It’s hard to think about the New Year, let alone make New Year’s resolutions, when you have a broken heart to deal with. I know because I am dealing with it. So I did the only thing I could do—I decided I won’t let it get the best of me and started working on some resolutions of my own.

Cynics will say ‘New Year—new me’ is just something people say and never do; that those are all just lies we say to ourselves and that our problems will be the same when the year passes. I don’t agree. I will try to prove them wrong.

I believe everything is as you make it. New Year is a perfect way to have a fresh start. I believe it can really give you a clean slate if you really want a change.

I’ve been through a tough break-up recently. It drained me physically and emotionally. It was bad. Tears roll down my face only thinking of it. But I decided to be stronger than all of it. I decided to be stronger than me. I decided that this New Year be better for me. It will give me a new beginning because I will start by believing in myself and that I can make it through anything. That’s more than enough to go with.

I started by making a list of New Year’s resolutions. Things I will and won’t do. Even though I know it all deep down, somehow it’s easier when you see it all on paper.

1. I will love myself more.

All the energy and love I invested in my past relationship I will now invest in myself. He made me feel unlovable. He made me forget my worth—it’s time I remember it again.

2. There’s always some good in goodbye

I will stop deluding myself. That relationship was toxic and there was no other way but out of it. I have to realize the difference between missing somebody and needing them in my life. This break-up was probably the best thing that could have happened to me. This ended relationship can only lead me to something better.

3. I will stop giving people chances to hurt me again.

I learned a lot. But, first and foremost I learned that I have to stop giving second or numerous chances to people that are not worthy of them. It just gives them a new opportunity to hurt me again. I learned that nobody is worth my tears. I learned that I am stronger than I think and that it’s time I am my own hero.

4. I will forgive and forget.

All this pain has made me into this bitter and sad person I no longer recognize. I won’t let it burden me and weigh me down. I am so much more than my pain. I will forgive all the bad things he has done and that will make getting over him so much easier.

5. I won’t be impatient. I will wait for somebody better to come along.

I won’t let my loneliness get the best of me. It will only lead me to the hands of somebody who is similar to my ex. I was in a relationship and I felt so alone. I don’t want that happening again. I will wait for somebody who knows how to love; somebody who will appreciate me. I won’t settle.

 

Woman watching the sunrise

6. I will remember to take as much as I give.

I am used to giving all my love, time and energy to someone who could never reciprocate me the same way. Now it’s time for somebody capable of that. It’s time to give a chance to someone who can be there for me and who can make me happy.

7. I will take it slow.

I am scared to get hurt again, so whenever I think about the new relationship, I would like someone who will be ready to commit soon because I feel like that’s only way I will feel safe. But, I have to be realistic—good things take time, so I won’t get ahead of myself. I will take things one step at the time.

8. I will rely on my instinct.

I never again want to be blindsided. I don’t want to ignore my gut and then suffer the consequences. When something feels off, it probably is. I have to trust myself more and get to the bottom of things.

9. I will let go of things that weren’t meant to be more easily.

I won’t hold on and hope things will work out for the better. I will stop projecting fantasies of what could have been and face what is. I’ll stop wanting forever from temporary people. What’s meant for me will always find its way what’s not will never be. And that’s how things are supposed to be.

10. I will work on myself for myself.

The first person I have to make happy is me. I will invest in myself the way I used to invest in him and even more so. It will make my life better. I will make myself proud every single day of next year. It will be amazing because I will try my best to make it like that.