Every failed relationship and heartbreak changes you in a way. But this change is never as strong as it is when you get your heart broken for the first time.
When you have to deal with your first heartbreak, your entire world collapses. Because ever since you can remember, you had some attitudes and opinions about love and relationships.
But now, you find yourself in a situation in which you have to question everything you believed in about love. All of this makes some important differences to your life and here are 5 of them.
1. You realize that sometimes love is not enough
Remember when you were a little girl and you thought that love was this omnipotent force which could defeat everyone and everything and could never be defeated?
Remember how you always waited for your Prince Charming and for your happily ever after guy?
Remember how you thought it was more than enough for two people to love each other for them to be happy?
Well, your first heartbreak bursts your bubble and shows you that sometimes love is simply not enough, as much as you want it to be.
It teaches you that sometimes people are simply not meant to be and that sometimes things don’t work out, as much as you wanted them to.
Don’t get me wrong—I am not saying that you permanently stop believing in love when you go through your first heartbreak.
Yes, this usually happens at first. But as soon as the anger passes you by, you realize that there will be much more love in your life.
But you also understand that there are some other things needed besides love for you to be happy.
2. You become more careful when it comes to men
The next thing that happens after your first heartbreak is that you become more careful when it comes to men.
This is when you realize there are some men who only want to use you, some who just want to get in your pants and some who will deliberately cause you emotional pain.
You realize that not all men tell the truth. You realize that there exist players and fuckboys who will only bring trouble into your life.
I am not saying that you should think that all men are the same. But you definitely become more careful before involving yourself with someone and before letting someone new into your life.
3. You stop believing everyone
Before you get your heart broken for the first time, you look at the world from your own viewpoint.
You think that people are generally good and kind and that you can trust whoever comes your way.
But besides losing your trust in men, you lose your trust in people in general, after your first heartbreak.
You understand that not all people mean you well and you learn that everyone should earn your trust before you open up to them completely.
Although this is not a bad thing, you need to be careful not to become too bitter or too negative.
Remember, there is nothing wrong with putting walls up around yourself, which will keep all the wrong people out. But you also need to leave a little space for the right ones.
4. Your view on love and relationships changes
After you experience your first heartbreak, you start observing love and relationships a little bit differently.
You see that things are rarely black and white. You see that there exist many more emotions besides pure love, pure hatred and complete indifference.
But most of all—you decide never to give yourself to another man in the way you did to your ex who hurt you.
I am not saying that you will never love some other guy the way you loved this one. I am just saying that you always learn to keep a small part of yourself only to yourself.
5. You become stronger
Although having your heart broken is awful and painful, the truth is that it also has some good points.
Before you got your heart broken, you were a person who was easily annoyed and hurt. But that has changed.
Now, you see that you can put up with a lot.
You see that you can handle a lot and that you can survive some things which you thought would definitely break you. And you see how strong and powerful you actually are.
A teacher. A dreamer. A writer. A woman who’s been through all of the things you are going through. A woman who’s learned on her mistakes and whose advice you can trust. A woman who is trying to find her place under the stars. A woman just like you.