{"id":6629,"date":"2017-10-11T09:28:46","date_gmt":"2017-10-11T09:28:46","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/herway.net\/?p=6629"},"modified":"2021-08-12T11:45:07","modified_gmt":"2021-08-12T11:45:07","slug":"perche-sono-rimasto","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/perche-sono-rimasto\/","title":{"rendered":"Perch\u00e9 sono rimasto"},"content":{"rendered":"

Everybody asks: \u201cWhy did you stay?\u201d, \u201cHow could you put up with that kind of treatment?\u201d, \u201cI would\u2019ve just left.\u201d I\u2019ve asked those same questions to others and made the same statements. But until you\u2019re inside the relationship, you have no idea what it\u2019s like. <\/span>
\n<\/span>
\n<\/span>I am kind and trusting, and I can honestly say this was so very different from any other beginning. I didn\u2019t even see it coming. This didn\u2019t start with sex and build from there as my relationships usually do. There were no sexual innuendos, no come-on\u2019s, no flirting; there were intelligent, mind-stimulating conversations, good advice both given and received, and quiet comfortable company. I fell in love with his mind, his friendship, his soul. <\/span>
\n<\/span>
\n<\/span>Guardando indietro, vedo chiaramente che non ero sicura di chi fossi e di quale fosse il mio posto. Ero una mamma single, divorziata da poco, reduce da una riabilitazione per abuso di alcol. Non avevo pi\u00f9 contatti con la maggior parte dei miei parenti stretti e stavo lottando per riconquistare il rispetto e la fiducia nel mio lavoro potente, ben pagato ed estremamente stressante, che era l'unico sostegno per me e i miei due figli. <\/span><\/p>\n

Potevo sfuggire al mondo strutturato in cui vivevo e lavoravo ed essere me stessa con lui. Nel suo mondo, nessuno giudicava e tutti capivano che ognuno di noi aveva delle difficolt\u00e0 che non erano n\u00e9 migliori n\u00e9 peggiori dell'altro. <\/span>
\n<\/span>
\n<\/span>But not knowing who you are and where you belong puts you in an extremely vulnerable and dangerous position if you\u2019re not careful. The more time I spent with him, the more we shared our individual hopes, dreams and greatest fears. Ho iniziato a innamorarmi di lui e alla fine la nostra amicizia si \u00e8 trasformata in un'avventura.<\/a> went to the next level\u2014at my persuasion. <\/span>
\n<\/span>
\n<\/span>And I was completely taken aback by his bold displays of love and affection. It was obvious to anyone around us that we were together\u2014whether it be my hand on his back, his hand rubbing my leg, or his loving kiss goodbye in front of everyone. Friends and acquaintances that had known him for years said they\u2019d never seen him behave this way. <\/span><\/p>\n

Questi stessi amici mi hanno ripetuto pi\u00f9 volte quanto gli piacessi, quanto fosse interessato a me, quanto mi volesse intorno, quanto mi rispettasse, ecc. Ho visto questo ragazzo duro e cattivo abbassare la guardia e permettermi di sperimentare l'uomo amorevole, morbido e compassionevole che voleva essere toccato e amato.<\/span>
\n<\/span>
\n<\/span>And love him I did. I valued and loved him dearly as my friend and that only deepened to a level I\u2019d never experienced. I was blown away by the depth and intensity of love I felt for him. In 21 years of marriage, children, and growing up with my ex husband, I never once felt the connection and depth of love as I did with him. Yet I knew from the beginning Lo amavo pi\u00f9 di quanto lui amasse me. <\/a><\/span>
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"Donna<\/p>\n


\n<\/span>I loved him with all of me\u2014with wild, reckless abandonment and would have moved heaven and earth for him. And for a short time, I was truly happy and content. I will always question if my love for him was too intense and was to blame for the demise of us. <\/span><\/p>\n

Did my intensity scare him, blind him, overwhelm him? Or was this the predestined fate of the universe to teach me something? There\u2019s no answer to my \u2018whys\u2019 and no point to asking \u2018what if\u2019s\u2019 because there\u2019s no way to get closure on anything that breaks you as wide open as he broke me. <\/span>
\n<\/span>
\n<\/span>A distanza di mesi, mi guardo indietro e mi rendo conto di essere stata intimidita, manipolata, mentita e minacciata. Ho subito il trattamento del silenzio, sono stata ignorata e respinta. Sono stata brutalmente picchiata, demoralizzata e sono tornata indietro per averne ancora. L'uomo di cui mi ero innamorata \u00e8 sparito dopo poche settimane dalla fine della nostra relazione sessuale. <\/span><\/p>\n

Ma ora mi chiedo if the whole relationship wasn\u2019t just an illusion<\/a> e mi sono ritrovata con gravi problemi di fiducia. Avevo sempre avuto fiducia nel mio intuito, nella mia percezione e nel mio giudizio, ma improvvisamente dubitavo di tutto ci\u00f2 che facevo.  <\/span>
\n<\/span>
\n<\/span>I wish I could say I was one of those brave, strong women you read about that wakes up and realizes she\u2019s worth more and leaves, but that\u2019s not my story. He left my bed one morning after an incredibly loving weekend and never came back.  He woke up one day and decided not to talk to me, not to tell me goodbye, nothing. And I was left reeling for months wondering what I did wrong, why wasn\u2019t I good enough, and blaming myself for not proving myself worthy enough for his love. <\/span>
\n<\/span>
\n<\/span>Ora lotto con gli estremi polari delle emozioni che provo. Amo profondamente e mi manca il suo lato gentile e garbato, ma odio e temo l'altro lato cattivo e violento. Come potrei sentire la mancanza di qualcuno che \u00e8 stato responsabile di un comportamento cos\u00ec vile nei miei confronti? Come potrei desiderare qualcuno che ha violentemente colpito il mio corpo con il suo odio, pur affermando di amarmi? Lo faccio perch\u00e9 l'amore che ho provato era cos\u00ec incredibilmente potente che ha scavalcato e messo in ombra qualsiasi intelletto. <\/span>
\n<\/span>
\n<\/span>E cos\u00ec inizio il mio viaggio, un piccolo passo alla volta, per liberarmi dalle potenti morse dell'amore disilluso e camminare verso l'amore di s\u00e9 e la pace. <\/span>
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

di Cindy Richards<\/strong><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Everybody asks: \u201cWhy did you stay?\u201d, \u201cHow could you put up with that kind of treatment?\u201d, \u201cI would\u2019ve just left.\u201d I\u2019ve asked those same questions to others and made the same statements. But until you\u2019re inside the relationship, you have no idea what it\u2019s like. I am kind and trusting, and I can honestly say…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":40,"featured_media":6634,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29619],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6629","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-stories-love"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29619,"label":"stories"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/10\/allef-vinicius-244440.jpg",800,533,false],"author_info":{"display_name":"Tara Brown","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/author\/tara-brown\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29619,"name":"stories","slug":"stories-love","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29619,"taxonomy":"category","description":"To all the souls struggling with complicated love experiences: These heartfelt stories about love, heartbreak, and moving on will be your voice of wisdom.","parent":38,"count":424,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29619,"category_count":424,"category_description":"To all the souls struggling with complicated love experiences: These heartfelt stories about love, heartbreak, and moving on will be your voice of wisdom.","cat_name":"stories","category_nicename":"stories-love","category_parent":38}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6629","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/40"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6629"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6629\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/6634"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6629"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6629"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6629"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}