18 sinais reveladores de que ele está a lutar contra o que sente por ti

Não seria maravilhoso se pudesse saber a diferença entre um rapaz que não está interessado em si e aquele que foge das suas emoções? Bem, adivinha só: depois de leres estas sinais de que ele está a lutar contra os seus sentimentos por si, you’ll know exactly what you’re dealing with.

Manter as coisas informais, jogar jogos e brincar é bastante fácil para a maioria dos homens.

What’s not so easy is admitting to themselves and other people around them that they actually developed real feelings towards somebody. They are petrified.

Quer o admitam ou não, a simples ideia de mostrar os seus sentimentos e arriscar-se a ser magoado é assustadora.

CLIQUE AQUI para descobrir o segredo mais bem guardado sobre como conseguir que um homem se abra consigo completamente e para sempre.

Por isso, começam a lutar. Lutam primeiro contra si próprios porque, para a maioria deles, estar apaixonado significa estar vulnerável.

Lutam contra a outra pessoa enviando quente e frio Os sinais são emitidos até se sentirem seguros. Demoram o seu tempo e avaliam a situação antes de actuarem.

When you find yourself in the middle of this mess, you have trouble decoding your guy’s behavior. Does he display sinais de que ele está a lutar contra os seus sentimentos por si ou sinais que he doesn’t give a damn about you?

Este homem está a fugir de si porque é medo do quanto ele te ama ou porque ele quer que te afastes?

Even though the line appears thin, there are some tricks that can help you see what’s really going on.

18 Sinais claros de que ele está a lutar contra o que sente por ti

Se tem a sensação de que ele gosta de si, mas algo o impede de o fazer, veja estes 18 sinais ele está a lutar contra os seus sentimentos por si. Certamente que irão esclarecer um pouco as coisas:

Ele está super atento durante algum tempo e depois afasta-se

The first sign you should pay attention to is this man’s inconsistency. You know exactly what I’m talking about- about a guy who is super attentive one day and then, all of a sudden pulls away.

This man will treat you like a Princess for some time. And the moment you think that finally, he came to his senses, he’ll change his behavior and become cold and distant.

He won’t ghost you completely but you’ll feel that something is off. Whether he admits it or not, it’s like this man becomes someone else overnight.

It will all happen without any reason in particular. Naturally, you can’t help but wonder if you’re dealing with two different guys or this one really has a split personality.

This is usually one of the most common red flags you are dealing with a player, but in this case, his pulling away won’t be so dramatic, long-term, or destructive. He will send random texts but not every day. There will be times when you won’t hear from him for days. When that happens, don’t text him and he will text you. 

Even if he IS a player, there’s always a way. Use O Sistema de Devoção para estar sempre em cima do jogo dele e fazer com que ele a persiga, e não o contrário.

Provavelmente, ele vai querer tornar-se seu amigo e manter as coisas casuais durante algum tempo até a conhecer melhor e até ter coragem suficiente para lidar com os seus sentimentos. Só então será capaz de os partilhar consigo.

However, be careful: this phase shouldn’t last for too long. If you feel like he has had enough time to process his emotions and he is just stalling, it’s not a sign he is fighting his feelings for you. It’s a sign that ele está a enganá-la.

Presta atenção quando falas e memoriza muito sobre ti

Este homem lembra-se de pequenas coisas sobre si? Ele sabe qual é a sua comida e cor favoritas? Ele saberia de cor a letra da sua música favorita, se alguém o acordasse a meio da noite?

Ele esforça-se por descobrir todas as camadas da sua personalidade? Será que ele nota a mais pequena mudança no seu comportamento?

Bem, what bigger “I love you” do you need? Este tipo de comportamento é um sinal claro de que ele está apaixonado por si.

He soaks up your every word. He remembers something you said randomly a few weeks ago that you yourself can’t recall. He will surprise you with some detail you randomly mentioned.

Also, he probably made in-depth research of your social media accounts, and even if he doesn’t hit the like button that often, he will surely keep track of your whereabouts.

This man is head over heels for you- it’s more than natural that he wants to learn more about the woman he is into. Trust me: even if you recite him your favorite recipe, he’d be all ears.

As suas perguntas são demasiado pessoais

When guys hit on you, they’ll probably use the same, corny pick-up lines. That also goes for the same, old questions most men ask when they want something more out of you.

A maior parte das vezes, será uma conversa ligeira, sem assuntos sérios. Um rapaz pode perguntar-lhe mais sobre a sua vida amorosa, carreira e outras informações básicas.

But when you’re dealing with a guy who is really interested in you but does his best to hide it, things will be a little different. This is the man who will try to ir mais fundo.

Ele não está interessado na cara que mostra ao mundo - ele quer conhecer o seu verdadeiro eu.

Ele quer saber tudo o que há para saber sobre si. Para além das perguntas aleatórias utilizadas em conversas de circunstância, ele fará algumas que são mais profundas.

Ele vai querer saber qual é a sua posição em relação a determinadas coisas, os seus gostos e desgostos, a história da sua vida amorosa, etc. Pode nem sempre ser agradável, mas ele quer minimizar o risco de se magoar.

He is trying to figure out whether you’re worthy of him opening up. He wants to find out what kind of a person you are because that tells him a lot about the kind of a GF you’d be.

Ele está a tentar impressioná-la

Todos os especialistas em relações concordam numa coisa: quando um o homem tem sentimentos fortes por siSe o seu namorado não for capaz de a impressionar, fará tudo o que puder para o impressionar. Não se trata de uma verdadeira manipulação, mas ele dir-lhe-á certamente coisas com o objetivo de se fazer parecer melhor.

Ele quer que vejas apenas o melhor dele e, por isso, esforça-se por fazer isso mesmo.

So, don’t fail to notice if he changes his appearance a bit or starts using new perfume.

He will also talk a lot about his strong points, his work success, and all the things he is proud of—not because he wants to brag but because he consciously or unconsciously wants to impress you.

Ele tem esta necessidade (inexplicável) de se justificar perante si

Vocês os dois não estão numa relação, certo? De facto, este homem não passa de o seu colega de trabalho ou são apenas amigos.

No entanto, apesar disso, ele tem a estranha vontade de lhe explicar os seus passos. É o caso, nomeadamente, da sua vida amorosa.

Even if you’re not asking any questions, he can’t stop justifying himself to you. That’s one of the biggest sinais de que um homem gosta de ti mas tem medo.

It won’t be anything big but he wouldn’t want you to get the wrong impression about certain things.

For example, every time he talks about some other woman in his life, he will stress the fact that she is his friend, so you won’t think that he is unavailable. Even if he’s dating a girl, he wants you to know she means nothing to him and presents it as nothing more but a fling.

Os olhos dele não te largam

Let’s not forget one thing: the eyes are the windows to the soul. Therefore, a guy doesn’t have to tell you a single word for you to understand his true feelings- you’ll know everything if you just look closely into his eyes.

É provável que o sinta a olhar, mas assim que se virar, ele desviará o olhar.

He doesn’t want to make it too obvious. Your friends will also notice his stars and inform you about them.

Nevertheless, when you stare back at him, he’ll probably look away. Eu sei you must think this man couldn’t care less about you.

But according to all relationship advice, this is just a sign that you’re lidar com um rapaz tímido who is terrified that you’ll read through his soul the moment your eyes lock.

Por outro lado, quando se fala com ele, ele vai certamente usar contacto visual prolongado e terás toda a sua atenção.

A sua linguagem corporal falará por ele

Ele vai tentar fazer-se de desentendido, mas a sua sinais de linguagem corporal estará fora de sincronia com a sua mente.

Para além do já mencionado contacto visual, os sinais corporais mais óbvios de que o está a deixar nervoso, no bom sentido, são as palmas das mãos suadas e trémulas. Ele também fica muito perto de si quando fala.

Enquanto estiver no meio de uma conversa, ele inclinar-se-á inconscientemente para si.

He also won’t miss the chance to put his hands on your shoulder or subtly touch your arm.

Se ele já ganhou alguma coragem, ele beijar-vos na face ou abraçá-lo um pouco mais do que o necessário sempre que se encontram.

Even though this man has the power to control his words, he can’t command his entire body. Trust me- he is doing all of this unknowingly.

Ele não tem consciência de que as suas acções o denunciam.

Ele gosta de o ajudar nas coisas

Normalmente, ele oferece-se para ajudar em alguma coisa. Pode ser desde ajudar a aliviar a sua mente, ouvindo e dando conselhos, até uma questão de trabalho manual, como mudar os móveis de lugar e colocar uma nova camada de tinta nas paredes.

He doesn’t mind getting his hands dirty or sitting for hours and listening to what you have to say. He is letting you know that you can count on him to do whatever.

No início, assume-se que ele está apenas a ser simpático e educado. Provavelmente, vocês são bons amigos, por isso não é de estranhar que ele lhe dê uma ajuda.

But if you look at things closely, you’ll see that he goes out of his way to help you. Let’s not forget that this man is not your boyfriend so it’s certainly not his job to take care of you.

No entanto, ele fá-lo na mesma. Ele não está a tratá-la desta forma porque quer irritá-la ou para fingir que é um tipo simpático.

Na verdade, ele gosta de o ajudar e de fazer coisas doces para si. Ele quer que saibas que podes contar com ele, aconteça o que acontecer.

Ele admira-a (embora nunca o diga em voz alta)

This man is quite closed. He has a huge (but fragile) ego and he would probably never praise anyone. It’s like his insecurities would blow out of proportion the moment he gives someone a compliment.

But even though he is not saying it out loud, this guy secretly admires you. He has huge respect for everything you do in life and that’s one of the reasons he’s so crazy over you.

Quando falas, tudo à volta dele pára e ele olha para ti como se fosses a criatura mais fascinante que existe.

Ele percebe que já passou por muito e admira o facto de ter conseguido apesar de tudo e de todos.

Every small victory of yours is pretty big in his eyes even though he wouldn’t say it straight up.

Ele vai ouvir e fazer alguns elogios subtis e aleatórios e isso será um sinal evidente do seu afeto em direção a si. Ele também começará a calling you ‘babe’. 

Ele fica em modo de proteção perto de si

Embora ele possa fazer piadas às suas custas, elas nunca são más ou rudes.

But every time someone else does the same, he doesn’t approve and always says something to defend you.

Ele também se certifica de que chegaste bem a casa e que estás em segurança. Quer o queira admitir ou não, ele preocupa-se e estes pequenos sinais indicadores apenas confirmar que ele está a lutar contra os seus sentimentos.

It’s actually pretty clear: this guy considers it o seu dever de o proteger. Even though you two are just friends, let’s not forget that he has some strong feelings for you.

You know how most men are: when they love someone, they get the urge to keep them safe. It’s one of their primary instincts and most of the time, this man is completely unaware of his behavior.

Sometimes, this man acts like your guardian angel. He’s there to get you out of trouble and to look after you.

Even when he’s not doing it transparently, he’s always there to keep an eye on you from a safe distance. And what more proof do you need of his love for you?

Ele mostra sinais de ciúme discreto

Once again, let’s remember that this guy is not your boyfriend. In fact, he didn’t move an inch to become one.

Therefore, he doesn’t have any right to protest against the fact that you have an active love life. And he’s pretty aware of that.

Nevertheless, that doesn’t mean he can’t control his emotions. He can’t help but be jealous, even though he might remain silent about it.

The truth is that he’ll do everything in his power to hide his anger when it comes to other men in your life. He won’t tell you that it bothers him, even if it breaks his heart. But if you look closely, you’ll notice sinais do seu ciúme secreto.

Ele não fica muito contente quando está na companhia de outros homens.

Mostly because he hasn’t acted upon his feelings and he is scared that somebody else will beat him to the punch.

Devido a isso, verá como o rosto dele fica pálido e o seu comportamento torna-se estranho. Ele sente-se claramente desconfortável e ciumento sempre que outros homens estão perto de si.

Para além disso, é provável que depois ele faça algumas perguntas para ver qual é a sua posição em relação a esses outros homens.

Of course, let’s not forget how he manages to find a fatal flaw in every guy in your surroundings. This way or another, it turns out that nobody is good enough for you.

Why does he do it? Well, isn’t it obvious? He wants you to see that he’s way better than all of those men and that he should be your first and only choice.

Ele é atencioso

A atenção é um dos sinais mais comuns de que ele está a lutar contra os seus sentimentos por si.

Como já referi, ele vai querer que o vejam no seu melhor, por isso, provavelmente, vai agir como um perfeito cavalheiro.

He will open doors for you. He will let you order first. He won’t shower you with expensive gifts, but everything he gifts you will come from the heart.

It doesn’t have to be anything major, but if he comes by with your favorite chocolate, that will be more than enough.

Partilha dados pessoais consigo

A maioria men don’t open up tão facilmente. É especialmente o caso de homens inseguros como ele.

He is scared of giving his heart out to anyone who might break it. After all, that’s exactly why he keeps his feelings to himself. And that’s why he keeps most of his life private.

But if a man like him started confiding in you, he looks at you as someone whom he can trust, and that’s always a good sign. Actually, according to all relationship experts, that’s one of the common signs that he’s closer than ever to tell you how he feels and making the first move.

If he can trust you enough to share his personal details with you, he’ll trust you enough to tell you how he feels.

Podemos ter conversa fiada com qualquer pessoa, mas todas as coisas pessoais são partilhadas com pessoas mais importantes.

Besides, he values your brains and he doesn’t only pay attention to your body. He will want your opinion on things that are happening currently or his plans for the future.

Em suma, ele terá uma necessidade inexplicável de o informar sobre tudo, sempre que tiver oportunidade.

Ele tem os seus períodos de frio

Remember how we talked about this guy’s inconsistent behavior in the beginning? Well, sadly, his cold phases are a part of this inconsistency.

Quando falo em períodos frios, penso em todas as vezes que este o homem deu um passo atrás. It’s not that he disappeared from your life for good but he did change his behavior out of the blue.

You’re getting textos de bom dia girosele faz coisas giras e vocês passam muito tempo juntos. Depois, de repente, tudo isso desaparece.

Nothing happened but you see that he became distant. It’s like he starts avoiding any kind of contact.

If you two are friends, you’ll be hanging out only as a part of the group, and if you’re coworkers, there won’t be any communication in your free time.

Of course, this doesn’t last for long. It’s more than obvious that he can’t stop being in touch with you.

Este é um dos sinais mais dolorosos de que ele está a lutar contra os seus sentimentos por si. Ele pode nem sequer ter consciência de que está a lutar contra eles.

E enquanto ele tem dificuldade em processar as coisas e racionalizar entre o que pensa e o que sente, você terá provavelmente mais dificuldade porque sentirá que ele está a brincar consigo.

Confie na sua intuição. É algo que ele faz sem intenção ou está a fazer jogos mentais?

Partilharão uma química e uma tensão sexual inegáveis

Eyes don’t lie, right? Well, the same goes for vibe- you simply can’t hide it, as much as you try.

That’s exactly what’s going on between you and this guy. It’s impossible not to notice the química que partilham.

Every time you enter the room, he won’t be able to keep a smile off his face.

Ele vai examiná-la de cima a baixo e encontra sempre uma forma de elogiar indiretamente o seu aspeto fantástico ou sensual.

Ele pode até tentar colocar todas as tensão sexual com alguns palavrões e comentários de cariz sexual.

Em suma, o magnetismo que vos liga é algo difícil de descrever, mas fácil e inevitável de sentir.

He won’t initiate one-on-one time…

Let’s get one thing clear: don’t expect this guy to invite you on a first date. In fact, it’s unlikely that he’ll ever initiate one-on-one time with you.

Even when he does it, he makes sure there is a valid excuse for you two to get together. He’ll never ask you just to hang out or something like that.

Instead, he’ll always use some kind of justification to be near you.

This man doesn’t have the courage to tell you: “I want to see you. I enjoy spending time with you”.

Besides, he’s scared of being alone with you. He is perfectly aware of the intensity of his feelings and he’s certain that he won’t be able to resist you se ele tiver a oportunidade de dar o primeiro passo.

At the same time, his fears prevent him from following his heart. Basically, he’s trapped in an endless circle.

… but he’ll never deny your invitation

On the other hand, you two still get to spend a lot of time together, even though he doesn’t initiate it, don’t you? If you analyze the situation better, you’ll realize that he never turns you down, when you’re the one who calls him to hang out.

Why is that so? Well, first of all, he doesn’t have the strength to tell you “no”. In this case, his desire to see you beats his fears.

It’s one thing that he manages not to call you at all. But resisting the temptation is something else.

If this man never denies your invitation, it’s one of the obvious signs he is fighting his feelings for you.

Ele tem um enorme respeito por si

Have you noticed that this guy treats you differently than all other women in his life? It’s because he respects you, above all other things.

Sim, ele gosta de ti. Tu excitas-o e he’s madly attracted to you. But he’d never do anything to give you an impression he’s treating you like a piece of meat.

Acreditem em mim quando vos digo que ele quer mais do que entrar nas vossas calças. Ele quer o pacote completo e faz questão que o vejas.

Porque é que os homens lutam contra os seus sentimentos?

 

It’s no surprise that a man hides his feelings. But why do they do it? Let’s find out.

He’s been hurt in the past

The first reason why this man can’t stop hiding his emotions is his painful past. It is likely that he’s been hurt and heartbroken in one of his previous relationships.

Então agora, he’s scared that history will repeat itself. The last time he carried his heart on the sleeve, it didn’t end well.

Naturalmente, ele espera que a mesma coisa volte a acontecer. Decidiu que a única forma de se proteger é fingir que não tem coração.

Ele desempenha o papel de um homem indiferente porque tem medo de que namorar uma mulher que ama descobrir todas as suas vulnerabilidades. E não é só isso - ele tem a certeza de que tu usarias os sentimentos dele contra ele.

Tem dificuldade em exprimir as suas emoções

It’s also possible that this guy is simply emocionalmente indisponível. I don’t know how it happened and when it started but the fact is that he has trouble expressing his emotions.

Maybe he is actually unaware of his feelings. It’s not that he only hides them from you- he also runs away from them.

There is obviously a thick wall around his heart and he doesn’t play allowing just about anyone to crush it.

There is a term for this condition and it’s called alexithymia. People who suffer from it have a hard time identifying their feelings and consequently, verbalizing and showing them to others.

Ele desempenha o papel de um tipo duro

No matter what you might think, men don’t have it easy in today’s world either. All guys are expected to be alpha men who can’t be bothered as easily as girls.

Se o seu homem desempenha o papel de durão, isso significa que ele não está em contacto com os seus sentimentos. Tem muito a ver com a masculinidade tóxica - a noção de que os homens precisam de cumprir certos ideais para serem suficientemente masculinos.

Um destes características masculinas tóxicas includes the suppression of emotions. And that’s exactly what this guy has been doing.

He can’t stand the fact that he is head over heels for a woman. It’s humiliating for him to admit that he can’t control his feelings whenever he’s around you, let alone that he’s losing sleep because of you.

So, he chooses indifference over getting emotionally naked. He thinks he needs to keep on pretending he’s this badass who plays with women in order to get respect from the rest of society.

Ele tem medo do quanto te ama

This man hasn’t loved anyone the way he loves you. And the a intensidade das suas emoções assusta-o até à morte.

Tem de compreender que isto é algo que ele nunca enfrentou antes. Ele tinha poder sobre os seus sentimentos até agora.

For the first time ever, his heart took control over his brain. He is led by his emotions and he is scared of where they’ll take him.

Admitting that he’s crazy about someone means stepping out of his comfort zone. Telling you he loves you means taking a leap into the unknown.

Vocês falam línguas de amor diferentes

Finally, is it possible that this guy isn’t hiding his feelings at all? Is it possible that you’re just incapable of hearing what he has to say?

Don’t get me wrong- this is not me accusing you of this situation. I’m just telling you that the cause of your problems is the fact that vocês falam línguas de amor diferentes.

Esta situação é mais comum do que se possa pensar. Enquanto espera pacientemente que ele verbalize as suas emoções, talvez ele esteja a expressar o seu amor de outra forma.

Let’s take this for an example: if his a linguagem do amor é o toque físico, he’ll express his emotions by accidentally touching you, hugging you, and using every chance he gets to be close to you.

But on the other hand, maybe your love language is words of affirmation. Maybe you don’t see his efforts and expect him to praise you and give you compliments.

The examples are endless but I’m sure you see where I’m going. Remember: there are five different love languages and maybe you just have yet to discover his.

O que fazer?

I won’t lie to you: this is the situation no girl wants to find herself in. But if you play your cards right, you can get out of it as a winner. Here is exactly what to do about a guy who is in love with you but has a hard time admitting it.

Fazer com que ele se sinta seguro

Whatever is the problem, you have to realize one thing: the core of this behavior is your man’s fear. He might be medo da rejeiçãode se magoar de novo, ou de se perder.

Either way, it’s your job to make him feel safe. This man has to understand that he can trust you, otherwise, he’ll never open up to you completely.

I won’t lie to you: conseguir isso com homens emocionalmente indisponíveis por vezes parece uma missão impossível. Mas acredite em mim quando lhe digo que pode ganhar a confiança dele se se esforçar o suficiente.

The most important thing here is not to push things too hard. You can’t force anyone to trust you- you have to earn it.

Dê tempo a este homem e prepare-se para esperar pacientemente até ele começar a sentir-se seguro ao seu lado.

É por isso que a melhor maneira de o fazer é tornar-se amigo dele. Mas cuidado para não ficar preso na friend zone.

Start by revealing some of your secrets. Open up to him about some private things from your life that don’t necessarily have to do with your relationship.

When he sees that you opened up to him- he’ll follow.

…but put all the cards on the table

Nevertheless, this doesn’t mean that you should allow for this kind of relationship to keep going forever. Instead, be brave enough to put all the cards on the table.

Don’t do it right away but after a while, once you see that you’ve reached some progress, be the first one to make a move.

You don’t have to kiss him or ask him on a first date. You don’t have to say three magical words either.

It will be enough to make it clear that you’re into him. But let him know that you’re aware of what’s going on in his head and heart, as well.

If it’s necessary, tell him straightforwardly that his attempts to hide his feelings are in vain.

Don’t be aggressive about it because isso vai assustá-lo. Just let him know that you understand him and that you’re ready to help him overcome his fears.

Considerações finais

The key thing to have in mind when trying to understand why he is fighting his feelings towards you is that men don’t experience feelings the same way women do.

That doesn’t mean that they are incapable of feeling, it just means they are wired differently.

Eles confiam primeiro nas suas mentes e racionalizam as coisas, deixando as emoções de lado, enquanto as mulheres, por outro lado, tendem a seguir os seus corações.

That’s why more often than not men and women fail to understand one another. If he displays signs he is fighting his feelings, give him enough time to process them.

Ele está a travar uma batalha consigo próprio e tem de o fazer sozinho. Tem de ultrapassar os seus medos ocultos de ser rejeitado e de ser magoado.

If he does that, he will very much earn a place in your life. If not, then you will have to leave him because you can’t fight his battles for him.