{"id":12876,"date":"2018-01-22T12:02:19","date_gmt":"2018-01-22T12:02:19","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/herway.net\/?p=12876"},"modified":"2022-02-22T16:02:24","modified_gmt":"2022-02-22T16:02:24","slug":"o-melhor-nunca-e-suficiente","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/o-melhor-nunca-e-suficiente\/","title":{"rendered":"Para ti o meu melhor nunca foi suficiente"},"content":{"rendered":"

Dei-te tudo o que podia. Nunca foi suficiente.<\/a> Nunca fui suficiente<\/a>. Nada te poder\u00e1 satisfazer.<\/span><\/p>\n

A primeira vez que te vi, o meu cora\u00e7\u00e3o saltou uma batida, as minhas m\u00e3os tremiam. Era como se tudo me estivesse a dizer para fugir. Para fugir o mais longe poss\u00edvel e nunca olhar para tr\u00e1s. <\/span><\/p>\n

O meu corpo e o meu cora\u00e7\u00e3o diziam-me o que era melhor para mim naquele momento, mas de alguma forma eu queria que tu fosses a melhor coisa para mim. <\/span><\/p>\n

Foi t\u00e3o generoso no in\u00edcio, nunca tentando fazer-me sentir mal-amado e inferior, mas sim apreciado e cuidado.<\/span><\/p>\n

Unfortunately, this didn’t really last too long. It lasted to the point where you started finding mistakes in everything I did.<\/b><\/p>\n

Nunca nada era suficientemente bom. Como uma maldi\u00e7\u00e3o.<\/span><\/p>\n

Eu ficava acordada toda a noite \u00e0 espera que chegasses a casa e tu gritavas comigo por estar acordada tanto tempo. Eu fazia-te o jantar e tu atiravas tudo para o outro lado da sala, apesar de o teres comido com alegria poucos dias antes. <\/span><\/p>\n

Even if I would surrender to your abuse every time you would start, it wasn’t good enough because you thought that I was pathetic. I was your slave; I was your victim and everything someone else wouldn’t endure.<\/span><\/p>\n

Para outra pessoa, tu eras aquele rapaz bonito, aquele que eu conheci no in\u00edcio.<\/b> Para os outros, eras gentil e generoso, mas para mim n\u00e3o passavas de um idiota (para dizer o m\u00ednimo). J\u00e1 n\u00e3o havia nada de bom e nada de bom voltaria a acontecer.<\/span><\/p>\n

O momento Decidi deixar-te<\/a> foi a \u00fanica decis\u00e3o de que me orgulhei. Desta vez, ia ser suficientemente bom para mim pr\u00f3prio.<\/b><\/p>\n

E se te perguntaste: sim, lembro-me da tua rea\u00e7\u00e3o no momento em que te disse que me ia embora. <\/span><\/p>\n

You threw a glass against the wall and you didn’t think twice about throwing another one towards me.<\/b> The running around and the crying and desperate attempt to escape are the things that I still dream about. It’s like trying to escape a sure death.<\/span><\/p>\n

Mas eu escapei.<\/span><\/p>\n

I left you everything but myself. I left you my entire life, but I took my damaged heart with myself. You weren’t able to keep it safe. You were never able to do that.<\/span><\/p>\n

Am I good enough now? Am I good enough now that you don’t have me anymore. Now that I have realised that n\u00e3o h\u00e1 nada mais importante do que eu pr\u00f3prio<\/a>?<\/span><\/p>\n

The bruises are fading, it’ll take them some time to heal, but it’s better to be left in scars than to be a walking wound.<\/b><\/p>\n

Isn’t it funny that I thought that I deserved everything that happened because of the way you manipulated me into thinking that I was the problem in our relationship and that there was nothing I could actually do to make myself worthy of your time?<\/span><\/p>\n

Hoje, depois de estar no meu caminho de felicidade, rio-me de tudo o que aconteceu. Rio-me enquanto as l\u00e1grimas me correm pela cara e todo o meu corpo treme (porque foi traumatizante), mas mesmo assim rio-me. <\/span><\/p>\n

I laugh to make myself feel better about it\u2014no matter the fact that nothing can ever change the past as much as I would want to have the ability to change it.<\/span><\/p>\n

I’ve learned my lesson. I’ve dodged the bullet to the point where it just hit me to make me bleed, but it didn’t kill me.<\/span><\/p>\n

I will rise from my ashes again, but you will forever be buried in your body\u2014the body of an abuser, not able to love or feel anything but anger towards his own self. <\/b><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I gave you everything I could. It was never enough. I was never enough. Nothing could ever satisfy you. The first time I set eyes on you my heart skipped a beat, my hands were shaking. It was like everything was telling me to run away. To run as far as I could and to…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":40,"featured_media":12893,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29618],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-12876","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-moving-on"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29618,"label":"moving on"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/01\/allef-vinicius-347070.jpg",800,564,false],"author_info":{"display_name":"Tara Brown","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/author\/tara-brown\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29618,"name":"moving on","slug":"moving-on","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29618,"taxonomy":"category","description":"When nothing else works - inspiring stories about moving on are bound to help you let go of people and situations you never thought you could live without.\r\n","parent":38,"count":200,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29618,"category_count":200,"category_description":"When nothing else works - inspiring stories about moving on are bound to help you let go of people and situations you never thought you could live without.\r\n","cat_name":"moving on","category_nicename":"moving-on","category_parent":38}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12876","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/40"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=12876"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12876\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/12893"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=12876"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=12876"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=12876"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}