Listen, we love the macaroni necklaces and the scribbled cards. We love our kids. But you — our partner, co-parent, emotional teammate — you have a different kind of power on Mother’s Day.
And while we might not say it (because we’re tired, or don’t want to seem demanding), here are 17 things moms secretly wish you’d do to make us feel seen, celebrated, and not like the default planner of our own “special day.”
This list isn’t about spa days and jewelry boxes. It’s about feeling known, appreciated, and—just for one day—not responsible for making magic happen for everyone else.
So, if you’ve ever wondered what we’re really hoping for when Mother’s Day rolls around, pour yourself a coffee and settle in. Let’s spill the real tea on how to make this Mother’s Day unforgettable.
1. Plan Something—Without Making Us Decide
Ever wish you could read our minds? Dia da Mãe is your shot. Instead of asking, “So, what do you want to do?”—just choose something. It doesn’t have to be fancy. A casual brunch, a hike, or even a picnic in the backyard works. What matters is that you put in the thought and effort so we don’t have to hold the clipboard of life for one day.
The best part? Even if it’s not perfect, we’ll cherish the surprise and your attempt to make us feel special. Sometimes, the sweetest gesture is you showing us you know our favorites.
We’re not looking for magic. We just want to see that you care enough to take the reins, even if it means cereal and coffee under the trees.
2. Handle the Wake-Up—Let Us Sleep In
You know that moment when you’re lying in bed and realize you don’t have to jump up and referee the breakfast chaos? That’s pure bliss. Letting us sleep in guilt-free, no passive-aggressive sighs or stomping around, is a gift money can’t buy.
If you keep the kids quiet, even better. And if, by some miracle, there’s hot coffee waiting when we finally emerge? We’ll honestly feel like royalty for a morning.
We love our babies, but the chance to wake up slow, without responsibilities knocking on the door, is what dreams are made of. It’s not about laziness—it’s about feeling valued.
3. Give Us Genuine Words—Not Just “Happy Mother’s Day”
Por vezes, what we crave most is to know you really see us. Skip the generic “You’re an amazing mom” and try sharing a memory or detail only you’d notice. Maybe it’s how we soothe a nightmare, or the way we remember everyone’s shoe size.
We don’t need a sappy poem (unless that’s your thing), but a few heartfelt sentences about the mother you see when you look at us? That’s what sticks.
Specificity is everything—tell us about the time we handled a meltdown or made you laugh in the middle of chaos. Let us feel appreciated for who we are, not just the title we hold.
4. Help the Kids Make Something Special
Ever notice how the sweetest keepsakes are the ones with crooked hearts and glitter everywhere? The best Mother’s Day cards aren’t bought—they’re made with sticky fingers and big imaginations. Help the kids create something special—even if it’s not Pinterest-worthy.
It’s not about perfection. It’s about intention. Noticing the effort behind the smudged paint and misspelled words? That’s what melts our hearts.
When you sit down and get messy along with them, it means everything. It also shows the kids that making someone feel loved is worth a little glitter on the floor.
5. Get Us in the Picture—Nicely!
Let’s be real: there are a thousand photos of you and the kids, and maybe two of us—one with our eyes closed and the other with yogurt in our hair. On Mother’s Day, flip the script. Offer to take a real photo, no complaints, no weird angles, no “say cheese” pressure.
We want to look back and actually see ourselves in the story, not just behind the scenes. Candid moments count too; catch us laughing or snuggling, not just lined up like it’s school picture day.
This isn’t about vanity. It’s about memories and proof that yes, we were there and we mattered.
6. Tackle Meals Like a Pro—Or at Least Try
If you want to sweep us off our feet, don’t just make breakfast—handle all the food. Yes, that means cooking, ordering, or picking up our favorite takeout, and making sure the kids are fed too.
Even if things get a little chaotic, the thought that we don’t have to think, “What’s for dinner?” for just one day is a bigger deal than you think. Extra points if you tackle cleanup without making it a production.
We’re happy with cereal and coffee or three-course meals. Just please, let us take a break from planning, prepping, and clearing plates. That’s true luxury.
7. Tell the Kids Why Mom’s a Big Deal
Kids see everything. When you sit them down and tell them, out loud, why their mom is so awesome, it sticks. Not as some mushy speech, but as a real moment—“You know all the little things Mom does? That’s worth celebrating.”
It’s one thing for us to hear it, but when the kids hear it from you, it’s like an instant badge of honor. Model appreciation. Show them that love and gratitude should be spoken, not assumed.
Even if our faces turn red, we’re secretly beaming. Those words echo for years, way longer than breakfast in bed ever could.
8. Let Us Be Off Duty—No Organizing Required
You know what makes us feel celebrated? Not having to be the cruise director. If we’re coordinating nap times or packing the diaper bag, it just feels like any other day.
Give us the luxury of checking out. Take over the logistics, the reminders, all the invisible tasks.
It’s not about what you plan, it’s about us feeling like the day is truly ours. Give us space to be present, not responsible. That’s a real gift.
9. Give a Gift That Says, “I Get You”
Forget the frantic last-minute run to the store. What feels amazing is getting a gift that’s clearly about us—our quirks, our hobbies, the random thing we mentioned back in March.
It could be a well-chosen book, a favorite snack, or something handmade. It’s the feeling that you paid attention, that you remember what lights us up.
It’s never about how much you spend. It’s about the message: “I see you. I know you.” That’s the kind of present that makes us smile every time we see it.
10. Grant Us an Hour—Totally Alone
Every mom has that fantasy: peace, quiet, and nobody calling her name for 60 whole minutes. On Mother’s Day, give us a real break, not just a trip to the bathroom with the door cracked.
Let us read, nap, scroll our phone, or soak in the tub—guilt-free and uninterrupted. It’s not about escaping the family. It’s about recharging and remembering who we are outside of motherhood.
An hour might not seem like much, but to us, it feels like a vacation. Trust us: we’ll come back happier, softer, and ready for the next round.
11. Acknowledge the Tough Stuff—Out Loud
Being a mom is beautiful, but it’s also hard—like, really hard sometimes. What we long for is someone to say, “I see how much you do, even when it’s messy and overwhelming.”
You don’t have to fix it or make a speech. Just a simple acknowledgement goes a long way. “You’re doing an amazing job, even on the days it’s tough.”
Hearing that you recognize the struggle AND the triumph? That’s the validation we need. It turns invisible work into something real and valued.
12. Take Pressure Off—No Expectations for Intimacy
Here’s a little secret: Dia da Mãe should not come with any strings attached. We want to feel loved, cherished, and relaxed—not like we owe you extra affection because you made breakfast.
Let the day be about us, not about what you might get later. Real appreciation means putting our comfort first, with zero pressure.
If we want to snuggle or be close, great. If not, celebrate us anyway. The freedom to just be ourselves is the best gift you can give.
13. Share a Real Post—Not Just for Show
We all know the standard “Happy Dia da Mãe to my amazing wife” post. But what makes us feel seen is a social media shout-out that’s honest. Not perfect, not performative—just you, sharing what you genuinely appreciate about us.
Maybe it’s a silly family photo, or a story about something we did that made you proud. Skip the clichés.
When you show the world why you love us in your own words, it feels real. We want your friends—and ours—to know we’re more than just the person who keeps the snacks stocked.
14. Hold Space for Mom’s Story—Even the Hard Parts
Mother’s Day isn’t easy for everyone. Some of us miss our moms, or carry grief that’s heavier on this day. What matters is that you let us talk about it—whether it’s happy, sad, or complicated.
Don’t rush to cheer us up or change the subject. Sometimes, we just need you to sit with us, no advice, no fixing.
The gift is in your presence: letting us feel every messy emotion without worrying that we’re “ruining” the day. That’s love in action.
15. Carry the Mental Load—for Once
Ever think about all the things we remember without ever writing them down? Mother’s Day is your turn to carry the mental checklist—snacks, sunscreen, extra clothes, the works. Don’t ask us what needs to be done; just do it.
When you step into that invisible role, even for a day, it’s like you’re saying, “I get it.” And honestly, it’s a breath of fresh air.
Noticing the details, pitching in without a prompt, and letting us relax? That’s how you show true appreciation—by walking a mile in our mental shoes.
16. Say Thank You—Loud Enough for the Kids to Hear
Gratitude is louder when it’s public. When you say, “Thank you for all you do,” in front of the kids, it teaches them that appreciating each other is normal—not just expected.
It’s not about grand gestures. It’s about those everyday thanks that add up to respect. Our kids learn what love looks like from us, and your words matter.
So go ahead, say it out loud. Let them see you notice all the small things that make our family run.
17. Ask What We Need—And Actually Listen
You know what’s romantic? Asking, “What do you need today?”—and really meaning it. Not because you want to cross it off a list, but because you care about what would make us feel good, right now.
Sometimes, we don’t even know what we need until you ask and give us space to think. Let us be honest, no judgment.
It’s a small question, but it opens the door to real connection and kindness. That’s what makes Mother’s Day feel like more than just another Sunday.