Na tua ausência, ensinaste-me a viver sem ti

Na tua ausência, ensinaste-me a viver sem ti.

There was once a time when I couldn’t imagine my life sem ti nele. Entraste na minha vida e, inesperadamente, tornaste-te a pessoa mais importante para mim.

Tornaste-te o meu melhor amigoFoste a minha rocha, o meu conforto e a minha verdade para a realidade. Foste a minha maior líder de claque, dizendo que estarias sempre lá para me apoiar. Acreditavas em mim quando mais ninguém acreditava, incluindo eu própria.

Na tua ausência, ensinaste-me a viver sem ti.

I tried not to fall in love with you but I was absolutely powerless to stop. Before I realized the danger zone, I’d fallen so deeply into the ravine of loving you like I’d never loved before.

Without trying, you had full custody of my heart. Oh, I don’t blame you for the heartbreak I was too blind to see coming. You told me that we were just friends.

You said that you didn’t want a relationship. I just had hope to change your mind and you selfishly encouraged me with my success when you never planned to.

Na tua ausência, ensinaste-me a viver sem ti.

I told you that I wasn’t perfect. I knew that I would annoy you sometimes. I knew that compared to you, I was a complete mess.

But I believed that you had allowed your heart to love me in return and that together we’d find a way to make it work. I never could have imagined the havoc that would be thrown our way from every direction.

Nunca poderia ter previsto os acontecimentos que me levariam ao fundo do poço. Mas tu nunca pareceste desistir de eu. Parecia que continuava a estar do meu lado, encorajando-me a avançar quando eu queria desistir.

Na tua ausência, ensinaste-me a viver sem ti.

Enquanto todos os outros se viravam e se afastavam de mim, tu estavas lá para me dizer que o problema era deles e não meu.

Disseste-me para continuar a fazer o que tinha de fazer. A cada desilusão em que me pegavas, eu apaixonava-me mais e mais por ti. Apercebi-me de que o meu coração já estava tão longe, mas ainda acreditava em milagres e magia.

I believed that I was one step closer to being yours as I found a more positive outlook. I believed that the day of ‘us’ was just around the corner.

Na tua ausência, ensinaste-me a viver sem ti. Então, como é que eu ia ver o dia em que desapareceste?

Disseste que estavas a ser o grande empurrão de que eu precisava para fazer avançar as coisas para o melhor da minha vida. Disseste que ainda estavas lá para mim e que ainda estarias na minha vida. Sabias que eras a ÚNICA pessoa que eu tinha na minha vida.

O único a quem eu podia pedir conselhos. O único com quem podia chorar. O único com quem podia contar. Sabias o quanto eu te amava e precisavas que me lembrasses de continuar.

In your absence you’ve taught me how to live without you.

So in the last month I’ve been doing what I could to bring things to a better state. I’ve been working to get my life back on track. I’ve been trying new ideas and I’ve been scared to try some others.

I’ve thought of solutions I hope will accomplish my goals. But I’ve done it alone. You haven’t been here. You have gone days without communicating with me.

You know that I cannot go anywhere and you haven’t come to see me.

When I suggested you come and see me, you avoided the subject. You don’t call to see how I’m doing or how my progress is going.

You don’t call to see if I’m OK. You only call to tell me about your problems or to ask my opinion, even though we both know that you won’t take my advice anyway.

Na tua ausência, ensinaste-me a viver sem ti.

Por isso, agora sei que posso viver sem ti. O meu coração dói pelos sonhos que um dia tive para nós. Apanho-me a querer chegar até ti e partilhar algo contigo.

But I then remind myself that you aren’t doing the same with me. And if you really wanted to know if I was OK, then you would ask. If I was important to you, then you would make some effort. Instead, you just abandoned me. Just like everyone else.

You now only see the negative in me and no longer believe in me. I could ask myself why I should try, if no one, not even you, believes in me and sees my potential. I could ask myself that but I won’t. I won’t ask because I know what I hold inside.

I know my value and importance. I’m just sad that you can’t. I no longer need validation from you because in your absence, you’ve taught me how to live without you.

In your absence you’ve taught me how to live without you.

For so long, the only thought that went through my head was the incessant question, ‘’How do I live without you?’’

Como é que eu vivo sem a pessoa que fez de mim a mulher que eu sou? Como é que eu vivo sem a única pessoa que me moldou para ser a melhor versão de mim mesma?

Aquele que nunca se cansou de me fazer melhorar e que sempre me apoiou, independentemente de tudo.

Como é que uma pessoa se habitua a viver sem alguém que acreditava ser a sua cara-metade?

It was tough. It took me time, I’m not going to lie. I had to stop myself from wondering why, in order to stay sane. It was a roller coaster of emotions… but I pulled through.

Na tua ausência, ensinaste-me a viver sem ti.

Now, instead of torturing myself wondering why you’ve abandoned me, I tell myself that if it was destinado a ser, you’d still be here.

God has a funny way of showing me what’s good for me but I choose to believe that I’m on my way to something more meaningful. Something that is going to come into my life, make me happy, and stick by my side come hell or high water.

Acreditei tolamente que eras a minha alma gémea. A única pessoa neste mundo que foi criada para estar ao meu lado e segurar sempre a minha mão. A pessoa sem a qual eu nunca teria de viver. Mas eu estava errado.

Now I see that you came into my life to teach me a lesson. That no matter how much love there is and no matter how deeply connected I felt to you… if it’s not in the cards for us, it’s not going to last.

It was a tough pill to swallow but that’s what helped me push forward without looking back every two minutes.

Na tua ausência, ensinaste-me a viver sem ti.

Hoje, aceito o que se passou entre nós. Aceito que o que tivemos foi especial, profundo, profundo e mágico e que, enquanto durou, foi uma onda sensacional de sentimentos que me percorreu o corpo e a alma.

Já não sinto ressentimento e raiva quando penso em ti. Agora só sinto pena da tua maneira de ser.

See, I’m going to be fine. I’m not going to let this define me, mark me or destroy me.

It’s going to be rough getting over you with no closure but I’ll be damned if I’m going to let it stop me from living my life.

You know your reasons for leaving me and you’re the one who needs to live with them. I, on the other hand, have a clear conscience. There is nothing that is troubling me and keeping me from sleeping at night.

One of these days, I’m going to wake up and you won’t be the first thought that pops into my head. And when that happens, I’m going to know that I’ve made it. You’re no longer somebody whose company I crave, and I’ll finally be free of you.