7 reglas para enviar mensajes de texto durante una cita que facilitarán tu vida amorosa

La forma en que envías los mensajes de texto y la forma en que interpretas los suyos en las fases iniciales de la cita pueden hacer o deshacer vuestra relación.

It seems like the dating world of today is unimaginable without texting and it seems to me it’s a lot harder for us women than for men.

I think that’s because whether we like to admit it or not, men made the rules of texting in their mind and it’s no wonder we get lost in them.

‘When to text, when not to text?’ , ‘When is texting perceived as clingy and when as uninterested?’ , ‘Why hasn’t he texted back, it’s already been half a day since I texted him?’…. It’s exhausting and it’s taking up way too much of our time.

It’s time we make our own rules and stick to them. I believe we all have had enough of playing by male rules; to be more precise, we have had enough of games altogether.

Sigue estas 7 reglas para enviar mensajes de texto durante una cita y verás cómo tu vida amorosa mejora y se hace más fácil:

1. Always text ‘NO’ to his last-minute plans

No sirve de nada quejarse a tus amigos de sus mensajes nocturnos y de sus planes para salir a última hora.

That won’t change a thing if you meet with him anyway.

Si quieres que piense en el futuro y haga planes para salir, enséñale el camino.

Every time he has a sudden desire to see you, tell him something along the lines of, “Sorry, I can’t right now, I am somewhere/have other plans.

Wish you had told me about it sooner.”

It’s a nice and polite way to tell him that you won’t be at his beck and call and that you want to be treated as a priority, not an option.

2. Desechar todas las teorías sobre los mensajes de texto frente a las llamadas.

Most women would argue that if he only texts and never calls then he simply isn’t interested enough. This couldn’t be further from the truth.

It’s time to look at texting from a male point of view: it’s easier and more efficient, they are usually better at expressing themselves in writing than through speech, algunos son tímidos por tanto, más confianza al enviar mensajes de texto, algunos creen que hay menos posibilidades de meter la pata al enviar mensajes de texto, etc.

Sin embargo, when he doesn’t text back for days, you shouldn’t try to find excuses for such behavior. 

Also, one more major thing to consider here is whether you’ve been dating for a while or just had a few dates. You can’t expect a man you’ve been on three dates with to call you and talk to you for an hour, as he wouldn’t know where to begin or what to say.

3. Insert an, “I’ll call you later,” game changer

Si realmente no le gustan los mensajes de texto y prefiere una llamada normal o incluso una videollamada, introduzca esa noción sutilmente en sus conversaciones.

Dile que se te da mucho mejor hablar que mandar mensajes.

Or when you sense that the moment is right, just text ‘Sorry I’m busy right now but I’ll call you later and tell you all about it’.

De este modo, tú darás el primer paso en cuanto a llamadas y verás si él sigue tu ejemplo.

It’s important you make some compromise here and meet each other halfway as it will be easier for other aspects of your relationship too.

4. Don’t send sexts if you want more than sex

Don’t give him any boyfriend benefits until he is actually your boyfriend. Don’t send sexts in the early phases of a relationship either.

You don’t have to be a prude but you can postpone sexting hasta que se convierta en alguien a quien realmente conozcas y en quien confíes.

If sexting begins too soon, he will assume that you are in it just for sex or that you are easy to get into bed and after he gets what he wants, he will be on his way. So, don’t rush it.

On the other hand, if he insists on sexting or sends you texts that are full of sexual implications, you will know exactly where you stand with him; he is not interested in your heart—just your body.

If that’s not something you are into, wave him goodbye and send him packing, as he is not worth your time.

5. Evitar caer en la trampa de las (malas) interpretaciones

What’s taking him so long to respond? What is the meaning of his ‘OK’ text, is he mad at me?  

Ayer estuvimos mandándonos mensajes todo el día, así que hoy ¿ha perdido el interés o está jugando? etc.

Most women love to interpret texts and unread texts, I know I was one of them until the simple truth slapped me in the face: The male brain is completely opposite to the female brain; we don’t look at things the same way.

Try to relax and not give it too much thought. In the early stages of dating, you don’t need to be so strict as you are just getting to know each other.

He doesn’t have to set a schedule of when to text.

Lo importante es que veas que está interesado, que está haciendo todo lo posible por mantenerse en contacto y conocerte un poco mejor a través de mensajes de texto y, lo más importante, que está haciendo planes para verte en persona.

6. Nunca envíes un SMS de seguimiento o un SMS de más

Cada vez que sientas el impulso de enviar un mensaje de seguimiento, resístete todo lo que puedas.

Si hubiera querido responder, ya lo habría hecho, o puede que no haya visto tu mensaje, y si le das seguimiento parecerá que estás necesitada y desesperada por llamar su atención.

If he isn’t sending a text back there is nothing you can do about it. Let him be. Not getting a text back is a strong message in itself.

Don’t make things worse on yourself by sending a follow-up text.

Don’t send him tons of texts either, as even if he responds to all of them it’s the quickest way to suffocate your potential relationship.

Be more concerned with quality and not quantity; it’s more about what you text about than texting all the time.

Saber dónde ha estado todo el día o qué ha desayunado básicamente no vale nada, pero un mensaje en el que diga que ha pensado en ti todo el día es oro puro.

7. Déjale ser un hombre y tomar la iniciativa de vez en cuando

Creo que muchos de ustedes estarán de acuerdo conmigo cuando digo que las mujeres de hoy necesitan sentirse más mujeres.

Queremos a alguien que nos corteje y nos haga sentir especiales o, en otras palabras, necesitamos a un hombre que envíe ese maldito primer mensaje de vez en cuando.

It doesn’t have to be a rule, it doesn’t have to be always but it would be great if men would initiate a conversation more times than a woman does.

This doesn’t mean developing tactics or playing games, it’s a simple fact that men lose interest in things they get served on a silver platter, so if you are the one texting all the time, there is no need for him to make any efforts.