{"id":7969,"date":"2020-04-03T14:21:41","date_gmt":"2020-04-03T14:21:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/herway.net\/?p=7969"},"modified":"2021-08-11T09:22:54","modified_gmt":"2021-08-11T09:22:54","slug":"7-cose-accadono-incontri-bravo-ragazzo-sopravvivere-abuso-emotivo","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/7-cose-accadono-incontri-bravo-ragazzo-sopravvivere-abuso-emotivo\/","title":{"rendered":"7 cose che succedono quando si incontra un bravo ragazzo dopo essere sopravvissuti a un abuso emotivo"},"content":{"rendered":"

Innamorarsi dopo che qualcuno ti ha distrutto in questo modo pu\u00f2 essere una battaglia in salita.<\/p>\n

You really want to love again and you want to open your heart to the one who loves you, but you just can\u2019t.<\/p>\n

You\u2019re too scared that you will go through the same old story again.<\/p>\n

You\u2019re terrified of being dragged into emotional abuse because you know it\u2019s almost impossible to get out.<\/p>\n

You\u2019ve been there and you didn\u2019t even realize what he was doing to you.<\/p>\n

\"donna<\/p>\n

Pensavate che fosse cos\u00ec che doveva essere. Pensavate che le relazioni funzionassero cos\u00ec.<\/p>\n

Pensavate che avesse ragione, dicendo che la colpa di tutto ci\u00f2 che non andava era vostra.<\/p>\n

E tu hai iniziato a crederci davvero. Assorbivate le sue bugie come se fossero le cose pi\u00f9 sincere che qualcuno vi avesse mai detto. <\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

Aveva il potere di farti credere tutto quello che voleva. <\/strong><\/em>It\u2019s not your fault, though. Don\u2019t blame yourself for believing his lies.<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t blame yourself <\/a>per non aver visto prima cosa stava succedendo. Non c'era alcuna possibilit\u00e0 che tu potessi prevederlo.<\/p>\n

\"donna<\/p>\n

Even if you did, even if you knew what was going on, you couldn\u2019t break free that easily.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

Mentivate a voi stessi dicendo che sarebbe cambiato, che era solo una fase.<\/p>\n

E avrebbe avuto ragione, perch\u00e9 ha avuto delle fasi in cui era l'uomo migliore che si potesse desiderare.<\/p>\n

His behavior was hot \u2018n\u2019 cold. He twisted you around his little finger and you responded the way he wanted you to respond. That\u2019s called being a manipulative bastard.<\/p>\n

You couldn\u2019t leave just like that.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

There is something addictive in these relationships. Even though you wanted out, you somehow stayed. It\u2019s like you couldn\u2019t leave him, like something was pulling you back to him.<\/p>\n

\"donna<\/p>\n

Well, it wasn\u2019t love for sure, it was an addiction. You are well aware that if you had left, you would have been alone.<\/p>\n

E in qualche modo contorto, volevi restare con lui perch\u00e9 ti dava sicurezza.<\/p>\n

Avere una relazione con lui era qualcosa che si conosceva, qualcosa di familiare.<\/p>\n

And due to that emotional state he had put you in, you didn\u2019t want to leave for the unknown or leave this relationship.<\/p>\n

La cosa pi\u00f9 importante di tutte \u00e8 che avete avuto paura.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

Avevi paura di lasciarlo<\/a>, you were scared for your life. He threatened you, not just once, and you really didn\u2019t have the courage to take the next step and leave.<\/p>\n

\"donna<\/p>\n

Se dovessi prendere una decisione, preferiresti aver vissuto una relazione abusiva piuttosto che liberarti da una relazione, perch\u00e9 avevi paura di lui e di quello che avrebbe potuto farti.<\/p>\n

But, in the end, he brought you to the point where you didn\u2019t even care for your own life anymore.<\/strong> <\/em><\/p>\n

You didn\u2019t care if you were going to live or die, as long as this suffering was over, so you left.<\/p>\n

In qualche modo avete trovato quel coraggio in pi\u00f9 che avevate nascosto da qualche parte nel profondo di voi stessi e lo avete usato.<\/p>\n

Not because you knew you were strong and you were going to use that strength to escape, but because you didn\u2019t care anymore for anything, not even yourself.<\/p>\n

In questo processo di disinteresse, siete cresciuti. Hai trovato casualmente quella forza, l'hai usata e hai capito che valevi qualcosa.<\/p>\n

\"giovane<\/p>\n

Avete capito di essere forti e di essere in grado di controllare la vostra vita. Now that you\u2019re gone from his abusive grip, you are collecting yourself.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

You\u2019re picking up your broken pieces – not the pieces of your heart, but the pieces of your soul and your mind, too.<\/p>\n

But that doesn\u2019t matter to you so much because you are finally at peace and maybe even ready to love again.<\/p>\n

And loving someone else after what you\u2019ve been through is not an easy game.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

You\u2019ll have to take a lot of challenges and you\u2019ll have to face things which make you shiver, things that you are still afraid of.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

Ti giudichi un po' troppo severamente<\/h2>\n

\"donna<\/p>\n

You have to understand that it\u2019s not your fault for going through all of this. Non si ottiene nulla giudicando se stessi<\/a> and asking yourself why you didn\u2019t escape earlier.<\/p>\n

Spesso le persone ci trattano come trattiamo noi stessi. Quindi, finch\u00e9 vi incolpate di tutto quello che vi \u00e8 successo, la gente se ne accorger\u00e0.<\/p>\n

They will sense that you don\u2019t respect or love yourself and no one will be able to love you back.<\/p>\n

Quando vi trattate male, vi abbandonate. Dovete imparare a non farlo.<\/p>\n

Una volta fatto questo, attirerete altre persone amorevoli e degne di fiducia.<\/p>\n

Devi lasciarlo parlare con te<\/h2>\n

\"donna<\/p>\n

Talking is an essential key to every happy relationship. It\u2019s impossible to develop trust if you don\u2019t talk to each other.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s important to let him know what you\u2019ve been through.<\/p>\n

Let him know you\u2019re still healing and that you\u2019re scared of opening your heart to him – you\u2019re scared of getting hurt again.<\/p>\n

Spiegategli come vi siete sentiti durante la vostra relazione abusiva. Digli che la tua autostima \u00e8 quasi sparita e che hai bisogno di tempo per poterti fidare di chiunque, compreso lui.<\/p>\n

Si ha paura di essere messi in cattiva luce<\/h2>\n

\"donna<\/p>\n

This is something you\u2019ve experienced on a daily basis. He made you believe in things that never happened.<\/p>\n

Ti ha fatto credere di essere pazzo. Questo \u00e8 un classico esempio di manipolazione<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Ora, pensate che la stessa cosa stia accadendo con questo nuovo ragazzo.<\/p>\n

If you\u2019re scared that you are about to experience the same old thing, don\u2019t shut down. Talk to him, explain how you\u2019re feeling.<\/p>\n

Digli cosa ti ha fatto l'ultimo uomo che hai frequentato. Digli come ti ha fatto sentire.<\/p>\n

Tell him you\u2019re scared he is doing the same thing as the last one. Don\u2019t assume you\u2019re being paranoid.<\/p>\n

Respond to your worries and face him. If he shows empathy, and if he listens to your problems, you\u2019ve got nothing to be afraid of.<\/p>\n

Analizzerete troppo le cose<\/h2>\n

\"Donna<\/p>\n

Dubiterete di tutto ci\u00f2 che fa. Vi tratter\u00e0 come meritate e questo sar\u00e0 troppo strano per voi da gestire. Non siete abituati a essere trattati in questo modo.<\/p>\n

Non siete abituati a ricevere un messaggio di buongiorno o dei fiori sul posto di lavoro. Non siete abituati a ricevere una visita a sorpresa solo per controllare come state.<\/p>\n

You\u2019ll probably think he\u2019s smothering you or that he\u2019s being too pushy and you\u2019re going to back down and shut him out to analyze why he is doing all of these things for you.<\/p>\n

Is he trying to lure you into his trap only to show his real face later on? You\u2019ll have a ton of questions like this, but stay focused.<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t let your bad experience ruin your chance for happiness.<\/p>\n

Vi scusate sempre<\/h2>\n

\"coppia<\/p>\n

\u00c8 stato colui che ti ha fatto da gaslight a insegnarti a farlo. Ti ha trasformato in un piccolo e perfetto burattino obbediente. Tutto era colpa tua e dovevi ammetterlo.<\/p>\n

You had to admit you were the one to blame or all hell would break loose. So, you apologized for things you did and didn\u2019t do to protect yourself.<\/p>\n

You\u2019re doing the same thing all over again, but this time you don\u2019t have to do it. He doesn\u2019t want you to apologize all the time.<\/p>\n

He is telling you it\u2019s not your fault and that it\u2019s okay.<\/p>\n

You can\u2019t accept he\u2019s real<\/h2>\n

\"bella<\/p>\n

You think he\u2019s too good to be true. You are afraid that he is putting on a show only to impress you and gain your trust.<\/p>\n

Avete paura che, una volta mostrata la via del vostro cuore, lui getti la maschera e riveli il suo vero volto.<\/p>\n

You can\u2019t shake the feeling that something bad is going to happen any minute now.<\/p>\n

Si ha la sensazione di vivere in una favola <\/a>perch\u00e9 non avreste mai potuto nemmeno sognare di essere trattati e amati in questo modo.<\/p>\n

And you know what, you are living in a fairy tale. You finally got your happy ending. Don\u2019t feel guilty though because you deserved one.<\/p>\n

Lasciate che i nuovi sentimenti prendano il sopravvento<\/h2>\n

\"donna<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t fight these strange, new feelings that are consuming you. Embrace them, because they are something you\u2019ll be feeling for the rest of your life.<\/p>\n

Questo \u00e8 l'aspetto del vero amore. \u00c8 cos\u00ec che ci si sente.<\/p>\n

Lasciati andare. Lasciate che vi ami perch\u00e9 ve lo meritate.<\/p>\n

\"7<\/p>\n

\"7<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Falling in love after someone destroyed you like this can be an uphill battle. You really want to love again and you want to open your heart to the one who loves you, but you just can\u2019t. You\u2019re too scared that you will go through the same old story again. You\u2019re terrified of being dragged…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":21,"featured_media":81200,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29632],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-7969","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-abuse-and-trauma"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29632,"label":"abuse & trauma"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/7-Things-That-Happen-When-You-Meet-A-Good-Guy-After-Surviving-An-Emotional-Abuse.jpg",800,534,false],"author_info":{"display_name":"Maria Parker","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/author\/maria\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29632,"name":"abuse & trauma","slug":"abuse-and-trauma","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29632,"taxonomy":"category","description":"Learn the signs of emotional and physical abuse and how to protect yourself from toxic patterns in relationships with your partner, friends or family.","parent":22911,"count":138,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29632,"category_count":138,"category_description":"Learn the signs of emotional and physical abuse and how to protect yourself from toxic patterns in relationships with your partner, friends or family.","cat_name":"abuse & trauma","category_nicename":"abuse-and-trauma","category_parent":22911}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7969","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/21"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7969"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7969\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/81200"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7969"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7969"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7969"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}