{"id":7969,"date":"2020-04-03T14:21:41","date_gmt":"2020-04-03T14:21:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/herway.net\/?p=7969"},"modified":"2021-08-11T09:22:54","modified_gmt":"2021-08-11T09:22:54","slug":"7-coisas-que-acontecem-quando-um-bom-rapaz-sobrevive-a-um-abuso-emocional","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/7-coisas-que-acontecem-quando-um-bom-rapaz-sobrevive-a-um-abuso-emocional\/","title":{"rendered":"7 coisas que acontecem quando se conhece um bom rapaz depois de sobreviver a um abuso emocional"},"content":{"rendered":"

Apaixonarmo-nos depois de algu\u00e9m nos ter destru\u00eddo desta forma pode ser uma batalha dif\u00edcil.<\/p>\n

You really want to love again and you want to open your heart to the one who loves you, but you just can\u2019t.<\/p>\n

You\u2019re too scared that you will go through the same old story again.<\/p>\n

You\u2019re terrified of being dragged into emotional abuse because you know it\u2019s almost impossible to get out.<\/p>\n

You\u2019ve been there and you didn\u2019t even realize what he was doing to you.<\/p>\n

\"mulher<\/p>\n

Pensavas que era assim que devia ser. Pensavas que as rela\u00e7\u00f5es funcionavam assim.<\/p>\n

Achava que ele tinha raz\u00e3o ao dizer que era o culpado de tudo o que estava mal.<\/p>\n

E tu come\u00e7aste mesmo a acreditar nisso. Absorveu as mentiras dele como se fossem as coisas mais sinceras que algu\u00e9m j\u00e1 lhe tinha dito. <\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

Ele tinha o poder de nos fazer acreditar em tudo o que queria. <\/strong><\/em>It\u2019s not your fault, though. Don\u2019t blame yourself for believing his lies.<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t blame yourself <\/a>por n\u00e3o ter visto mais cedo o que realmente estava a acontecer. N\u00e3o havia qualquer hip\u00f3tese de o ter previsto.<\/p>\n

\"mulher<\/p>\n

Even if you did, even if you knew what was going on, you couldn\u2019t break free that easily.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

Mentia a si pr\u00f3pria dizendo que ele iria mudar, que era apenas uma fase.<\/p>\n

E terias raz\u00e3o, porque ele teve fases em que era o melhor homem que poderias desejar.<\/p>\n

His behavior was hot \u2018n\u2019 cold. He twisted you around his little finger and you responded the way he wanted you to respond. That\u2019s called being a manipulative bastard.<\/p>\n

You couldn\u2019t leave just like that.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

There is something addictive in these relationships. Even though you wanted out, you somehow stayed. It\u2019s like you couldn\u2019t leave him, like something was pulling you back to him.<\/p>\n

\"mulher<\/p>\n

Well, it wasn\u2019t love for sure, it was an addiction. You are well aware that if you had left, you would have been alone.<\/p>\n

E, de uma forma um pouco retorcida, queria ficar com ele porque ele lhe dava seguran\u00e7a.<\/p>\n

Estar numa rela\u00e7\u00e3o com ele era algo que se conhecia, algo que era familiar.<\/p>\n

And due to that emotional state he had put you in, you didn\u2019t want to leave for the unknown or leave this relationship.<\/p>\n

O mais importante de tudo \u00e9 o facto de ter tido medo.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

Tinha medo de o deixar<\/a>, you were scared for your life. He threatened you, not just once, and you really didn\u2019t have the courage to take the next step and leave.<\/p>\n

\"mulher<\/p>\n

Se tivesse de tomar uma decis\u00e3o, preferia ter estado numa rela\u00e7\u00e3o abusiva a libertar-se dela, porque tinha medo dele e do que ele lhe poderia fazer.<\/p>\n

But, in the end, he brought you to the point where you didn\u2019t even care for your own life anymore.<\/strong> <\/em><\/p>\n

You didn\u2019t care if you were going to live or die, as long as this suffering was over, so you left.<\/p>\n

De alguma forma, encontrou aquela coragem extra que tinha escondida algures no seu \u00edntimo e utilizou-a.<\/p>\n

Not because you knew you were strong and you were going to use that strength to escape, but because you didn\u2019t care anymore for anything, not even yourself.<\/p>\n

Nesse processo de n\u00e3o dar a m\u00ednima, cresceste. Encontraste acidentalmente essa for\u00e7a e usaste-a e percebeste que valias alguma coisa.<\/p>\n

\"jovem<\/p>\n

Percebeu que era forte e que era capaz de controlar a sua pr\u00f3pria vida. Now that you\u2019re gone from his abusive grip, you are collecting yourself.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

You\u2019re picking up your broken pieces – not the pieces of your heart, but the pieces of your soul and your mind, too.<\/p>\n

But that doesn\u2019t matter to you so much because you are finally at peace and maybe even ready to love again.<\/p>\n

And loving someone else after what you\u2019ve been through is not an easy game.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

You\u2019ll have to take a lot of challenges and you\u2019ll have to face things which make you shiver, things that you are still afraid of.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

Julga-se a si pr\u00f3prio com demasiada severidade<\/h2>\n

\"mulher<\/p>\n

You have to understand that it\u2019s not your fault for going through all of this. N\u00e3o ganhar\u00e1 nada em julgar-se a si pr\u00f3prio<\/a> and asking yourself why you didn\u2019t escape earlier.<\/p>\n

O que acontece \u00e9 que, muitas vezes, as pessoas tratam-nos como n\u00f3s nos tratamos a n\u00f3s pr\u00f3prios. Por isso, enquanto se culpar por tudo o que lhe aconteceu, as pessoas v\u00e3o ver isso.<\/p>\n

They will sense that you don\u2019t respect or love yourself and no one will be able to love you back.<\/p>\n

Quando nos tratamos mal, estamos a abandonar-nos a n\u00f3s pr\u00f3prios. \u00c9 preciso aprender a evitar fazer isso.<\/p>\n

Quando o fizer, atrair\u00e1 outras pessoas amorosas e de confian\u00e7a.<\/p>\n

Tens de o deixar falar contigo<\/h2>\n

\"mulher<\/p>\n

Talking is an essential key to every happy relationship. It\u2019s impossible to develop trust if you don\u2019t talk to each other.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s important to let him know what you\u2019ve been through.<\/p>\n

Let him know you\u2019re still healing and that you\u2019re scared of opening your heart to him – you\u2019re scared of getting hurt again.<\/p>\n

Explique-lhe como se sentia na sua rela\u00e7\u00e3o abusiva. Diga-lhe que a sua autoestima est\u00e1 quase a desaparecer e que precisa de tempo para poder confiar em qualquer pessoa, incluindo ele.<\/p>\n

Tem medo de ser enganado<\/h2>\n

\"mulher<\/p>\n

This is something you\u2019ve experienced on a daily basis. He made you believe in things that never happened.<\/p>\n

Ele fazia-nos acreditar que \u00e9ramos loucos. Este \u00e9 um exemplo cl\u00e1ssico de manipula\u00e7\u00e3o<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Agora, acha que a mesma coisa est\u00e1 a acontecer com este novo tipo.<\/p>\n

If you\u2019re scared that you are about to experience the same old thing, don\u2019t shut down. Talk to him, explain how you\u2019re feeling.<\/p>\n

Diz-lhe o que o \u00faltimo homem com quem andaste a sair te fez. Diz-lhe como ele te fez sentir.<\/p>\n

Tell him you\u2019re scared he is doing the same thing as the last one. Don\u2019t assume you\u2019re being paranoid.<\/p>\n

Respond to your worries and face him. If he shows empathy, and if he listens to your problems, you\u2019ve got nothing to be afraid of.<\/p>\n

Analisa demasiado as coisas<\/h2>\n

\"mulher<\/p>\n

Duvidar\u00e1s de tudo o que ele faz. Ele vai tratar-te como tu realmente mereces e isso vai ser demasiado estranho para ti. N\u00e3o est\u00e1 habituada a ser tratada dessa forma.<\/p>\n

N\u00e3o est\u00e1 habituado a receber uma mensagem de bom dia ou a receber flores no seu local de trabalho. N\u00e3o est\u00e1 habituado a uma visita surpresa s\u00f3 para saber como est\u00e1.<\/p>\n

You\u2019ll probably think he\u2019s smothering you or that he\u2019s being too pushy and you\u2019re going to back down and shut him out to analyze why he is doing all of these things for you.<\/p>\n

Is he trying to lure you into his trap only to show his real face later on? You\u2019ll have a ton of questions like this, but stay focused.<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t let your bad experience ruin your chance for happiness.<\/p>\n

Pedir desculpa a toda a hora<\/h2>\n

\"casal<\/p>\n

Aquele que te iluminou ensinou-te a fazer isso. Ele transformou-te num perfeito, pequeno e obediente fantoche. Tudo era culpa tua e tinhas de o admitir.<\/p>\n

You had to admit you were the one to blame or all hell would break loose. So, you apologized for things you did and didn\u2019t do to protect yourself.<\/p>\n

You\u2019re doing the same thing all over again, but this time you don\u2019t have to do it. He doesn\u2019t want you to apologize all the time.<\/p>\n

He is telling you it\u2019s not your fault and that it\u2019s okay.<\/p>\n

You can\u2019t accept he\u2019s real<\/h2>\n

\"mulher<\/p>\n

You think he\u2019s too good to be true. You are afraid that he is putting on a show only to impress you and gain your trust.<\/p>\n

Tens tanto medo que ele baixe a m\u00e1scara e revele a sua verdadeira face quando lhe mostrares o caminho para o teu cora\u00e7\u00e3o.<\/p>\n

You can\u2019t shake the feeling that something bad is going to happen any minute now.<\/p>\n

Tem-se a sensa\u00e7\u00e3o de estar a viver num conto de fadas <\/a>porque nunca sonharam em ser tratados e amados assim.<\/p>\n

And you know what, you are living in a fairy tale. You finally got your happy ending. Don\u2019t feel guilty though because you deserved one.<\/p>\n

Deixar que os novos sentimentos tomem conta<\/h2>\n

\"mulher<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t fight these strange, new feelings that are consuming you. Embrace them, because they are something you\u2019ll be feeling for the rest of your life.<\/p>\n

\u00c9 assim que o verdadeiro amor se parece. \u00c9 assim que se sente.<\/p>\n

Deixa-te ir. Deixa-o amar-te porque tu mereces.<\/p>\n

\"7<\/p>\n

\"7<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Falling in love after someone destroyed you like this can be an uphill battle. You really want to love again and you want to open your heart to the one who loves you, but you just can\u2019t. You\u2019re too scared that you will go through the same old story again. You\u2019re terrified of being dragged…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":21,"featured_media":81200,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29632],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-7969","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-abuse-and-trauma"],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":29632,"label":"abuse & trauma"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/herway.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/7-Things-That-Happen-When-You-Meet-A-Good-Guy-After-Surviving-An-Emotional-Abuse.jpg",800,534,false],"author_info":{"display_name":"Maria Parker","author_link":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/author\/maria\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":29632,"name":"abuse & trauma","slug":"abuse-and-trauma","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":29632,"taxonomy":"category","description":"Learn the signs of emotional and physical abuse and how to protect yourself from toxic patterns in relationships with your partner, friends or family.","parent":22911,"count":138,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":29632,"category_count":138,"category_description":"Learn the signs of emotional and physical abuse and how to protect yourself from toxic patterns in relationships with your partner, friends or family.","cat_name":"abuse & trauma","category_nicename":"abuse-and-trauma","category_parent":22911}],"tag_info":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7969","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/21"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7969"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7969\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/81200"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7969"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7969"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/herway.net\/pt\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7969"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}