“Anxiety is love’s greatest killer. It makes others feel as you might when a drowning man holds on to you. You want to save him, but you know he will strangle you with his panic.”~Anais Nin
It’s like being trapped in a well. Everywhere around you it’s dark, and you are standing in knee-high water. You can’t fall asleep because if you do, you’ll drown. And you can’t do anything about it.
That’s anxiety. It traps you and it holds you its captive. And you can’t do anything about it. You can try to escape, but it’s a never-ending battle. It lasts for your whole life.
Anxiety becomes you. You can scream for hours in that deep well but no one will hear you. You will just have to manage and try to make it on your own—try to survive.
Because of that feeling, we have our guard up all the time. We are always worried, and we second-guess everything. And when the people who don’t get what anxiety is do even one wrong move, we feel like we are in that deep well, once again.
Girls with anxiety love differently. We have to love differently because we are different. But our love is the one that will last. Our love is the one that is pure. Once we feel we can trust you, we will let you into our hearts. And we’re going to let you stay there forever.
You will be the one who is honored to be loved by a girl with anxiety—differently.
1. We need to feel safe
We need a safe space. We are independent. Don’t get me wrong, we are. But it’s just that in those moments when we are at our lowest, we need someone to feel safe with. Even when we are out, we hate situations which are out of our comfort zone.
So, we need you. We need you to be our safety net and to protect us from the things we are scared of. You don’t even have to protect us. Being there is enough.
2. We are guarded
We guard our hearts. We are scared we will be hurt, and our anxiety makes us believe that the person we are with will hurt us sooner or later.
3. We have trust issues
It takes a long time for us to actually trust someone completely. We do this because our anxiety is always making us cautious. It makes us imagine things that are not there. We want to trust them but the anxiety takes the better of us.
4. We need to be sure
We need that feeling of safety. We need to know that you aren’t going anywhere. Whenever we ask you to confirm and prove your love for us, it’s not because we are second-guessing you.
It’s because we cannot control our anxiety which makes us doubt even things which we are the most positive about. The feeling of knowing everything is fine and that you are by our side gives us calmness. That’s all we need.
5. We need you close
Every time our anxiety hits, it takes us to dark places. It takes us to depression and sadness. Whenever that happens, we need to know that you are by our side. And if you are, we’ll never let you go.
You are the one who sees us at our worst and when we are the most vulnerable. And if you stick around even after that, we will be yours forever.
6. We isolate ourselves
We pull away because our anxiety makes us want to be alone. It makes us close up and build a huge unbreakable wall around us. This is even worse when we are falling in love because of all the trust issues we have. Our anxiety then is at its highest.
7. We will love you in our unique way, forever
We can be a handful, I know. But, we are devoted because we respect and value the fact you found the way and strength to love us. We know it’s hard, and you did it. That means your love is really worth something.
We love you because you are the one who loves us even when we question you. You are the one who never gives up. You are our protector and our safe harbor in a stormy night.
We will never let you feel that you are unloved. Even when we suffer the most, when anxiety gets the worst of us, we will never stop showing you how much we love you.
Anxiety is real. It consumes you. It takes control over your body and mind. That’s why we freak out at the smallest problem. That’s why we get scared to face the smallest obstacle.
We will give you our hearts, and we will put our faith in you.
If you hurt us, we will never be able to love anyone that way ever again.