20 Razões pelas quais ele pode deixar-te, apesar de te amar
Almost every time my friends called me heartbroken, telling me their boyfriend left them, the conversation ended the same way. It’s like I am listening to the same story all over again. It always acontece tão subitamente e nunca o esperamos.
We would often try to figure out the reasons behind it, but we’ve barely ever been successful. They seem like they are head over heels in love, and the next thing you know, he’s out the door. It almost always comes together in a package with a mudança súbita de energia e comportamento.
God knows how many times I’ve tried to understand this. I thought a lot about my personal experiences and the stories my friends would tell me. Then, it finally hit me!
Existem padrões comuns nas experiências de todos nós porque, no fim de contas, somos todos humanos, iguais no nosso âmago. Todos nós queremos coisas semelhantes e, da mesma forma, coisas semelhantes afastam-nos.
Muitas vezes temos ressentimento tácito e quando as coisas finalmente se acumulam e se tornam um fardo demasiado pesado, we leave. So, let’s resolve this question once and for all!
1. You don’t appreciate him!
Se quer sentir-se como uma rainha, certifique-se de que também o trata como um rei. Os homens merecem amor e carinho just as much as we do. Even though they probably won’t directly ask for it, they still want to feel appreciated.
When I notice my boyfriend has started getting cranky, I give him some hugs and kisses and he’s like new! Try my method and you’ll see it’s not that serious.
Don’t forget to dizer-lhe que lhe está grato for everything he does for you. Trust me, you’ll have him around your finger in no time. A little bit of gratitude goes a long way.
2. He’s scared of commitment!
“I am not ready for this. I think I need more space.”
A velha e famosa frase, que provavelmente já todos ouvimos. Na tradução, provavelmente significa algo entre as linhas de ele ser medo de investir as suas emoções e comprometer-se com uma mulher para o resto da sua vida.
Esta é muitas vezes a razão pela qual deixam a mulher que amam. Eles adoram a ideia de uma relação, mas são não estão dispostos a submeter-se totalmente a uma pessoa. Se houvesse uma frase para descrever isto, seria: “Right person, wrong time.”
3. Nada de fogo de artifício no quarto!
Os homens gostam de fazer amor, que surpresa. A falta de intimidade física pode acontecer por uma série de razões diferentes.
Acontece mais frequentemente em relações duradouras porque os casais tendem a esquecer que têm de manter a chama viva! Without sparks, there is no fire. Without fire, everyone’s cold. You don’t want him looking for warmth somewhere else, do you?
Também pode acontecer que não estejam muito interessados nas coisas do quarto e, por isso, evitam-no. De qualquer forma, uma comunicação aberta vale ouro e pode resolver problemas como este. Também pode simplesmente levá-lo para o quarto e abanar o mundo dele. Isto também funciona muito bem!
4. Trata-o como um projeto!
Lembro-me da minha tia depois de se ter divorciado. Estava sentada no alpendre da sua casa, completamente destroçada. Enquanto exalava o fumo do cigarro cheio de desilusão, disse:
”Women marry men thinking they can change them and men marry women thinking they’ll never change.”
Foi então que percebi que é preciso perguntar a si próprio se só se apaixonou por uma ideia de como ele poderia ser ou o verdadeiro ele.
Women tend to have a need to fix everything and damn it, we are not Bob the Builder! Men feel annoyed when women try to correct everything they do or change them completely to their likeness. I mean…wouldn’t you feel annoyed?
5. Queixa-se demasiado!
Let’s be honest, we sometimes go overboard, especially if it’s that time of the month. As minhas hormonas podem fazer-me enlouquecer and then I say things I don’t really mean.
I once thought to myself, wow, I am acting like a teenage girl in puberty. However, you know what they say – “Acknowledgment is the first step towards change.”
Apesar de, por vezes, nos irritarem imenso, devemos ser um pouco mais brandos com eles. Constante criticar e chatear can make them feel as if they are incompetent and not good enough, and that’s a pretty big turn-off for them. They want to feel empowered instead.
6. Girl, you simply ain’t fun!
A minha amiga estava sempre ocupada e tinha outras prioridades sempre que o namorado inventava algo novo para experimentarem. Num piscar de olhos, ele encontrava a diversão noutro lugar!
Your relationship doesn’t have to be like a rollercoaster all the time but going on a fun ride from time to time never hurt anyone.
Mais ou menos, ambos são responsáveis por esta parte da vossa vida. O que se passa é que, se ele sentir que nunca inicia nada divertido e diferente ele pode aborrecer-se ou sentir-se preso à mesma rotina todos os dias.
7. The man’s intimidated by you!
Todos nós conhecemos aquela mulher que transborda de confiança e que é o epítome do sucesso numa pessoa. As mulheres podem sentir-se inspiradas por ela, os homens podem sentir-se ameaçados.
This issue goes deep into the expectations set by our society, but that’s a whole different story for some other time. He is sometimes just com medo de o ter ultrapassado e pode procurar alguém melhor do que ele. Podemos censurá-lo?
There’s always a simple solution to this. Try to communicate about what would help him feel better in his skin. You can help him achieve his goals and then continue growing together with each other by your side!
8. You just can’t agree on anything!
Imagine you are with someone who wants to have kids and you are nowhere near that idea. I literally managed to kill a cactus once. A cactus! If I can’t look after a plant, how would I keep a whole human being alive?
Estas grandes questões e planos podem ser um grande problema especially if you are both stubborn and can’t make an agreement that would suit you both. To some people, even the question of religion and political opinions can matter.
Muitos destes problemas poderiam ser resolvidos com comunicação aberta e honesta. As you know, men are not really experts when it comes to communicating their feelings so make sure you sit your man in front of you and initiate a conversation if you feel something’s wrong!
However, don’t be sad if there’s nothing you can do, because maybe something better waits for you around the corner. Every end is a new beginning!
9. Fazes com que ele se sinta como um figurante, não como o protagonista!
Is your schedule jam-packed, and he’s left feeling like a side character in your life? If your world revolves around your job, friends, or hobbies, and you only squeeze him in when there’s time, he might start feeling like an afterthought.
No guy wants to feel like he’s playing second fiddle. Sure, life gets busy, but making him feel seen and valued doesn’t have to be hard. A sweet text like, “Hey, thinking about you!” or planning a low-key night together can remind him that he’s not just filling in the gaps.
The truth is, men like to feel needed too – even the little things count. You don’t have to drop everything, but a little more attention can go a long way.
10. He feels like he’s doing all the work
Relationships are a two-way street, but if he’s always the one planning dates, resolving arguments, and putting in effort, he might start feeling like he’s carrying the whole load.
Think about it – when was the last time you surprised him with something sweet? Or took the lead on making plans? Guys like to feel spoiled too, even if they don’t say it out loud.
Show him that you’re just as invested. Whether it’s a small gesture like his favorite snack or planning a fun day together, it’ll remind him that he’s not in this alone.
11. You’re using him as your personal therapist!
Look, relationships are a safe space to share your feelings, but there’s a fine line between leaning on your partner and dumping every emotional struggle on him. If every conversation turns into a vent session about your boss, your friend drama, or your family issues, it can feel a little overwhelming for him.
The truth is, he’s not a therapist (unless he actually é one), and while he’ll always want to support you, carrying that weight all the time can be draining. Make sure you’re spreading your emotional load across your support system – your besties, your family, or even a professional if needed.
Dessa forma, quando se abrir com ele, vai sentir-se mais como uma ligação e menos como um fardo.
12. He’s feeling lost in his own life
Sometimes, it’s not you – it’s life. If he’s feeling stuck in his career, unhappy with himself, or unsure of his goals, it can spill over into your relationship.
Men often tie their self-worth to their accomplishments, so when things aren’t going well, they might retreat or even push you away. It’s not fair, but it’s how some guys cope.
Be there to support him, but also remind him that his struggles don’t define him. Ultimately, though, he has to find his way on his own.
13. He’s got baggage, and it’s not yours to unpack!
Sometimes, it’s not even about you – it’s about the stuff he’s been carrying for years. Whether it’s childhood trauma, a toxic ex, or some unresolved guilt, that emotional baggage can weigh down even the happiest relationship.
Here’s the deal: you can love and support him, but you can’t fix him. Healing is an inside job, and if he’s not ready to do the work, he might pull away. It’s not fair, but it’s reality.
If he’s willing to open up, listen and encourage him. But don’t lose yourself trying to solve problems that aren’t yours to solve.
14. You’re the queen of guilt trips!
Nobody likes feeling like they’re constantly in trouble. If you’re always blaming him for things or making him feel bad about his choices, it can make him feel like he can’t win no matter what.
Instead of focusing on what he’s doing wrong, try approaching problems as a team. Say, “How can we fix this together?” instead of “Why do you always do this?” It’ll shift the dynamic and make him feel supported instead of attacked.
15. He’s still hung up on the past
Whether it’s an ex he hasn’t moved on from or regrets about things he’s done, his past might be holding him back from fully committing to you. And let’s be honest, competing with a memory is exhausting and unfair.
If he’s bringing up his ex a little too often or seems stuck in “what could have been,” it’s a red flag. You can try talking it out, but if he can’t let go of the past, he’s going to have a hard time building a future with you.
Don’t let yourself be his rebound or emotional crutch. You deserve someone who’s ready to move forward, not look backward.
16. You’re smothering him like a heavy blanket!
Okay, we’ve all been guilty of this at some point. When you’re super into someone, it’s natural to want to spend all your time with them, but guys need their space – even when they love you to bits.
If you’re texting him non-stop, checking where he is 24/7, or showing up unannounced, you might be crossing the line from loving to pegajoso. The thing is, a guy needs to feel like he still has his freedom. It’s not because he doesn’t care – it’s because that freedom lets him miss you and come back even stronger.
So let him have his nights out with the guys or his alone time to recharge. He’ll appreciate it, and you’ll find your time together feels even more special
17. You’re growing in different directions
Let’s be real – people change over time. Maybe you’re leveling up your career while he’s figuring out his next move, or maybe you’ve discovered new passions that don’t line up with his. It happens.
The tough part is, when you’re not on the same page anymore, it can create this unspoken distance. He might start to feel like he’s no longer the guy who can walk this path with you.
But here’s the thing: growing apart doesn’t always mean the end. If you still love each other, you can work on bridging that gap together. If not, it’s okay to accept that you’re just in different places and let each other go.
18. He doesn’t think he’s good enough for you
This one’s sneaky because it’s not always obvious. If he feels like he can’t measure up to your standards – or worse, a sua própria ideia dos vossos padrões – he might start to self-sabotage the relationship.
Maybe you’re super successful, confident, and have your life together, and he feels like he’s still figuring things out. Even though you’re not thinking less of him, his insecurities might convince him otherwise.
The best way to handle this? Show him love, encourage him, and remind him that you’re with him because you querer para ser. Mas lembre-se, a autoestima dele também tem de ser trabalhada.
19. You’re not speaking his love language
You might think you’re showing him love, but if it’s not in a way he understands, he might still feel disconnected. Maybe you’re buying him gifts, but all he really wants is for you to spend quality time with him or give him a hug after a long day.
Ask him what makes him feel loved – seriously, just ask. It might feel a little awkward, but it’s so worth it. Once you know, you can love him in a way that actually hits home.
20. He’s just not feeling it anymore
This is the hardest one to hear, but sometimes love fades. It’s not about you doing something wrong – it’s just life.
If he’s honest with you about how he feels, it might hurt, but at least you know the truth. And honestly, it’s better to let go than hold onto someone who isn’t all in.
Cada fim é um novo começo, e a pessoa certa está lá fora à sua espera.
