A lot of girls rush into a relationship and end up hurt and alone. In order to avoid that, you should check if he’s actually worth your time. There are some signs at the beginning that you could miss but are obviously saying that he’s not the right guy for you. Maybe you can’t see those signs because you’re blinded by the love you feel. So, you should take some time and get it together in order to realize who he really is. Try neglecting your feelings for a second and look at him completely objectively. Look at him through someone else’s eyes. Imagine what kind of characteristics your dream guy should have. When you define them, see if the guy you’re in love with has any of them.
Don’t settle for less than you want or deserve. Don’t even lose time on that. You should be aware of your qualities and wishes and strong enough to say ‘no’ to anything that doesn’t bring you happiness. Finding someone who is worth your time takes too much energy. But it’s better to lose that energy on waiting for him than to lose it on someone who is not worth it at all. It’s better to be alone, than with someone who is not worth it.
Besides comparing him with your dream guy, here are some questions you should also find the answers to:
1. Is he in love with me?
This is the most important question. If the answer is no, you should dump him as soon as possible. No matter what he says, it’s how you feel. If you feel like he’s not in love with you, then don’t waste your time on him. His words could be the best and the sweetest. He could be saying that he loves you every day. But if that’s not what he’s showing you, then his words are nothing but lies. He should make you feel loved all the time, even when he’s not around. If it’s love, then you’ll be able to feel it all the time. But if it’s not, then you know what you need to do.
2. What made me fall in love with him?
If you’re convinced that he’s truly in love with you, then it’s time to reflect on your own feelings. Why are you with him? What made you fall for him? What are the qualities he has that appeal to you the most? Maybe those qualities are the same as what you want to see on your dream guy. And maybe they’re something completely different from what you had in mind. If they’re different, it’s okay. Maybe you’re changing your taste in men a bit. Or, maybe you feel like you need someone with those qualities in your life right now. It’s all good unless those qualities are worse than what you’re looking for. Don’t ever settle for less! Don’t let your heart decide on everything. Sure, love is the most important thing but it’s not enough.
3. How do I feel when I’m with him?
Our feelings are very tricky. They can be extremely deceiving. You can feel like you’re on cloud nine while you’re with your boyfriend but you’re actually not that happy. When you’re in love, everything looks so perfect and dreamy. So when you’re with him you might be feeling like the happiest person in the whole world but that feeling passes the moment you get home. That happens because he’s not next to you anymore. And then you feel like you can only be happy when you’re with him. It’s okay, you need to be happy when you’re with him, but that happiness shouldn’t be temporary. When you’re with him, you should be feeling loved, respected, and like you’re the only girl in the world. And then when you get home, you’ll feel happy all the time because he makes you feel like that. It’s easy to be happy when you’re blinded by love but it’s more important to be happy when you feel truly loved.
4. Does he support and respect me?
This question is as simple as the first one. If he doesn’t support and respect you, leave him. It doesn’t matter how much he loves you if he’s not ready to be there for you. If he respects your wishes, obligations and time, then he might be a keeper.
5. Is he proud to be with me?
Does he always tell you how lucky he is to have you in his life? Does he show you off? Does he support you in your career? Does he push you to be the best version of yourself that you can be? He does? Damn, you lucky girl. Don’t let him go. But if he doesn’t, don’t waste one more second on him. If he’s not proud of you, he’s definitely not the guy you should be with.
6. Does he make time for me?
If he loves, respects, and supports you and is proud of you, then he has to make time for you. There’s nothing a guy wouldn’t do for a girl he cared that much about. In case he makes time for you, to surprise you, take you on a trip, or even make you dinner, then you’re lucky. He might be everything you need in your life.
7. Do I see my future with him?
Can you imagine waking up to him every day for the rest of your life? Can you imagine sharing a house with him? Can you imagine raising children together? Can you imagine peaceful nights with him, watching your favorite movies? You can? Honey, then he’s the one. There’s nothing to worry about.