6 coisas que os homens te dizem só para te chatear
A maioria dos homens diz praticamente qualquer coisa só para a levar para a cama. Normalmente, o que eles dizem é hilariante - se é que se percebe onde eles querem chegar.
Alguns deles dizem estas coisas porque estão realmente interessados em si e estão a ser honestos, mas a maior parte deles inventar um monte de tretas só para dar uma queca. (Surpresa, surpresa)
There are women who can read between the lines and who can see right through those sweet words and smooth actions. These women would be like: “Cut the crap and move along…”
But, some women fall for those men’s sneaky, ‘almost perfect’, BS techniques, and who can blame them? It has happened to us all, at least once.
Seriously, there are plenty of women who just want to have fun (read: have sex), but nooooo, for guys, ‘forbidden fruit’ is the sweetest
Por outras palavras, há homens que se excitam ao tentarem ter sexo com mulheres sérias que estão prontas para assentar, que estão prontas para se comprometerem a longo prazo.
Guys: Is that your fetish—to sleep with them and dump them? PARE, a sério, PARE!
There are plenty of horny, ‘just-wanna-have-fun’ fish in the sea. Pick one and let the games begin.
E, quanto às senhoras que se apaixonam por estes homens e se arrependem mais tarde, continuem a ler para ver até onde os homens estão dispostos a ir só para para o levar para a cama!
1. Prometem-lhe empenho
Ha! That’s a good one!
O gajo: “Babe, I like you so much, I wanna be with you…but not right now, ok babe? Don’t worry, soon we’re gonna be together…”
What a load of BS! The next thing you know, you are putting out because you think you love this guy. He is your future everything. And once the ‘thing’ is done, he disappears from the face of the earth!
You will sooner discover Atlantis than the place where he’s hiding.
2. Concordam com tudo o que dizes
Experimentem isto de vez em quando. Diga-lhes mentiras notórias e inacreditáveis. Dizer-lhes mentiras que são tão óbvias. Tenta não te rires enquanto fazes isto.
Tu: “Hey, you know my dad went to space?”
Ele: “Woooow, do you have any photos?” (Read: invite me over, I don’t care that you’re lying)
Tu: #eyeroll #sigh
Preciso de ir mais longe? Acho que já percebeste tudo.
Idiota ALERTA!
3. They know how to use ‘I love you’
You all know the scenario. You go out, you’re wearing a smoking hot dress, his jaw drops when he sees you.
Todo o encontro está carregado de energia sexual, com referências sexuais a saírem de ambos como fogo de artifício.
You go to his place, horny as hell. You let him get to ‘first base’ you but he is hoping for the Home Run.
Just when you say ‘wait’, there he goes with putting on a mask of the sweetest and most caring guy you’ve ever met.
The next thing you hear is whispering in your ear – I LOVE YOU… Yeah right! Snap out of it, don’t be stupid!
4. Alcohol is their ‘best friend’
It’s not their intention to get you hammered because, let’s face it, what good are you to them in that stage of drunkenness?
His plan is to get you tipsy—just a few drinks to make you feel as though you may ‘tip’ over … right into his bed.
It will get your inhibitions down and his confidence up. If you see his intentions aren’t honorable (usually, they aren’t), quit while you can.
5. Estão a falar com você
Ele: “Babe, you make me feel like I’ve never felt before…” #corte a porcaria
We all know that in most cases (especially when you have just started seeing each other) this means only one thing—Quero dar uma queca.
Don’t let them convince you they get weak in the knees when they see you because this usually happens only when sexual pleasure is involved—big applause to the ones who are an exception to the rule (if there are any).
Don’t forget, you have to take into consideration the timing when they tell you they have never felt like that before.
If it’s in the middle of the action, on the border between the first and second bases, come on! Get your head out of the sand!
6. Complementam o seu corpo
Está um tipo à tua frente, excitado como o raio, e diz-te que tens um corpo fantástico. VERIFICAÇÃO DA REALIDADE—he is eager to get some and he doesn’t care what you look like. He only cares about the functionality of your ‘lady parts’. #truthslap
Estas são as suas normas:
#1 boobs—checked
#2 ass—checked
#3 face doesn’t make me want to throw up—checked
Result—compliment
Women, girls, ladies…Don’t let men bullshit you—you are better than that!
