Dear Bestie,

You’re my soulmate. You’re my person to lean on. You’re my person to go to, and I am writing this because it tears my heart to see your pretty face in tears all the time.

Your (ex) boyfriend changed you into a person you are not. You were vibrant and full of life. But when you are with him, you become someone else. He pulls you into that deep pit full of misery when he should be the person that makes you happy.

You finally made peace with yourself. You learned how to live without him. Your face brightened up again. You started to rebuild your life.

Then, he reaches out to you again. He sends message after message. Or if he tries really hard, he creates an essay with his constant texting. He calls. He sends voice messages. Anything to win your attention over again.

Can you count the times this same scenario happened?

He is repeating his behavior, and you are repeating your behavior.  And you became a part of this enchanted circle. You just don’t seem to get out of it.

Now, you are there again. Firstly, trying your best not to answer those messages. Scared as hell that you are going to fall under his charms. You are feeling lonely, and he will make you feel needed. He will make you feel sorry for him. He will make you think that you are the only one who can understand him—the only one he can rely on.

Sorry, but I have to say it—this is not the first time, and we both know how this will end: with your already broken heart broken once again. If you go back to him, nothing will change. Don’t make excuses for him. Don’t trust his lies. He will put you through hell once again.

See also: 9 Things To Do Instead Of Falling Back In Love

I know you love him and when you think about him, you only think about those happy moments. This time, try remembering the bad ones. Remember all the times he made you feel worthless. Remember those never-ending fights. Remember that other woman. Remember her the best.

Don’t let him tell you stories. Just remember his actions. Just remember he showed his love when he was in bed with her.

I know you know everything. I know emotions are not easy to ignore. I know it’s hard. I know you love him in spite of everything.

But he has to love you just the same. He has to show his love to you. He had so many opportunities to do that, and he didn’t use them.

He will just bring you more heartache.

Please resist that temptation. He will hurt you again I am sure. And you know I only want what’s best for you. I would hate to see you heartbroken again.

See also: Nothing You Do Can Bring Me Back

Be strong. And remember: I will be there for you no matter what.

With love.

Your soulmate.