“It is both a blessing and a curse to feel everything so very deeply.” David Jones
And it truly is both a curse and a blessing. Feeling deep can make your emotions run wild. You can be extremely happy at times. But, you can also be the saddest person alive at other times.
Feeling deep makes you care too much about everyone in your life. The problem is that people take advantage of it. Your friends, boyfriend, ex-boyfriend or sometimes even your family take advantage of your kind nature. They all know that you are the one who cares and who will be there for them at any time, no matter what, night and day.
You will be the first person your friend is going to call when they have a fight with their boyfriend or girlfriend. You are there when they are having a bad day at work. Or when they are panicking about this and that. You are a shoulder to cry on no matter the situation.
You are a good listener. You don’t listen to have answers. You listen to understand. So, when you are in a relationship, you are the one who carries all the burden. Even when you are out of the relationship, your ex has the need to share things with you. He knows you are the only one who will give a shit about his problems, so he takes advantage of it.
You listen. You understand. You offer advice. You give support. You are there. You would feel bad if you weren’t there for any of them.
But, who is there for you?
When everything goes downhill you realize you are there standing all alone. You’ve been there for so many people and now, when you need it the most, nobody’s there. Maybe it’s not that they don’t care, it’s just they don’t know how to return everything you’ve been giving to them. It’s not that you were expecting it back, but it would be nice to have someone to at least stand by you when you are going through a rough patch.
That doesn’t stop you from caring too much. That’s all you know and you are ready to give your all to make other people better and happier.
You often feel like caring too much is going to be the death of you. Being so empathetic and compassionate is not easy. Sure, it’s easy to share the happiness, the difficult thing is sharing the pain. It drains you emotionally and leaves you feeling numb and empty. You feel the pain of other people almost like your own.
The bad thing is that when it comes to you, you no longer have the energy for yourself. You feel tired. You have had your share of grief, loss, and loneliness. It makes you feel like your life is on standby and you are living it for others. In spite of all of that you still love, you still care and you still feel because it makes you ‘you’.
Don’t let the hardship change you. Caring too much doesn’t make you weak, it gives you strength, even when you feel like you no longer have it in you. It will all be worth it someday because girls like you don’t come around so often. You will find someone who admires everything you stand for.
The only thing you have to remember to do is take better care of yourself. In the end, we all can only rely on ourselves. It’s nice that you care for other people but you have to let them learn how to take care of themselves.
You can’t constantly be there for their needs and disregard your own. Keep some of that energy you give to others for yourself. By taking care of yourself you will do more good to you and to others. Don’t think that’s selfish – it’s necessary.