{"id":87636,"date":"2020-08-14T07:49:19","date_gmt":"2020-08-14T07:49:19","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/herway.net\/?p=87636"},"modified":"2021-08-11T12:55:54","modified_gmt":"2021-08-11T12:55:54","slug":"ragazza-sopravvissuta-al-gaslighting","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/ragazza-sopravvissuta-al-gaslighting\/","title":{"rendered":"Lettera di una ragazza che \u00e8 sopravvissuta all'illuminazione a gas"},"content":{"rendered":"

Vi siete mai trovati in una situazione in cui non credete a voi stessi? In una situazione in cui mettete in dubbio i vostri pensieri?<\/p>\n

Have you ever caught yourself doubting your own sanity? Caught yourself wondering whether you\u2019re seeing things right or if you\u2019re imagining things?<\/p>\n

I really hope you haven\u2019t. Because I have and I wouldn\u2019t wish it on my worst enemy.<\/p>\n

Reading this, you must think that I\u2019ve been fighting some problemi mentali<\/a>. After all, that\u2019s what it sounds like at first, doesn\u2019t it?<\/p>\n

Well, the truth is that I eventually started having trouble with my mental health. However, that wasn\u2019t my initial problem.<\/p>\n

The truth is that I was gaslighted for years. Of course, I wasn\u2019t aware of this at first, otherwise I would have probably escaped sooner.<\/strong><\/p>\n

You see, my gaslighter didn\u2019t start his emotional abuse at maximum intensity right from the beginning. In fact, these kinds of toxic men have a way of getting under your skin.<\/p>\n

\"donna<\/p>\n

Quando ho incontrato per la prima volta il mio abusatore, sembrava troppo bello per essere vero. E io, stupida, ho creduto a tutte le sue false pretese.<\/p>\n

Mi sono fidato di tutti i suoi promesse vuote<\/a> \u2013 probably because I wanted them to be true. Besides, opening up to him was a piece of cake.<\/p>\n

He was the nicest guy I\u2019d ever met. He appeared to be the realization of all of my wildest dreams and I was certain he was the man I would spend the rest of my life with.<\/p>\n

Tuttavia, tutto questo era la maschera di un bravo ragazzo. Non era altro che il prequel di anni di manipolazioni e giochi con la mia mente.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Non era altro che il prequel del mio inferno in terra.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Vedete, tutto \u00e8 iniziato con piccole cose. Every time we fought, he would do his best to convince me that I\u2019d misinterpreted something or that I was overreacting.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Continuava a dire che ero troppo sensibile e mi accusava di averlo frainteso.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Con il passare del tempo, ha iniziato a stravolgere completamente gli eventi. He didn\u2019t actually lie but instead used half-truths and twisted them to suit him.<\/strong><\/p>\n

At that time, I didn\u2019t even know what gaslighting was. I thought that the two of us just had different views of the truth.<\/p>\n

I didn\u2019t think of him as a bad person for doing all of this either. I just figured that every coin has two sides and that he was simply trying to tell his part of the story.<\/p>\n

\"mangaslighting<\/p>\n

Tuttavia, prima che me ne accorgessi, I\u2019d been brainwashed. Soon enough, I trusted him more than I trusted my own eyes and ears.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Secondo quest'uomo, ero io la pazza. Ero una pazza che continuava a esagerare e a inventare cose.<\/p>\n

Secondo lui, io ero un buono a nulla, mentre lui era quello pi\u00f9 intelligente e quello che sapeva sempre la verit\u00e0.<\/p>\n

Cos\u00ec, dopo un po' di tempo, Ho iniziato a mettere in dubbio la mia realt\u00e0. Utilizzava diverse tattiche per confondermi e per sommergermi di dubbi su se stessi<\/a>.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Le parti peggiori erano quando continuava a negare le cose che sapevo essere accadute. Dopo tutto, ero uno dei protagonisti di quegli eventi.<\/p>\n

However, despite that, he would look me straight in the eyes and act like I was dreaming everything. Every time I mentioned some of his toxic actions, he convinced me that I\u2019d got it all wrong.<\/p>\n

In realt\u00e0 \u00e8 stato quello che mi ha fatto pi\u00f9 male. Immaginate qualcuno che vi spezza il cuore e poi si rifiuta di riconoscere il vostro dolore e non si assume alcuna responsabilit\u00e0 per le sue azioni.<\/strong><\/p>\n

To someone who hasn\u2019t had this experience, all of this probably sounds impossible. You must be thinking: \u201cHow can someone change your memory and distort your picture of reality?\u201d<\/p>\n

Well, let me tell you that it is, in fact, more than possible. It doesn\u2019t happen overnight but when your loved one puts all of his efforts into manipulating you, eventually he succeeds in doing so.<\/p>\n

Quando la persona amata ha come priorit\u00e0 quella di distruggere sistematicamente la vostra salute mentale e di farvi costantemente il lavaggio del cervello, alla fine rinunciate a lottare e cadete nella sua trappola.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Questo \u00e8 esattamente ci\u00f2 che ho fatto: Ho iniziato a credergli perch\u00e9 era l'unico modo per proteggermi.<\/strong> S\u00ec, in teoria avrei potuto lasciarlo.<\/p>\n

However, in practice, that was utterly impossible. This man made me feel so powerless and made me so emotionally dependent on him that I didn\u2019t see a way out.<\/p>\n

Di fatto, l'accettazione \u00e8 diventata il mio meccanismo di difesa. \u00c8 diventato pi\u00f9 facile per me credere che avesse sempre ragione piuttosto che combattere con lui e con me stessa.<\/p>\n

You must be wondering how I got away from all of this. Clearly I did save myself from him, otherwise I wouldn\u2019t be writing all of this and I wouldn\u2019t be aware that I had been a victim of gaslighting.<\/p>\n

Beh, mi ci \u00e8 voluto molto pi\u00f9 tempo per salvarmi di quanto mi piaccia ammettere. Per fortuna avevo accanto i miei cari.<\/p>\n

I had people who gave me confirmation. Validation that I wasn\u2019t crazy and that showed me that my toxic ex\u2019s denials can\u2019t magically erase the past.<\/p>\n

After a long struggle, I managed to get out of it alive. I\u2019m changed forever but most importantly, I\u2019m alive.<\/strong><\/p>\n

No, I\u2019m not talking about the struggles I had with this man. I\u2019m talking about my inner struggles.<\/strong><\/p>\n

\"donna<\/p>\n

Prego che non vi troviate mai in una situazione in cui dovete lottare contro voi stessi per iniziare a credere a voi stessi.<\/strong> Sembra assurdo, lo so.<\/p>\n

Tuttavia, questo \u00e8 esattamente ci\u00f2 che accadeva nella mia testa. Ho avuto alcuni profondi problemi di fiducia<\/a> con me stessa che dovevo sconfiggere prima di trovare la forza di lasciare la mia relazione tossica.<\/strong><\/p>\n

In fin dei conti, sono sopravvissuto contro ogni previsione. Tuttavia, niente e nessuno potr\u00e0 restituirmi gli anni perduti.<\/p>\n

Niente e nessuno pu\u00f2 ripagarmi di tutte le mie lacrime e di tutte le notti passate a riavvolgere il passato e a cercare tutte le risposte di cui avevo bisogno.<\/p>\n

So, if you\u2019re reading this and any of the things mentioned above sound familiar, I have just one thing to tell you: always trust yourself.<\/p>\n

Follow your gut and your instincts. Don\u2019t listen to anyone except that tiny voice in the back of your head, telling you to run for your life.<\/strong><\/p>\n

\"La<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Have you ever been in a position where you don\u2019t believe yourself? In a situation where you question your own thoughts? Have you ever caught yourself doubting your own sanity? Caught yourself wondering whether you\u2019re seeing things right or if you\u2019re imagining things? I really hope you haven\u2019t. Because I have and I wouldn\u2019t wish…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":21,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29632],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-87636","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-abuse-and-trauma"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29632,"label":"abuse & trauma"}]},"featured_image_src_large":false,"author_info":{"display_name":"Maria Parker","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/author\/maria\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29632,"name":"abuse & trauma","slug":"abuse-and-trauma","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29632,"taxonomy":"category","description":"Learn the signs of emotional and physical abuse and how to protect yourself from toxic patterns in relationships with your partner, friends or family.","parent":22911,"count":138,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29632,"category_count":138,"category_description":"Learn the signs of emotional and physical abuse and how to protect yourself from toxic patterns in relationships with your partner, friends or family.","cat_name":"abuse & trauma","category_nicename":"abuse-and-trauma","category_parent":22911}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/87636","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/21"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=87636"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/87636\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=87636"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=87636"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/it\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=87636"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}