vostre strade.<\/p>\n

Perhaps your boyfriend couldn’t endure it any longer, and he decided that splitting up is the best decision for the both of you.<\/p>\n

PARTE SECONDA: IL MIO RAGAZZO MI HA LASCIATA: COSA FARE DOPO?<\/h2>\n

\"unaNow that we’ve gone through the possible reasons why your boyfriend broke up with you, it’s time to focus on what you will do next! This part will cover the main things you should focus on if you want to move on for good, or if you want to get him back. It will also cover some things that you should never do, no matter how much you want to reunite with your ex.<\/p>\n

Ready? Let’s get started!<\/p>\n

If you want to move on, you should…<\/p>\n

Concentratevi sulla scoperta di chi siete senza di lui<\/h2>\n

\"l'uomoDopo una rottura, la prima cosa essenziale che dovete fare per voi stesse \u00e8 concentrarvi sulla ricerca di chi siete senza di lui.<\/p>\n

When you’re in a relationship (especially for a long time), you lose a part of yourself because you were solely focused on maintaining and fighting for what you have with your loved one.<\/p>\n

Si smette di fare le cose che prima piacevano. Si scende spesso a compromessi.<\/p>\n

You become more focused on your partner’s happiness than your own. And now is the perfect time to change that. <\/p>\n

\u00c8 il momento perfetto per ritrovare la passione che \u00e8 in voi, per trovare un nuovo hobby, per impegnarvi con voi stessi e con le persone che significano molto per voi.<\/p>\n

Now is the perfect time to spoil yourself with long, bubble baths; with your favorite cake, TV show or a drink. Don’t let him define your being\u2014think about who you truly are without him.<\/p>\n

In questo modo, sar\u00e0 pi\u00f9 facile per voi guarire dal vostro cuore spezzato, ed \u00e8 anche la base perfetta per una relazione sana se mai deciderete di riunirvi di nuovo.<\/p>\n

Pensate a ci\u00f2 che volete per voi stessi<\/h2>\n

\"laInvece di pensare solo alla vostra relazione fallita e a tutte le cose che avreste potuto avere in futuro, pensate a ci\u00f2 che volete per voi stessi.<\/p>\n

Invece di pensare solo a quella frase: My boyfriend broke up with me and I don\u2019t know what to do <\/i> , ask yourself whether you really want to be in a relationship with someone who clearly, for some reason, doesn’t want the same thing?<\/p>\n

Do you want to continue being in a relationship that is not reciprocal? If your answer is \u2018no\u2019, then you’re ready to move on.<\/p>\n

E smettete di pensare che sia solo colpa vostra se la vostra relazione \u00e8 andata in pezzi.<\/p>\n

Smettete di pensare che se aveste fatto qualcosa di diverso, sareste stati ancora insieme.<\/p>\n

Even if you cheated on him, your decision to do so didn’t happen overnight.<\/p>\n

Entrambi ne siete responsabili. Qualunque sia il motivo, ricordate che tutte le piccole cose che sono accadute nella vostra relazione da entrambe le parti hanno contribuito a fargli decidere di rompere. <\/p>\n

Una volta che la vostra mente avr\u00e0 assorbito tutto questo, diventerete liberi e comincerete a pensare pi\u00f9 chiaramente a ci\u00f2 che volete per voi stessi, invece di pensare solo al vostro passato.<\/p>\n

Fate un elenco di priorit\u00e0 per la vostra nuova vita<\/h2>\n

\"laIf you want to move on, it’s essential that you make a list of priorities for your new life .<\/p>\n

Scrivete alcune cose che volete realizzare nel prossimo futuro. Se volete finalmente imparare a suonare quello strumento, scrivetelo.<\/p>\n

If you want to focus on improving your connection with other people that you didn’t have time for lately, write it down.<\/p>\n

Se volete concentrarvi sulla vostra carriera, scrivetelo. Se volete dedicare il vostro tempo ai vostri nuovi hobby, scrivetelo.<\/p>\n

It’s important that you set the goals you want to achieve because that will prevent you from constantly thinking only about your ex.<\/p>\n

It will help you move on faster because when you’re fully focused on things that matter to you in life, you become the best version of yourself.<\/p>\n

You become fulfilled, and you certainly don’t have time to think about texting your ex or liking his pictures on social media .<\/p>\n

And if someday in the future, you happen to reunite for some reason, it will be easier to maintain a healthy relationship when you’ve already set your priorities. <\/p>\n

La regola dell'assenza di contatto<\/h2>\n

\"unI’m pretty sure you’re all familiar with the no contact rule .<\/p>\n

It basically means cutting all contact with your ex\u2014blocking him on social media , not calling or texting him, not seeing him, and deleting his number if needed. <\/p>\n

The no contact rule needs to be applied ASAP after a breakup because the sooner you cut all contact, the sooner you’ll heal and move on.<\/p>\n

Questa regola \u00e8 stata inventata per aiutarvi a disintossicarvi da tutta la negativit\u00e0 accumulata nella vostra relazione e per aiutarvi a vedere le cose con maggiore chiarezza. <\/p>\n

Dopo tutto, sapete come si dice: “Far from the eyes, far from the heart” <\/i> .<\/p>\n

Vedi anche: Leggete questa frase ogni volta che vi viene voglia di mandargli un messaggio, anche se sapete che non dovreste farlo. <\/a><\/p>\n

Evitare tutto ci\u00f2 che vi ricorda lui<\/h2>\n

\"unaSe volete dimenticarlo e andare avanti a tempo di record, dovete evitare rigorosamente tutto ci\u00f2 che vi ricorda lui.<\/p>\n

This includes things that he’s given you for your birthday and all the other gifts, going to the same restaurant you went to with him, going for a walk along the same route you went with him, and so on.<\/p>\n

If you don’t want to discard everything he’s given to you, just put it in a bag and hide it somewhere in the house until you recover from your breakup and until those things start to mean nothing to you.<\/p>\n

Sarebbe sorprendente vedere come il cervello umano possa facilmente disconnettersi da cose che un tempo significavano molto per una persona. <\/p>\n

Per esempio, ho ancora dei vestiti del mio ex che indosso regolarmente e raramente penso a lui quando li indosso.<\/p>\n

Non collego pi\u00f9 quei vestiti alla persona di cui ero innamorata, ma piuttosto a qualcuno che un tempo faceva parte della mia vita e che ora \u00e8 solo un lontano ricordo.<\/p>\n

Smettere di parlare di lui con altre persone <\/h2>\n

\"laL'errore numero uno che molte persone commettono dopo una rottura \u00e8 quello di parlare costantemente del proprio ex con gli amici o le persone vicine.<\/p>\n

Pensano che continuando a parlare di cose accadute nella relazione o di come il loro partner sia stato un vero e proprio stronzo, in qualche modo si cureranno magicamente da tutto il dolore che provano.<\/p>\n

But, this will only do the opposite. The longer you mention your ex\u2019s name and the longer you talk about him to other people, the longer you’ll feel miserable, and it will be impossible for you to move on.<\/p>\n

It doesn’t matter if you’re mentioning his name in a positive or negative connotation because as long as he’s on your mind, you will not be able to think clearly and to do the right thing.<\/p>\n

So, when you’re spending time with your friends, talk about all the fun things that you used to do before instead and make plans for the future.<\/p>\n

Parlate della vita, ridete delle cose che vanno di moda al momento, parlate di qualsiasi cosa, ma non parlate del vostro ex.<\/p>\n

Se lo incontrate, mantenete la calma e andate avanti.<\/h2>\n

\"setQuesto \u00e8 uno degli incubi pi\u00f9 grandi per tutti coloro che vogliono dimenticare il proprio ex. Passano molto tempo a pensare a cosa direbbero o farebbero nel caso li incontrassero.<\/p>\n

They start thinking about tons of possible case scenarios, but they can’t decide which one they prefer most.<\/p>\n

If you’re one of those people, forget about all of it. In case you run into your ex, the only thing you need to remember is to stay calm and move on.<\/p>\n

Do not succumb to temptation to tell him everything that’s on your mind, to yell at him, let alone to start crying in front of him.<\/p>\n

You don’t want to show him your weaknesses, and you don’t want him to think that you’re still crazy about him and that you’ll do anything just to reunite with him (even if all of this is true).<\/p>\n

You need to focus on moving on because you owe it to yourself, and that’s why you should take a deep breath, stay calm, say a few words if you must and move on.<\/p>\n

Vedi anche: Se tornate da lui (sapendo che non dovreste farlo) ecco cosa succeder\u00e0 <\/a><\/p>\n

Ripetere tutto quanto sopra fino a quando non cambia qualcosa.<\/h2>\n

\"laMolte persone pensano che se fanno tutte le cose di cui sopra, dimenticheranno il loro ex entro domani o entro la prossima settimana. Ma non \u00e8 cos\u00ec che funzionano le cose.<\/p>\n

I won’t lie to you. There will be moments when you will want to contact your ex, when you will want to do anything just to reach him even though you know you shouldn’t.<\/p>\n

There will be times when you will want to give up on trying to move on because it won’t be easy.<\/p>\n

Sar\u00e0 difficile, ma ogni volta che avrete voglia di arrendervi o vi sembrer\u00e0 che queste cose non funzionino, continuate a farle finch\u00e9 non inizierete a vedere i risultati.<\/p>\n

Continuate a ripetere quanto sopra finch\u00e9 non cambia qualcosa, perch\u00e9, credetemi, cambier\u00e0.<\/p>\n

Non importa quanto siate confusi e disperati al momento, un giorno, in un futuro prossimo, vi sveglierete e vi renderete conto di non pensare pi\u00f9 al vostro ex. <\/p>\n

And until that day comes, you mustn’t give up, and you mustn’t think that you’re too weak to follow your own path.<\/p>\n

You’re a strong, independent woman, and you can do whatever the hell you want, only if you want to! Don’t ever forget that.<\/p>\n

If you want him back, you should…<\/h2>\n

\"laSe decidete che volete ricongiungervi a lui e che lo volete indietro, dovete fare esattamente le stesse cose di cui sopra come se voleste andare avanti. <\/p>\n

\u00c8 necessario fare tutto allo stesso modo perch\u00e9, una volta applicate queste otto regole, i risultati possibili sono due: O lo dimenticherete e andrete avanti o lui vi contatter\u00e0 prima o poi.<\/b> .<\/p>\n

And sometimes these two outcomes come in one package, and it’s up to you whether you want to delete him from your life permanently or try again. <\/p>\n

Il mio modesto consiglio \u00e8 che l'unico momento in cui dovreste prendere in considerazione l'idea di tornare con lui \u00e8 se provate ancora dei forti sentimenti per lui, se credete che voi due siate fatti l'uno per l'altra e se riuscirete a sistemare le cose. <\/p>\n

Una volta applicate queste otto regole, sarete pronte a iniziare un nuovo capitolo con o senza di lui, il che \u00e8 essenziale quando si tratta di stabilire una relazione sana e felice o di continuare a vivere la vostra vita migliore da sole.<\/p>\n

COSA NON SI DOVREBBE MAI FARE?<\/h2>\n

\"unaSe il desiderio di raggiungere il vostro ex diventa incontrollabile, dovete ricordare a voi stessi quanto segue: Non dovete mai cercare di convincere il vostro ex a restare con voi! <\/b> Perch\u00e9?<\/p>\n

Perch\u00e9 questa \u00e8 la cosa peggiore che possiate fare. Vi dannegger\u00e0 e lo render\u00e0 ancora pi\u00f9 distante.<\/p>\n

E se avete bisogno di altri motivi, ecco alcune cose che il vostro ex potrebbe pensare di voi se cercate di convincerlo a restare con voi:<\/p>\n

Vi considerer\u00e0 egoisti e infantili.<\/h2>\n

\"l'uomoSe lo chiamate continuamente o gli mandate messaggi per cercare di convincerlo che dovrebbe cambiare idea e tornare da voi, vi considerer\u00e0 egoiste e infantili.<\/p>\n

He will think of you as selfish or childish because you don’t think about how he feels about everything and the reasons why he did that in the first place . <\/p>\n

It will look like the only one you’re thinking about is yourself and how you will feel once you reunite again. And you don’t want that.<\/p>\n

You don’t want to be that kind of woman because it’s both toxic for your well-being, and it will not bring you anything good. <\/p>\n

Avr\u00e0 paura di cambiare idea<\/h2>\n

\"l'uomoSe continuate a perseguitarlo e a cercare di convincerlo a restare con voi, gli farete venire paura di cambiare idea perch\u00e9 sapr\u00e0 che se decider\u00e0 di lasciarvi di nuovo, succeder\u00e0 questo.<\/p>\n

Avr\u00e0 paura che tu perda di nuovo la testa una volta che la vostra relazione scadr\u00e0 naturalmente o se succede qualcosa di brutto.<\/p>\n

E a nessuno piace sentirsi costretto a fare qualcosa solo perch\u00e9 qualcun altro vuole che lo faccia.<\/p>\n

Dovete lasciargli decidere da solo se vuole ricongiungersi a voi o meno.<\/p>\n

Non gli darete abbastanza spazio e tempo per sentire la vostra mancanza.<\/h2>\n

\"unCercare di convincere il vostro ex ragazzo a rimanere con voi significa non dargli abbastanza spazio e tempo per sentire la vostra mancanza.<\/p>\n

And that’s the main reason why you need to apply those eight rules above. <\/p>\n

After a breakup, it’s essential that you give yourself enough time to think about what happened, to find yourself again, and to give him space and time as well to do the same.<\/p>\n

In seguito, tutto sar\u00e0 diverso per entrambi e saprete cosa fare.<\/p>\n

Quello che dovete fare \u00e8 lasciare che le cose accadano a un ritmo naturale! <\/h2>\n

\"laApply those eight rules and wait to see the results. If you’ve decided with all of your body and heart that you’re moving on then, don’t stop practising those rules until you finally succeed.<\/p>\n

If you still want him back (for the right reasons), then give him some space and time to see that you’re a different woman and that you’re perfectly capable of being on your own.<\/p>\n

And if he decides to reach you, don’t jump on him like he’s the only man in the world. <\/p>\n

Continuate a nutrire il vostro <\/b>la propria vita<\/b> and keep being the strong woman that you are. If he recognizes it, then you know he’s the right man for you. <\/b><\/p>\n

Se lui \u00e8 d'accordo nel fare uno sforzo reciproco, nel nutrire il rispetto reciproco e nel lottare disinteressatamente per riportare la scintilla nella vostra relazione, allora sapete che tornare con lui era la cosa giusta da fare!<\/p>\n

Qualunque sia la vostra scelta, vi auguro buona fortuna (e tanta pazienza)!<\/p>\n

Vedi anche: La regola delle tre settimane per le rotture che dovete assolutamente seguire <\/a><\/p>\n

\"Il<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

“My boyfriend broke up with me. What do I do, say, and how do I deal with this?” If your boyfriend just broke up with you, I want you to know that I understand the complexity of emotions that you feel at the moment. I understand your pain and this uncontrollable urge to tell him…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":13,"featured_media":120774,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29628],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-51215","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-dealing-with-breakup"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29628,"label":"dealing with breakup"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/01\/My-Boyfriend-Broke-Up-With-Me-What-To-Do-Next-1024x684.jpg",1024,684,true],"author_info":{"display_name":"April Callaghan","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/author\/april\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29628,"name":"dealing with breakup","slug":"dealing-with-breakup","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29628,"taxonomy":"category","description":"Breakups are painful but worry not; you don't need to go through all of it alone. If you need advice on when and how to break up, you'll find it all here.\r\n","parent":29627,"count":263,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29628,"category_count":263,"category_description":"Breakups are painful but worry not; you don't need to go through all of it alone. If you need advice on when and how to break up, you'll find it all here.\r\n","cat_name":"dealing with breakup","category_nicename":"dealing-with-breakup","category_parent":29627}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/51215","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/13"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=51215"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/51215\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/120774"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=51215"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=51215"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=51215"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}