{"id":6786,"date":"2017-10-13T12:52:28","date_gmt":"2017-10-13T12:52:28","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/herway.net\/?p=6786"},"modified":"2022-07-23T09:25:22","modified_gmt":"2022-07-23T09:25:22","slug":"una-femmina-unaltra-importanza-lamore-per-se-stessi-convinto-di-lasciare-una-relazione-tossica","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/una-femmina-unaltra-importanza-lamore-per-se-stessi-convinto-di-lasciare-una-relazione-tossica\/","title":{"rendered":"Da una donna all'altra: L'importanza dell'amore per se stessi e cosa mi ha convinto a lasciare una relazione tossica"},"content":{"rendered":"

This isn\u2019t a letter sugar-coating today\u2019s idea of a relationship. This isn\u2019t a letter trying to convince you to believe in God. This isn\u2019t a letter about feminism nor is it from a feminist perspective. This isn\u2019t a letter meant to place unattainable expectations on today\u2019s men in a relationship. <\/span><\/p>\n

Let\u2019s be honest: This generation\u2019s idea of a relationship can be pretty pathetic. However, not all relationships are detrimental. Mine just happened to be. This is simply a letter of empowerment, from one female to another, filled with important reminders we may forget to apply in our life; maybe because we\u2019re the type to tolerate more than we should from others in fear of losing them altogether. <\/span><\/p>\n

Ma ci\u00f2 di cui dovremmo avere pi\u00f9 paura perdere di conseguenza \u00e8 noi stessi.<\/a> I am a survivor of a toxic relationship, and you can be, too. These are the words I wish I had been given as advice before I engaged in my first serious relationship. I can\u2019t help but think I wouldn\u2019t have stayed as long as I did if I\u2019d had this advice and applied it. <\/span><\/p>\n

L'amore non ha un libro di regole. L'amore non ha un manuale di istruzioni. Per quanto sia difficile da accettare, l'amore \u00e8 un successo o una sconfitta. Tuttavia, le crepe che pu\u00f2 lasciare sul vostro cuore sono permanenti. Da una donna a un'altra, ecco tredici promemoria che vi daranno la forza di aggrapparvi al vostro viaggio per trovare l'amore. Scriveteli. Appendeteli sopra la scrivania. Rendeteli responsabili. <\/span><\/p>\n

1. Finch\u00e9 un uomo tossico non guarisce se stesso, sar\u00e0 tossico per ogni donna che cercher\u00e0 di amarlo.<\/span> <\/b><\/h1>\n

Per quanto sia difficile da sentire, non si pu\u00f2 cambiare qualcuno<\/a> che non vede un problema nelle proprie azioni. Un uomo non agisce bene se non vuole farlo. Non perdete il sonno per cose fuori dal vostro controllo o dalla vostra giurisdizione. Lasciarlo potrebbe essere la sua pi\u00f9 grande lezione e la sua pi\u00f9 grande perdita. Ricordate: Dio \u00e8 l'unico che pu\u00f2 cambiare qualcuno. Questo posso prometterlo: lasciatelo nelle sue mani e le vostre ansie svaniranno.<\/span><\/p>\n

2. Un vero uomo non vi priver\u00e0 di nulla.<\/b><\/span><\/h1>\n

He is not the one for you if he doesn\u2019t take your relationship needs or wants into consideration. We, as females, need reassurance and validation. This is not an unrealistic demand but rather it should be a more natural desire to do things for somebody. What you ask for will be  \u2018too much\u2019 from the wrong person. L'uomo giusto andr\u00e0 oltre<\/a> e che ingoier\u00e0 il suo orgoglio senza che voi dobbiate chiederglielo. <\/span><\/p>\n

Reciprocation is also fundamental. You should never have to guess or wonder how he feels about you. Failure to see a reciprocation in feelings or behavior unless asked for is a red flag. A real man will show you off – in public, on social media, in front of his friends, in front of his family, and not because he feels obligated, not because he\u2019s trying to prove a point, but because he genuinely wants to. <\/span><\/p>\n

L'uomo che fa per voi \u00e8 quello che \u00e8 estremamente orgoglioso di avervi e lo trasmette al mondo. State con l'uomo che vi fa complimenti a caso e non manca mai di ricordarvi quanto siete belle e quanto \u00e8 fortunato come uomo. L'uomo per te sar\u00e0 incredulo di avere l'onore di chiamarti sua. <\/span><\/p>\n

3. Non si deve cambiare ci\u00f2 che si \u00e8 per piacere a qualcuno.<\/b> <\/span><\/h1>\n

You are never \u2018too much\u2019; your \u2018extra\u2019 qualities for one man is another man\u2019s desire for more. Love is not someone trying to change you, whether that be how you look, your personality, your behavior, or your beliefs. The only thing he should pursue  to change is your last name. He should take you exactly how you are, because you are perfect, one-of-a-kind, unmatched, and authentic. <\/span><\/p>\n

Se oggi volete vestirvi e truccarvi da sole, fatelo. Non lasciate che qualche l'uomo tossico ti fa sentire<\/a> bad about looking like a ten, even if he\u2019s not around to see it. Remember: Nobody can do you better than you can. If you do feel the desire to work on yourself or see room for self-improvement, a real man will be nothing less than supportive of that.<\/span><\/p>\n

4. Il vostro valore \u00e8 superiore a qualsiasi somma di denaro<\/b><\/span>.<\/span> <\/span><\/h1>\n

Tu sei sufficiente. Non date a nessun altro il potere di determinare il vostro valore. <\/a>Just because someone else does not recognize your value does not mean you are any less desirable. If he makes you feel unworthy of love or happiness, he is not the one. Your kindness, commitment to him and unconditional love should not be labeled as weakness and should not be taken advantage of. After giving your all to someone who may not have deserved it, just imagine what you\u2019ll do for the right one.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"Donna<\/p>\n

5. Meritate un impegno.<\/b><\/span><\/h1>\n

Smettete di trovare scuse per un uomo che non si impegna con voi. Un uomo che vi vuole vi inseguir\u00e0 a tutta forza. A <\/span>ragazzo<\/span><\/i> \u00e8 velleitario. A <\/span>uomo<\/span><\/i> knows what he wants and is not indecisive. There are too many fish in the sea to settle for the one who doesn\u2019t seek to love you correctly. Do not lose sleep over someone who has to figure out if you\u2019re worth it or not. L'indecisione \u00e8 anche una decisione.<\/a> <\/span><\/p>\n

Involving yourself with someone without a title yields more emotional destruction than improvement. Do not award someone boyfriend privileges when he is not fully committed to you. A real man will not play with your feelings like it\u2019s a game and will not entertain any other woman who isn\u2019t you. A man who wants you will work to understand every intimate detail of your mind, body, and soul. <\/span><\/p>\n

Remember: One man\u2019s, \u201cI\u2019m not ready to commit\u201d is another man\u2019s, \u201cShe\u2019s exactly who I\u2019ve been praying for.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

6. Non dovete sentirvi manipolati o controllati.<\/b><\/span><\/h1>\n

If he makes you feel at fault for all of your relationship problems, he is not the one for you. If he frequently plays the \u2018victim\u2019 card, this is a major indication you are dealing with a toxic man. You are not there to absorb the blame for every fallout. Similarly, believe this: The right man for you will not use your past faults against you, especially those obstacles you have fought so hard to overcome. <\/span><\/p>\n

State con l'uomo che rester\u00e0 con voi<\/a> anche durante i momenti difficili, e <\/span>reciprocamente<\/span><\/i> work through relationship issues that may arise. Threats to end or leave the relationship are signs of manipulation, and nonetheless are childish. The man for you will not make you feel like there was \u2018something more you could\u2019ve done\u2019 for your relationship. <\/span><\/p>\n

In addition, your significant other should not expect you to do anything you\u2019re uncomfortable with and then make you feel bad for it. Do not let some truffatore, ragazzo immaturo<\/a> sfruttarvi in questo modo. <\/span><\/p>\n

I veri uomini sono pazienti. Con un vero uomo, vi sentirete fidate. Si fider\u00e0 della vostra parola, il <\/span>prima<\/span><\/i> time, and your truth will not be a foreign concept. You will not feel afraid to go to him with anything or talk about what\u2019s on your mind, fearing how he\u2019ll respond. This is a trait I think all females yearn for. Most importantly, do not ever let a man convince you that you need him. Do not place the power to walk all over you in someone\u2019s hands.<\/span><\/p>\n

7. Non accontentatevi di meno di quanto meritate.<\/b><\/span><\/h1>\n

You deserve the world and are worthy of being treated like a queen. Choose to be the rare woman in today\u2019s society who is brave enough <\/span>non<\/span><\/i> di accontentarsi di una relazione qualsiasi, ma che cerca la relazione che Dio le ha riservato. Fate tesoro del vostro cuore, della vostra mente e del vostro corpo. Non siate disposti a dare via cos\u00ec facilmente questi oggetti di valore finch\u00e9 qualcuno non dimostrer\u00e0 di esserne degno. <\/span><\/p>\n

Be strong enough to refrain from giving someone your all until you\u2019re receiving their all. Most importantly, non accontentatevi di meno di quanto meritate<\/a> solo perch\u00e9 temete che non ci sia niente di meglio in futuro. La vita \u00e8 preziosa e il vostro tempo \u00e8 prezioso. Non sprecatelo con qualcuno che non vi apprezza. Non siete mediocri, quindi non lasciate che un uomo vi tratti come tratta tutti gli altri.<\/span><\/p>\n

8. Dovreste sentirvi apprezzati.<\/b><\/span><\/h1>\n

With the right man, you will not have to fight for his time or attention. You will not have to chase after him like he\u2019s a celebrity who barely has time for a fan. You will not feel in competition with other women. Your presence will not be a bother. You will not feel neglected or placed on the back burner. You will not feel average or replaceable. Your efforts will be noticed, appreciated, and reciprocated.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"Uomo<\/p>\n

9. Siate pazienti.<\/b><\/span><\/h1>\n

One day, maybe not today, everything will work out. Patience is a powerful virtue. One day, God will gift you with someone who gives you everything you\u2019d prayed for in your other half. Choose the guy who is husband material. Be with the man who prays he crosses paths with a woman like you. Seek relationships with long-term goals in mind. <\/span><\/p>\n

Do not stick with someone just because they\u2019re there. Be selective with who you choose to form an intimate bond with. If you are unhappy now in your relationship, just imagine how unhappy you\u2019ll be 10 or 20 years from now, in a marriage. You are young, with your whole life ahead of you. This time should be dedicated to exploring and discovering the kind of man you desire to be with for the rest of your life. Take out the trash when need be.<\/span><\/p>\n

Vedi anche:<\/strong> Rimani single finch\u00e9 non incontri un ragazzo come questo<\/a><\/p>\n

10. Siate consapevoli e onesti con voi stessi.<\/b><\/span><\/h1>\n

Do not give chances away like freebies. Allotting a male chance after chance only validates his behavior. He will only hurt you again, whether emotionally, mentally, or physically. Do not let love blind you or fall in love with a man\u2019s language or rhetoric. Hold him accountable by his actions only. Hypocritical men scream of toxicity. <\/span><\/p>\n

This will only result in emotional anxiety that holds no place in your life. Loving someone is not a free pass to overlook their bad qualities or red flags in the relationship. Be with the man who has good intentions for you. If he doesn\u2019t, accept it for what it is and remove yourself from the equation. <\/span><\/p>\n

Dovete rispettare e amare voi stessi abbastanza da risparmiare le vostre emozioni e le vostre energie per qualcuno che vi tratter\u00e0 come la regina<\/a> siete. \u00c8 importante riconoscere la differenza tra l'infatuazione e un legame reale. Un legame reale offre infiniti benefici. L'attaccamento vi succhier\u00e0 via la vita. <\/span><\/p>\n

11. I progressi nella vostra relazione e in voi stessi sono fondamentali.<\/b> <\/span><\/h1>\n

Dovreste not feel like you\u2019re forcing love or the relationship.<\/a> A relationship is an investment, meaning it should grow and flourish naturally. Your time and energy are precious. Stagnation in a relationship is a red flag you\u2019re being taken advantage of. Do not stick around for someone who does not offer mutual feelings or does not hold the same, healthy vision for your relationship.<\/span><\/p>\n

12. Meritate di essere sostenuti.<\/b><\/span><\/h1>\n

Se non sostiene i vostri obiettivi e le vostre aspirazioni, che sia d'accordo o meno, non \u00e8 l'uomo giusto. L'uomo giusto per voi sar\u00e0 il vostro pi\u00f9 grande ammiratore, vi riterr\u00e0 responsabili sotto tutti gli aspetti, incoragger\u00e0 e ispirer\u00e0 la vostra crescita personale e vi condurr\u00e0 verso la rettitudine, NON verso un comportamento immorale. <\/span><\/p>\n

In una relazione sana, voi come individui crescerete e prospererete senza problemi. Una relazione malsana vi frener\u00e0 sotto molti aspetti. Se notate che vi ritirate dalle altre relazioni, dagli hobby o dalle responsabilit\u00e0 solo per renderlo felice, non ignorate questa bandiera rossa. Questa \u00e8 una caratteristica di un individuo che controlla. Non rimanete in una relazione in cui vi sentite frenati. Essere in una relazione non significa non avere pi\u00f9 libert\u00e0 o autonomia.<\/span><\/p>\n

13. Anche la vostra felicit\u00e0 \u00e8 importante.<\/b><\/span><\/h1>\n

Do not sacrifice your happiness for someone else\u2019s. The right relationship will not cost you friends, family, space, things you love to do, prosperity, or opportunity. Choose yourself. Every single time. Self-love should be at the top of your priority list. One of the most dangerous choices you can make is placing your happiness into the hands of a significant other. <\/span><\/p>\n

Non prosciugatevi nel tentativo di rendere felice qualcuno che non vi ricambia il favore. Se lui \u00e8 felice, ma voi no, non ignorate questa bandiera rossa. La vostra felicit\u00e0 conta quanto la sua. Un vero uomo non vi lascer\u00e0 andare a dormire la notte chiedendovi se siete ancora importanti o se avete un posto nella sua vita. Se vi fa piangere pi\u00f9 che ridere, non \u00e8 un uomo da marito. <\/span><\/p>\n

Se \u00e8 il primo a cui correte per avere buone notizie o per parlare della vostra giornata, vi risponder\u00e0 in modo pessimistico, facendovi sentire immeritevoli di sentirvi felici, non \u00e8 un marito adatto.<\/a> Credeteci: Un uomo che vi conduce alla felicit\u00e0, invece di rubarla, vale sempre la pena di aspettare. <\/span><\/p>\n

In una relazione meritate pi\u00f9 del minimo indispensabile. Avere degli standard elevati non significa essere un mantenuto. Decidete di rifiutare di mettervi al di sotto del piedistallo pi\u00f9 alto. Oggi scegliete voi e investite in voi stessi. Domani, scegliete voi e investite in voi stessi. E guardate i profitti moltiplicarsi.<\/span><\/p>\n

di Rachel L. Johnson<\/b><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

This isn\u2019t a letter sugar-coating today\u2019s idea of a relationship. This isn\u2019t a letter trying to convince you to believe in God. This isn\u2019t a letter about feminism nor is it from a feminist perspective. This isn\u2019t a letter meant to place unattainable expectations on today\u2019s men in a relationship. Let\u2019s be honest: This generation\u2019s…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":20,"featured_media":6787,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29625],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6786","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-toxic-relationship"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29625,"label":"toxic relationship"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/10\/eder-oliveira-180877.jpg",800,530,false],"author_info":{"display_name":"Christine Keller","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/author\/christine\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29625,"name":"toxic relationship","slug":"toxic-relationship","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29625,"taxonomy":"category","description":"Are you in a toxic relationship without even knowing it? What should you do if you find yourself in one? Here's all you need to know!","parent":29620,"count":228,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29625,"category_count":228,"category_description":"Are you in a toxic relationship without even knowing it? What should you do if you find yourself in one? Here's all you need to know!","cat_name":"toxic relationship","category_nicename":"toxic-relationship","category_parent":29620}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6786","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/20"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6786"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6786\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/6787"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6786"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6786"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6786"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}