{"id":17970,"date":"2018-04-23T12:42:24","date_gmt":"2018-04-23T12:42:24","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/herway.net\/?p=17970"},"modified":"2022-02-26T22:25:22","modified_gmt":"2022-02-26T22:25:22","slug":"ele-nao-e-mais-do-que-um-mau-habito-que-precisa-de-abandonar","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/ele-nao-e-mais-do-que-um-mau-habito-que-precisa-de-abandonar\/","title":{"rendered":"Ele n\u00e3o \u00e9 nada mais do que um mau h\u00e1bito que precisa de abandonar"},"content":{"rendered":"

Your phone lights up and your heart is racing because you see his name. After so much time, after so many \u201cgoodbyes forever\u201d and \u201cnever mores\u201d he is here again, making a small step to crawl back into your life. And you are letting him, even though <\/span>you know you shouldn\u2019t. <\/span><\/a><\/p>\n

You know the best thing to do is delete that text without even reading it. You know it to well because you\u2019ve already lived through this same scenario more times than necessary. You know he is toxic. You know nothing will be different this time. But your hope is pushing you to believe in him just one more time. You silence that voice inside of you that screams to run away from him and you let him in once more. <\/span><\/p>\n

The minute you open the text you know you shouldn\u2019t have. This feeling of guilt consumes you. You know he will pull you back into his mess once again.<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n

He is like a bad habit you can\u2019t break. You let him in. You trust him again. You think that maybe this time things will be different. Maybe this time he is here to stay. Maybe this time you will have a shot at being happy. <\/span><\/p>\n

Agora est\u00e1 um pouco diferente. Est\u00e1 mais atento. Nunca se esquece de ver como est\u00e1s durante o dia. Lembra-se de mandar uma mensagem de boa noite. Arranja sempre tempo. Est\u00e1 a ganhar de novo a sua confian\u00e7a. Est\u00e1 a criar espa\u00e7o para si na vida dele. Parece que as coisas est\u00e3o finalmente a come\u00e7ar a encaixar-se. <\/span>But it\u2019s all an illusion. <\/b><\/p>\n

In a split second, he changes his mind. He walks away once again, leaving you to pick up the pieces of your heart and your dignity, cursing the day you opened and answered that text. You know if you hadn\u2019t, you wouldn\u2019t be here again. <\/span><\/p>\n

Sabes que ele vai <\/span>voltar de novo<\/span><\/a>. You swear you will never let him close again. He crossed all your boundaries. You\u2019ve finally had enough of this back and forth. And that feeling follows you for some time. It\u2019s sadness combined with anger and disappointment.<\/span> But the truth is you don\u2019t know. You don\u2019t know if it\u2019s all over until he sends a text one more time. <\/i><\/b><\/p>\n

Only at that point, you will know if you are really over him. You will know if you managed to break that bad habit. Because that\u2019s all he is. Don\u2019t confuse him with your one true love. He is far from love. Love doesn\u2019t hurt you in that way. Love doesn\u2019t disrespect. Love doesn\u2019t play games. Love doesn\u2019t leave. <\/span><\/p>\n

Perguntam-se como \u00e9 que eu sei tudo isto? Sei porque j\u00e1 fui tu em tempos. <\/b>Eu fui aquela rapariga que abriu e respondeu \u00e0 mensagem quando tudo dentro dela gritava para n\u00e3o o fazer. Fui eu que acreditei nas suas desculpas deplor\u00e1veis. Eu sou aquela que confundiu um h\u00e1bito com amor. <\/span><\/p>\n

And it took me so much time and strength not to open or answer that text when it arrived. But I finally reached the point where that text didn\u2019t mean anything; where his words lost all their weight and became meaningless; where inviting him back into my life became unimaginable. <\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Eu era o seu porto seguro. Algu\u00e9m com quem ele sabia que podia contar para estar l\u00e1, acontecesse o que acontecesse. Algu\u00e9m fi\u00e1vel. Algu\u00e9m que espera e o recebe de volta. E ele estava sempre a navegar para tr\u00e1s e para a frente, sem se importar que o porto ficasse destru\u00eddo. Ele sabia que o porto se renovaria quando ele <\/span>volta novamente<\/span><\/a>. <\/span><\/p>\n

Ele tinha raz\u00e3o. Eu renovei-me. Porque de cada vez que ele decidia ir-se embora, eu tinha de come\u00e7ar do zero.<\/b> Tive de me erguer. Tinha de encontrar a minha autoestima e cur\u00e1-la. Tinha de me lembrar que tamb\u00e9m sou importante. Que os meus sentimentos s\u00e3o importantes. Que tenho de aprender a amar-me. <\/span><\/p>\n

E assim que eu melhorava, assim que seguia em frente, ele voltava. Dava-lhe as boas-vindas e voltava ao in\u00edcio com tudo o que constru\u00ed em ru\u00ednas, mais uma vez, e mais uma vez, at\u00e9 que finalmente me apercebi que tinha batido no fundo do po\u00e7o. <\/span>Until I realized he isn\u2019t going to change, I am the one who has to change. I am the one who has to stop allowing him to hurt me. <\/b><\/p>\n

So next time he wanted to come back, I didn\u2019t let him. <\/b>Next time his name lighted up the screen of my phone, I ignored it. I wasn\u2019t about to let all the work I had done on myself go to waste this time. It took me a lot of time and effort to get to this state of mind, to get my life back on track, just so I could ruin it by giving him <\/span>mais hip\u00f3teses<\/span><\/a>. <\/span><\/p>\n

Depois disso, tudo na minha vida tomou um rumo diferente.<\/b> Nada aconteceu de um dia para o outro. Apesar de tudo, precisei de algum tempo para me curar. Mas, eventualmente, as coisas melhoraram. Deixei de desperdi\u00e7ar a minha vida com ele. Comecei a ver realmente o meu pr\u00f3prio valor. Descobri como sou muito mais feliz sem ele a invadir constantemente a minha vida. Encontrei a paz de que n\u00e3o estou a desistir. <\/span><\/p>\n

Nem tu devias. Mereces muito mais do que passar a tua vida \u00e0 espera. Passar as noites a chorar. Passar os dias \u00e0 espera. Mereces ser feliz. Mereces algu\u00e9m melhor<\/a>. Tu mereces-te a ti pr\u00f3prio.  <\/span>Por isso, da pr\u00f3xima vez que receber uma mensagem de texto, um telefonema ou qualquer tentativa esfarrapada de voltar \u00e0 sua vida, o que vai fazer? <\/b><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Your phone lights up and your heart is racing because you see his name. After so much time, after so many \u201cgoodbyes forever\u201d and \u201cnever mores\u201d he is here again, making a small step to crawl back into your life. And you are letting him, even though you know you shouldn\u2019t. You know the best…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":40,"featured_media":18420,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29618],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-17970","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-moving-on"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29618,"label":"moving on"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/allef-vinicius-200366-unsplash-1.jpg",800,533,false],"author_info":{"display_name":"Tara Brown","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/author\/tara-brown\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29618,"name":"moving on","slug":"moving-on","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29618,"taxonomy":"category","description":"When nothing else works - inspiring stories about moving on are bound to help you let go of people and situations you never thought you could live without.\r\n","parent":38,"count":200,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29618,"category_count":200,"category_description":"When nothing else works - inspiring stories about moving on are bound to help you let go of people and situations you never thought you could live without.\r\n","cat_name":"moving on","category_nicename":"moving-on","category_parent":38}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17970","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/40"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=17970"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17970\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/18420"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=17970"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=17970"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=17970"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}