{"id":54016,"date":"2020-03-03T10:52:27","date_gmt":"2020-03-03T10:52:27","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/herway.net\/?p=54016"},"modified":"2021-08-12T10:15:46","modified_gmt":"2021-08-12T10:15:46","slug":"ser-filha-de-um-alcoolico","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/ser-filha-de-um-alcoolico\/","title":{"rendered":"Ser filha de um alco\u00f3lico deixou-me de rastos, mas tamb\u00e9m me tornou mais forte"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong>Quando tinha apenas 6 anos de idade, senti a dor pela primeira vez.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m not talking about any kind of pain like when a small child falls and cries\u2014I\u2019m talking about real pain.<\/p>\n<p>The pain you feel when someone abandons you or when someone just doesn\u2019t care about you.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Quando tinha 7 anos, invejava as outras crian\u00e7as.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I wasn\u2019t jealous of their clothes or perfect pencils, their shiny, pink Barbie bags or glitter stickers\u2014I was jealous because of their true happiness.<\/p>\n<p><em>Tinha ci\u00fames de cada vez que corriam para o pai quando ele os vinha buscar \u00e0 escola.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-54026 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/worried-girl-watching-outside-on-windows.jpg\" alt=\"rapariga preocupada a observar o exterior nas janelas\" width=\"800\" height=\"532\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/worried-girl-watching-outside-on-windows.jpg 800w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/worried-girl-watching-outside-on-windows-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/worried-girl-watching-outside-on-windows-768x511.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>I envied every hug they got and every \u2018tap\u2019 on their shoulder when they got A for their homework.<\/p>\n<p>I was jealous of their freedom and how they didn\u2019t have to pretend that everything was fine\u2014because for them, it was.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Quando tinha 9 anos, vi o meu pai b\u00eabedo pela primeira vez.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Lembro-me que pensei que era sumo de ma\u00e7\u00e3.<\/p>\n<p>D\u00e1vamos longos passeios e depois \u00edamos a um bar qualquer; ele dizia sempre que precisava de descansar e pedia uma cerveja.<\/p>\n<p>I don\u2019t know why but I always thought he was drinking apple juice.<\/p>\n<figure id=\"attachment_54027\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-54027\" style=\"width: 800px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-54027 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/worried-woman-sitting-and-holding-her-head-at-home.jpg\" alt=\"mulher preocupada sentada e a segurar a cabe\u00e7a em casa\" width=\"800\" height=\"531\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/worried-woman-sitting-and-holding-her-head-at-home.jpg 800w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/worried-woman-sitting-and-holding-her-head-at-home-300x199.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/worried-woman-sitting-and-holding-her-head-at-home-768x510.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-54027\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Ser filha de um alco\u00f3lico deixou-me de rastos, mas tamb\u00e9m me tornou mais forte<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p><em>Eu queria beber o mesmo que ele, por isso ele pedia-me um sumo de ma\u00e7\u00e3 e s\u00f3 de estar ali sentada ao lado dele e de o beber, sentia-me feliz.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>Quando eu tinha 10 anos, o meu pai gritou comigo.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Come\u00e7ou a chegar a casa muito tarde.<\/p>\n<p>Os nossos passeios j\u00e1 n\u00e3o eram interessantes para ele, por isso substituiu-me por pessoas estranhas, altas e com barbas compridas.<\/p>\n<p>I couldn\u2019t understand my mother but I felt her pain.<\/p>\n<p>Estava escondido durante o dia mas, \u00e0 noite, espalhou-se como um v\u00edrus. Todos n\u00f3s o sentimos.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-54076 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/worried-woman-sitting-in-bed-by-window.jpg\" alt=\"mulher preocupada sentada na cama junto \u00e0 janela\" width=\"800\" height=\"543\"><\/p>\n<p>Em nossa casa, as noites eram vivas e cheias de brigas, palavras e gritos dos meus pais.<\/p>\n<p>O meu pai chegava a casa \u00e0s 4 da manh\u00e3, b\u00eabedo, desarrumado e sujo, e acendia a luz do corredor, certificando-se de que todos n\u00f3s sab\u00edamos que ele estava em casa.<\/p>\n<p>Era suposto estarmos nas nossas camas, a fingir que est\u00e1vamos a dormir.<\/p>\n<p>Mas naquela noite de fevereiro, acordei e fui \u00e0 casa de banho. Eram 4 da manh\u00e3 e as luzes estavam acesas.<\/p>\n<p><em>Gritou comigo por n\u00e3o estar na minha cama, sem saber que a raiva nos seus olhos criaria uma imagem dele no meu c\u00e9rebro que eu levaria para sempre comigo.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-54024 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/thinking-woman-sitting-in-bus-and-watching-throught-window.jpg\" alt=\"mulher pensativa sentada no autocarro e a olhar pela janela\" width=\"800\" height=\"534\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/thinking-woman-sitting-in-bus-and-watching-throught-window.jpg 800w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/thinking-woman-sitting-in-bus-and-watching-throught-window-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/thinking-woman-sitting-in-bus-and-watching-throught-window-768x513.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/p>\n<p><strong>Quando eu tinha 14 anos, o meu pai deixou-nos pela terceira vez.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>A sua partida foi sempre incerta, tal como a sua mente.<\/p>\n<p>We never knew what he would do next but one thing is for sure\u2014we got used to him leaving.<\/p>\n<p>He never said, \u201cGoodbye,\u201d when he was leaving. Sometimes, he left when I wasn\u2019t even home.<\/p>\n<p>Desta vez, estava a falar-lhe de como estava feliz por ir para o liceu; ele olhou-me diretamente nos olhos e apertou-me a m\u00e3o.<\/p>\n<p>That\u2019s how I knew I wasn\u2019t going to see him for a very long time.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-54023 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/worried-woman-sitting-in-front-of-window.jpg\" alt=\"mulher preocupada sentada em frente \u00e0 janela\" width=\"800\" height=\"534\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/worried-woman-sitting-in-front-of-window.jpg 800w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/worried-woman-sitting-in-front-of-window-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/worried-woman-sitting-in-front-of-window-768x513.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/p>\n<p><strong>Quando tinha 19 anos, apercebi-me de como sou forte.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>In all the pain, my father taught me one thing\u2014to cherish moments, even those that you think are not important.<\/p>\n<p>Nunca se sabe quando \u00e9 que a presen\u00e7a de algu\u00e9m nos vai ser retirada.<\/p>\n<p>O facto de n\u00e3o ter o meu pai na minha vida fez-me perceber e ver tudo o que eu tinha.<\/p>\n<p>Tornava tudo e todos na minha vida t\u00e3o importantes.<\/p>\n<p>I cherished every moment of every day that I got to spend with my mom and my brothers\u2014and I still do.<\/p>\n<p>Sou muito sens\u00edvel e protetor em rela\u00e7\u00e3o a eles.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-54077 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/standing-confidece-woman-in-bussines-outfit.jpg\" alt=\"mulher de p\u00e9 a fazer confid\u00eancias com roupa de neg\u00f3cios\" width=\"800\" height=\"534\"><\/p>\n<p>A dor ensinou-me a bondade, a humildade e o cuidado.<\/p>\n<p>Ensinou-me a estar grato por tudo o que tenho.<\/p>\n<p><strong>It taught me that you can\u2019t choose a family member, nor can you change them. <\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>You can\u2019t control every move or choice someone makes.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><em>You can\u2019t make yourself hate someone when you don\u2019t.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>A batalha que criei dentro de mim, entre a dor e o amor, encontrou sempre uma forma de me iluminar.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-54078 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/outside-smiling-woman-standing-on-sun.jpg\" alt=\"mulher sorridente no exterior, de p\u00e9 ao sol\" width=\"800\" height=\"534\"><\/p>\n<p>Tornou-me forte, humilde e gentil, quando eu s\u00f3 queria ser jovem.<\/p>\n<p>I went to college and I didn\u2019t know anyone there.<\/p>\n<p>I was so alone and the one person I couldn\u2019t stop thinking about was my father.<\/p>\n<p>A sua aus\u00eancia magoou-me muito, criou problemas de confian\u00e7a e um muro emocional que eu tinha sempre que algu\u00e9m tentava contactar-me.<\/p>\n<p>I didn\u2019t have a lot of boyfriends and I didn\u2019t know how to love someone, even though I tried.<\/p>\n<p><em>Mas aprendi a amar-me e a cuidar de mim.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-54021 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/strong-woman-with-hands-up-to-the-sky.jpg\" alt=\"mulher forte com as m\u00e3os levantadas para o c\u00e9u\" width=\"800\" height=\"534\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/strong-woman-with-hands-up-to-the-sky.jpg 800w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/strong-woman-with-hands-up-to-the-sky-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/strong-woman-with-hands-up-to-the-sky-768x513.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m forever grateful for that.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Quando tiver os meus pr\u00f3prios filhos, vou ensinar-lhes o que significa realmente o perd\u00e3o.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Sei que se diz que as mulheres devem olhar para o pai quando procuram o homem com quem passar a vida.<\/p>\n<p>But I don\u2019t believe in \u2018looking\u2019 or \u2018searching\u2019.<\/p>\n<p>Acredito na f\u00e9 e que, um dia, algu\u00e9m especial me vai segurar na m\u00e3o enquanto agrade\u00e7o ao meu pai por me ter feito ultrapassar todo o drama e dor.<\/p>\n<p>Deixarei que a minha pessoa especial me olhe nos olhos e me aperte a m\u00e3o, sabendo que ele vai ficar.<\/p>\n<p>One day, when I have my own children and when they are old enough, I will tell them that forgiveness is not saying, \u201cI forgive you.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>O perd\u00e3o \u00e9 um processo. Leva tempo e, por vezes, dura uma vida inteira.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-54020 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/woman-on-mountain-feeling-strong.jpg\" alt=\"mulher na montanha a sentir-se forte\" width=\"800\" height=\"532\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/woman-on-mountain-feeling-strong.jpg 800w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/woman-on-mountain-feeling-strong-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/woman-on-mountain-feeling-strong-768x511.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/p>\n<p><em>Perdoar n\u00e3o \u00e9 escolher entre coisas e pessoas ou ter medo de perder tudo. <\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>Forgiveness is the strength to pick yourself up and move on. It\u2019s holding the hand of darkness while knowing that your heart is light.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Now, I can\u2019t imagine my life without moments that break me down but they only taught me how to pick myself up and be stronger than ever.<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m filled with love and patience; that\u2019s all I have for the people around me.<\/p>\n<p>H\u00e1 pensamentos positivos e h\u00e1 compaix\u00e3o e amor incondicional em mim por todas as pessoas com quem perdi o contacto, que me magoaram ou que me deixaram.<\/p>\n<p>Espero que algures no mundo, o meu pai saiba disto.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-54074 size-large\" src=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/Being-The-Daughter-Of-An-Alcoholic-Broke-Me-But-It-Also-Made-Me-Stronge-Pinterest-724x1024.jpg\" alt=\"Ser filha de um alco\u00f3lico deixou-me de rastos, mas tamb\u00e9m me tornou mais forte \" width=\"724\" height=\"1024\" srcset=\"https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/Being-The-Daughter-Of-An-Alcoholic-Broke-Me-But-It-Also-Made-Me-Stronge-Pinterest-724x1024.jpg 724w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/Being-The-Daughter-Of-An-Alcoholic-Broke-Me-But-It-Also-Made-Me-Stronge-Pinterest-212x300.jpg 212w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/Being-The-Daughter-Of-An-Alcoholic-Broke-Me-But-It-Also-Made-Me-Stronge-Pinterest-768x1086.jpg 768w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/Being-The-Daughter-Of-An-Alcoholic-Broke-Me-But-It-Also-Made-Me-Stronge-Pinterest-1086x1536.jpg 1086w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/Being-The-Daughter-Of-An-Alcoholic-Broke-Me-But-It-Also-Made-Me-Stronge-Pinterest-1448x2048.jpg 1448w, https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/Being-The-Daughter-Of-An-Alcoholic-Broke-Me-But-It-Also-Made-Me-Stronge-Pinterest.jpg 1587w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 724px) 100vw, 724px\" \/><\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>When I was just 6 years old, I felt the pain for the first time. I\u2019m not talking about any kind of pain like when a small child falls and cries\u2014I\u2019m talking about real pain. The pain you feel when someone abandons you or when someone just doesn\u2019t care about you. When I was 7&#8230;<\/p>","protected":false},"author":20,"featured_media":54236,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29625],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-54016","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-toxic-relationship"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29625,"label":"toxic relationship"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/BEING-THE-DAUGHTER-OF-AN-ALCOHOLIC-BROKE-ME-BUT-IT-ALSO-MADE-ME-STRONGER.jpg",800,534,false],"author_info":{"display_name":"Christine Keller","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/author\/christine\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29625,"name":"toxic relationship","slug":"toxic-relationship","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29625,"taxonomy":"category","description":"Are you in a toxic relationship without even knowing it? What should you do if you find yourself in one? Here's all you need to know!","parent":29620,"count":228,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29625,"category_count":228,"category_description":"Are you in a toxic relationship without even knowing it? What should you do if you find yourself in one? Here's all you need to know!","cat_name":"toxic relationship","category_nicename":"toxic-relationship","category_parent":29620}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/54016","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/20"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=54016"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/54016\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/54236"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=54016"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=54016"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=54016"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}