{"id":31754,"date":"2020-01-24T08:29:40","date_gmt":"2020-01-24T08:29:40","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/herway.net\/?p=31754"},"modified":"2022-08-18T11:45:55","modified_gmt":"2022-08-18T11:45:55","slug":"o-meu-marido-traiu-me-e-eis-como-recuperei","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/o-meu-marido-traiu-me-e-eis-como-recuperei\/","title":{"rendered":"O meu marido traiu-me e eis como me recuperei"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>O dia em que recebi a not\u00edcia da trai\u00e7\u00e3o do meu marido foi provavelmente um dos piores sentimentos que alguma vez senti na minha vida.<\/p>\n<p>Lembro-me do entorpecimento. Choque e incredulidade pelo facto de o homem com quem tinha passado tantos anos ter tido rela\u00e7\u00f5es sexuais com outra mulher.<\/p>\n<p>I couldn\u2019t breathe. I was fighting for air, feeling empty and hollow, unable to utter a word.<\/p>\n<p>He was sitting there beside me, crying and telling me everything because it was eating away at him, and he felt I needed to know. It had happened \u2018\u2019only\u2019\u2019 once, and he was extremely broken up about it.<\/p>\n<p><b><i>I needed time to process it. The love of my life had slept with another woman and broken the complete trust I had in him, and I didn\u2019t know how I could ever recover from that.<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p>H\u00e1 uns anos, foi um dia muito, muito dif\u00edcil. O meu marido lutava contra as l\u00e1grimas enquanto me confessava os pormenores do que tinha acontecido, quando e com quem.<\/p>\n<p>I wasn\u2019t sure if I even wanted to know but I couldn\u2019t bring myself to stop him.<\/p>\n<p>Eu estava a ouvir e esperava estar a sonhar. Mas os seus solu\u00e7os continuavam a acordar-me e faziam-me perceber que era tudo demasiado real.<\/p>\n<p>My heart was instantly broken into so many pieces, and I could feel my soul almost leaving my body. My eyes were wide open, and my mouth couldn\u2019t utter a single word.<\/p>\n<p>I couldn\u2019t find the appropriate reaction to what I was hearing, and he kept begging me to say something, anything\u2026<\/p>\n<p>All I could say was a quiet, unsure: \u2018\u2019Why\u2026?\u2019\u2019 knowing that whatever I would hear next wouldn\u2019t make me feel the least bit better.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-79748\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/young-woman-crying-desperately.jpg\" alt=\"jovem mulher a chorar desesperadamente\" width=\"800\" height=\"534\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/young-woman-crying-desperately.jpg 800w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/young-woman-crying-desperately-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/young-woman-crying-desperately-768x513.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Ele sabia que n\u00e3o havia uma resposta aceit\u00e1vel, por isso continuou a dizer que era a coisa mais est\u00fapida que alguma vez tinha feito e que faria qualquer coisa para me mostrar o quanto estava arrependido.<\/p>\n<p>A situa\u00e7\u00e3o estava a afect\u00e1-lo muito e, embora eu n\u00e3o defenda a trai\u00e7\u00e3o, vi como ele estava destro\u00e7ado pela decis\u00e3o horr\u00edvel que tinha tomado h\u00e1 alguns meses.<\/p>\n<p>Today, I am writing this with my heart in once piece and a good head on my shoulders, to tell you I stayed. We are still \u2018us\u2019 and our marriage has survived.<\/p>\n<p>Hoje, posso contar-vos exatamente como cheg\u00e1mos a este ponto e como consegui manter-me firme para meu bem, do meu filho e, finalmente, do meu marido.<\/p>\n<p>O caso, se \u00e9 que lhe posso chamar isso, uma vez que s\u00f3 durou uma noite, teve lugar alguns meses antes da sua admiss\u00e3o.<\/p>\n<p>It was a woman he had met through mutual friends, and it was after a night out celebrating a friend\u2019s promotion.<\/p>\n<p><b><i>N\u00e3o vou entrar em pormenores sobre a mulher porque ela \u00e9 irrelevante neste caso. <\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p><b><i>Vou antes centrar-me no meu marido e nas suas ac\u00e7\u00f5es ap\u00f3s esse infeliz acontecimento, e na forma como sobrevivi, recuperei e aprendi a perdoar.<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p>Em primeiro lugar, o que mais me agradece nesta situa\u00e7\u00e3o de merda \u00e9 o facto de ter durado apenas uma noite, de n\u00e3o ter sido com ningu\u00e9m que eu conhecesse, de ele ter sido suficientemente inteligente para usar prote\u00e7\u00e3o e de n\u00e3o ter havido sentimentos envolvidos.<\/p>\n<p>I know it\u2019s a messed up word to use when I say \u2018thankful\u2019 but honestly, it could\u2019ve been much worse.<\/p>\n<p>This way, at least I didn\u2019t get an STD, there wasn\u2019t a pregnancy involved, and my child never has to find out about his dad\u2019s indiscretion.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-79750\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/mother-cuddling-with-little-daughter-on-the-bed.jpg\" alt=\"m\u00e3e a abra\u00e7ar a filha pequena na cama\" width=\"800\" height=\"534\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/mother-cuddling-with-little-daughter-on-the-bed.jpg 800w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/mother-cuddling-with-little-daughter-on-the-bed-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/mother-cuddling-with-little-daughter-on-the-bed-768x513.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>I am not condoning this behavior, and to each their own. I respect the fact that not everybody would\u2019ve stayed, and anyone who makes that decision has every right to do so.<\/p>\n<p>Mas, para mim, senti que as circunst\u00e2ncias eram um pouco melhores do que as que esperava inicialmente quando soube, por isso estava determinada a fazer tudo o que pudesse para tentar salvar o nosso casamento e proteger o nosso filho.<\/p>\n<p>The most important thing for me was, after coming to terms with this, that I saw how all-encompassing my husband\u2019s remorse was.<\/p>\n<p>He had kept it to himself for months because he couldn\u2019t bring himself to crush me like that and risk me leaving him.<\/p>\n<p><b><i>Sei que ele me ama mais do que a pr\u00f3pria vida. E eu amo-o a ele. Por isso, senti que devia dar-nos <\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/relationship\/6-things-to-consider-when-your-ex-is-begging-for-another-chance\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><b><i>outra oportunidade<\/i><\/b><\/a><b><i> no amor.<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p>It wasn\u2019t easy. Not by a mile. The first few weeks after having learned about this were fight or flight.<\/p>\n<p>I couldn\u2019t look him in the eyes. Every time I would look at him I immediately went back to the day I found out, and his swollen eyes from crying, and I just couldn\u2019t relive it.<\/p>\n<p>Eu sabia o qu\u00e3o lixado era para ele tamb\u00e9m. Ele sabia que n\u00e3o havia nada que pudesse fazer para melhorar as coisas para mim, por isso estava apenas a tentar<a href=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/viver-um-dia-de-cada-vez\/\"> viver um dia de cada vez<\/a> and hope I didn\u2019t do something rash.<\/p>\n<p>We both knew that it was a horrible mistake, and since it wasn\u2019t an emotional thing, nor was there ever a possibility of him leaving me for her, we decided to try and get through it as a united front.<\/p>\n<p>I didn\u2019t forgive him just like that. I was still mad. I was pissed, and at times I would let him know.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-79752\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/man-apologizing-to-angry-woman-in-bedroom.jpg\" alt=\"homem a pedir desculpa a uma mulher zangada no quarto\" width=\"800\" height=\"534\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/man-apologizing-to-angry-woman-in-bedroom.jpg 800w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/man-apologizing-to-angry-woman-in-bedroom-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/man-apologizing-to-angry-woman-in-bedroom-768x513.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/p>\n<p><b><i>He never tried to make it into something that it wasn\u2019t. He never made excuses, not one. <\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p><b><i>Ele estava a assumir o facto a cem por cento, e eu vi como ele estava genuinamente arrependido.<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p>He didn\u2019t want to lose what we had, and after so many years of marriage, a beautiful child and getting through every obstacle, we both knew we would find a way through this as well.<\/p>\n<p>N\u00e3o houve nada que afectasse o meu marido t\u00e3o gravemente como saber que ele me tinha partido naquele dia. Ele era uma concha do seu antigo eu.<\/p>\n<p>Nada se compara \u00e0 dimens\u00e3o do impacto que isto teve sobre ele, e isso fez-me perceber o quanto ele realmente me ama.<\/p>\n<p>He easily could\u2019ve left. He could\u2019ve been a coward and taken the easiest way out. He didn\u2019t have to tell me. I probably never would\u2019ve found out if he hadn\u2019t.<\/p>\n<p>Mas ele f\u00ea-lo. Ele sabia que me devia isso. E isso \u00e9 algo que eu apreciei.<\/p>\n<p>He admitted he did something that affected me so horribly, and he couldn\u2019t stand seeing me so broken in the following weeks.<\/p>\n<p>There was still so much love between us. As hurt as I was, I never thought of leaving. I couldn\u2019t see a future without him. I knew this was an obstacle I would learn to overcome.<\/p>\n<p>Vi-o muito claramente. A humildade nele. O remorso que ele sentia profundamente pelos seus actos.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-79754\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/sad-man-sitting-on-sofa.jpg\" alt=\"homem triste sentado num sof\u00e1\" width=\"800\" height=\"534\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/sad-man-sitting-on-sofa.jpg 800w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/sad-man-sitting-on-sofa-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/sad-man-sitting-on-sofa-768x513.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Nunca esperou que eu perdoasse ou sequer compreendesse, apenas esperava que eu ainda o amasse o suficiente para lhe dar uma oportunidade de se redimir.<\/p>\n<p><b><i>N\u00e3o me arrependo de ter ficado com ele. Estou orgulhosa de mim pr\u00f3pria por ter lutado contra isto e por ter lutado por um amor que era demasiado grande para o deixarmos definhar.<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p>Nunca me senti confusa, insegura ou arrependida da minha decis\u00e3o de trabalhar para reparar a nossa rela\u00e7\u00e3o.<\/p>\n<p>Ia ser sempre assim. S\u00f3 precisava de tempo para encontrar a for\u00e7a para voltar a olhar o meu marido nos olhos e perceber e aceitar os remorsos que ele tinha.<\/p>\n<p>Ele ser\u00e1 o primeiro a dizer-vos que este foi, de longe, o maior erro da sua vida. Sem hesita\u00e7\u00e3o. Tudo o resto \u00e9 insignificante em compara\u00e7\u00e3o.<\/p>\n<p>Magoar-me foi a coisa mais dif\u00edcil que ele alguma vez fez. Sei que ele nunca se vai perdoar por isso, e foi por isso que aprendi a perdo\u00e1-lo.<\/p>\n<p>O facto de ter um filho s\u00f3 facilitou ainda mais a tomada desta decis\u00e3o.<\/p>\n<p><b><i>Ainda est\u00e1vamos muito <\/i><\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/amor\/15-dicas-sobre-como-fazer-qualquer-homem-apaixonar-se-loucamente-por-si\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><b><i>no amor<\/i><\/b><\/a><b><i>. Continuamos a p\u00f4r-nos um ao outro em primeiro lugar. Ainda far\u00edamos tudo no mundo um pelo outro e, por essas raz\u00f5es, foi f\u00e1cil decidir ficarmos juntos.<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p>I wasn\u2019t going to throw away so many happy and fulfilled years with each other due to one horrible mistake.<\/p>\n<p>Eu vi a luz ao fundo do t\u00fanel e finalmente encontr\u00e1mo-la.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-79757\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/couple-hugging-on-a-pier.jpg\" alt=\"casal abra\u00e7ado num cais\" width=\"800\" height=\"534\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/couple-hugging-on-a-pier.jpg 800w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/couple-hugging-on-a-pier-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/couple-hugging-on-a-pier-768x513.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Mas deu algum trabalho. O meu marido estava pronto a ouvir-me desabafar, queixar-se e chorar sempre que me sentia zangada.<\/p>\n<p>Qualquer que fosse a emo\u00e7\u00e3o que sentisse, exprimia-a abertamente e nunca guardava nada.<\/p>\n<p>Gritei-lhe mais vezes do que estou disposta a contar, e ele estava mais do que disposto a aguentar.<\/p>\n<p>Ele deixou-me sentir o que eu sentia todos os dias, e o facto de estar t\u00e3o disposto a deixar-me encontrar o meu caminho para o perd\u00e3o foi o que tornou a decis\u00e3o t\u00e3o f\u00e1cil.<\/p>\n<p>Sugeri-lhe que fosse a um conselheiro e ele mostrou-se mais do que aberto a isso. Fomos durante alguns meses e ele aparecia sempre.<\/p>\n<p>Ouviu-me falar do vazio e do desamparo em que me sentia e assumiu toda a responsabilidade pelos seus actos, sem nunca inventar uma \u00fanica desculpa.<\/p>\n<p>A cada m\u00eas que passava, as coisas tornavam-se mais f\u00e1ceis. Finalmente, conseguia olhar para ele sem me sentir zangada e ele portava-se bem todos os dias.<\/p>\n<p>I really didn\u2019t make it easy on him, but he never complained, and all he ever wanted was to keep loving me and remain in this marriage with me.<\/p>\n<p><b><i>Encontrar de novo o caminho para a felicidade n\u00e3o foi um percurso f\u00e1cil e n\u00e3o espero que toda a gente compreenda ou concorde com a minha decis\u00e3o. Mas nem todas as situa\u00e7\u00f5es s\u00e3o iguais e nem todas as pessoas s\u00e3o iguais.<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p>O que eu vi foi <a href=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/sinais-de-que-ele-se-arrepende-de-ter-traido\/\">arrependimento e remorso nos olhos do homem<\/a> Amo-o mais do que tudo no mundo, e a sua honestidade e vontade de fazer tudo o que fosse preciso para sobrevivermos a isto fez-me perceber que tomei a melhor decis\u00e3o ao ficar com ele.<\/p>\n<p>Ao dizer isto, n\u00e3o encorajo ningu\u00e9m a ficar com <a href=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/49-sinais-de-um-parceiro-traidor\/\">um parceiro traidor.<\/a><\/p>\n<p>Toda a gente tem o direito de fazer o que \u00e9 melhor para si e para a sua fam\u00edlia. E eu fiz o que achei que era correto para a minha, e n\u00e3o me arrependo nem por um segundo.<\/p>\n<p>Choosing love and forgiveness was my decision because I didn\u2019t want to spend my life far from a person who I knew loved me more than he could possibly put into words.<\/p>\n<p>For me, life is too short to spend it on anger, resentment and misery. Those weren\u2019t really an option. I always strive to find a way out of any unfortunate situation, and that is exactly what I did.<\/p>\n<p><b><i>A minha fam\u00edlia \u00e9 o meu mundo e a preserva\u00e7\u00e3o do nosso amor e uni\u00e3o ser\u00e1 sempre algo de que me orgulho muito.<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-79762\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/My-Husband-Cheated-On-Me-And-Here\u2019s-How-I-Recovered-pinterest.jpg\" alt=\"O meu marido traiu-me e eis como me recuperei\" width=\"1000\" height=\"1500\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/My-Husband-Cheated-On-Me-And-Here\u2019s-How-I-Recovered-pinterest.jpg 1000w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/My-Husband-Cheated-On-Me-And-Here\u2019s-How-I-Recovered-pinterest-200x300.jpg 200w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/My-Husband-Cheated-On-Me-And-Here\u2019s-How-I-Recovered-pinterest-683x1024.jpg 683w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/My-Husband-Cheated-On-Me-And-Here\u2019s-How-I-Recovered-pinterest-768x1152.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1000px) 100vw, 1000px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The day I got the news of my husband\u2019s cheating was probably one of the worst feelings I had ever felt in my life. I remember the numbness. Shock and disbelief that the man I had spent so many years with had had sex with another woman. I couldn\u2019t breathe. I was fighting for air,&#8230;<\/p>","protected":false},"author":40,"featured_media":79761,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29626],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-31754","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-affair"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29626,"label":"affair"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/01\/My-Husband-Cheated-On-Me-And-Here\u2019s-How-I-Recovered.jpg",800,534,false],"author_info":{"display_name":"Tara Brown","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/author\/tara-brown\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29626,"name":"affair","slug":"affair","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29626,"taxonomy":"category","description":"If you want to learn more about affairs, here you'll learn about different types of infidelity, how affairs happen, how to recognize a cheater, and more.","parent":29620,"count":132,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29626,"category_count":132,"category_description":"If you want to learn more about affairs, here you'll learn about different types of infidelity, how affairs happen, how to recognize a cheater, and more.","cat_name":"affair","category_nicename":"affair","category_parent":29620}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/31754","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/40"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=31754"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/31754\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/79761"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=31754"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=31754"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=31754"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}