When you see a woman who looks like she doesn’t have a care on her mind, you admire her strength. You admire how she manages to always remain positive and how she never allows anything or anyone to break her.
When you see a strong woman, you admire her for the fact that she always manages to rise from everything that is bringing her down. You are impressed by how she always gets up and picks up the pieces of herself, without anyone’s help. You admire her for always having a huge smile on her face and for not letting anyone affect her.
But the truth is quite different because no one knows the amount of pain she hides behind that smile. Yes, she has a strong soul, but sometimes, this brings her more bad than good.
The fact is that this strong soul of hers is the reason she hides the fact that she is bleeding from the inside. It is the reason she hides her deep emotional scars from the world, and the reason she refuses to share her pain with anyone.
But the real truth is that this girl is suffering more than anyone. She just does it in silence. She doesn’t go around telling everyone that her heart is broken. She never cries in public, and she never complains.
But when she is alone, she is falling apart. She fights her inner battles silently and makes sure no one notices it. She hides a ton of pain behind her smile, while she is convincing everyone, including herself, that everything is OK.
When you meet her, you could never guess that this girl spent an entire night crying herself to sleep. You could never imagine that some asshole broke her heart and changed her for good. You could never guess everything she’s been through.
The truth is that this girl is keeping all of her pain for herself because she is afraid of appearing too weak and pathetic. She is afraid that people will take advantage of her vulnerable side if she shows it to them. She is afraid that people will use her if she lets them in.
This girl is afraid of being judged and ridiculed for her pain. She doesn’t want the ones who have hurt her to have the satisfaction of seeing how she breaks apart.
And most importantly, she keeps her feelings bottled up because this is the only way for her to have control over them. It is the only way in which she can be in charge, and the only way in which she can act as if that the pain doesn’t exist.
Because the moment she shares it with the world, the pain becomes more real. And there is no turning back after that.
That is why she decided to build thick walls around her soul. That is why she decided to wear an armor of steel around her heart and to put a fake smile on her face. Because it is easier for her that way.
What she doesn’t know is that hiding the fact that she is suffering won’t make it disappear. Pretending the pain doesn’t exist won’t make it go away.
Instead, it will only pile up inside of her. It will grow out of proportion and out of control. And eventually, it will make her become completely numb, and it will make her lose herself.
What she doesn’t know is that she is allowed to be hurt. She is allowed to cry her heart out if she feels like it.
She is allowed to admit that someone caused her pain, and she is allowed to be heartbroken. And none of this makes her any less of a strong woman than she is.
What she doesn’t know is that she deserves to have someone she can share her deepest fears and worries with. That she deserves to have a shoulder to cry on and someone to understand her and to be there for her.
What she doesn’t know is that she is allowed to feel and that she should never be ashamed of her emotions. Because after all, she is only human.
A teacher. A dreamer. A writer. A woman who’s been through all of the things you are going through. A woman who’s learned on her mistakes and whose advice you can trust. A woman who is trying to find her place under the stars. A woman just like you.