{"id":51215,"date":"2020-10-14T13:19:35","date_gmt":"2020-10-14T13:19:35","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/herway.net\/?p=51215"},"modified":"2021-08-11T11:18:14","modified_gmt":"2021-08-11T11:18:14","slug":"o-meu-namorado-acabou-comigo-o-que-fazer-a-seguir","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/o-meu-namorado-acabou-comigo-o-que-fazer-a-seguir\/","title":{"rendered":"O meu namorado acabou comigo: O que fazer a seguir?"},"content":{"rendered":"

“My <\/i> o namorado acabou <\/i> with me. What do I do, say, and how do I deal with this?” <\/i><\/p>\n

Se o seu namorado acabou de romper consigo, quero que saiba que compreendo a complexidade das emo\u00e7\u00f5es que sente neste momento.<\/p>\n

I understand your pain and this uncontrollable urge to tell him everything what’s on your mind.<\/p>\n

Compreendo o seu desejo de gritar, berrar e chorar at\u00e9 os seus olhos come\u00e7arem a doer.<\/p>\n

I understand how you feel because I’ve been there, and that’s why I’m sending you my virtual hug (I know when I was feeling this way, even a virtual hug would mean the world to me).<\/p>\n

All you’re able to do is rewind all those happy and less happier moments you had together\u2014your first kiss, first touch, first lovemaking, your first fight, and especially, all the things that happened at the end of the relationship . <\/p>\n

Quando se passa por uma separa\u00e7\u00e3o (especialmente depois de uma rela\u00e7\u00e3o a longo prazo <\/a> ), all you’re able to do is press the rewind button and start searching for all potential red flags (that you somehow missed while in the relationship) and let this feeling of confusion flood every pore.<\/p>\n

And how wouldn’t you? After all, at one point, he meant the world to you, and now, all of a sudden, this world has become just a distant memory. <\/i><\/b><\/p>\n

\"aYou still love him and hate him at the same time, and you can’t decide which of the two feelings you should give permission to prevail.<\/p>\n

Num momento, sentimos que a situa\u00e7\u00e3o \u00e9 totalmente desesperada e que o mundo acabou de acabar diante dos nossos olhos, e no outro momento, sentimos que ainda h\u00e1 algo no ar, algo que n\u00e3o foi dito, algo verdadeiro que precisa de ser trazido de volta \u00e0 vida.<\/p>\n

You feel like there is still a way to make things work, and being intoxicated by this feeling, you subconsciously decide that you will try to fix things by reaching out to him to tell him that he’s making a big mistake and that you’re meant to be together. <\/p>\n

Mas, depois, quando pensamos em todos os cen\u00e1rios e resultados poss\u00edveis, quando dizemos isto, congelamos imediatamente e desistimos s\u00f3 de pensar em faz\u00ea-lo. <\/p>\n

Enviar-lhe mensagens de texto est\u00e1 fora de quest\u00e3o. Persegui-lo nas redes sociais s\u00f3 vai prolongar o seu desgosto. Contactar os amigos \u00edntimos dele ou os vossos amigos em comum far\u00e1 com que pare\u00e7a infeliz.<\/p>\n

Apercebe-se de que n\u00e3o tem escolha, n\u00e3o tem alternativas e n\u00e3o faz ideia de como lidar com tudo isto.<\/p>\n

And that’s how you got here. By typing ” O meu <\/i> o namorado acabou <\/i> comigo <\/i> ” in Google, you subconsciously decided to look for help, which is the first step in dealing with this situation like a boss! <\/p>\n

And I want you to know how glad I am that you did it (because as I’m writing this, my determination and sheer will to help you and make your heartbreak as painless as possible is really strong within me).<\/p>\n

Ent\u00e3o, o que deve fazer a seguir?<\/h2>\n

\"zenA primeira coisa que deve fazer \u00e9 aceitar o facto de ele ter acabado consigo, em vez de o ver como algo totalmente destrutivo.<\/p>\n

Sei que isto pode parecer estranho para si, mas quanto mais cedo o aceitar, mais cedo come\u00e7ar\u00e1 a ver as coisas com mais clareza.<\/p>\n

E compreender as coisas significa, antes de mais, saber como lidar com elas.<\/p>\n

Deixe passar tempo suficiente para pacificar as suas emo\u00e7\u00f5es e ajud\u00e1-lo a aceitar a situa\u00e7\u00e3o (pelo menos com uma metade do seu cora\u00e7\u00e3o partido).<\/p>\n

Depois disso, pode pensar em duas solu\u00e7\u00f5es poss\u00edveis: seguir em frente de vez ou traz\u00ea-lo de volta. <\/b><\/p>\n

I gave you these two possible solutions for a reason because not everyone’s breakup situation is the same.<\/p>\n

Some breakups happen because two people simply weren’t meant to be together. Some breakups happen to teach you a valuable lesson, so you can make things right again. But, one thing is sure.<\/p>\n

His decision to break up with you didn’t happen overnight!<\/h2>\n

\"aI would be mean and unreasonable if I said that he’s the only one to blame. In every relationship, both partners have equal responsibility for the breakup, regardless who proposed going separate ways first. <\/p>\n

There are some things that you’ve said and done when you shouldn’t have, and there are some things that he’s said and done when he shouldn’t have. (And that’s perfectly okay, unless it’s about cheating).<\/p>\n

Estas coisas s\u00e3o grandes ou pequenas, ou totalmente irrelevantes neste momento.<\/p>\n

But in the end, it’s those things that have influenced further growth or stagnation of your relationship. It’s all those little and big things that have led you to this desgosto <\/a> .<\/p>\n

So, his decision to break up with you didn’t happen overnight, but it was there, hovering over your heads for a long time now, and you had a hard time acknowledging it and accepting it.<\/p>\n

You didn’t pay much attention to all those red flags that were right in front of your nose, to all those situations that were destroying your relationship bit by bit.<\/p>\n

You wanted to believe that it will pass, or you decided to continue living with it, believing that it’s not a <\/i><\/b>grande coisa<\/i><\/b>. E depois, quando aconteceu, ficou chocado. <\/i><\/b><\/p>\n

Even though you knew that it would eventually happen, you were still shocked because you simply didn’t expect it. (And who would?)<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"umaEven if he had told you in advance that he might break up with you someday for some reason, you wouldn’t have believed it, and you would definitely not have come prepared for it.<\/p>\n

When the person you’re still in love with tells you that it’s over, there’s nothing you can do but lock yourself in your imaginary safe haven and observe from there, from a safe distance from the real world.<\/p>\n

But, that’s exactly what you shouldn’t do! It’s time you deal with things like the big girl that you are, and I will make sure to help you with everything you need! <\/b><\/p>\n

So, the first part or the first thing we’ll do is go through some possible and most common reasons for why he broke up with you so that you have a clear insight of everything.<\/p>\n

It’s important that you first understand why he broke up with you , and then we will move to the second part where we will go through things that will help you move on or get him back if he’s the right one for you! <\/p>\n

With mutual effort, we will make the best of the situation, and all I want from you is to take a deep breath and promise me that you’ll read everything till the end. Okay?<\/p>\n

Okay, let’s get started!<\/p>\n

PRIMEIRA PARTE: 9 POSS\u00cdVEIS RAZ\u00d5ES PARA ELE TER ACABADO CONSIGO<\/h2>\n

\"aWhen we’re going through a heartbreak , it’s hard to focus on all the possible reasons for why our partner broke up with us in the first place .<\/p>\n

All those draining emotions that you’re going through are blocking your clear thinking and observing the situation you’re in.<\/p>\n

And for that reason, here’s the list of possible and most common reasons for why he broke up with you which will help you understand things better and help you focus on the root of your problem so that you can heal sooner and act accordingly:<\/p>\n

His “feelings” have changed<\/h2>\n

\"umIf someone had given me a dime for every time I\u2019ve heard that famous sentence: “It’s not you, it\u2019s me”<\/b> eu j\u00e1 seria mais rico do que a Oprah.<\/p>\n

Joking aside, but this is exactly what’s going on in the majority of cases when a partner’s feelings all of a sudden change.<\/p>\n

A quest\u00e3o principal \u00e9 saber porque \u00e9 que os sentimentos mudam ao longo de um <\/b>per\u00edodo de tempo<\/b>? O que \u00e9 que faz com que percam a fa\u00edsca inicial e o poder do in\u00edcio da rela\u00e7\u00e3o?<\/b><\/p>\n

E a raz\u00e3o n\u00famero um para que isso aconte\u00e7a \u00e9 cair na rotina, sentir-se demasiado confort\u00e1vel perto um do outro, o que faz com que ambos deixem de se esfor\u00e7ar como costumavam fazer antes.<\/p>\n

Lembra-se de quando se conheceram e passava imenso tempo em frente ao espelho a tentar encontrar a combina\u00e7\u00e3o perfeita para o impressionar? <\/p>\n

E ele provavelmente estava a fazer o mesmo em casa dele antes de a conhecer. Estavam t\u00e3o ansiosos por se impressionarem um ao outro e queriam que tudo fosse o mais perfeito poss\u00edvel.<\/p>\n

E depois, ap\u00f3s algum tempo de rela\u00e7\u00e3o, chega-se a um ponto de total casualidade e deixa-se simplesmente de tentar impressionar o outro.<\/p>\n

When you reach that point, your feelings start changing because you feel that you’re no longer with the same person. You feel as if you’re with someone whom you’ve known for your entire life.<\/p>\n

Aborrece-se de repetir sempre os mesmos exerc\u00edcios, como ver o mesmo programa de televis\u00e3o, comer no mesmo restaurante. Ficamos presos numa rotina sem sequer nos apercebermos disso. <\/p>\n

So, if he told you that famous sentence: \u201cIt’s not you, it’s me\u201d, then you know this is exactly what’s going on.<\/p>\n

A \u00fanica quest\u00e3o \u00e9 se os dois ainda est\u00e3o dispostos a trazer a velha chama de volta \u00e0 vossa rela\u00e7\u00e3o e tentar de novo.<\/p>\n

You aren’t compatible (anymore)<\/h2>\n

\"umComo seres humanos que querem tudo e querem agora (como diz o Rainha <\/i> numa das suas can\u00e7\u00f5es), quando gostamos de algu\u00e9m, o nosso afeto por essa pessoa pode chegar ao ponto de apressar as coisas e saltar demasiado depressa para uma rela\u00e7\u00e3o. <\/p>\n

Quando idolatramos algu\u00e9m, vemo-lo como um ser humano perfeito.<\/p>\n

We instantly forget about all past relationships , and all we want is to jump into a new one and be with the person we’re so crazy about.<\/p>\n

Just because we like them so much, we’re convinced that we’re compatible and that they’re the one for us. Or we jump into a relationship for all the wrong reasons. <\/p>\n

Talvez a sua ex-namorada o tenha deixado h\u00e1 alguns meses e o que ele teve consigo tenha sido apenas uma rela\u00e7\u00e3o de recupera\u00e7\u00e3o.<\/p>\n

Deep down in his heart, he knew that the end will come, but he didn’t know exactly when. <\/p>\n

Quando se entra numa rela\u00e7\u00e3o demasiado depressa ou pela raz\u00e3o errada, o seu fim \u00e9 simplesmente inevit\u00e1vel.<\/p>\n

But, this doesn’t mean that the relationship is totally doomed. If there is love and if there is still effort, things can still change. <\/p>\n

Lembra-te:<\/b> Where there is a will, there is a way! (I recently bought a hoodie with that inscription, and I swear to God, I’ll keep wearing it till the rest of my life to keep reminding myself that anything is possible if you’re determined and if you want it with your heart and not only your mind.)<\/p>\n

Ver tamb\u00e9m: Estar apaixonado pelo seu parceiro n\u00e3o o torna compat\u00edvel <\/a><\/p>\n

Acontecimentos stressantes fora da rela\u00e7\u00e3o<\/h2>\n

\"umEvery single problem in a relationship belongs either to a category called \u2018internal conflicts\u2019 or one named \u2018external conflicts\u2019.<\/p>\n

Os conflitos internos t\u00eam a ver com coisas que acontecem na vossa rela\u00e7\u00e3o, com coisas sobre as quais discutem mais e com coisas que destroem subtilmente o equil\u00edbrio de uma rela\u00e7\u00e3o.<\/p>\n

Mas, se houvesse algum conflito interno, estaria certamente ciente dele.<\/p>\n

External conflicts are stressful events outside the relationship, and many people forget or they’re not familiar with the fact that these stressful events can greatly impact your relationship as well. <\/b><\/p>\n

For example, if your ex has always been working too much without ever asking for a couple of days off (even when he’s feeling sick), if he’s just found a new job that he doesn’t really like that much, if his previous relationship is constantly haunting him (read: if his ex girlfriend is onto him), if he has problems in his family, with his pet, with his friends and similar, he will bring all that negativity and stress into your relationship as well.<\/p>\n

Como resultado, ele n\u00e3o estar\u00e1 interessado em passar uma noite rom\u00e2ntica consigo ou em fazer qualquer coisa consigo.<\/p>\n

Nota-se a falta de contacto, de beijos e de todas as coisas que costumavam fazer antes.<\/p>\n

He no longer showers you with affection because he’s too occupied with other things going on his life and in his head.<\/p>\n

And as a result, you start feeling like you’re not good enough, like he’s not giving you enough attention and avoiding you on purpose.<\/p>\n

A vossa rela\u00e7\u00e3o fica sem vida e sem alma, e \u00e9 ent\u00e3o que ele decide acabar consigo e dizer-lhe que as coisas j\u00e1 n\u00e3o est\u00e3o a funcionar entre os dois.<\/p>\n

(Al\u00e9m disso, esta situa\u00e7\u00e3o tamb\u00e9m poderia ser vice-versa).<\/p>\n

Uma acumula\u00e7\u00e3o de palavras n\u00e3o ditas e desacordos <\/h2>\n

\"oIf you’ve been in a constant disagreement with your ex-boyfriend before he broke up with you and especially if you end things up with a fight, then you know there is some serious amount of accumulated unsaid words, and all the things that were bothering you both on a subconscious level.<\/p>\n

Cada rela\u00e7\u00e3o \u00e9 \u00fanica, mas sabe o que \u00e9 que todas as rela\u00e7\u00f5es t\u00eam em comum? Conflitos. Em todas as rela\u00e7\u00f5es, h\u00e1 alturas em que, por alguma raz\u00e3o, apetece gritar, berrar e literalmente matar-se um ao outro.<\/p>\n

E h\u00e1 alturas em que tudo estar\u00e1 em perfeita ordem.<\/p>\n

E sempre que pensamos em dizer algo ou discutir algo com o nosso parceiro ou vice-versa e decidimos n\u00e3o o fazer, criamos um fosso cada vez maior entre n\u00f3s.<\/p>\n

Todas as palavras n\u00e3o ditas come\u00e7am a acumular-se e, eventualmente, t\u00eam de sair de alguma forma.<\/p>\n

The same thing goes for disagreements. It’s perfectly normal that two people don’t agree on everything, but that doesn’t mean you can’t compromise. <\/p>\n

If you’re both determined to only push your own agenda instead of listening to the other side and trying to find some mutual things that you actually agree on, your relationship becomes filled with toxicity due to unresolved matters. Your relationship ends before he even decided to end it in the first place .<\/p>\n

Ele ficou assustado porque a rela\u00e7\u00e3o est\u00e1 a avan\u00e7ar demasiado depressa<\/h2>\n

\"umWhen a guy ends a relationship before it even starts officially, women often think that it’s because they are afraid to commit.<\/p>\n

They classify the guy as the ultimate commitment-phobe because there’s simply no other logical explanation for what he’s just done.<\/p>\n

Mas, acredita em mim, existe. Em 99,9 % dos casos, quando um gajo decide <\/b>coisas finais<\/b> early on, it’s because he got scared of the fact that the relationship was moving too quickly. <\/b><\/p>\n

Maybe he got scared of your decision to sleep with him on the first date, of you wanting him to introduce you to his family and best friends the next day , demanding that he keeps sending you text messages even when he’s busy, or neglecting your own life only to hang out with your significant other .<\/p>\n

Talvez ele se tenha sentido pressionado por si, porque estava sempre a pression\u00e1-lo para que a acolhesse na sua vida \u00e0 for\u00e7a, em vez de seguir o caminho natural.<\/p>\n

And, because of that, maybe he realized that this new life with you is not something he actually wants or enjoys, and that’s why he decided to replace the title of you being a new girlfriend with one of being an ex girlfriend. <\/p>\n

Pense na primeira vez que se conheceram e na forma como as coisas evolu\u00edram a partir da\u00ed. Pense na \u00faltima vez que falou com ele.<\/p>\n

Ele alguma vez lhe deu uma pista de que sentia que a rela\u00e7\u00e3o estava a avan\u00e7ar demasiado depressa? Se sim, ent\u00e3o sabe que era exatamente isso que estava a acontecer durante todo este tempo.<\/p>\n

Batota<\/h2>\n

\"umThere’s no excuse for cheating. If you cheated on your now ex-boyfriend , then you already know the reason why he broke up with you . <\/p>\n

But, there is also a possibility that he cheated on you, but didn’t tell you. And his guilty conscience haunted him for so long that he needed to do something about it.<\/p>\n

He couldn’t live with the fact that he’s been with another woman, that he lied to you behind your back, and maybe that’s why he was the one to initiate a breakup.<\/p>\n

Agora, <\/b>como saber\u00e1s que ele te traiu?<\/b><\/a>? <\/b><\/p>\n

The most common signs of a partner’s infidelity are excuses like Querida, eu <\/i> didn\u2019t <\/i> fazer <\/i> \u00faltima noite <\/i> , <\/i> semana passada <\/i> , ou <\/i> m\u00eas passado <\/i> porque precisava de ficar mais tempo no trabalho; <\/i> passar tempo em aplica\u00e7\u00f5es de encontros (secretamente); ou estar numa rela\u00e7\u00e3o \u00e0 dist\u00e2ncia (isto aconteceu com a minha amiga e o seu ex-noivo que a tra\u00edram no primeiro ano da sua rela\u00e7\u00e3o). <\/p>\n

In case he really cheated on you, there’s no need to even try to get your ex back or give him a second chance .<\/p>\n

The right decision would be doing the following: the No contact rule , blocking him on Whatsapp and other social networks, and letting go of him for good regardless of whether you’ve been in a 2 year relationship or a 10 year relationship . <\/p>\n

Torn\u00e1-lo na sua \u00fanica prioridade<\/h2>\n

\"oWhen you’re deeply in love with someone, it’s so easy to start focusing only on them and start prioritizing them to the extent of neglecting everyone around you, your hobbies, and things you used to enjoy before. But, relationships can’t function that way.<\/p>\n

When this happens, there’s a huge imbalance in a relationship where one partner is constantly going out of their way to do everything for the other.<\/p>\n

E o outro, como resultado, come\u00e7a a sentir-se encurralado, e rapidamente decidem quebrar o padr\u00e3o, sugerindo uma separa\u00e7\u00e3o.<\/p>\n

If the majority of the time you focused only on his needs, his problems and everything that was going on in his life by neglecting yours completely, then you know you’ve made him your only priority which was not healthy, neither for you nor your relationship.<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n

A longo prazo, isto pode prejudicar seriamente a sua autoestima, ao ponto de perder a sua pr\u00f3pria identidade.<\/p>\n

So, if you suspect this was the case, it’s important that you first work on finding yourself again and then, if you still want, suggest that you try being together again.<\/p>\n

Dizem que, para amar outro ser humano, \u00e9 preciso primeiro aprender a amarmo-nos a n\u00f3s pr\u00f3prios.<\/p>\n

You need to keep maintaining your connections outside your romantic relationship and keep on enjoying things you used to because that’s who you really are, and that’s whom he fell in love with.<\/p>\n

He thinks there’s something better outside the relationship<\/h2>\n

\"um\u00c9 tamb\u00e9m conhecido como A s\u00edndrome da relva mais verde <\/i> . It’s when you think that there’s always something better than what you already have. It’s when you think that you would be happier with someone else than with the person you’re with at the moment.<\/p>\n

And maybe that’s what your ex thought as well. Maybe the reason why he broke up with you is because he constantly thought that there’s something better outside your relationship.<\/p>\n

This happens a lot, and in most cases, it happens to men who are not that experienced. They have this constant anxiety that they’re missing something out there.<\/p>\n

But, this is not a valid excuse for sure. There’s no way you can tame a man or be with a man who is constantly on the lookout for something better, greater.<\/p>\n

You don’t want to turn into an overly controlling woman whose main priority is stalking her boyfriend. <\/p>\n

You want to unfriend him on all social networks, keep living your best life, and let him aimlessly continue searching for “perfection”.<\/p>\n

And I can assure you that he’ll never find what he’s looking for because he himself has no idea what he really wants. <\/p>\n

Even if he was with a Victoria Secrets model in a relationship, he would still think that there’s something better.<\/p>\n

It’s a serious issue, and it takes a lot of time to deal with this syndrome. It takes a lot of practice and time for one to learn to appreciate what they already have.<\/p>\n

Ver tamb\u00e9m: 10 sinais da s\u00edndrome de que a relva \u00e9 mais verde e como super\u00e1-la <\/a><\/p>\n

Rela\u00e7\u00e3o \u00e0 dist\u00e2ncia<\/h2>\n

\"oOu talvez a raz\u00e3o pela qual o teu namorado acabou contigo \u00e9 porque estavas numa rela\u00e7\u00e3o \u00e0 dist\u00e2ncia <\/a> durante algum tempo.<\/p>\n

Isto significa mais mensagens de texto e menos comunica\u00e7\u00e3o de qualidade em pessoa, mais tempo passado nas redes sociais, que \u00e9 o principal culpado de todas as potenciais explos\u00f5es de ci\u00fames, e tudo isto significa o enfraquecimento das vossas liga\u00e7\u00f5es emocionais e f\u00edsicas. <\/p>\n

Com base na minha experi\u00eancia pessoal e na experi\u00eancia de pessoas que me s\u00e3o pr\u00f3ximas, posso afirmar com toda a certeza que n\u00e3o s\u00e3o muitas as pessoas que conseguem ultrapassar os desafios das rela\u00e7\u00f5es \u00e0 dist\u00e2ncia.<\/p>\n

A maior parte das vezes, acaba por ser o desejo de ter uma rela\u00e7\u00e3o normal com algu\u00e9m que se possa ver mais vezes e que se possa sentir ao lado. <\/p>\n

That’s why, most of the time, a long-distance relationship results in infidelity.<\/p>\n

And this has nothing to do with how strong your love is. It’s mostly a question of your character and personality.<\/p>\n

For example, if you’re an extrovert, you will naturally be inclined to go out more often and to search for other connections which may result in completely forgetting what you already have and focusing on what you can have at the place where you are at the moment. <\/p>\n

But, there’s no need to worry because this doesn’t have to be true in your case.<\/p>\n

Talvez a vossa rela\u00e7\u00e3o \u00e0 dist\u00e2ncia tenha expirado naturalmente e a \u00fanica coisa que podem fazer \u00e9 seguir caminhos separados.<\/p>\n

Perhaps your boyfriend couldn’t endure it any longer, and he decided that splitting up is the best decision for the both of you.<\/p>\n

PARTE DOIS: O MEU NAMORADO ACABOU COMIGO: O QUE FAZER A SEGUIR?<\/h2>\n

\"umaNow that we’ve gone through the possible reasons why your boyfriend broke up with you, it’s time to focus on what you will do next! This part will cover the main things you should focus on if you want to move on for good, or if you want to get him back. It will also cover some things that you should never do, no matter how much you want to reunite with your ex.<\/p>\n

Ready? Let’s get started!<\/p>\n

If you want to move on, you should…<\/p>\n

Concentre-se em descobrir quem \u00e9 sem ele<\/h2>\n

\"oDepois de uma separa\u00e7\u00e3o, a primeira coisa essencial que tem de fazer por si pr\u00f3pria \u00e9 concentrar-se em descobrir quem \u00e9 sem ele.<\/p>\n

When you’re in a relationship (especially for a long time), you lose a part of yourself because you were solely focused on maintaining and fighting for what you have with your loved one.<\/p>\n

Deixamos de fazer coisas de que gost\u00e1vamos. Compromete-se muito.<\/p>\n

You become more focused on your partner’s happiness than your own. And now is the perfect time to change that. <\/p>\n

Agora \u00e9 a altura ideal para reencontrar a sua paix\u00e3o interior, para encontrar um novo passatempo, para se comprometer consigo pr\u00f3prio e com as pessoas que significam muito para si.<\/p>\n

Now is the perfect time to spoil yourself with long, bubble baths; with your favorite cake, TV show or a drink. Don’t let him define your being\u2014think about who you truly are without him.<\/p>\n

Desta forma, ser\u00e1 mais f\u00e1cil curar-se do desgosto e \u00e9 tamb\u00e9m a base perfeita para uma rela\u00e7\u00e3o saud\u00e1vel, caso decidam voltar a juntar-se.<\/p>\n

Pense no que quer para si<\/h2>\n

\"aEm vez de pensar apenas na sua rela\u00e7\u00e3o falhada e em tudo o que poderia ter tido no futuro, pense no que quer para si.<\/p>\n

Em vez de pensar apenas nessa frase: My boyfriend broke up with me and I don\u2019t know what to do <\/i> , ask yourself whether you really want to be in a relationship with someone who clearly, for some reason, doesn’t want the same thing?<\/p>\n

Do you want to continue being in a relationship that is not reciprocal? If your answer is \u2018no\u2019, then you’re ready to move on.<\/p>\n

E deixe de pensar que a culpa do fracasso da sua rela\u00e7\u00e3o \u00e9 apenas sua.<\/p>\n

Parem de pensar que se tivessem feito algo diferente, ainda estariam juntos.<\/p>\n

Even if you cheated on him, your decision to do so didn’t happen overnight.<\/p>\n

Ambos s\u00e3o respons\u00e1veis por isso. Seja qual for a raz\u00e3o, lembre-se que todas as pequenas coisas que aconteceram na vossa rela\u00e7\u00e3o, de ambas as partes, contribu\u00edram para que ele decidisse acabar com tudo. <\/p>\n

Quando a sua mente absorver tudo isto, tornar-se-\u00e1 livre e come\u00e7ar\u00e1 a pensar mais claramente sobre o que quer para si, em vez de pensar apenas no seu passado.<\/p>\n

Fa\u00e7a uma lista de prioridades para a sua nova vida<\/h2>\n

\"aIf you want to move on, it’s essential that you make a list of priorities for your new life .<\/p>\n

Escreva algumas coisas que quer alcan\u00e7ar num futuro pr\u00f3ximo. Se quer finalmente aprender a tocar aquele instrumento, escreva-o.<\/p>\n

If you want to focus on improving your connection with other people that you didn’t have time for lately, write it down.<\/p>\n

Se quiser concentrar-se na sua carreira, escreva-o. Se quer dedicar o seu tempo aos seus novos passatempos, escreva-o.<\/p>\n

It’s important that you set the goals you want to achieve because that will prevent you from constantly thinking only about your ex.<\/p>\n

It will help you move on faster because when you’re fully focused on things that matter to you in life, you become the best version of yourself.<\/p>\n

You become fulfilled, and you certainly don’t have time to think about texting your ex or liking his pictures on social media .<\/p>\n

And if someday in the future, you happen to reunite for some reason, it will be easier to maintain a healthy relationship when you’ve already set your priorities. <\/p>\n

A regra de n\u00e3o contacto<\/h2>\n

\"umI’m pretty sure you’re all familiar with the no contact rule .<\/p>\n

It basically means cutting all contact with your ex\u2014blocking him on social media , not calling or texting him, not seeing him, and deleting his number if needed. <\/p>\n

The no contact rule needs to be applied ASAP after a breakup because the sooner you cut all contact, the sooner you’ll heal and move on.<\/p>\n

Esta regra foi inventada para o ajudar a limpar-se de toda a negatividade acumulada na sua rela\u00e7\u00e3o e para o ajudar a ver as coisas com mais clareza. <\/p>\n

Afinal de contas, sabe o que se diz: “Far from the eyes, far from the heart” <\/i> .<\/p>\n

Ver tamb\u00e9m: L\u00ea isto sempre que te apetecer enviar-lhe uma mensagem, mesmo sabendo que n\u00e3o o deves fazer <\/a><\/p>\n

Evita tudo o que te faz lembrar dele<\/h2>\n

\"umaSe quer esquec\u00ea-lo e seguir em frente em tempo recorde, tem de evitar rigorosamente tudo o que lhe fa\u00e7a lembrar dele.<\/p>\n

This includes things that he’s given you for your birthday and all the other gifts, going to the same restaurant you went to with him, going for a walk along the same route you went with him, and so on.<\/p>\n

If you don’t want to discard everything he’s given to you, just put it in a bag and hide it somewhere in the house until you recover from your breakup and until those things start to mean nothing to you.<\/p>\n

Ficaria surpreendido com a facilidade com que o c\u00e9rebro humano se desliga de coisas que costumavam significar muito para uma pessoa. <\/p>\n

Por exemplo, ainda tenho algumas roupas do meu ex que uso regularmente e raramente penso nele quando as uso.<\/p>\n

J\u00e1 n\u00e3o relaciono essas roupas com a pessoa por quem estava apaixonada, mas sim com algu\u00e9m que j\u00e1 fez parte da minha vida, mas que agora \u00e9 apenas uma mem\u00f3ria distante.<\/p>\n

Deixar de falar dele a outras pessoas <\/h2>\n

\"aO erro n\u00famero um que muitas pessoas cometem depois de uma separa\u00e7\u00e3o \u00e9 falar constantemente sobre o seu ex aos amigos ou pessoas pr\u00f3ximas.<\/p>\n

Pensam que se continuarem a falar sobre as coisas que aconteceram na rela\u00e7\u00e3o ou sobre o facto de o parceiro ter sido um grande idiota, v\u00e3o, de alguma forma, curar-se magicamente de toda a dor que sentem.<\/p>\n

But, this will only do the opposite. The longer you mention your ex\u2019s name and the longer you talk about him to other people, the longer you’ll feel miserable, and it will be impossible for you to move on.<\/p>\n

It doesn’t matter if you’re mentioning his name in a positive or negative connotation because as long as he’s on your mind, you will not be able to think clearly and to do the right thing.<\/p>\n

So, when you’re spending time with your friends, talk about all the fun things that you used to do before instead and make plans for the future.<\/p>\n

Falem da vida, riam das coisas que est\u00e3o na moda, falem de tudo, mas n\u00e3o falem do vosso ex.<\/p>\n

No caso de o encontrar, mantenha a calma e siga em frente<\/h2>\n

\"conjuntosEste \u00e9 um dos maiores pesadelos para todas as pessoas que querem esquecer o seu ex. Passam muito tempo a pensar no que diriam ou fariam no caso de o encontrarem.<\/p>\n

They start thinking about tons of possible case scenarios, but they can’t decide which one they prefer most.<\/p>\n

If you’re one of those people, forget about all of it. In case you run into your ex, the only thing you need to remember is to stay calm and move on.<\/p>\n

Do not succumb to temptation to tell him everything that’s on your mind, to yell at him, let alone to start crying in front of him.<\/p>\n

You don’t want to show him your weaknesses, and you don’t want him to think that you’re still crazy about him and that you’ll do anything just to reunite with him (even if all of this is true).<\/p>\n

You need to focus on moving on because you owe it to yourself, and that’s why you should take a deep breath, stay calm, say a few words if you must and move on.<\/p>\n

Ver tamb\u00e9m: Se voltares para ele (sabendo que n\u00e3o o deves fazer), isto \u00e9 o que vai acontecer <\/a><\/p>\n

Repetir todas as ac\u00e7\u00f5es anteriores at\u00e9 que algo mude<\/h2>\n

\"aMuitas pessoas pensam que, se fizerem tudo o que foi dito acima, v\u00e3o esquecer o seu ex amanh\u00e3 ou na pr\u00f3xima semana. Mas n\u00e3o \u00e9 assim que as coisas funcionam.<\/p>\n

I won’t lie to you. There will be moments when you will want to contact your ex, when you will want to do anything just to reach him even though you know you shouldn’t.<\/p>\n

There will be times when you will want to give up on trying to move on because it won’t be easy.<\/p>\n

Vai ser dif\u00edcil, mas sempre que tiver vontade de desistir ou sempre que sentir que estas coisas n\u00e3o est\u00e3o a funcionar, continue a faz\u00ea-las at\u00e9 come\u00e7ar a ver resultados.<\/p>\n

Continue a repetir tudo o que foi dito at\u00e9 que algo mude, porque, acredite, vai mudar.<\/p>\n

Por muito confuso e desesperado que esteja neste momento, um dia, num futuro pr\u00f3ximo, vai acordar e aperceber-se de que j\u00e1 n\u00e3o pensa no seu ex. <\/p>\n

And until that day comes, you mustn’t give up, and you mustn’t think that you’re too weak to follow your own path.<\/p>\n

You’re a strong, independent woman, and you can do whatever the hell you want, only if you want to! Don’t ever forget that.<\/p>\n

If you want him back, you should…<\/h2>\n

\"aSe decidir que quer voltar a estar com ele e que o quer de volta, tem de fazer exatamente o mesmo que faria se quisesse seguir em frente. <\/p>\n

\u00c9 preciso fazer tudo da mesma maneira, porque quando se aplicam estas oito regras, h\u00e1 dois resultados poss\u00edveis: Ou o esqueces e segues em frente, ou ele vai acabar por te contactar<\/b> .<\/p>\n

And sometimes these two outcomes come in one package, and it’s up to you whether you want to delete him from your life permanently or try again. <\/p>\n

O meu humilde conselho \u00e9 que s\u00f3 deve considerar a hip\u00f3tese de voltar a estar com ele se ainda tiver sentimentos fortes por ele, se acreditar que o lugar dos dois \u00e9 juntos e que vai conseguir fazer as coisas bem. <\/p>\n

Depois de aplicar estas oito regras, estar\u00e1 pronta para come\u00e7ar um novo cap\u00edtulo, com ou sem ele, o que \u00e9 essencial quando se trata de estabelecer uma rela\u00e7\u00e3o saud\u00e1vel e feliz ou de continuar a viver a sua melhor vida a solo.<\/p>\n

O QUE NUNCA SE DEVE FAZER?<\/h2>\n

\"umaSe a vontade de contactar o seu ex se tornar incontrol\u00e1vel, deve lembrar-se do seguinte: Nunca deve tentar convencer o seu ex a ficar consigo! <\/b> Porqu\u00ea?<\/p>\n

Porque isso \u00e9 a pior coisa que podes fazer. Isso vai prejudic\u00e1-la e torn\u00e1-lo ainda mais distante.<\/p>\n

E se precisar de mais raz\u00f5es, aqui est\u00e3o algumas coisas que o seu ex pode pensar de si se tentar convenc\u00ea-lo a ficar consigo:<\/p>\n

Ele vai pensar em si como ego\u00edsta e infantil<\/h2>\n

\"oSe estiver constantemente a telefonar-lhe ou a enviar-lhe mensagens de texto com o objetivo de o convencer a mudar de ideias e a voltar para si, ele vai consider\u00e1-la ego\u00edsta e infantil.<\/p>\n

He will think of you as selfish or childish because you don’t think about how he feels about everything and the reasons why he did that in the first place . <\/p>\n

It will look like the only one you’re thinking about is yourself and how you will feel once you reunite again. And you don’t want that.<\/p>\n

You don’t want to be that kind of woman because it’s both toxic for your well-being, and it will not bring you anything good. <\/p>\n

Ele ter\u00e1 medo de mudar de ideias<\/h2>\n

\"oSe continuar a persegui-lo e a tentar convenc\u00ea-lo a ficar consigo, far\u00e1 com que ele tenha medo de mudar de ideias, pois saber\u00e1 que, se alguma vez decidir deix\u00e1-la novamente, isso acontecer\u00e1.<\/p>\n

Ele ter\u00e1 medo de que a sua rela\u00e7\u00e3o volte a perder a cabe\u00e7a quando terminar naturalmente ou se algo de mau acontecer.<\/p>\n

E ningu\u00e9m gosta de se sentir for\u00e7ado a fazer algo s\u00f3 porque algu\u00e9m quer que o fa\u00e7am.<\/p>\n

Tem de o deixar decidir por si pr\u00f3prio se quer ou n\u00e3o voltar para si.<\/p>\n

N\u00e3o lhe dar\u00e1s espa\u00e7o e tempo suficientes para sentir a tua falta<\/h2>\n

\"umTentar convencer o seu ex-namorado a ficar consigo significa n\u00e3o lhe dar espa\u00e7o e tempo suficientes para sentir a sua falta.<\/p>\n

And that’s the main reason why you need to apply those eight rules above. <\/p>\n

After a breakup, it’s essential that you give yourself enough time to think about what happened, to find yourself again, and to give him space and time as well to do the same.<\/p>\n

Depois disso, tudo ser\u00e1 diferente para ambos e saber\u00e3o o que fazer a seguir.<\/p>\n

O que \u00e9 preciso fazer \u00e9 deixar que as coisas aconte\u00e7am ao seu ritmo natural! <\/h2>\n

\"aApply those eight rules and wait to see the results. If you’ve decided with all of your body and heart that you’re moving on then, don’t stop practising those rules until you finally succeed.<\/p>\n

If you still want him back (for the right reasons), then give him some space and time to see that you’re a different woman and that you’re perfectly capable of being on your own.<\/p>\n

And if he decides to reach you, don’t jump on him like he’s the only man in the world. <\/p>\n

Continue a nutrir o seu <\/b>vida pr\u00f3pria<\/b> and keep being the strong woman that you are. If he recognizes it, then you know he’s the right man for you. <\/b><\/p>\n

Se ele concordar em fazer um esfor\u00e7o m\u00fatuo, alimentar o respeito m\u00fatuo e lutar desinteressadamente para trazer a fa\u00edsca de volta \u00e0 vossa rela\u00e7\u00e3o, ent\u00e3o sabe que reatar com ele foi a coisa certa a fazer!<\/p>\n

Seja qual for a vossa escolha, desejo-vos muita sorte (e muita paci\u00eancia)!<\/p>\n

Ver tamb\u00e9m: A regra das tr\u00eas semanas de separa\u00e7\u00e3o que deve seguir <\/a><\/p>\n

\"O<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

“My boyfriend broke up with me. What do I do, say, and how do I deal with this?” If your boyfriend just broke up with you, I want you to know that I understand the complexity of emotions that you feel at the moment. I understand your pain and this uncontrollable urge to tell him…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":13,"featured_media":120774,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29628],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-51215","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-dealing-with-breakup"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29628,"label":"dealing with breakup"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/01\/My-Boyfriend-Broke-Up-With-Me-What-To-Do-Next-1024x684.jpg",1024,684,true],"author_info":{"display_name":"April Callaghan","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/author\/april\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29628,"name":"dealing with breakup","slug":"dealing-with-breakup","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29628,"taxonomy":"category","description":"Breakups are painful but worry not; you don't need to go through all of it alone. If you need advice on when and how to break up, you'll find it all here.\r\n","parent":29627,"count":263,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29628,"category_count":263,"category_description":"Breakups are painful but worry not; you don't need to go through all of it alone. If you need advice on when and how to break up, you'll find it all here.\r\n","cat_name":"dealing with breakup","category_nicename":"dealing-with-breakup","category_parent":29627}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/51215","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/13"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=51215"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/51215\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/120774"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=51215"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=51215"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=51215"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}