5 errori relazionali che una persona affetta da ansia può commettere

It’s almost impossible to prevent anxiety from influencing your love life. As hard as it is to keep your head above water, it’s even harder to give your best self to the relationship.

Think about it. Dating is stressful as it is, even for people who don’t suffer from anxiety, but for those who do, things can get even worse.

The thing with making relationship mistakes when you have anxiety is that you might not even be aware of them. For you, some things come naturally, and you don’t see them as a threat to your relationship.

That’s why knowing those mistakes and watching out for them might be just the thing you need to deal with them and make your relationships stronger and more stable.

So, let’s start:

1. Being “checked out”

Siete lì fisicamente, ma mentalmente siete a chilometri di distanza. La vostra mente è sopraffatta dai vostri pensieri e a volte vi è difficile essere presenti.

La vostra relazione può soffrire per questo. I legami tra voi e il vostro partner potrebbero allentarsi perché si sentirà trascurato.

Anche se capiscono tutto e vi sono vicini nella buona e nella cattiva sorte, se questa situazione si protrae, potrebbe danneggiare gravemente il vostro rapporto.

Tuttavia, ci sono dei passi da fare per migliorare la situazione. Oltre alla terapia e al sostegno che ricevete dalle persone che fanno parte della vostra vita, potete provare ad allenare il vostro cervello a essere presente e veramente presente per la persona amata. Gli esercizi di mindfulness possono aiutare in questo senso.

2. Seconda valutazione

Potrebbe essere difficile per voi credere che ci sia qualcuno in questo mondo che vi capisce e vi accetta. così come sei.

You find yourself unable to enjoy what you have, so you start second-guessing their feelings and intentions. So in a way, you are creating a problem where there’s none.

That’s why you need constant reassurance, proof of their love, which can be really tiring for your partner no matter how patient they might be.

They don’t see the point in saying they are into you, and that they are there to stay every few seconds. They wouldn’t be with you in the first place if they didn’t feel that way.

3. Aspettarsi che risolvano la vostra ansia

It’s wrong to expect someone to fix your anxiety. First of all, they don’t have that power; it’s all in your hands anyway. Second, it’s too much of a burden to bestow upon somebody.

Of course, your significant other should be there for you and support you, but that’s about it. All the other hard work is up to you.

Trovate qualcosa che faccia al caso vostro. Si può spaziare dalla meditazione o dallo yoga, per calmare i pensieri almeno per un po', a terapie di ogni tipo. L'importante è che vi prendiate cura di voi stessi.

4. Fissazione di routine

Trovate una dose di comfort negli schemi familiari. Vi piace che le cose rimangano uguali e il cambiamento non vi è amico.

Unfortunately for you, relationships require change, so they can evolve and grow. Doing the same things over and over again won’t benefit you or your relationship.

In order to escape fixation to routine and your fear of change, you have to be honest about it with your partner. They won’t know it’s a problem if you don’t share it with them.

Forse non saranno in grado di risolvere la vostra ansia, ma potrebbero essere in grado di aiutarvi con questo particolare problema, quindi siate onesti.

5. Saltare alle conclusioni

The worst thing you can do to your relationship is assuming the worst without having anything to back that up. It’s like that self-fulfilling prophecy: if you expect something bad will happen, it usually will.

It doesn’t have to be anything major. It could just be that your partner hasn’t texted you back right away, and you are already fearing that they might disappear on you or break up with you.

In reality, they might be at work, taking a shower, sleeping or hundreds of other possible scenarios that haven’t even crossed your mind.

It’s hard for you not to go all negative and switch into overthinking mode, but try to ground your thoughts and give have a bit more faith in your partner—they probably deserve that much.