{"id":48206,"date":"2019-11-20T12:47:38","date_gmt":"2019-11-20T12:47:38","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/herway.net\/?p=48206"},"modified":"2021-08-12T13:21:05","modified_gmt":"2021-08-12T13:21:05","slug":"5-coisas-que-a-minha-relacao-toxica-me-ensinou-sobre-o-amor","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/5-coisas-que-a-minha-relacao-toxica-me-ensinou-sobre-o-amor\/","title":{"rendered":"5 coisas que a minha rela\u00e7\u00e3o t\u00f3xica me ensinou sobre o amor"},"content":{"rendered":"

Quando eu era jovem, conheci um homem. Apaixonei-me loucamente por ele. N\u00e3o via mais ningu\u00e9m para al\u00e9m dele. Ele era o centro do meu universo, ele era o sentido da minha vida. <\/span><\/p>\n

At that time, I thought I hit the jackpot! I had the feeling that I\u2019d never do better than him and that the Universe rewarded me somehow by sending his beautiful tender soul into my life. <\/span><\/p>\n

Oh God\u2026 I thought I had it all. <\/span>
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

But, in the beginning, that wasn\u2019t far from the truth. <\/b><\/p>\n

Abra\u00e7ava-me como uma flor delicada, protegendo-me cuidadosamente do vento e do frio. Esteve ao meu lado em cada passo do caminho. <\/span><\/p>\n

I really thought I was rewarded. I seriously believed he was out of my league. I even felt honored he chose me over a dozen other girls he could\u2019ve had. <\/span><\/p>\n

Isto levantou algumas quest\u00f5es s\u00e9rias sobre mim. <\/span><\/p>\n

The most important thing I didn\u2019t know then but know now, is that I never should\u2019ve felt honored. I never should\u2019ve put him on a pedestal. <\/span><\/p>\n

The reason is simple \u2013 not because he didn\u2019t deserve it, but because I didn\u2019t deserve it. <\/span>
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

Pensava t\u00e3o pouco de mim pr\u00f3pria e n\u00e3o tinha qualquer confian\u00e7a. Eu era, de facto, a \u00fanica pessoa que pensava t\u00e3o pouco de mim. <\/span><\/p>\n

Os outros olhavam para mim como eu devia ter olhado desde o in\u00edcio. Eu devia ter-me amado o suficiente para inverter aquela imagem torta que tinha na minha cabe\u00e7a. <\/span><\/p>\n

Mas deixem-me contar-vos mais sobre ele. <\/b><\/p>\n

He was so charming, funny, and beautiful. I\u2019d never had a man like that. <\/span><\/p>\n

Dado o facto de eu ser bastante jovem na altura, sair com algu\u00e9m um pouco mais velho como ele era um desafio. Francamente, eu estava perdida e n\u00e3o fazia ideia do que estava a fazer. <\/span><\/p>\n

Tive de o seguir porque ele era muito confiante. Ele sabia exatamente o que fazer, quando fazer e como fazer. <\/span><\/p>\n

Quando se v\u00ea um homem t\u00e3o decidido, fica-se hipnotizada e esquece-se completamente de quem se \u00e9 e do que se quer. As necessidades e desejos dele tornam-se os seus. <\/span><\/p>\n

A primeira vez que ele me beijou, senti-me como se estivesse a flutuar num universo intemporal e sem espa\u00e7o. <\/span><\/p>\n

N\u00e3o havia nada \u00e0 minha volta para al\u00e9m desta sensa\u00e7\u00e3o de felicidade incontrol\u00e1vel. N\u00e3o tinha qualquer poder para mexer o meu corpo. <\/span><\/p>\n

I had no control over myself. The only thing I remember was the tingles over every inch of my body and I thought to myself: \u201cLet this feeling last forever!\u201d<\/span>
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

Depois beijou-me a segunda vez e a terceira. As emo\u00e7\u00f5es s\u00f3 se amplificaram at\u00e9 ao estado de \u00eaxtase total, at\u00e9 se estilha\u00e7arem como milh\u00f5es de peda\u00e7os de espelhos partidos no ch\u00e3o. <\/span>
\n<\/span>
\n<\/span>\u201cI can\u2019t be your boyfriend,\u201d he said. <\/b>
\n<\/span>
\n<\/span>I was forced back to reality. The feeling was gone, the happiness was fading. This was the first thing I learned about love\u2026 Stay with me\u2026 Here it goes: <\/span><\/p>\n

1. Ele nunca poderia comprometer-se comigo<\/h2>\n

\"Homem<\/p>\n

Ele n\u00e3o era desse g\u00e9nero. A sua mente de esp\u00edrito livre e a sua alma errante nunca lhe permitiram estabelecer-se com uma s\u00f3 pessoa.<\/span><\/p>\n

Unfortunately, back then, I believed I wasn\u2019t someone special who could capture his heart. <\/span><\/p>\n

Assim, sem sequer perguntar porqu\u00ea ou tentar lutar pelo seu amor, os meus sonhos foram destru\u00eddos e fui apunhalada no cora\u00e7\u00e3o pelo primeiro amor verdadeiro, sem qualquer hip\u00f3tese de sobreviver ao ataque.<\/span><\/p>\n

O homem que eu amava nunca me poderia amar da mesma forma. <\/span><\/p>\n

2. Os sinais de alerta eram \u00f3bvios<\/h2>\n

\"Jovem<\/p>\n

Every future failed relationship has them. You\u2019re only going to recognize them if you leave your options open. I didn\u2019t do that.<\/span><\/p>\n

Acreditei cegamente que ele era o homem certo para mim. Nem por um segundo duvidei da minha decis\u00e3o. Infelizmente, devia ter duvidado. <\/span><\/p>\n

Nada \u00e9 perfeito. A minha rela\u00e7\u00e3o era perfeita para mim, ele era perfeito para mim, e isso devia ter sido o maior sinal de alerta. <\/span><\/p>\n

Remember, please, that no one is perfect \u2013 especially not the man who seems to be flawless. <\/span><\/p>\n

Ignorei as bandeiras de registo e deu-se o desastre. Foi como um duche gelado.<\/span><\/p>\n

From instant crush and endless love, I soon felt disappointment, rejection, and pain\u2026 So. Much. Pain. <\/span><\/p>\n

I know I\u2019m not to blame for not recognizing the signs of danger. I know that mostly no one pays attention to the signs that predict your tears. <\/span><\/p>\n

If it was that easy to see it, there\u2019d be no heartbreak. The harsh truth is that your eyes open when it\u2019s too late. <\/span><\/p>\n

Your eyes open when the wound in your heart won\u2019t stop bleeding. <\/span><\/p>\n

3. Com o seu amor, ele esvaziou-me<\/h2>\n

\"Mulher<\/p>\n

A li\u00e7\u00e3o mais importante que aprendi \u00e9 que n\u00e3o \u00e9 suposto o amor esgotar-nos. <\/span><\/p>\n

When I was with him, I was full, I was happy \u2013 you can even say that I was eccentric. But after being with him and coming home to my \u201creality,\u201d I felt nothing. <\/span>
\n<\/span>
\n<\/span>Nada me podia entusiasmar. N\u00e3o havia ningu\u00e9m neste mundo que me fizesse sorrir como ele. Basicamente, eu era uma mulher s\u00f3 de carne e osso, com um esp\u00edrito a flutuar \u00e0 espera do nosso pr\u00f3ximo encontro.<\/span><\/p>\n

I was just a shadow, a silhouette \u2013 completely emotionless, completely drained. He would bring me to life with our every next meeting. <\/span><\/p>\n

O amor n\u00e3o \u00e9 assim e eu tive de aprender essa li\u00e7\u00e3o da maneira mais dif\u00edcil. <\/span><\/p>\n

4. He kept me at an arm\u2019s length<\/h2>\n

\"Mulher<\/p>\n

O seu plano era perfeito. Sempre que nos encontr\u00e1vamos, ele dava-me o que eu precisava. <\/span><\/p>\n

O que se passa \u00e9 que ele nunca me deu demasiado. Sabia sempre a quantidade exacta de aten\u00e7\u00e3o e cuidado para que eu pudesse voltar para mais. <\/span>
\n<\/span>
\n<\/span>That was the craziest hook I was ever on. It\u2019s like a drug. You try it, you take some more and more and more\u2026 You know it\u2019s bad for you. <\/span><\/p>\n

You\u2019re aware that the path you\u2019re on is leading to disaster, but it\u2019s so good that you don\u2019t care. You just want to go back for more. <\/span><\/p>\n

That\u2019s how he manipulated me. He had me, yet at the same time he didn\u2019t commit to me. <\/span><\/p>\n

That\u2019s the grey zone of relationships that he ruled so well. <\/span><\/p>\n

5. Ele s\u00f3 me tirou a mim<\/h2>\n

\"Pensar<\/p>\n

Love doesn\u2019t only take. Love gives back so much more than you give. That wasn\u2019t the story I was living in. My love only took from me. <\/span><\/p>\n

Every day he\u2019d take as much as he needed and then he\u2019d be gone. <\/span>
\n<\/span>
\n<\/span>I had no idea where he was going and whom he was meeting. But I\u2019m not the suffocating kind. If he wouldn\u2019t tell me, I didn\u2019t ask. <\/span><\/p>\n

That\u2019s called trust, which I sadly gave to the wrong man. <\/span><\/p>\n

Tudo o que eu sentia por dentro, dava-lhe a ele. Quando est\u00e1vamos juntos, ele era a \u00fanica pessoa no mundo para mim. <\/span><\/p>\n

Dar-lhe-ia toda a minha aten\u00e7\u00e3o e cada sentimento que me percorresse seria submetido a ele.<\/span><\/p>\n

Em troca, como j\u00e1 vos disse, fiquei com um vazio. S\u00f3 mais tarde, quando encontrei verdadeiramente o amor da minha vida, \u00e9 que percebi que estava em nega\u00e7\u00e3o durante todo o tempo em que estive com ele.<\/span><\/p>\n

I was delusional, like someone cast a spell on me. My eyes were focused on one thing only \u2013 him \u2013 and unable to see anything else.<\/span><\/p>\n

Termin\u00e1mos a nossa hist\u00f3ria com amizade<\/b>ou o que tamb\u00e9m se pode chamar de falsa amizade. Aquilo que t\u00ednhamos sobreviveu durante mais alguns encontros, mas com o tempo ele esqueceu-se que eu existia. <\/span><\/p>\n

He led me to believe that he loved me, but for some inexplicable reason, couldn\u2019t be with me. Like, it\u2019s too much for him to let me in his life as a whole and for good. <\/span>
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

Por uma raz\u00e3o ainda mais est\u00fapida, na altura, consegui compreender o disparate que ele me estava a vender. <\/span><\/p>\n

Mais uma vez, aceitei alinhar nos seus termos, tal como ele tinha planeado desde o in\u00edcio. <\/span><\/p>\n

I let him do whatever he wanted with me because I was young, naive, and most importantly, I didn\u2019t have the courage to love myself. <\/span><\/p>\n

Desvalorizei-me desde o in\u00edcio, o que fez de mim um alvo perfeito para me divertir. <\/span><\/p>\n

And there you go\u2026 That\u2019s my story of a heartbreak that taught me what true love really is.<\/b><\/p>\n

In a way, I\u2019m glad it happened the way it did. I may have gone through hell, but at least\u2026 I\u2019m happy now.    <\/span><\/p>\n

\"5<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

When I was young, I met a man. I fell madly in love with him. I saw no one else but him. He was the center of my universe, he was the meaning of my life.  At that time, I thought I hit the jackpot! I had the feeling that I\u2019d never do better than…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":20,"featured_media":48214,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29625],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-48206","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-toxic-relationship"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29625,"label":"toxic relationship"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/shutterstock_554782786.jpg",800,534,false],"author_info":{"display_name":"Christine Keller","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/author\/christine\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29625,"name":"toxic relationship","slug":"toxic-relationship","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29625,"taxonomy":"category","description":"Are you in a toxic relationship without even knowing it? What should you do if you find yourself in one? Here's all you need to know!","parent":29620,"count":228,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29625,"category_count":228,"category_description":"Are you in a toxic relationship without even knowing it? What should you do if you find yourself in one? Here's all you need to know!","cat_name":"toxic relationship","category_nicename":"toxic-relationship","category_parent":29620}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/48206","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/20"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=48206"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/48206\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/48214"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=48206"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=48206"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=48206"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}