Acabou mesmo? 10 sinais reveladores de que é hora de terminar o namoro
Como saber quando uma relação está terminada
Breaking up is hard. It’s easier to stay in a familiar situation, even if it’s not ideal, but there are some telltale signs that can’t be ignored, regardless of how many shared memories you have.
If you have tried to compromise and communicate but things are still stagnant, it’s time to consider a new path.
Here are the 10 telltale signs that it’s time to break up.
You Give But He Doesn’t
Duas pessoas numa relação devem agir como uma equipa. Ambos se esforçam para que a relação funcione e arranjam tempo um para o outro. Há alturas em que uma pessoa precisa de dar um pouco mais, mas essas alturas equilibram-se.
Se der por si a cozinhar, a limpar, a insistir no tempo que passam juntos e a pagar tudo, é porque as coisas não estão bem com o seu parceiro.
Many women fall into this trap. You give and give and give while your man withdraws, so you give more. You blame yourself for everything that’s wrong until things get so bad that they simply break down.
Try to avoid giving too much if it’s not reciprocal. Only put as much into him as he puts into you.
You’ve Grown Apart
It happens. Some people grow while other relationships stagnate. Maybe your boyfriend or husband is still sitting on the couch while you’re out exploring or maybe the two of you are pursuing different things because your hobbies don’t align.
Tive uma cliente que se manteve muito religiosa enquanto o marido deixou de ir à igreja. Isto era inaceitável para ela e estava dividida sobre o que fazer. Por fim, decidiu que tinha de o deixar.
Ele desrespeita-te
Este é um ponto importante no meu livro e deveria ser no seu! Quando um dos parceiros está constantemente a rebaixar o outro, a relação precisa de ser reavaliada.
Vejo isto quando saio com outros casais. Um dos parceiros repreende o outro à nossa frente; o desprezo pode ser cortado com uma faca.
This can spiral into emotional and even physical abuse if it’s not addressed immediately.
O sexo foi-se
Sex is a very important component of a relationship. It’s not everything but it’s a key litmus test for how close a couple is. Sex less frequently than once a week can be a warning sign.
There are exceptions, of course. If you’re in your eighties and have been together for fifty years, sex might be out of the picture. Even still, I find elderly couples still holding hands and kissing when they are in love.
You’re Constantly Fighting
Constant arguing is never a good sign. Most couples don’t know how to argue. They never learned because they don’t teach that in life.
There should be very little fighting in a healthy relationship. People in love respect one another’s opinions and work toward a compromise. They each want to hear what the other has to say because they want their partner to be happy.
Comunicação is an art and good communicators have empathy for the other person’s feelings and circumstances. They put themselves in someone else’s shoes to get the result they want.
Quando ambos os parceiros comunicam desta forma, é possível chegar a um compromisso. O resultado é uma situação em que todos ganham e a relação sai reforçada, não enfraquecida.
You’re Just Plain Miserable
If you dread seeing your guy, something is wrong! Sometimes, you try to overanalyze exactly what’s wrong and blame yourself or your partner. This gets you nowhere.
Se é esta a sua situação, confie na sua intuição e vá-se embora ou, pelo menos, sente-se e tenha uma conversa séria com alguém em quem confie. Provavelmente, essa pessoa já viu o que está escrito na parede.
RELACIONADO: Textos de fim de namoro: Mais de 50 mensagens de texto para terminar a relação
Life’s Curveballs
Olá, por vezes o amor não é suficiente. I’ve seen break-ups over religious and cultural belief differences.
Maybe your boyfriend wants to move to a foreign country and you don’t. He hates his family and you need to be near yours. Maybe you want kids and he doesn’t.
That’s life. Accept it, pack up and leave.
Vícios
Vejo isto a toda a hora. Os homens e a pornografia. O sexo virtual tornou-se tão fácil que alguns homens estão a substituir as relações saudáveis com as mulheres por vídeos no seu computador portátil.
If you see this, I say leave. The same thing applies to alcohol and drugs. If a man can’t care enough about his own health then how much can he care about you?
Your Goals Don’t Align
People’s goals change as they mature. My goal was money for years. Now I’m into helping others, charity and spiritual pursuits. My time is becoming extremely valuable.
If my wife was determined to live off the grid, for example, we would need to go our separate ways. That’s okay! It’s okay to recognize change, respect the other’s goals and leave on friendly terms.
Quem sabe, daqui a dez anos, talvez queira viver fora da rede!
He’s Holding You Back
You’ve got dreams and goals. A great lover and best friend encourages you to chase them but this man wants you home with him, or worse, he doesn’t care.
What happens? You drop your dreams and ‘fit in’ to make him happy. Instead, find a guy who has similar ambitions and supports your dreams and goals!
Uma mulher confiante não tem problemas em encontrar um homem que apoie o seu desejo de criar asas e voar.
Será que acabou mesmo? Conclusão
Too many couples stay together because they simply don’t want to be single again or for the sake of the children. Time is too precious to be with someone who falls into one or more of these categories above and the harm done to your children is done before you split, not after.
Only you can decide whether it’s time to end things or not. You must decide when you’ve taken as much as you can take or when things just don’t align properly.
