Let’s face it—we all want to find love at one point in our life, one way or another.

Even if you enjoy your single life at this point, your final goal is probably to find someone who will love you and whom you will love.

And when you think about love, you are probably thinking of something more permanent. You hope to find someone who will stay by your side until the end of time.

You probably want someone to be your forever person, a man you’ll grow old with, a man who will be with you even when your face gets covered in wrinkles.

You want someone to hold your hand through thick and thin and someone you can always count on. Whenever you are starting a new relationship, you hope that this time this is it.

That this will be your person, that you’ve finally found someone who will never abandon you. Someone who will not just be your lover but who will also become your best friend and family.

You are hoping you’ve found your happily ever after.

But you see, I’m quite different. Because this is the last thing I’m looking for.

In the past, I was just like you. I wasn’t ready to settle for one-night stands, casual flings or affairs.

I was a girl who wanted all or nothing. If I happened to cross paths with a guy who wasn’t able to meet my standards and deal-breakers, I would immediately pass on him.

I’m not saying I was too picky when it came to men.

No, I just knew very well what I wanted and I wasn’t ready to settle for anything less. And I definitely wasn’t ready to waste my time on someone I couldn’t have a future with.

The point is that I was only interested in a romance which had the potential of lasting a lifetime.

But life has taught me differently. My heartbreaks and disappointments taught me that there is no such thing as forever.

Life has taught me that forever and a happily ever after are just fairy tales we believed in as children. Life has taught me that forever doesn’t last.

And that is why I stopped looking for forever a long time ago. That is why I stopped worrying about the future and about what will happen tomorrow.

That is why I learned to live in the moment and why I taught myself to enjoy the present, without thinking of anything else.

And that is why I’m asking you to love me now, at this exact moment.

Don’t get me wrong—I am not telling you that I am ready to settle for a relationship with no strings attached or that I would settle for you not putting in any effort.

I am just asking you to concentrate on today.

The last thing I need is your false promises. The last thing I need is you promising me the world and ending up giving me nothing.

The last thing I need is you getting my hopes up and then ending up disappointing me, like every other guy from my past did.

The last thing I need is you raising me up to the stars and me ending up falling hard to the ground.

So please, the only thing I’m asking from you is to be honest with both of us. Not to sweet talk me into anything and not to try to undermine my intelligence.

Because trust me—it will not work out.

So instead of giving me a bunch of false promises that you yourself don’t know if you can fulfill, focus on being the best possible boyfriend right now.

Instead of planning on making me happy in the future, focus on making me happy now.

Instead of thinking about how things will turn out and what will happen with us in the future, focus on making every present day special and worth living.

Instead of telling me fairy tales which will never come true, focus on your actions today. Instead of promising me that you’ll love me in the future, love me at this exact moment.

Trust me—this will be more than enough for me.

Selma June
I am an English Language and Literature teacher. I am a writer. I am a daughter, a sister, a friend... But most of all, I am a woman, just like you. A woman who has experienced the same things you’ve been going through. A woman who’s been fighting battles similar to yours. A woman who wants you to learn from her mistakes and who wants to help you empower yourself.
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