When someone you love more than anything in this world vanishes from your life, you feel like you’ll never recover. You feel like you want to die because your existence has no meaning anymore.
This is exactly how you felt when your ex walked away from you. This was the man you wanted to grow old with, someone you planned your future with and the man who you thought was your forever person.
When he left you hanging, all of your dreams and hopes collapsed. You couldn’t believe what was happening to you or if you’d ever manage to get over this guy. The worst part is that you still don’t have a clue how you’ll continue living your life without him.
This man crushed your heart but he did something even worse than that—he broke you into thousands of pieces. Ever since he abandoned you, you feel incomplete and like a part of you is missing.
You feel like you’ll never recover and as if your wounded heart will never heal. Well, let me tell you it will.
I know this sounds like mission impossible right now but trust me on this one; before you know it, you’ll find a way to put the pieces of your broken heart back together. Before you know it, you will learn to live without this man by your side and you will find a way to repair all the damage he’s caused.
Nevertheless, this won’t happen overnight. Glueing yourself back together after a devastating heartbreak and going back to being your old self is a process which takes time, patience and devotion.
However, your path to recovery can’t start unless you embrace your pain, without allowing it to define you. In order to rebuild yourself, you need to let yourself fall apart completely.
You need to understand that you went through a painful emotional trauma and that repressing your feelings will only make things worse. So instead of doing that, allow yourself to grieve.
No, you are not weak for feeling like this. You are just a human being who’s been through a lot and who needs time to heal.
Don’t act like you don’t miss this guy because missing someone who was a huge part of your life is completely natural. Don’t act like he never existed and don’t lie to yourself that you are completely over him because pretending that you don’t feel something won’t make it disappear.
Nonetheless, this doesn’t mean that it is OK to contact him in any way because that would be desperate. Miss him as much as you want but don’t even think of going back to him.
After the initial grieving phase is over, it is time to keep your mind busy so it doesn’t have the energy to think about your heartbreak. Time to focus all of your efforts on yourself and on making yourself happy.
This is the time in which you need to remind yourself about the things you enjoy doing that are not connected to your asshole ex. To do everything you’ve wanted to do for a while but never had a chance to, to completely embrace your single life and to start enjoying the fact that you no longer have to compromise on anything.
I won’t lie to you—you’ll still suffer over this man. But with each day that passes, your suffering will slowly disappear.
With each day, without even being aware of it, you’ll think of him less and less and he’ll keep on fading in your memory more and more. With each day that comes, you’ll be picking up your broken self step by step, without even knowing it.
And then one morning, you’ll see that he isn’t the first thought that comes to your mind. You’ll see that you haven’t cried over this man for ages and that feeling like you are dying from the inside is gone.
Just like that—you’ll see everything more clearly. You’ll stop romanticizing your past with this man and you’ll stop idealizing him. For the first time ever, you’ll see this guy for who he really is. You’ll see that him leaving you was actually a blessing and the best thing that could have happened to you. Most importantly, you’ll see that you’ve managed to unlove him.
A teacher. A dreamer. A writer. A woman who’s been through all of the things you are going through. A woman who’s learned on her mistakes and whose advice you can trust. A woman who is trying to find her place under the stars. A woman just like you.