Como manter uma conversa com um homem: 15 maneiras infalíveis

You’ve finally started a thing with the guy you’ve been into for a while and you booked yourself a primeiro encontro!

You’ve been mensagens de texto para trás e para a frente e através redes sociais, you’ve been having a grande conversa.

It all seems potentially promising, but you’re going to be meeting him for the primeira vez cara a cara and you’re dreading the potential constrangimento.

Deseja poder continuar a ter um conversa interessante – a witty mensagem de texto is one thing, but what if he’s not a natural conversador?

E se o conversa goes south and you realize you’re not exactly in possession of grande capacidade de conversação também?

Através de conversação por texto, he seems like a worthy candidate, but what if in reality he doesn’t have a sentido de humor? You couldn’t live with that.

E se ele tiver zero temas interessantes para discutir e que dá vontade de se ir embora em 10 minutos? 

You’d rather let the wormhole eat you up than share an silêncio constrangedor mais uma vez. 

Não poder ter um boa conversa é um fator de desempate. If he can’t give you that, you’re going to have a tempo difícil concordar com um segundo encontro!

So now, you’re trying to figure out if there’s a way to keep the conversa em curso e evitar o mais possível os temidos silêncios. Mensagens de texto é fixe e tudo, mas será que ele consegue acompanhar cara a cara?

God knows you can’t handle another shitty date, so you’d rather avoid dating altogether than suffer through another horrible blind date.

Those days are behind you and it’s time to find a good guy worthy of your precious time.

Good thing you’re here, then! Once you’re done reading this, the only problem you’ll be having is how to make yourself paragem falar quando se encontrarem! 

(And that’s a good problem to have.)

Como manter uma conversa com um homem?

It’s only natural to be a little anxious when meeting a guy you like, especially for the primeira vez. Quer o química textual to translate to real life and there’s nothing wrong with that.

But it’s also important to realize that cara a cara conversation is much more challenging, so you shouldn’t put so much pressure on yourself.

This is a person who likes you just as much as you like him and he’s probably dreading the very same things!

E ambos estão ansiosos por causar a melhor primeira impressão possível, o que coloca uma pressão enorme sobre ambos.

So my first piece of advice would be to relax and stop taking this too seriously or you’ll drive yourself mad.

This is not that complicated. If you click, you click, and if you don’t, there are no iniciadores de conversa que poderia salvar um tipo de química zero.

But while you figure out if you’re vibing or not, there are plenty of formas excelentes para dar uma verdadeira oportunidade.

And today, I’m going to be your own personal guide in helping you get your vida própria e fazer com que esse homem se sinta atraído por si em pouco tempo.

Há algumas coisas muito fixes perguntas abertas pode começar por ajudar a que a conversa flua naturalmente.

Pode sempre namoriscar innocently as you’re talking and distract him with your gorgeous looks.

Contacto visual é crucial para manter o conversa em curso (juntamente com linguagem corporal, but we’ll get into that later), as well as having a novo tópico to fall on if the first one doesn’t do the trick.

A ausência de pressão e uma mente aberta são uma combinação poderosa.

Don’t expect to become melhores amigos turned lovers within hours. Chemistry takes time. If you’re both vibing textually, let it happen organically when you’re cara a cara.

Here’s how you can ease the atmosphere once you meet up, and keep the conversa em curso de forma totalmente natural e eficaz, apenas com o perguntas correctas. Tomar um respiração profunda e relaxar. Cá vamos nós.

1. Don’t force it if there’s no conversational chemistry

Primeira regra de como manter um conversa em curso with a guy is to NOT force it if you’re not clicking and the vibe is off.

Remember. you’re not going to click with everybody you meet and that’s the most normal thing to expect.

Just like you’re not friends with every single person that has ever entered your life, you’re not going to find what you’re looking for in every guy you meet.

If the conversation keeps falling flat, you’re not feeling his vibe AT ALL, and the constrangimento could eat you alive, there’s honestly no resurrecting it from the dead.

Finish up the date, be polite, and excuse yourself as fast as you can. If you’re not feeling it, it’s not supposed to be. 

Uma simples conversa não deveria exigir tanto esforço.

Claro, há sempre um pouco de silêncio constrangedor as you’re breaking the ice, but eventually it’s supposed to get going and become easier as you go along.

If there’s absolutely nothing to go on, save yourself the trouble and call it a night.

2. Estar genuinamente interessado em conhecê-lo

Don’t go into this wanting to make it all about you. You have to understand that this guy has dreams, ambitions, and hobbies you’re not necessarily going to be into, but that shouldn’t stop you from getting to know him.

You have to be interested in all aspects of him if you want to make it work and vice versa! So what if he’s insanely obsessed with jogos de vídeo, you have your hobbies too that I’m SURE wouldn’t be his cup of tea.

Que ele conquistá-lo com as suas palavras e encoraje-o a dizer-lhe o que o faz querer levantar-se todas as manhãs. Conheça o gajo. Descubra o que o faz vibrar e quais são os seus coisa favorita no mundo é!

That’s the basis of any grande conversa. Deixe que a outra pessoa partilhe abertamente e esteja pronto para participar na conversa se espera que ela retribua.

Deixem-no falar-vos da sua equipa favorita (basketball or football, it doesn’t really matter) and talk about your filmes favoritos! And before you know it, you’ll be in a deep conversation completely smitten with each other.

3. Ouvir para compreender, NÃO para responder

Este é um aspeto fundamental em qualquer boa conversa. As pessoas estão tão ocupadas à espera da sua vez de falar que só ouvem para responder, em vez de ouvirem para obterem informações reais sobre a pessoa.

Don’t be that girl. Don’t just sit around, waiting for your turn to talk.

Listen to him when he’s talking about something and always use the phrase ”tdizer-me mais” to make him feel like he’s not talking to a wall.

People need to feel like they’re being paid attention to.

Imagine how you’d feel if you were opening your soul to a person and all he does is nod his head and as soon as you’re finished he starts blurting out something about himself.

I’m sure that would make you feel so low and unappreciated. So make sure to never do that to a guy.

Listen, engage, and participate. That way, it’ll go both ways.

4. Perguntar-lhe sobre as suas coisas favoritas

You know how you just can’t shut your mouth when someone asks you about that one thing you’re deeply passionate about?

It just excites you too much and there’s so much you want to share!

O mesmo se aplica ao seu primeiro encontro com esse rapaz. Deixe que a conversa a leve a um lugar onde ele se sinta totalmente à vontade para partilhar as suas paixões consigo e deixe-o contar-lhe tudo.

Firstly, it’s going to make him so happy to talk about something he genuinely loves. And secondly, it’s going to be so enjoyable listening to a guy you like talk about something with such joy and zest.

It’s definitely going to make you apaixonar-se por ele muito mais fácil! 

E, ao fazê-lo, a conversa vai simplesmente fluir como um rio.

You can exchange your dreams and share your experiences while encouraging the other person to feel relaxed sharing this with you, knowing you’re realmente tão interessado.

5. Don’t let the occasional silence discourage you

Sim, há vontade haver momentos ocasionais de silêncio constrangedor, It happens. It’s your primeiro encontro and you’re literally just getting to know each other. Don’t expect miracles on your first try.

You’re not robots and at some point, the conversation is going to come to its natural end and you’ll be scratching your head for a few seconds in panic.

Mas adivinha o que mais? Isso doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with the guy or that you should give up. It means that you’re human and you’re only starting up something together.

There will be bumps in the road and little hiccups now and again, but if the vibe is right and the guy is nice to be around, you’re not going to throw in the towel.

As the days go by and you’re getting more emotionally attached, it’s going to feel SO much easier filling in those pesky silent moments.

You just have to grow into it, like every couple does. It’s normal and if you’re really feeling this guy, keep working on it and don’t give up just when it’s started.

6. Repetir a última coisa que ele disse

Here’s a cool tip on how to keep a conversa em curso with a guy. If you’re struggling to find a new tema interessante para falar, basta repetir a última coisa que ele disse!

If he’s talking about some crazy adventures he was on or a dangerous hobby he loves so much, repeat the last sentence as if in disbelief.

He’s going to respond with a little smile on his face and expand on the topic. It’s such a silly thing but it works. It makes the guy feel like the man and it gives you a chance to come up with something interesting to say next.

This will him give him a push that he needs and make him feel like you’re not bored with his stories.

7. Perguntar-lhe sobre o seu passado familiar

Get to know him by asking about his childhood memories. But don’t pry too much. See if he’s willing to open up about it and if so, ask him about what he remembers from when he was young and what his upbringing was like.

Ele tem irmãos? São próximos e o que é que gostam de fazer quando se encontram? Vivem longe e é difícil estar separado deles?

This will make him feel nostalgic and eager to share because who doesn’t get emotional and happy to share family stories about the people closest to him in the world?

Isto manterá o conversa em curso so smoothly that you’ll forget you’re on a primeiro encontro and feel like you’ve known him for a while.

And when it starts feeling so homey and comfy being around him, you just know you’re with a bom rapaz.

8. O que é que ele faz e se isso o satisfaz?

What does he do for a living? Is it something he dreamed of since he was a kid or was it a job he needed in order to pay the bills while he’s searching for something more in his lane?

Sempre que a conversa começar a flutuar, pode perguntar-lhe sobre o trabalho! Praticamente todas as pessoas adultas têm um emprego e provavelmente um milhão de histórias que poderiam contar sobre todas as suas experiências relacionadas com o trabalho.

Ask him about his favorite project he’s worked on and the one he hated the most. Does he have funny work anecdotes? Perhaps a funny colleague he does a perfect imitation of?

Maybe he’s the fun guy at the office who keeps the atmosphere light and joyful so you can ask him about his secrets.

Bottom line – there are a million and one work-related things you can discuss. After all, your job takes up half of your day! Surely, there are plenty of things to talk about there.

9. Partilhar as suas próprias histórias 

It’s a good start getting the guy to talk about him and his dreams in life. But don’t neglect yourself! He also wants to know everything about you so be prepared to open up as well.

Mantenha a conversa calorosa e agradável, partilhando anedotas leves e divertidas e histórias da sua vida.

Tell him about your family, friends, and workplace. Share your awkward moments that will make you both laugh and let him know you don’t take life too seriously.

Be light and fun and don’t be afraid to make fun of yourself. That’s what guys look for in a girl.

Alguém com a sentido de humor que conseguem rir-se de si próprios sem levar nada a peito.

Life’s an adventure and there’s no point being serious all the time.

A grande conversa nasce de anedotas divertidas e estranhas que libertam toda a pressão e fazem com que a outra pessoa se sinta suficientemente confortável para partilhar as suas próprias anedotas.

10. Convide-o com a sua linguagem corporal

Linguagem corporal é tão importante como as palavras que saem da sua boca. Se parecer desinteressada e fechada, o rapaz vai sentir-se rejeitado.

But there’s a simple solution there, too. For starters, don’t cross your arms as you’re talking as it feels like you’re being defensive and judgmental.

Rather keep your arms on your legs or in an open position where anything he says feels like it’s being received openly. 

Secondly, don’t be looking around the room as he’s sharing a story.

Manter-se direito contacto visual (but don’t forget to blink, girl!) and make him see you’re there. Smile every now and then (nothing forced) and keep a relaxed posture.

This is not a job interview, you’re on a date with a guy you really like, so act like it.

It’s supposed to be chill and relaxed, so don’t give him the 20 questions treatment and let him talk as you’re carefully listening and looking him in the eye.

11. Deixar um ar de mistério

Don’t be too available too soon. Let the man querer conhecer-te mais e mais cada vez que te vê.

It’s good to share, but always leave a little something to the imagination. That way, he’ll keep coming back for more.

He needs to see that you’re an intriguing enigma that keeps on giving, but if he wants to know more, he’d better make an effort to get you to share.

It’s supposed to be a little playful situation where you both win. You keep him hooked with your flirtatious stories and competências de conversação, mas deixando sempre espaço para mais.

That’s an excelente forma para que ele tenha uma noção de si e da sua personalidade peculiar e sedutora que o atrairá.

12. Evitar temas sensíveis numa fase inicial

Se quiser saber como manter um conversa em curso com um homem, deixem-me dizer-vos a primeira coisa a NÃO fazer.

Don’t get into sensitive subjects way too soon (ex-namorados, money, politics… you name it) and you’ll be well on your way.

People don’t want to hear all about your sad breakup story on your primeiro encontro.

And this guy certainly didn’t invite you to dinner (or his place) to discuss politics and get into a heated discussion in case your views clash.

So scratch all that and keep it light, warm, and fun. That’s what the first few dates should be all about!

Getting to know each other and testing out the air. Seeing if there’s a click and if so, deepening your chemistry and having a good time together while your relationship progresses.

Tais assuntos (os já referidos) are for later on when you’ve established what you are and already have that type of relationship where you can discutir assuntos controversos sem que isso afecte a vossa relação.

13. Don’t complain

A pior coisa que pode fazer é levá-lo a pensar que se pode queixar de tudo.

É essa a primeira impressão que queres deixar? Em vez de encontrarem algo para se queixarem, encontrem coisas em que possam concordar e encontrem um terreno comum.

Deixe as coisas mais pesadas para mais tarde. Esta é a sua única oportunidade de causar a melhor impressão, por isso use-a com sabedoria.

I’m talking from my own experience. Guys are truly put off by negativity and bitchiness. Leave him discover that side of you once you’re knee-deep in your relationship.

Be mindful of your habit of judging stuff you don’t really get. Be open-minded as opposed to judgy and critical.

The guy will not want to go on a second date if you’re nagging about all kinds of stuff.

It’s unappealing and you’re better than that. It’s all about light topics, positive vibes, and fun banter!

14. Fazer-lhe perguntas divertidas e estimulantes

Pretend you live in a world where anything you wanted could become reality! Now ask him about the things he’d choose if he had a say in every single thing that happens from then on.

Por exemplo, se ele pudesse escolher qualquer lugar na Terra para se teletransportar agora mesmo, para onde iria e porquê?

Se ele pudesse fazer de qualquer celebridade sua melhor amigo, quem seria? Se ele pudesse, mudaria alguma coisa em si próprio?

What’s the one food he’d have every single day delivered to his door if he could?

Está a perceber a ideia. Viva num mundo de fantasia e descubra tudo sobre o que ele gosta e não gosta, as suas preferências e as coisas que o desmotivam.

De certa forma, isto dir-lhe-á tudo o que precisa de saber sobre ele. Experimenta!

15. Fazer um elogio

Everyone likes to hear a nice thing about themself, that’s just a fact, and guys aren’t immune to this. Just because they act as if they don’t care to be complimented, it doesn’t make it true.

Tendo isso em mente, encontre uma coisa genuína para o elogiar, e faça-o de uma forma orgânica e não forçada.

If when you’re talking, you notice how his dimples get so visible when he gives you an honest smile, tell him that!

He’s going to blush a bit, but he’ll be pleased to hear a compliment, especially about something he can’t even control!

E isto pode ser um ótimo início de conversa if you need one. Even if you’re mensagens de textopode sempre partilhar um elogio genuíno e fazer com que o rapaz sentir-se tão bem sobre si próprio.

Os elogios nunca passam de moda e ajudam sempre a manter a conversa em curso. So keep that in mind next time you need a trick up your sleeve. It’s simple, kind, and very effective in disarming a person.

Considerações finais

Encontrar um bom rapaz com quem formar uma relação estável, madura e divertida é trabalho suficiente por si só.

Mas encontrar uma maneira de manter o conversa em curso durante os primeiros encontros é um jogo completamente diferente.

Por vezes, os nervos levam a melhor e ficamos paralisados.

Other times, you’re so eager to say so much that you end up talking all over yourself and making zero sense.

And it’s all perfectly normal – expected even. So many women around the globe go through the exact same thing every single day.

And I’m here to wash away your worries and make you see that you’ve got this!

I’ve collected some of the most effective things you can take into consideration if you truly want to know how to keep a conversa em curso com um gajo.

There are so many options out there, that I truly believe the only problem you’ll have is having too much fun exploring all these tips!

Dating should be light and fun, so always keep it that way. It’s not a job and nobody is grading you.

You’re there to find a guy who’ll compliment your quirky side and balance you out with his mild demeanor.

Try out these 15 awesome ideas and see for yourself that dating isn’t as bad as you have it pictured in your head!

It’ll be a fun ride, but not without its bumps in the road. So remember, just because it isn’t smooth sailing, it doesn’t mean it isn’t right.

As melhores coisas da vida exigem esforço, tempo e paciência.