5 erros de relacionamento que alguém com ansiedade pode cometer
It’s almost impossible to prevent anxiety from influencing your love life. As hard as it is to keep your head above water, it’s even harder to give your best self to the relationship.
Think about it. Dating is stressful as it is, even for people who don’t suffer from anxiety, but for those who do, things can get even worse.
The thing with making relationship mistakes when you have anxiety is that you might not even be aware of them. For you, some things come naturally, and you don’t see them as a threat to your relationship.
That’s why knowing those mistakes and watching out for them might be just the thing you need to deal with them and make your relationships stronger and more stable.
So, let’s start:
1. Being “checked out”
Está lá fisicamente, mas mentalmente está a quilómetros de distância. A sua mente está sobrecarregada com os seus pensamentos e, por vezes, tem dificuldade em estar presente.
A sua relação pode sofrer com isso. Os laços entre si e o seu parceiro podem afrouxar porque ele se sentirá negligenciado.
Mesmo que a pessoa compreenda tudo e esteja ao seu lado em todos os momentos, se isto continuar, pode prejudicar gravemente a vossa relação.
No entanto, há medidas que pode tomar para melhorar a situação. Para além da terapia e do apoio que recebe das pessoas que fazem parte da sua vida, pode tentar treinar o seu cérebro para estar presente e apoiar verdadeiramente a pessoa de quem cuida. Os exercícios de atenção plena podem ajudar neste sentido.
2. Segunda avaliação
Pode ser difícil para ti acreditar que existe alguém neste mundo que te compreende e te aceita tal como tu és.
You find yourself unable to enjoy what you have, so you start second-guessing their feelings and intentions. So in a way, you are creating a problem where there’s none.
That’s why you need constant reassurance, proof of their love, which can be really tiring for your partner no matter how patient they might be.
They don’t see the point in saying they are into you, and that they are there to stay every few seconds. They wouldn’t be with you in the first place if they didn’t feel that way.
3. Esperar que eles resolvam a sua ansiedade
It’s wrong to expect someone to fix your anxiety. First of all, they don’t have that power; it’s all in your hands anyway. Second, it’s too much of a burden to bestow upon somebody.
Of course, your significant other should be there for you and support you, but that’s about it. All the other hard work is up to you.
Encontre algo que funcione para si. Pode ser desde meditação ou ioga para acalmar os seus pensamentos, pelo menos durante algum tempo, até todo o tipo de terapias. O importante é que cuide de si.
4. Fixação de rotina
Encontra uma dose de conforto em padrões familiares. Gosta que as coisas fiquem na mesma e a mudança não é sua amiga.
Unfortunately for you, relationships require change, so they can evolve and grow. Doing the same things over and over again won’t benefit you or your relationship.
In order to escape fixation to routine and your fear of change, you have to be honest about it with your partner. They won’t know it’s a problem if you don’t share it with them.
Talvez não consigam resolver a sua ansiedade, mas talvez o consigam ajudar com este problema específico, por isso seja honesto.
5. Tirar conclusões precipitadas
The worst thing you can do to your relationship is assuming the worst without having anything to back that up. It’s like that self-fulfilling prophecy: if you expect something bad will happen, it usually will.
It doesn’t have to be anything major. It could just be that your partner hasn’t texted you back right away, and you are already fearing that they might disappear on you or break up with you.
In reality, they might be at work, taking a shower, sleeping or hundreds of other possible scenarios that haven’t even crossed your mind.
It’s hard for you not to go all negative and switch into overthinking mode, but try to ground your thoughts and give have a bit more faith in your partner—they probably deserve that much.
