{"id":127536,"date":"2021-03-19T17:37:30","date_gmt":"2021-03-19T17:37:30","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/herway.net\/?p=127536"},"modified":"2022-02-04T11:58:10","modified_gmt":"2022-02-04T11:58:10","slug":"porque-e-que-os-fantasmas-voltam-sempre","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/porque-e-que-os-fantasmas-voltam-sempre\/","title":{"rendered":"Porque \u00e9 que os fantasmas voltam sempre e como lidar com os seus regressos"},"content":{"rendered":"

Ser fantasma de algu\u00e9m<\/a> A morte de algu\u00e9m que amamos ou de quem gostamos \u00e9 uma experi\u00eancia terrivelmente dolorosa, mas o pior \u00e9 que esses fantasmas tendem a regressar \u00e0s nossas vidas do nada. Porqu\u00ea? Porque \u00e9 que os fantasmas voltam sempre para as suas v\u00edtimas?<\/p>\n

Is it because they have regrets for everything they’ve done, or is it simply because they feel lonely and want to have some more fun? Unfortunately, in most cases, it’s the latter.<\/em><\/p>\n

I\u2019ve always wondered why ghosters do that. What the actual purpose of ghosting is… I looked into this phenomenon, and my research led me to the following conclusions.<\/p>\n

Ghosters are narcissists in disguise who simply don’t care for others\u2019 feelings. <\/strong><\/p>\n

They’re also cowards who don’t have the guts to face their problems, and they prefer to sweep them under the rug or simply run away from them.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Their most significant trait is their indecisiveness which doesn’t allow them to have and maintain a serious relationship with another human being. They simply don’t know what they want.<\/p>\n

Porque \u00e9 que os fantasmas voltam sempre: 11 raz\u00f5es comuns<\/h2>\n

If this is the first time your ghost has come back, it’s perfectly normal that you’re riding an emotional rollercoaster right now.<\/em><\/p>\n

You couldn’t understand why they left the way they did, and now you simply can’t understand why they came back after everything.<\/p>\n

It’s all too confusing and messed up, I know. Actually, that’s exactly how these kinds of people are; truly messed up.<\/p>\n

Below is a list of some common reasons why ghosters always come back, and I hope it’ll help you realize why your ghost reappeared.<\/p>\n

They’re simply bored and lonely<\/h3>\n

\"homem<\/p>\n

Esta \u00e9, portanto, a raz\u00e3o mais comum pela qual os fantasmas voltam sempre. Desaparecem quando se aborrecem de si e reaparecem quando come\u00e7am a sentir-se s\u00f3s.<\/em><\/p>\n

That’s a sick game to play with a person who has romantic feelings for them. Also, that’s exactly why they never want to end things with that person in the “right way.”<\/p>\n

The thing is that a person who was ghosting you for an amount of time never had any sincere feelings for you in the first place. You’re simply a toy to them, a toy they think they can always take and play with.<\/p>\n

They think you’ll always welcome them back<\/h3>\n

\"mulher<\/p>\n

It’s not always so great to be a nice person. People see you as a toy then can play, have fun with, and ditch whenever they get bored.<\/p>\n

There are some very cruel people who’ll take advantage of your kindness and hurt you in the most painful ways.<\/p>\n

The truth is, our ghosts from the past are one of those people. Just because you’re always nice to them, they see it as a chance to treat you any way they want because they simply think that the door to your life will always be open to them.<\/p>\n

Se continuar a dar-lhes segundas oportunidades<\/a> and if you let them go in and out of your life whenever they want, it’ll simply give them the right to keep breaking your heart, piece by piece.<\/p>\n

Precisam de um impulso no ego<\/h3>\n

\"homem<\/p>\n

O teu fantasma continua a voltar para ti porque you’re their ego boost<\/a>. They\u2019ve probably experienced disappointments in their dating life, and they\u2019ve come back to you to feed their ego.<\/p>\n

So, basically, you’re only food for their fragile ego. They’re breadcrumbing you because they simply need you to help them build and maintain their confidence.<\/strong><\/p>\n

The thing is that if you let them keep ghosting and reappearing in your life, you’ll lose your confidence. That’s the worst feeling because it’ll lead you to lose yourself and your identity by the time they\u2019re done with you.<\/p>\n

Before you even notice it, you’ll go into hiding from yourself and lose touch with real life and other people. You’ll also be left unable to build and maintain a healthy, serious relationship with another person.<\/p>\n

Eles querem provar que podem ter-te sempre que quiserem<\/h3>\n

\"homem<\/p>\n

Por muito que precisem de si para aumentar o seu ego, tamb\u00e9m o querem usar para provar a si e ao resto do mundo que o podem ter sempre que quiserem.<\/p>\n

Last year I met a nice guy and very soon, we became friends. We talked about our dating lives, and he admitted to me that he was ghosting his ex-girlfriend and that it wasn\u2019t the first time he was doing it.<\/p>\n

Ele deixava-a sem saber o que fazer durante v\u00e1rias semanas, mas acabava sempre por voltar para ela. Simplesmente regressava e, no dia seguinte, reiniciavam a rela\u00e7\u00e3o como se nada tivesse acontecido.<\/p>\n

Fiquei realmente fascinada com a rela\u00e7\u00e3o deles e com toda aquela situa\u00e7\u00e3o.<\/p>\n

perguntei-lhe, \u201cwhy do guys ghost<\/a> people, and what’s the purpose of ghosting someone you obviously don’t have any serious intentions with?\u201d<\/p>\n

Ele foi completamente honesto (apesar de ter mudado a minha opini\u00e3o sobre o facto de ele ser um tipo simp\u00e1tico).<\/p>\n

Ele admitiu que estava a fazer isso apenas para provar \u00e0 ex-namorada e aos amigos em comum que podia estar com ela quando e onde quisesse.<\/p>\n

They\u2019ve reappeared for another hookup<\/h3>\n

\"homem<\/p>\n

Na maioria dos casos, regressam apenas porque querem divertir-se mais um pouco. Simplesmente querem desfrutar mais um pouco de uma rela\u00e7\u00e3o sem compromisso e, depois, provavelmente desaparecer\u00e3o de novo.<\/em><\/p>\n

The truth is, they’ll keep coming for casual hookups as long as you allow them to. They’ll keep inviting you to Netflix and chill as long as you keep accepting the invitation.<\/p>\n

Don’t let your mind go the wrong way…<\/strong> Yes, being ghosted hurts, but it’ll hurt even more if you aren’t able to come to terms with the fact that your ghost doesn’t love you the way you love them.<\/em><\/p>\n

They see you just as a casual hookup, and that’s the reason why they end things the way they do each time. Maybe they aren’t even aware of your feelings, and they think that regular hookups are okay for you too.<\/p>\n

In most cases, they aren’t even aware of their mistake<\/h3>\n

\"homem<\/p>\n

Infelizmente, este \u00e9 tamb\u00e9m um cen\u00e1rio muito comum. J\u00e1 o referi na \u00faltima frase do par\u00e1grafo anterior.<\/p>\n

Some men simply think that you don’t share any feelings for them either and that you’re perfectly okay with hooking up from time to time. It’s possible they aren’t even aware that they’re hurting you with their ghostings and returns.<\/p>\n

The more you allow them to come and go from your life in this way, the more they’ll be convinced that you ver tudo como uma aventura casual<\/a> tamb\u00e9m.<\/strong><\/p>\n

That’s why you need to be direct and honest with them the first time they return and tell them how the land lies.<\/p>\n

They’ve been ditched<\/h3>\n

\"uma<\/p>\n

While they were ghosting you, they probably moved on with their dating life. If this is the case, they’ll return to you when their new partner dumps their lame ass.<\/p>\n

Eles voltar\u00e3o para si para procurar conforto e para o usar para esquecer a separa\u00e7\u00e3o. Eu sei que \u00e9 particularmente doloroso ouvir isto, mas esta \u00e9 tamb\u00e9m uma das raz\u00f5es mais comuns pelas quais os fantasmas voltam sempre.<\/p>\n

They’re keeping you on the back burner<\/h3>\n

\"homem<\/p>\n

You were being ghosted by someone, and that person has continued with their dating life. After an amount of time, when they get dumped, they return to you. What’s this telling you?<\/p>\n

Significa que se arrepende de o ter deixado, ou significa que eras o plano de reserva deles<\/a> desde o in\u00edcio? Penso que a resposta \u00e9 bastante \u00f3bvia, certo?<\/p>\n

This is precisely why these kinds of people don’t end things the way they should, why they don’t end the relationship directly. Ghosting \u00e9 simplesmente outra vers\u00e3o de uma rela\u00e7\u00e3o de retaguarda<\/a>.<\/strong><\/p>\n

They don’t want you to move on<\/h3>\n

\"uma<\/p>\n

Do ghosters come back? Yes, the moment they see that you’ve moved on, they’ll instantly appear in your life again. Why do ghosters always come back? Simply because they don’t want to allow you to move on with your life.<\/p>\n

They’re narcissists<\/a> in disguise who simply don’t want you to be happy. They’ll keep showing up unannounced in your life, trying to prevent you from moving on.<\/p>\n

Every time they hear you’ve met someone else, they’ll immediately reach out and bounce back into your life. I know it’s confusing and very difficult to understand, but these people are just like that, too hard to understand and deal with.<\/p>\n

 Talvez tenham saudades tuas?<\/h3>\n

\"um<\/p>\n

I assume you get why I put this reason at the very end of my list. Of course, it’s because these last two reasons are least probable of all.<\/p>\n

To be sincere, they may have returned to your life because they’ve realized that they made a mistake and want to make things right. However, it’s a scenario that isn\u2019t often seen.<\/p>\n

If they’ve ghosted you for less than three days, then it’s possible that they’ve come back because they want to repent for what they did. They may have returned because they miss you, but I wouldn’t get my hopes up if I were you.<\/p>\n

Or MAYBE they realized that the grass wasn’t really greener on the other side after all?!<\/h3>\n

\"um<\/p>\n

As I already said, maybe it’s possible that they’ve understood what they did and that the way they end things with you is unfair.<\/p>\n

Sabes que o karma \u00e9 uma cabra.<\/em> Maybe they’ve met someone else who hurt them, and it made them feel guilty for hurting your feelings. Or perhaps that person has made them realize that the grass isn’t greener on the other side after all.<\/p>\n

This could be true, but the point is that they shouldn\u2019t have needed another person to point it out to them. They should have realized it on their own, and they should never hurt you the way they did.<\/p>\n

Concordo que todos n\u00f3s merecemos uma segunda oportunidade, mas h\u00e1 coisas que s\u00e3o intoler\u00e1veis e imperdo\u00e1veis.<\/p>\n

VER TAMB\u00c9M: Isto \u00e9 o que significa se ele n\u00e3o te contacta h\u00e1 um m\u00eas<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n

Como responder \u00e0s suas reac\u00e7\u00f5es<\/h2>\n

\"uma<\/p>\n

If you’re a lutar com um fantasma que est\u00e1 sempre a voltar<\/a> na sua vida sem aviso pr\u00e9vio, aqui ficam algumas dicas eficientes que o ajudar\u00e3o a lidar com esses regressos indesejados.<\/p>\n

\u2022 Allow yourself to feel your feelings<\/h3>\n

Your feelings are all over the place, and that’s perfectly okay. Just try to gather them up and be more understanding towards yourself.<\/p>\n

It’s okay to feel anger because you’re in a situation where you have every right to be pissed off. It’s also perfectly fine to be happy because the person you care for has returned into your life, implorando por outra oportunidade.<\/a><\/p>\n

I know that there are so many things on your mind right now. I know you’re thinking about what you should do and how you should deal with your ghost’s sudden comeback.<\/p>\n

But, I honestly advise you to stop that thought process right now and simply focus on your emotions. Forget about your mind right now and focus on your heart; try to hear what it’s telling you.<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u2022 Always remember HOW things ended between you<\/h3>\n

O teu fantasma regressou antes mesmo de teres tido tempo para te curares e seguires em frente. Sei que o teu cora\u00e7\u00e3o te est\u00e1 a dizer neste momento que deves perdoar-lhe e esquecer o seu fantasma.<\/p>\n

No entanto, deve lembrar-se sempre de tudo aquilo por que teve de passar enquanto a pessoa o estava a ignorar. Deve ter sempre em mente que a pessoa ignorou, negligenciou e magoou intencionalmente os seus sentimentos.<\/p>\n

\u2022 However, don’t revenge-ghost them<\/h3>\n

When your ghost returns, I know that the first thing that comes to mind is that it’s time to start ghosting them right back. However, that would be a terrible thing to do.<\/p>\n

A verdade \u00e9 que a melhor vingan\u00e7a<\/a> para este tipo de pessoas \u00e9 simplesmente seguir em frente.<\/p>\n

Just because someone treats you badly, just because they’re a bad person, doesn’t mean that you should behave the same way towards them. You should always try to respond peacefully to their sudden returns.<\/p>\n

Allow them to explain their actions. I’m sure they’ll give you a million reasons and excuses for what they did. <\/em><\/p>\n

But remember, I said that you should hear them out; I didn’t say that you should immediately believe every word that comes out of their mouth.<\/em><\/p>\n

\"mulher<\/p>\n

\u2022 Practice the fine art of patience<\/h3>\n

They’ll probably give you a million excuses to justify their behavior. They’ll likely flood you with messages and calls, trying to get your forgiveness.<\/p>\n

However, you should give yourself some time before you make any final decisions. Don’t ever react in anger or make decisions by only listening to your heart because you’ll regret them later.<\/p>\n

\u2022 Be the bigger person and forgive<\/h3>\n

This is a situation where you should prove to them that you’re a pessoa maior<\/a> e perdoar-lhes o facto de o terem tratado da forma como o fizeram.<\/p>\n

That way, you’ll clear your own conscience and won’t have any regrets later. No matter what a person does to you, you should always find the strength in your heart to forgive them for your own peace of mind.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u2022 Still, forgiving them doesn’t mean you should forget what they did<\/h3>\n

The fact is that even if you decide to forgive them and leave it all behind, you’ll never be able to forget all the pain and suffering they made you go through because of their behavior.<\/p>\n

You’ll never be able to forget how you were collecting all the broken pieces of your heart and trying to glue them back together. Even if you’re willing to forget, there will always be some scars left to remind you of the pain of ser fantasma<\/a>.<\/p>\n

\u2022 It also doesn’t mean you should give them a second chance<\/h3>\n

These kinds of people tend to take your forgiveness as if it means that you’re immediately giving them a second chance.<\/p>\n

That’s why you need to be direct with them from the very beginning and tell them the true reason for your act of forgiveness.<\/p>\n

Being forgiving is the quality of a kind, nice person. However, giving someone too many second chances when they don\u2019t deserve it at all is the trait of a foolish person who doesn’t value their worth.<\/p>\n

RELACIONADO: Leia isto se est\u00e1 a pensar em dar-lhe uma segunda oportunidade<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n

\"um<\/p>\n

\u2022 Get closure once and for all<\/h3>\n

Tem de confrontar o seu fantasma e esclarecer as coisas com ele de uma vez por todas. \u00c9 preciso tomar uma decis\u00e3o final e mant\u00ea-la, aconte\u00e7a o que acontecer.<\/p>\n

Se decidir dar-lhes uma segunda oportunidade<\/a> De qualquer forma, deve estabelecer alguns limites e dar-lhes ultimatos.<\/p>\n

Mesmo que optem por seguir em frente com a vossa rela\u00e7\u00e3o, devem ambos tentar melhor\u00e1-la e construir uma rela\u00e7\u00e3o mais forte e saud\u00e1vel.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Por outro lado, se decidir excluir o seu fantasma da sua vida para sempre, deve confront\u00e1-lo apenas para limpar a sua consci\u00eancia e obter o t\u00e3o necess\u00e1rio encerramento.<\/p>\n

It’s really important for both sides to get closure because you won’t be able to move on without it. You’ll both be left with emotional baggage that won’t allow you to move into a new relationship with someone else.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u2022 Find the strength to close the ‘being ghosted’ chapter of your life<\/h3>\n

I know that being ghosted is the worst thing that your loved one can do to you. However, that’s why you need to give yourself time to heal and find the strength to leave it all behind and move the hell on.<\/p>\n

Close all the doors for your ghost, and don’t let them come into your life ever again, no matter how hard they keep knocking.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u00c9 necess\u00e1rio encerrar este cap\u00edtulo da sua vida para seguir em frente. H\u00e1 tantos cap\u00edtulos no livro da sua vida que est\u00e3o \u00e0 espera de serem abertos. H\u00e1 tantas hist\u00f3rias bonitas que est\u00e3o \u00e0 espera que as escreva.<\/p>\n

\u2022 Look at it as a blessing in disguise<\/h3>\n

Look at it all as an incredibly important lesson God wanted to teach you. Because honestly, sometimes God wants you to experience hurtful things just to learn a lesson…<\/p>\n

A lesson that will change your entire life, a lesson that you’ll remember forever.<\/p>\n

Na verdade, devias estar grato pelo teu fantasma porque ele te ensinou que nunca deves receber de volta pessoas que sa\u00edram da tua vida de livre vontade e sem uma boa raz\u00e3o.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Don’t be angry at yourself because you let someone break your heart so many times. Be proud of yourself because you were so brave and endured it all.<\/p>\n

Orgulhe-se de si pr\u00f3prio porque reuniu for\u00e7as para seguir em frente e deixar esta experi\u00eancia horr\u00edvel no passado.<\/p>\n

Conclus\u00e3o<\/h2>\n

\"homem<\/p>\n

In these modern days, with all these ‘modern relationships’ and online dating, etc., ghosting has become really popular. It’s just that with all the social media, dating apps, and so on, people have so many options to ignore someone.<\/p>\n

Ser v\u00edtima de um fantasma d\u00f3i imenso. N\u00e3o ser capaz de compreender porque \u00e9 que algu\u00e9m nos deixa sem resposta pode ser bastante perturbador.<\/p>\n

But the thing that fascinates most of us is why ghosters always come back. It’s pretty obvious that they don’t actually care for the other person, so what keeps them coming back?<\/p>\n

Espero que a minha lista o tenha ajudado a compreender algumas das suas raz\u00f5es e espero ter-lhe ensinado como deve lidar com este tipo de pessoas e com os seus reaparecimentos indesejados na sua vida.<\/p>\n

Francesca Hogi, especialista em relacionamentos de Nova Iorque, afirma; “Fantasma<\/a> is contagious. Once it happens to you, it makes it more likely you\u2019ll do it to someone else. It might be the easy choice at the moment, but it\u2019s bad karma for you and everyone else.”<\/strong><\/p>\n

This is why it’s important to give yourself time to grieve and heal from being ghosted. You’re riding a real emotional rollercoaster here, and you should take time to process that ride peacefully because you may be nauseous from it.<\/p>\n

However, the fact is that you’ll have to finish the ride sooner or later. You’ll have to end things with your ghost for good and leave them in your past… And this time, it needs to be forever.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Being ghosted by someone you love or care for is an awfully painful experience, but the worst thing is that those ghosts tend to return into our lives out of the blue. Why? Why do ghosters always go back to their victims? Is it because they have regrets for everything they’ve done, or is it…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":25,"featured_media":127544,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29622],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-127536","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-relationship-advice"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29622,"label":"relationship advice"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/03\/Why-Ghosters-Always-Come-Back-And-How-To-Deal-With-Their-Returns-1024x682.jpg",1024,682,true],"author_info":{"display_name":"Amy Nicholson","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/author\/amy\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29622,"name":"relationship advice","slug":"relationship-advice","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29622,"taxonomy":"category","description":"Making all aspects of your relationship work is one of the biggest challenges. Here, you can find advice for most of the issues you might encounter. ","parent":29620,"count":544,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29622,"category_count":544,"category_description":"Making all aspects of your relationship work is one of the biggest challenges. Here, you can find advice for most of the issues you might encounter. ","cat_name":"relationship advice","category_nicename":"relationship-advice","category_parent":29620}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/127536","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/25"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=127536"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/127536\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/127544"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=127536"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=127536"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=127536"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}