Não há códigos ou desculpas, a forma como ele te trata é o que ele sente por ti

Vamos lá, sejamos honestos: quantas horas, dias ou mesmo semanas da sua vida desperdiçou a dissecar o comportamento de um homem?

How many times have you called your girlfriends to ask them one simple question: “What does this mean?”

O que é que este tipo quer de mim? Como é que ele se sente? Ele tem algum plano para o nosso futuro? Ou será que eu apenas temporário?

Porque é que ele está sempre a aparecer e a desaparecer da minha vida? Isto é apenas um caso? Sou namorada dele? Estamos a namorar exclusivamente? Ou ele anda com outras pessoas?

O que é que se esconde por detrás do seu comportamento quente e frio? Qual é a nossa posição?

If he loves me, why does he behave like this? On the other hand, if he doesn’t care, why doesn’t he leave me alone?

Sounds familiar, right? The list goes on and on. The bottom line is that you’re racking your brain, trying to get to the bottom of a guy’s behavior.

You’re dissecting his mixed signals, looking for a hidden message. The worst part is that too often, you ask for the help of a friend.

Reúne-se um verdadeiro comité de gestão de crises em busca de respostas.

Inspecciona cada um dos seus textos, analisa os seus padrões de comportamento até ao âmago e investiga as suas acções, tentando encontrar um raio de sol nesta escuridão.

E what do you conclude from all of this? That’s right, nothing. You’re always left more confused than ever, with all of these question marks still floating around your head.

Why? Because you don’t have the courage to look the truth in the eyes.

Yes, I know you’ve tried talking to him about all of this a million times. But let’s face it – he tells you the same things over and over again; he tells you what you want to hear.

Provavelmente, este homem garante-lhe que a ama. Convence-a de que ele é assim mesmo, que precisa de tempo para se abrir, ou que é o máximo que pode dar.

No entanto, he doesn’t give you any logical explanation of why his actions don’t back up his words.

Look, I don’t mean to judge you. Yes, you’re wasting your time and energy on all of this nonsense. But I get you. We’ve all been there, and I’m no exception.

Well, precisely because I’ve been you, I’m here to tell you the harsh reality: all of this is pointless.

You see, there is absolutely no need to decode anyone’s behavior. Putting in the effort to get to the bottom of a guy’s attention is pointless, and it won’t get you anywhere.

Detesto ser eu a rebentar a tua bolha, mas não existem sinais contraditórios. Se ele te amasse, tu saberias. If you two were in a steady relationship, you wouldn’t have these doubts.

He doesn’t play hard to get just to make you fall for him harder – he’s just playing mind games with you. Ele brinca com o teu coração para aumentar o seu frágil ego.

He is not too busy to give you a place in his life. Instead, a man’s lack of attention always equals a lack of love.

It’s not that he is não está preparado para uma relação right now – he doesn’t want a relationship with you.

He doesn’t come to you when all those other girls turn their backs on him because he realizes that you’re the one.

He does it because he knows very well that you’re the only one who will always take him back, no matter what.

He doesn’t come asking for a second chance every time he screws things up because he realizes that he can’t live without you.

He is not scared of losing you – he is scared of losing his safety net and backup option.

He doesn’t push you away to see whether you’re worthy of him breaking down his walls. He is not treating you like shit because he is scared of getting hurt – he is just an asshole with zero empathy.

He is an asshole who does all of this for one simple reason: because he can. You’re the one giving him the green light to continue with his toxic behavior every time you justify his actions.

Por isso, por favor, chega de desculpas vazias. Chega de justificar as suas acções tóxicas.

Enough of waiting for a miracle that will never happen. Your efforts and love can’t change him, so you better give up before wasting more of your time.

Stop hoping that things will work in your favor because they won’t. Stop giving him endless segundas oportunidades porque sempre que o fizeres, vai acabar da mesma maneira.

The bottom line is that this man is not emotionally unavailable or broken – he is just not emotionally invested in you.

This guy doesn’t love you enough, and he never will. When a man acts like he doesn’t care for you – you better believe him.