{"id":39772,"date":"2019-07-03T11:47:15","date_gmt":"2019-07-03T11:47:15","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/herway.net\/?p=39772"},"modified":"2022-03-23T12:17:01","modified_gmt":"2022-03-23T12:17:01","slug":"6-truques-inteligentes-para-o-ajudar-a-falar-com-um-parceiro-demasiado-defensivo","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/6-truques-inteligentes-para-o-ajudar-a-falar-com-um-parceiro-demasiado-defensivo\/","title":{"rendered":"6 truques inteligentes para o ajudar a falar com um parceiro demasiado defensivo"},"content":{"rendered":"<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Est\u00e1 numa situa\u00e7\u00e3o est\u00e1vel, <a href=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/relationship\/8-coisas-que-ele-so-fara-se-voces-estiverem-numa-relacao-de-compromisso\/\">rela\u00e7\u00f5es de compromisso<\/a>p. Your partner makes you genuinely happy and you have stood the test of time. There\u2019s not much you\u2019d change, but there is that one thing\u2026<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Whenever he does something that upsets you and whenever there\u2019s something you need to discuss, he gets overly defensive, crosses his arms, and cannot take any constructive criticism.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">There is no talking to him when he does something wrong, and you don\u2019t know how to get through to him.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">People who get this defensive when confronted with their actions usually feel like a complete failure if they\u2019ve done something wrong, and admitting it makes them severely uncomfortable.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Assim, em vez de serem capazes de o ouvir e de falar como uma pessoa normal, recorrem a <a href=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/dar-a-alguem-o-tratamento-do-silencio-diz-muito-sobre-o-seu-caracter\/\">o tratamento silencioso<\/a> e\/ou acusam-no de estar constantemente a implicar com eles.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Unfortunately, you can\u2019t change how a person acts and reacts to your words, but you CAN change how you approach the conversation with them.&nbsp;<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Por isso, aqui est\u00e3o alguns truques inteligentes concebidos para o ajudar a falar com o seu parceiro demasiado defensivo e a encontrar uma forma pac\u00edfica de comunicar.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">1. Steer clear of the \u201cblame language\u201d<\/h2>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"800\" height=\"534\" class=\"wp-image-39775\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/shutterstock_766165444.jpg\" alt=\"6 truques inteligentes para o ajudar a falar com um parceiro demasiado defensivo\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/shutterstock_766165444.jpg 800w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/shutterstock_766165444-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/shutterstock_766165444-768x513.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/figure>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Refrain from using phrases like \u201cYou did this\u2026\u201d or \u201cYou didn\u2019t listen to me, again\u2026\u201d and don\u2019t use words such as \u201calways\u201d or \u201dnever\u201d.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Isto faz com que o seu parceiro n\u00e3o tenha outra hip\u00f3tese sen\u00e3o sentir-se culpado e individualizado.  Estas atitudes s\u00e3o muito cr\u00edticas e obrigam imediatamente a pessoa a tomar uma posi\u00e7\u00e3o defensiva.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Em vez disso, tente dizer-lhes como se sente e como as ac\u00e7\u00f5es deles o afectaram.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Do not point fingers but rather make it clear that you feel a certain way and you wish that wasn\u2019t the case.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Isso pode fazer com que o seu parceiro reavalie as suas ac\u00e7\u00f5es e baixe a guarda.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">2. Iniciar a conversa com uma nota positiva<\/h2>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"800\" height=\"533\" class=\"wp-image-39776\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/bench-colleague-communication-2029619.jpg\" alt=\"6 truques inteligentes para o ajudar a falar com um parceiro demasiado defensivo\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/bench-colleague-communication-2029619.jpg 800w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/bench-colleague-communication-2029619-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/bench-colleague-communication-2029619-768x512.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/figure>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It is important that, before you accuse them of something, you let them know how much they mean to you and that you don\u2019t want to lose them.&nbsp;<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">You can say \u201cI am only telling you this because I deeply care about you and want this to last.\u201d<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Fazer <a href=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/relationship\/o-que-fazer-se-voce-e-o-seu-parceiro-nao-falam-a-mesma-lingua-do-amor\/\">o seu parceiro<\/a> Sinto que isto vem de um lugar positivo e que tudo o que est\u00e1 a tentar fazer \u00e9 encontrar uma solu\u00e7\u00e3o para se poder curar e seguir em frente.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">They don\u2019t need to keep hearing about how they messed up, it will only make them close off even more.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Seja simp\u00e1tico e mantenha-se esperan\u00e7ado numa solu\u00e7\u00e3o, ao mesmo tempo que lhe diz o quanto aprecia o seu esfor\u00e7o para melhorar.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">3. Permita-se ser vulner\u00e1vel e assuma a sua quota-parte de responsabilidade<\/h2>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"800\" height=\"602\" class=\"wp-image-39777\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/adult-beautiful-business-attire-2422280-3.jpg\" alt=\"6 truques inteligentes para o ajudar a falar com um parceiro demasiado defensivo\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/adult-beautiful-business-attire-2422280-3.jpg 800w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/adult-beautiful-business-attire-2422280-3-300x226.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/adult-beautiful-business-attire-2422280-3-768x578.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/figure>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Para fazer com que o seu parceiro quebre as barreiras e se abra consigo, comece por faz\u00ea-lo voc\u00ea mesmo.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Share a vulnerable part of yourself and show him that you\u2019re no stranger to messing up.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And if there is any portion of this that\u2019s your fault \u2013 own up to it.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Isto far\u00e1 com que o seu parceiro veja que est\u00e1 num lugar seguro e livre de culpa e come\u00e7ar\u00e1 a relaxar e a tornar-se mais propenso a uma discuss\u00e3o saud\u00e1vel.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Ele precisa de se sentir seguro e n\u00e3o julgado, o que o ajudar\u00e1 a ultrapassar a sua atitude defensiva.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">4. Don\u2019t diminish their right to feel a certain way<\/h2>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"800\" height=\"563\" class=\"wp-image-39778\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/adult-beverage-blur-618550-1.jpg\" alt=\"6 truques inteligentes para o ajudar a falar com um parceiro demasiado defensivo\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/adult-beverage-blur-618550-1.jpg 800w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/adult-beverage-blur-618550-1-300x211.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/adult-beverage-blur-618550-1-768x540.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/figure>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Never try to take away a person\u2019s right to feel how they\u2019re feeling. Everybody\u2019s entitled to their emotions.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Just because it\u2019s not ideal for you, doesn\u2019t make them invalid. So let your man know that you respect his feelings and are in no way trying to diminish them.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Mas, ao mesmo tempo, explique como est\u00e1 a afetar <a href=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/relationship\/se-nao-consegue-falar-com-ele-sobre-estas-5-coisas-a-sua-relacao-nao-tem-futuro\/\">a sua rela\u00e7\u00e3o<\/a> e faz\u00ea-lo ver que tamb\u00e9m tens emo\u00e7\u00f5es.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u00c9 evidente que n\u00e3o se est\u00e3o a integrar, pelo que o vosso \u00fanico objetivo \u00e9 encontrar um meio-termo, respeitando um ao outro e deixando as vossas emo\u00e7\u00f5es virem \u00e0 superf\u00edcie.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">5. Fazer-lhes perguntas com sentido<\/h2>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"800\" height=\"481\" class=\"wp-image-39779\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/adult-blur-city-953207.jpg\" alt=\"6 truques inteligentes para o ajudar a falar com um parceiro demasiado defensivo\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/adult-blur-city-953207.jpg 800w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/adult-blur-city-953207-300x180.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/adult-blur-city-953207-768x462.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/figure>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Quer chegar ao fundo da quest\u00e3o e a melhor forma de o fazer \u00e9 fazer perguntas sinceras que ajudem a perceber como \u00e9 que as coisas chegaram a este ponto.&nbsp;<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">No fundo, o seu parceiro pode sentir-se rejeitado, triste e incompetente, pelo que isto \u00e9 muito importante para o fazer sentir-se ouvido!<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Se houver alguma coisa que possa ter feito para causar isto, pergunte-lhe educadamente. Diga-lhes que lamenta se, inadvertidamente, os levou a reagir desta forma e que deseja melhorar a situa\u00e7\u00e3o.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Pergunte-lhes como se est\u00e3o a sentir e como pode ajudar a aliviar as suas preocupa\u00e7\u00f5es.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">But you have to be genuine and actually care. Otherwise, they\u2019re not going to believe you.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">6. No matter what happens \u2013 don\u2019t lose your cool<\/h2>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"800\" height=\"536\" class=\"wp-image-39780\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/adolescent-converse-all-star-converse-all-star-1021145-2.jpg\" alt=\"6 truques inteligentes para o ajudar a falar com um parceiro demasiado defensivo\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/adolescent-converse-all-star-converse-all-star-1021145-2.jpg 800w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/adolescent-converse-all-star-converse-all-star-1021145-2-300x201.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/adolescent-converse-all-star-converse-all-star-1021145-2-768x515.jpg 768w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/adolescent-converse-all-star-converse-all-star-1021145-2-760x510.jpg 760w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/figure>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Your partner might start listing 100 reasons why he\u2019s right and you\u2019re wrong or he might start blaming you for the whole thing.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Mas o objetivo \u00e9 manter a calma e nunca perder a calma com ele.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Understand that he does not actually mean all that \u2013 he just doesn\u2019t know how to deal with blame and is therefore resorting to hostility.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Mantenha-se calmo e respire fundo. Quando ele vir que conseguiu manter a calma quando ele n\u00e3o se estava a comportar bem, pode come\u00e7ar a abrandar tamb\u00e9m.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">A sua inten\u00e7\u00e3o de resolver o assunto ser\u00e1 clara para ele e obrig\u00e1-lo-\u00e1 a enfrentar o seu sil\u00eancio, a menos que baixe a voz.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Mas lembre-se, pode fazer todas as coisas certas e dizer exatamente o que ele precisa de ouvir, e mesmo assim pode n\u00e3o ser suficiente.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">E isso n\u00e3o \u00e9 da sua responsabilidade. N\u00e3o tem nada a ver com a sua abordagem e tem tudo a ver com a pessoa.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">If he doesn\u2019t want to change, there isn\u2019t much you can do anymore.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">You have to face the fact that sometimes, it just won\u2019t be enough.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">E, nessas alturas, basta afastar-se, respirar fundo e pensar no que quer e na melhor forma de chegar a esse lugar.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"683\" height=\"1024\" class=\"wp-image-39782\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/PINTEREST-2019-07-03T134201.648-683x1024.jpg\" alt=\"6 truques inteligentes para o ajudar a falar com um parceiro demasiado defensivo\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/PINTEREST-2019-07-03T134201.648-683x1024.jpg 683w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/PINTEREST-2019-07-03T134201.648-200x300.jpg 200w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/PINTEREST-2019-07-03T134201.648.jpg 735w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 683px) 100vw, 683px\" \/><\/figure>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>You are in a steady, committed relationship. Your partner makes you genuinely happy and you have stood the test of time. There\u2019s not much you\u2019d change, but there is that one thing\u2026 Whenever he does something that upsets you and whenever there\u2019s something you need to discuss, he gets overly defensive, crosses his arms, and&#8230;<\/p>","protected":false},"author":53,"featured_media":39781,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29614],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-39772","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-love-talks"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29614,"label":"love talks"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/shutterstock_252485488.jpg",800,534,false],"author_info":{"display_name":"Ariel Quinn","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/author\/ariel\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29614,"name":"love talks","slug":"love-talks","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29614,"taxonomy":"category","description":"What is love? How does it affect us? How to know someone loves you or show someone you love them? What types of love are there? Learn all that and much more.","parent":38,"count":426,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29614,"category_count":426,"category_description":"What is love? How does it affect us? How to know someone loves you or show someone you love them? What types of love are there? Learn all that and much more.","cat_name":"love talks","category_nicename":"love-talks","category_parent":38}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/39772","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/53"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=39772"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/39772\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/39781"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=39772"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=39772"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=39772"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}